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 Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 2:17 pm
Captain Chemosh @Aakosir: Hmmm... only things left that I can recommend would be: Password lock his computer. Or get a good magnet and make death threats to his computer. He's definitely in the wrong though and needs to get a reality check fast.
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 2:35 pm
xX_Callum_Xx Chieftain Twilight xX_Callum_Xx Chieftain Twilight xX_Callum_Xx Chieftain Twilight nahw, it's coolio. ^_^ I'm pretty underdeveloped in my communication skills as it is. sweatdrop I'm glad to see you here. smile folks like you are exactly the kinda people we need here. we're a sanctuary for everyone who is Peaceful. ^_^ myself, I'm a Fighter because I'm a Lover. the way I see it, if you have something worthe keeping and protecting, that something is worthe Fighting for. if you Serve and/or Fight for a purposeless cause, an empty reason or no reason at all... you don't even have a motivation. I'm not saying folks who fight for themselves are lacking motivation or purpose. Selfishness is no worse than Compassion. but there is always the person who fights because he doesn't have anything better to do... that is just sad. I guess what I'm saying is I don't like the "rebels without a cause"... sweatdrop but I Respect anyone who has a Cause, even if I don't agree with that Cause. every Villain is a Hero to someone else, and vice-versa. ^_^ no need to give a damn what others think. be you. that's all we ca ask of ourselves. because we cn never satisfy everyone. that is why we form groups, and clans, and social circles. Thank you. And I'm very proud to be here. I'm glad to be able to give others the help and support that they need if they need it. I didn't when I needed it and most are amazed to even see me alive still but I am a fighter because I have been pushed down so many times in my life by so many people. For a time, I was going to give up but I always fought because something deep inside me told me to keep on fighting, that there was something worth all the fighting.
And the people that fight without a cause, the rebels, I don't think less of them, nor do I hate them or dislike them. Do you know why that is? The reason being is because they are people too. They are living, breathing, human beings and they must have a reason to do the things that they do. People make mistakes. A lesson I am very well aware of. The people that are the rebels and fight for no reason, maybe they had made a mistake in their lives previously and they have nothing now. And maybe they just need someone to show them in the right direction.
I do know one thing. If I ever meet a person like so, I will do everything in my power to help him/her get back on their feet and fight for a cause. I don't like seeing people hurting. It hurts me. Gods, yer incredible, woman! whee Chem, you realy know how to pick'em! you better keep her! seriously, I'm so glad you joined. smile I'm gonna like having you around here. -laughs nervously-
I plan to stick with him for forever and ever. :3
Thank you. I'm gonna like being here. It's a really nice Guild. Don't point this out as rude but.... The Guild could kinda use a bit of cleaning.. sweatdrop yeh, it tends to fall into disrepair when School gets back in... sweatdrop Shan had almost singlehandedly cleaned it up around the holidays, and you should have seen it before then. ._. total mess. made me feel ashamed of myself. sweatdrop when activity picks up it can be alot better. smile I had better start doing some maintanence though... thanks for reminding me. ^_^ Aww.. You shouldn't be ashamed. Surely it wasn't your fault. :3
And you're quite welcome. ^.^ heh... I'm the Captain of this Guild, I shouldn't put ALL the work on my Vice-Captains.... redface it was laziness on my part.
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Chieftain Twilight Captain
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 2:36 pm
@Aakosir: eek That is one badass PC! Okay, that doesn't present as big a problem as it seems though. If you open it up you can just remove the hard drive, once you have that in hand you'll have total control since all his games will be on the line.
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 2:38 pm
xd im un-married. lol.
