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 Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 4:07 pm
 nom nom nom... ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Don't worry. The only reason they put you in jail is because they didn't want the rest of the world to realize that they could sparkle too. It might cause more Twilight books to be created.
I'm calling from jail because I revealed my true form.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
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Posted: Thu May 12, 2011 11:06 am
Oh god no! I told you they wouldn't be able to handle your awesomeness!
I'm calling from jail because I didn't know policemen were so picky about sharing their donuts... D':
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Posted: Sat May 14, 2011 2:45 pm
 I told you not everyone likes to eat off each others plates. Or out of each others boxes as this case may be. . . o.O I'm calling from jail because I didn't put the left foot in. . .
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Posted: Sun May 15, 2011 1:01 pm
nom nom nom... ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ I told you that you left your foot at home.
I'm calling from jail because I moved to a nudist colony and wore clothes O.o.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
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Posted: Thu Jun 02, 2011 12:04 am
♣ "I told you you should have kept your clothes off! Shake what your momma' gave ya'!" ♣
"Im calling from jail because I put something in the toaster..."
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2011 4:41 pm
I told you a million times to stop putting innapropriate things into the toaster lol
I'm calling from jail because I let my tiger run loose in the middle of the city ~Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed~ 
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Posted: Mon Jun 13, 2011 7:50 pm
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
What have we told you about not playing fetch with the children?
I'm calling from jail because I flooded a Home Depot.
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
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Posted: Fri Jul 01, 2011 3:41 pm
I told you they didn't have public restrooms.
I'm calling from jail because I thought it was a different country's day.
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Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 9:59 pm
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
I'm calling from jail because I went cow tipping.
In a tank.
;X
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
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Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:20 pm
I told you to stick with pushing doors down!
I'm calling from jail because I paid my parking ticket in pennies.
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Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2011 4:33 pm
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
Calling from jail because I tripped over a turtle. Then stole it.
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
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Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2011 7:21 pm
—And you're clothes are worn out from dust;┏━━━━━━━━━┓
☢σяαиɕє נʊɩɔє☢
┗━━━━━━━━━┛
✂ I told you! No more turtle soup.
I'm calling from jail because the I took the knife from the kitchen drawer and proceeded to stuff it in my mouth. Covered in nutella. ✂ from just laying there—
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2011 7:22 pm
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
What have I told you about playing with pointy things?
I'm calling from jail because I broke into the jail and decided to stay.
♦ ♣ ♥ ♠
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:33 pm
I told you breaking in was a crime!
I'm calling from jail because I cant help eating a whole bottle of nutella when I see one- even through my neighbor's window O.o I heart nutella 4laugh
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Posted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 7:46 pm
I told you to wait until they were out of the house to steal there nutella!
Im calling from jail because i bought a fake ID and went to a bar and got totally waisted, and then started flashing people through windows.
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