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 Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2005 11:19 am
Yay, I suck! domokun I'm not the most effective leader, am I?
The plot's moving quite fast now, almost speeding towards a resolution. I may just get this vibe because of all the battle scenes, though. Definetly holds my attention.
I particularly like the wall of bones defense. I can see it clearly, and I wish I had the skill to draw it.
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Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2005 12:26 pm
Gendou I've noticed that the comments are slowing down quite a lot - is the story becoming boring, or dragging out too long? If there's something I need to fix with the plotting or pacing, let me know. I mean for this to be entertaining, and if people have stopped reading it because it lacks entertainment value, I'd like to know. For me, the answer is none of the above; I simply hate redundancy. In other words, most of my feelings on the story (all positive by the way) have been expressed in previous posts. To my mind, compliments and commentary lose their sincerity if repeated too often. I'm also just lazy, so that's something else to keep in mind. Anyway, I do have to say that your portrayals of the characters seem to be, ah, very true to life, at least in the situations that I'm qualified to judge. I know that I've certainly recognized myself in Blue, what with the off-handed mutterings that he (and I) are prone to among other things. By the way, even if I'm not actively commenting on the technical aspects of the piece, would it be good if I simply put up a post from time to time letting you know that I am still reading the story and that I am still enjoying it?
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Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2005 1:42 pm
I'm still reading! I just like to read the whole thing befoe I make comments, so all you are going to get from me until the end is a 'yay' every post. You are doing a grand job, and I wait for each new post anxiously. It's not dragging, odds are we have all just slid into the happy drug of reading a good book. After you read a chapter of a book you don't jump around excitedly, it's all just a happy state of being pleased. At least that's how I feel. And more than a little excited.
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Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2005 2:25 pm
Gendou Ruevian, however, wasn't letting herself be distracted. Instead drove forward towards the armored were-cat. ^ This part needs to be rephrased, I think. Also, I wonder what Mory's doing right now. ^_^ Hee hee, I hope she's not daydreaming. If I don't have any useful comments, it's just because I'm a wierd person. You see, unlike most, I think battle scenes are some of the most boring parts of stories. I can tell you are doing very well, though.
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Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2005 2:57 pm
Katane Also, I wonder what Mory's doing right now. ^_^ Hee hee, I hope she's not daydreaming.
Our insipid intrepid heroine PRINCESS MORY is lying on a beat-up, abandoned bed in one corner of the cabin, absentmindedly playing with the wooden spoon she used to stir last chapter's stew.MORY: The dark man doesn't seem so bad for someone who's supposed to be evil and stuff. His eye is kind of scary, though. The last guy who kidnapped me had MUCH better eyes. I wonder where he is right now. *sigh~* They better be coming to save me, it's really cold here and it smells like bones. Sounds of the battle drift in from off screen. MORY does not pay much attention, continues twirling the wooden spoon around.MORY, CONT'D: I wonder what that sound is. I bet it's more animals. Stupid woods. I hope they show up soon, we should get to town as soon as possible. Where the heck are they? La la la~... ... sweatdrop No, seriously, my guess is that she's under the same spell Gendou used to make her sleep right after he kidnapped her. That's why she's not really doing anything. Besides, do you want a princess-turned-barwench-turned-quest-item in your battle? No. She'd do something stupid and get herself killed.
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Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2005 6:57 pm
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 3:52 am
Chapter Twenty-One is up for your reading enjoyment.
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 4:06 am
Dude. Rue? Totally redeemed from her recent smackdown. Speaking of which, it's a good thing people have ribcages, yes?
The battle was awesome, again. heart The dialogue was my favorite thing, though... guess why. surprised
NecroGendou's an a** and I will cry if/when he bites it.
"But Grayed! He's all stabbinated." rolleyes
I didn't see 'And then he died,' written anywhere! stare
"Stabbinated in the THROAT, Grayed!" stressed
STILL OKAY! scream
Mory? That was hawt. Nice shot.
3nodding
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 4:14 am
surprised Mory stabbing Gendou! Must be one of those love-hate relationships then. ninja
Still nice stuff. The battles are well depicted, and that wall of bone was a particular favourite. 3nodding
'twill be interesting to see why(/if) Gendou saved them intentionally.
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 5:04 am
HOLYSHITOMGWTF??!!%1
*explodes*
No, no, it's the good kind of shock and awe!
*giddy*
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 7:39 am
Eighteen: Ah, Graye is still with them! And they haven't told her about Gendou. surprised
Nineteen: Is Gendou standing or sitting? Ah, he's standing, then sits.
Man, first the Legion finds Gendou, then the were-legion does. No luck. crying heart
Twenty: Ananel: 2, Gendou: 3. 3nodding
Ruevian vs. Kia! ...and Rue is described as an assassin. surprised Given her skill with short blades, I'd guess that's a general description rather than situational.
Twenty-one: Ha! Gendou turns! blaugh I wonder what his motivation is. And now that he (and most of the Legion) is (are) wounded, I wonder how long he will stick around.
Sorry I haven't been commenting. I've not been paying attention. sweatdrop
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 8:44 am
..... the Weston/Mory romance is a go?
But it was too obvious!!! crying
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 10:42 am
eek
.....
...THAT WAS AWESOME. heart
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 11:03 am
Westonian Eighteen: Ah, Graye is still with them! And they haven't told her about Gendou. surprised ... ... ... gonk Is she too stupid to recognize him?! crying
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 11:14 am
Katane ..... the Weston/Mory romance is a go? But it was too obvious!!! crying ...it sure seems to be. *Weston/Mory shippers everywhere rejoice* That said, it does seem to pop up completely randomly in the story... but considering that Rue and Gen were the ORIGINAL Morytonian Conspirators, it was bound to happen. xd
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