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Deletemeplease80 rolled 6 6-sided dice:
5, 5, 1, 3, 3, 4
Total: 21 (6-36)
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 Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 7:28 pm
wow; 2 wins in a row! Now if only I cold get that 36! xd
So this russian man who is on really hard times is dumpster diving and finds an old bottle. He starts cleaning it off to see if anything is inside and low and behold... there is a genie!
Genie gives him 3 wishes, so the guys asks for long life, and good health. The genie grants both of these and the guy feels so much better that he did before. "What is your final wish?" asks the genie. "Well, I want to pee the worlds finest vodka" says the guy. The wish is granted, the genie leaves and the guy is left there alone.
He decides to test out the 3rd wish and seeing the bottle in his hand- well he fills it up! He takes a sip from it; and wow!, it IS the best vodka he's ever had!
A couple hours later he stumbles home, absolutely snockered and his wife asks him how he got drunk- he didn't have any money for booze. He tells her about the genie and how he can now pee the worlds finest vodka. She's astonished, and asks him to prove it- so he pees her a glass. She drinks it and is so astonished- its the best vodka she's EVER had. So she asks him for another glass.
"No, from now on you drink from bottle" he says.
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Deletemeplease80 rolled 6 6-sided dice:
2, 4, 6, 4, 2, 2
Total: 20 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 7:29 pm
The weekend comes after friday!
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Foxmore rolled 6 6-sided dice:
6, 2, 3, 3, 5, 6
Total: 25 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 7:31 pm
Kareena80 The weekend comes after friday! yay
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koudelkaW rolled 6 6-sided dice:
3, 2, 4, 2, 5, 5
Total: 21 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 7:32 pm
A neatly dressed salesman stopped a man in the street and asked -
"Sir, would you like to buy a a bottle of this mouthwash for $200.00?"
Aghast, the man said, "are you NUTS?, that's robbery!"
The salesman seemed hurt and then tries again -
"Sir, since you are a bit irate, I'll sell it to you for 1/2 price at $100.00?
Again, the man replies bluntly - "you must be crazy pal, now go away!"
The salesman then reaches into his briefcase and pulls out 2 brownies and begins munching away on one of them. He tells the irate guy -
"Sir, please share one of my brownies since I have annoyed you so much".
Unwrapping the brownie, the guy takes a bite; suddenly, the guys spits it out and says:
"HEY," he snarled, "this brownie tastes like crap!!!"
"It is," replied the salesman. "Wanna buy some mouthwash?"
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 7:33 pm
HAHA.. I really did lol at that one.
There was this little guy sitting in a bar, drinking, minding his own business when all of a sudden this great big guy comes in and --WHACK!! -- knocks him clean off the bar stool and onto the floor. The big guy says, "That was a karate chop from Korea."
The little guy thinks "GEEZ," but he gets back up on the stool and starts drinking again when all of a sudden --WHACK-- the big guy knocks him down AGAIN and says, "That was a judo chop from Japan."
So the little guy has had enough of this... He gets up, brushes himself off and quietly leaves. The little guy is gone for an hour or so when he returned. Without saying a word, he walks up behind the big idiot and --Bong!!!-- bangs the big guy off his stool, knocking him out cold!!!
The little guy looks at the bartender and says, "When he comes to, tell him that was a crowbar from Sears."
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Foxmore rolled 6 6-sided dice:
6, 4, 6, 4, 1, 4
Total: 25 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 7:37 pm
man! I always forget to roll...
A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, Ribbit 9 Iron." The man looks around and doesn't see anyone. Again, he hears, "Ribbit 9 Iron." He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts the club away, and grabs a 9 iron. Boom! He hits it 10 inches from the cup. He is shocked. He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky frog, eh? The frog replies, "Ribbit Lucky frog."
The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?" the man asks. "Ribbit 3 wood." The guy takes out a 3 wood and, Boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "OK where to next?" The frog replies, "Ribbit Las Vegas." They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "OK frog, now what?" The frog says, "Ribbit Roulette." Upon approaching the roulette table, The man asks, "What do you think I should bet?" The frog replies, "Ribbit $3000, black 6." Now, this is a million-to-one shot to win, but after the golf game the man figures what the heck. Boom! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table.
The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful." The frog replies, "Ribbit Kiss Me." He figures why not, since after all the frog did for him, he deserves it. With a kiss, the frog turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl. "And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room. So help me God or my name is not William Jefferson Clinton."
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koudelkaW rolled 6 6-sided dice:
6, 5, 5, 5, 2, 1
Total: 24 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 8:20 pm
LOL they were brilliant xd
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Foxmore rolled 6 6-sided dice:
5, 2, 3, 1, 3, 5
Total: 19 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 8:31 pm
In a city park stood two statues, one female and the other male. These two statues faced each other for many years. Early one morning an angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish. I hereby give you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire." And with that command, the statues came to life.
The two statues smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping.
After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have 15 minutes. Would you like to continue?"
The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?"
Smiling, the female statue said, "Sure. But this time YOU hold the pigeon down and I'LL poop on its head!"
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Reivyn-chan rolled 6 6-sided dice:
1, 4, 5, 5, 3, 2
Total: 20 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 8:55 pm
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koudelkaW rolled 6 6-sided dice:
3, 2, 5, 1, 2, 3
Total: 16 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:08 pm
I was sitting behind a car at a stop light the other day and I noticed that it had a bumper sticker that read "Honk if you love Jesus". So I thought about it a bit and since I loved Jesus, I honked my horn.
I was very suprised when the driver of the car got out and yelled, "The light is still red you a*****e!!!!" got back in the car and drove off through the light which had just turned green.
Lol I loved this XD
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Foxmore rolled 6 6-sided dice:
5, 3, 1, 3, 4, 4
Total: 20 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:15 pm
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dark_angel_32189 rolled 6 6-sided dice:
6, 3, 1, 1, 2, 2
Total: 15 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:51 pm
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koudelkaW rolled 6 6-sided dice:
6, 4, 3, 1, 4, 3
Total: 21 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:53 pm
Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:55 pm
either that was a joke, or I am just sick and found it funny. lol.
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Foxmore rolled 6 6-sided dice:
3, 3, 1, 5, 4, 2
Total: 18 (6-36)
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:55 pm
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