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 Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 6:07 pm
Yup...looks like another RIG comin our way
I wonder though...how did natural selection screw up this badly?...hang on a sec...lemme turn on the TV...
GAIA HISTORY CHANNEL SPECIAL!!!
Long ago....in a world consumed by war....there was born a Guard (Homo absurdus)
This guard was the result of severe inbreeding within a tribe of monkeys, and as such knew nothing of the lost art of Door Opening...though some of the elders (monku stoopidus) puzzled for hours trying to figure out how regain this skill.
One day, the elders' work came to fruition, and they finally managed to open the Revolving Door of DOOM! *dun dun duuuunnn* Excited, they ushered in the entire inbred tribe of Guard and monkeys. Though...in their stupidity, the elders couldn't close the Revolving Door of DOOM! *dun dun duuuuuunnn*
They sat outside, puzzled once more. Perhaps if they opened the door in reverse, it would close? They never got to try, because just then Chuck Norris appeared from a timespace wormhole with a TANK (Totally Anonymous Nobody Kid) in his hands. Chuck landed on one of the Elder monkeys, crushing him amongst screams and hoots. The remaining Elders fled right into the Revolving Door of DOOM! *dun dun duuuunnn*
Their bodies clogged the door, locking it shut forever. The rest of the tribe became hopelessly trapped within, and for the next 3000 years survived by eating dirt, excrement, and whatever else could be found within...
3000 YEARS LATER:
Many years later, a BOOretheren would be digging yet another hole for a latrine when thier shovel struck something...odd. It was the decayed remains of the Revolving Door of DOOM! *dun dun duuuunnn* Further discovery would unearth the Guard tribe, so completely inbred that it was a wonder that they were still able to reproduce. The BOO as a whole investigated this, and eventually adopted some of the Elder-descended ones into their ranks.
Many expiditions were mounted, and soon their history could be pieced together from various tunnels and such within the complex. Turns out the occasional Guard was able to make it to the surface, and Carbon-dating tests show that the age of the collapsed tunnel-dirt coincides with outbreaks of Zombification back in Gaia. They get smarter, though, and seemed to have begun to make a language for themselves. The BOO began to teach the particularly gifted Guards.
They were trainable...barely....and only able to do the most meaningless of tasks...like the guarding of doors. The Guards obviously were too stupid to die, much less open doors. This created a new job just for them, they got all the excrement they could eat, in exchange for letting nobody through their assigned door. "Best...Idea...EVER" one BOOretheren says
TV turned off
*BLOOP*
"...well....now we know! And I guess that also solves the issue of their survival, they're all ZOMBIES!!!"
NOTE: No Chucks or TANKs were harmed in the making of this historical documentary
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 6:16 pm
LOL Maborofel, you're really getting into this aren't you? x'D
Hmm... I don't see anything I particularly like in this RIG, but I liek RIGS. They are fun. ;3; Knowing me, I'm probably going to go broke again.
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 6:21 pm
what can I say...background stories are fun
...though I think it was a waste of time...I began typing it right after I posted the time before
...besides, now we know where zombies came from...CHUCK NORRIS MADE THEM!!!
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 7:22 pm
mhmm
Now I need me a copy of Dragon Age...
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:15 pm
Nii Amikasame Yeah, like Lorika said, I went for Human Noble. Here be she in all her bloody glory! (*U*)/ Oooo Alistair gives you flowers? *gleeful wiggle* o3o How did you link your character to that website?!?! Love her!
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:53 pm
Panda Of The Twilight "M-Ma'am, There's been trouble! The prisoner...he escaped!!!" Wait, what the hell Panda?
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 10:53 pm
Feline Godess Nii Amikasame Yeah, like Lorika said, I went for Human Noble. Here be she in all her bloody glory! (*U*)/ Oooo Alistair gives you flowers? *gleeful wiggle* o3o How did you link your character to that website?!?! Love her!
*luffles her tew* heart
Register your game onto your profile in the website. All you need is the CD key. Well... for the PC version, anyways. I have no idea what they ask for in the console versions. Quick! Register yours so I can see your character! O3O
HUZZAR I'M BACK FROM CLASS! DRAGON AGE TIEM! After I'm done working on a post, that is. >U>
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:05 pm
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:22 pm
StormDawn Panda Of The Twilight "M-Ma'am, There's been trouble! The prisoner...he escaped!!!" Wait, what the hell Panda? 
What what the hell Storm? A giant tiger man breaks out of prison and he's going to ninja around while injured trying to find the infirmary? I never implied that the soldiers you injured got back up, and it's not like there is only 2 in the entire temple. So what exactly is the problem?
-says the cranky panda-
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:26 pm
There were no guards injured....
And the two were following him with swords at him on his way to the infirmary!
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:30 pm
ok none were injured, i still never implied that the guards with you were the ones in the study now, I just said some guards. so with that variable in mind, that give you the opportunity to interact with your guards, and gives lorika panda......and yourself possible means of leaving the study to expand the plot more.
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:40 pm
okay, sorry.
Didn't mean to sound snappish, and I succeed to your infallible wisdom in this manner. Joking/being sarcastic I am not.
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:42 pm
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:45 pm
lol it's okay, I do know where your coming from. It took me awhile to find a way to make it vague enough so it wouldn't seem like I stole the guards from you. Just wanted to expand on the plot and make it interesting
I'd have probably done the same thing as you more then likely. especially since those guards are tied to your character at the moment
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 11:47 pm
And when you watch that vid, watch it the whole way through.
No quiting halfway.
and yeah, it was actually a really good tie in.
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