hmm...speaking on masculine and feminininonuniim razz i guess id be more of the masculine part ^ ^; ...>.>; i have no clue on how to be a 'girl' ninja
but on a side note....does anyone one know a single male whose country (not redneck) and 30 or 31? sweatdrop
lol...im a nut....spooky lookin for a country guy xD. ...oh yeah...farming and livestock a plus rofl
=P think ill go back to gluing the cinderella puzzle together =3
<(^-^)>
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 2:40 pm
Twi...your not lazy your just busy 3nodding
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 2:56 pm
Chieftain Twilight xX_Callum_Xx Chieftain Twilight xX_Callum_Xx Chieftain Twilight Gods, yer incredible, woman! whee Chem, you realy know how to pick'em! you better keep her! seriously, I'm so glad you joined. smile I'm gonna like having you around here. -laughs nervously-
I plan to stick with him for forever and ever. :3
Thank you. I'm gonna like being here. It's a really nice Guild. Don't point this out as rude but.... The Guild could kinda use a bit of cleaning.. sweatdrop yeh, it tends to fall into disrepair when School gets back in... sweatdrop Shan had almost singlehandedly cleaned it up around the holidays, and you should have seen it before then. ._. total mess. made me feel ashamed of myself. sweatdrop when activity picks up it can be alot better. smile I had better start doing some maintanence though... thanks for reminding me. ^_^ Aww.. You shouldn't be ashamed. Surely it wasn't your fault. :3
And you're quite welcome. ^.^ heh... I'm the Captain of this Guild, I shouldn't put ALL the work on my Vice-Captains.... redface it was laziness on my part. Just as Spooky-Fangula said, you're not lazy. You are just busy, my friend. :3
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 3:26 pm
Hehe... so my wife's birthday is today... stupid parents making phonecalls. I wonder what part of "leave me alone" they don't understand.
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 4:11 pm
Captain Chemosh @Aakosir: eek That is one badass PC! Okay, that doesn't present as big a problem as it seems though. If you open it up you can just remove the hard drive, once you have that in hand you'll have total control since all his games will be on the line.
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 5:18 pm
@Aakosir: Your hubby sounds a bit like an a**...sorry to seem so blunt about it but still... He needs to get the councilling with you, he sounds like he thinks the world revolves around him and that you just sit there; an inanimate object or something with no feelings. I don't care if he's the best guy in the world, he's got some self-rightious (spell check?) issues.
@Foxyfire: Ugh, phone calls from random relatives...I hate it when they won't stop either sweatdrop
@Callum: You seem pretty cool and confident, welcome to the guild ^^
@Twi: Yeah, you and shandrel have done a great job. I'd love to help with a "Spring Clean-up"
@Spooky: I hope your kid gets better, or that he doesn't have it 3nodding and I do think I know a guy like that, but he's my uncle...
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 5:40 pm
XxcloudedsightxX @Aakosir: Your hubby sounds a bit like an a**...sorry to seem so blunt about it but still... He needs to get the councilling with you, he sounds like he thinks the world revolves around him and that you just sit there; an inanimate object or something with no feelings. I don't care if he's the best guy in the world, he's got some self-rightious (spell check?) issues.
I'm going to have a talk with him in a minute. He's been in a shitty mood since he got home. But then again, I have been ignoring him, pretty much. Not like he deserves anything else right now...
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 5:59 pm
eek *sits on the couch with a bowl of popcorn* ...the suspense...drama...fights....oh wait this isnt wrestling cool
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 6:40 pm
Well, you do seem to have allot of problems right now Kosi, but the situation sounds like it is hitting critical.
You might want to stop approaching him to talk, and let him approach you. If you keep going to him, he is going to get more and more adamant NOT to talk.
In the mean time, work hard to bring your nerves down from critical point... Make a list, mental or written, it doesn't matter, but make one of all the things you love about him, and the things you saw in him when you married. Yeah you know them already, but it's an exercise that allows you to release a bit of anger...
In truth, from what you say, it sounds like your husband wants a bit of distance, and if you can give him that, he may start relinquishing some of the things you want...
Then, if you can hold out until he approaches you, maybe you can bring yourself to focus on what he needs to say. He probably isn't talking now, because he has something to say that won't be easy for him to say, but he can't bring himself to say it when you are the one starting the conversation.
Take a couple days to just love him, give him the space he needs, and be available when he finally can bring himself to approach you...
He may have been an a** lately, but he isn't really a bad guy, right? We all have those times when we aren't at our best. He has seen you have those times as well. You really should drop his tally sheet of "jerk moments". Although you have the right to keep it, and he deserves your ire, can you see that it is helping you deal with things, or just making you more angry at his behavior lately?
It is hard to do, but for the sake of your love for your husband, and the sake of getting past this hard time, I ask that you find it in your heart to forgive him, and do your best not to punish him. Even if he doesn't do the same for you, sometimes we can change the way others act towards us by the example we set for them.
If you guys last to the Golden, you will have about a million more times like this, and you will need to learn not to hold these a**-hole periods against your guy for the rest of your days, and maybe he will learn not to hold your b***h-day episodes against you. It took me and mine 5 years to learn, but things are easier now.
