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 Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 3:38 am
IG relying on chain of command seems quite realistic to me. While Marines are used to act independently since scout times, and other armies rely on hive mind, farseer guidance etc., guardsmen must be led into battle by smart and charismatic commanders.
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 3:47 am
According to the background the officers are pigheaded and uncaring. sad
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 4:15 am
Guard Ranks are more as such
General
Leaps tall buildings with a single bound.
Is more powerful than a locomotive.
Is faster than a speeding bullet.
Walks on water.
Gives policy to God.
Colonel
Leaps short buildings with a single bound.
Is more powerful than a switch engine.
Is just as fast as a speeding bullet.
Walks on water if sea is calm.
Talks with God.
Lieutenant Colonel
Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds.
Is almost as powerful as a switch engine.
Is faster than a speeding B.B.
Walks on water in indoor swimming pools.
Talks with God if special request chit is approved.
Major
Barely clears quonset huts.
Loses tug of war with locomotive.
Can fire a speeding bullet.
Swims well.
Is occasionally addressed by God.
Captain
Makes high marks when trying to leap building.
Is run over by locomotives.
Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury.
Dog paddles.
Talks to animals.
First Lieutenant
Runs into buildings.
Recognizes locomotives two out of three times.
Is NOT issued ammunition.
Can stay afloat if properly instructed in the use of Mae West.
Talks to walls.
Second Lieutenant
Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter buildings.
Says: "LOOK AT THE CHOO-CHOO."
Wets himself with a water pistol.
Plays in mud puddles.
Mumbles to himself.
Sergeant (any)
Lifts buildings and walks under them.
Kicks locomotives off the tracks.
Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them.
Freezes water with a single glance. BECAUSE...
HE IS GOD!!!
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 4:18 am
The original is better! xp
Commanding General (Solar)
Leaps tall buildings in a single bound
Is more powerful than a Marauder Destroyer
Is faster than a speeding bullet
Walks on water
Gives policy to God
General (regiment)
Leaps short buildings in a single bound
Is more powerful than a Lightning star fighter
Is just as fast as a speeding bullet
Talks with God
Commander (regiment)
Leaps short buildings with a running start and favourable winds
Is almost as powerful a Lightning star fighter
Is faster than a speeding BB
Walks on water in an indoor swimming pool
Talks with God if a special request is honoured
Colonel
Barely clears a small hut
Loses tug of war with a chimera
Can fire a speeding bullet
Swims well
Is occasionally addressed by God
Captain
Goes around buildings
Is run over by Chimeras
Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury
Treads water
Talks to animals
Lieutenant
Runs into buildings
Recognizes Chimeras two out of three times
Is not issued ammunition
Can stay afloat with a life jacket
Talks to walls
Vet Sergeant
Smashes tall buildings
Knocks Chimeras off their tracks
Chews bullets and spits them out
Walks in space
He is God
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 6:09 am
well I didn't know there was a guard specific one. I just went with the old standby
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:02 pm
Mat & Winnie: Good stuff. Seriously, I laughed.
@ Evok: Guard have always relied on chain of command. Vox Casters used to be the only way that they were able to hang onto Ld.
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:04 pm
Mat Guard Ranks are more as such General Leaps tall buildings with a single bound. Is more powerful than a locomotive. Is faster than a speeding bullet. Walks on water. Gives policy to God. ... Sergeant (any) Lifts buildings and walks under them. Kicks locomotives off the tracks. Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them. Freezes water with a single glance. BECAUSE... HE IS GOD!!! Nice... *wonders how many people in the thread realize a Sergeant isn't an officer*
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:58 pm
Sweet bleeding lord hanging upon the cross...
Vendetta
Crazy a** skimmer.
Now, that's not too bad. The Valkyrie is a crazy a** skimmer in the same way.
The difference?
For the cost of 13 oldschool Plasma Guns, you have a crazy a** skimmer with 3 TL Lascannons.
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:20 pm
can anyone say A-10 tank killer?
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:31 pm
Van Evok can anyone say A-10 tank killer? ...I'm totally gonna mod mine to look like A-10s. Thanks for the idea.
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Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 9:28 pm
DarkElf27 Mat Guard Ranks are more as such General Leaps tall buildings with a single bound. Is more powerful than a locomotive. Is faster than a speeding bullet. Walks on water. Gives policy to God. ... Sergeant (any) Lifts buildings and walks under them. Kicks locomotives off the tracks. Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them. Freezes water with a single glance. BECAUSE... HE IS GOD!!! Nice... *wonders how many people in the thread realize a Sergeant isn't an officer* Non Commissioned Officer but really its right it refers to any rank of sergeant from e5 to e9 or properly fitting imperial guard equivalents Corporals aren't shown because due to their illusive nature they couldnt be found for this survey.... or any other duty for that matter.
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Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 12:24 am
Caleidah Van Evok can anyone say A-10 tank killer? ...I'm totally gonna mod mine to look like A-10s. Thanks for the idea. I'd more go with Apache or Hind, definitely Hind, because for that price the Vendetta retains its ability to carry a squad. Plus it can take the usual rocket pods or Hellstrike missiles plus door mounted heavy bolters.
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Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 2:29 am
Lt. Brookman Caleidah Van Evok can anyone say A-10 tank killer? ...I'm totally gonna mod mine to look like A-10s. Thanks for the idea. I'd more go with Apache or Hind, definitely Hind, because for that price the Vendetta retains its ability to carry a squad. Plus it can take the usual rocket pods or Hellstrike missiles plus door mounted heavy bolters. I can get that MI-24 model kit back out now. Good thing I have a bunch of Las Cannons laying around
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Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 5:56 am
Mat DarkElf27 Mat Guard Ranks are more as such General Leaps tall buildings with a single bound. Is more powerful than a locomotive. Is faster than a speeding bullet. Walks on water. Gives policy to God. ... Sergeant (any) Lifts buildings and walks under them. Kicks locomotives off the tracks. Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them. Freezes water with a single glance. BECAUSE... HE IS GOD!!! Nice... *wonders how many people in the thread realize a Sergeant isn't an officer* Non Commissioned Officer but really its right it refers to any rank of sergeant from e5 to e9 or properly fitting imperial guard equivalents Corporals aren't shown because due to their illusive nature they couldnt be found for this survey.... or any other duty for that matter. Corporal Hicks is in command now, I presume. - Ripley the Tyranid slayer, Ordo Xenos.
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Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:21 am
Van Evok Mat DarkElf27 Mat Guard Ranks are more as such General Leaps tall buildings with a single bound. Is more powerful than a locomotive. Is faster than a speeding bullet. Walks on water. Gives policy to God. ... Sergeant (any) Lifts buildings and walks under them. Kicks locomotives off the tracks. Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them. Freezes water with a single glance. BECAUSE... HE IS GOD!!! Nice... *wonders how many people in the thread realize a Sergeant isn't an officer* Non Commissioned Officer but really its right it refers to any rank of sergeant from e5 to e9 or properly fitting imperial guard equivalents Corporals aren't shown because due to their illusive nature they couldnt be found for this survey.... or any other duty for that matter. Corporal Hicks is in command now, I presume. - Ripley the Tyranid slayer, Ordo Xenos. wow I dont feel the need to beat you today. Now I just need to figure out what stuff I want for my vets / kill team
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