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Posted: Tue Feb 08, 2011 7:54 pm
wahmbulance TMI warning ahead! wahmbulance
@ Aakosir- I know this may sound weird, but have you thought of masturbation? It helps with the sex jonesing and can really make a guy either horny or wondering why the hell he is playing a game rather than doing what the d***o is doing. It works on my boyfriend all the time; if he even thinks that I'm doing "something", he stops gaming and comes to investigate. Quite often leading to fun blaugh It also gives you some sexual control back. You don't have to rely on him for sex. You can do it yourself. It just happens to be more fun together, but it sounds like he needs to learn that again.
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Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 7:38 am
XxcloudedsightxX @Aakosir: Your hubby sounds a bit like an a**...sorry to seem so blunt about it but still... He needs to get the councilling with you, he sounds like he thinks the world revolves around him and that you just sit there; an inanimate object or something with no feelings. I don't care if he's the best guy in the world, he's got some self-rightious (spell check?) issues. @Foxyfire: Ugh, phone calls from random relatives...I hate it when they won't stop either sweatdrop @Callum: You seem pretty cool and confident, welcome to the guild ^^ @Twi: Yeah, you and shandrel have done a great job. I'd love to help with a "Spring Clean-up" @Spooky: I hope your kid gets better, or that he doesn't have it 3nodding and I do think I know a guy like that, but he's my uncle... Thank you, XxcloudedsightxX, it's great to be here. :3
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Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2011 8:45 am
All of my toys are broken right now... I buy the cheap ones because I don't feel like spending $40 or so on a good one, but after spending about $35 on three different ones to have them break, I am seeing that I have wasted all that money. So my next one will be a bit more expensive, but it better last. Or I'm contacting the company XD
But last night was an interesting string of events. I was asking all sorts of questions with no answers, until I actually sat on top of him XD Weird, but it worked. He answered some things, and of course, I ended up getting very hurt when I asked "It does feel good after sex, right?" He said it didn't. (We realized the problem later). So I left, crying, and laid down on the couch. He went out to smoke, came back in and drank some rum. I'm pretty sure it was a good bit. I hear the liquor cabinet open and close twice, then nothing. I go to check on him and find him practically collapsed on the floor. I coddle him, ask him if he's okay, then we have some heartfelt talk on the cold floor. I manage to get him to bed and we have some more good talk. I asked if he drank as a cry for attention. He said he did it so he wouldn't feel. (He doesn't drink like that, so I guess he was feeling really bad) I asked what he was feeling, he said everything. I asked, about what. Once again, everything. Then I brought up that I do care about him, he said he knows and at one point almost started crying. I asked if he didn't like to feel that bad things then why not concentrate on the good. He said "Everything good always turns to ash." That struck me hard, he never talks like that. And holy s**t I feel like I am writing some cliche romance novel XD But that's what it felt like. The strong woman comforting her warrior, who really isn't as together as he makes it seem. I realized how much of a kid he is, how scared he is of the real world. He has a lot of issues that he keeps to himself and I have no clue how to help because he keeps it all inside until he breaksdown. For the first time in a while, we actually made love last night. I had realized this a while ago, but I think it finally sank in for him, that everything else was just primal needs. So afterwards, I asked if it felt good after that time. He said yes. And of course, I had to point out that there was actually emotion, other than naturalistic needs and wants, involved.
I think his breakdown last night made him realize that he actually is the one who has a lot of issues. And he apologized to me for being in a bad mood when he got home! I apologized first, because I did practically shut him out when he came through the door, but the fact that he apologized is a HUGE step!
I know I need to calm down and not attack him like I do, but I get so frustrated when he doesn't talk. He knows this. Or atleast, he should.
I will take you up on that list idea, Elta. I think it would be really good for me since I have been focusing on the bad. And after last night, I do realize that he does need a lot of loving attention. He said something about all the people that said they cared either turned their backs on him or were fake. I can relate to that. I even told him the reason I start to poke and prod, saying s**t that I know I will regret, is because I want some kind of reaction. I made a comment about him mom last night, but he didn't even budge... She calls him "Matti"... Drive me ******** nuts. So I said some to the effect of, "If I want you to answer should I start calling you Matti" I was mad, he wasn't even paying attention, so that one just dissipated...
And holy crap, sorry for the long a** post
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