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 Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 1:34 am
Yamagawa…Yamagawa was warmer, Kiba was almostmaybe sure of it. It just…Kiba felt warmer, and maybe that was because of the fireyrockets shooting through his blood and eating at the cold, but it was probably maybe also because Yamagawa was warmer and not as cold. Which meant that Yamagawa wasn’t as lonelycolddarkemptylonely anymore, which meant that Kiba had fixed it –whatever it was—which was god because Kiba hadn’t meant to break it but he had and now he had fixed it. Maybe. Possibly. There…there was a chance he hadn’t fixed it, that Yamagawa really wasn’t getting warmnotlonely, but…but Kiba wanted to believe that he had helped fix it because he wantedneeded Yamagawa not to be lonely, wanted Yamagawa to be warm, because colddarkemptyalone was so sad…
Carefullytentativelyslowly, Kiba slipped his tongue past the redhead’s lips, almost asking permission, even though he had asked and he had gotten permission already because Yamagawa had opened his lips was was permission but…but he still kindofmaybe wanted it because he didn’t want to do wrong, didn’t want to make this wrong, because if he did something wrong Yamagawa would go away frm him again and leave him all alone which was sad so that couldn’t happen because surely being left alone so much would break Kiba? Kiba was always alone but Yaagawa made him not feel alone which was a nice feeling, so he had to keep it and…and not be alone…
Making another fluttery sound –not so much nervousflutteryscared this time, just…just a sound—Kiba tightened his grip on Yamagawa’s shirt, pressingarchingpulling closeclosecloserneverlethimgo into the kiss, tongue delving –still tentatively, but maybe less so—across the roof of the redhead’s mouth. It…it was a nice feeling, this feeling, and…and even if IceYamagawa had said meanharshicy words, this Yamagawa –whichever Yamagawa he was—had a niceyummywarm mouth so maybe IceYamagawa wasn’t completely cold because cold people couldn’t have warm mouths, right? Because cold people said cold words and cold words made cold mouths, so it just…it didn’t work.
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 2:04 am
Oh god.
Ohgodohgodohgodgodgodgod..!
The green eyes --flickerflickerflickertintchangeflickeringdarkwarmcolddarkwarmwarm-- shot open in a surprised sort of look, a low purry soft strangehappy sort of noise escaping from the back of his throat to be lost in the kiss lost in Kiba's mouthtonguewarmth and the feeling and ohgod --if there was a god that he could possibly actually believe because he didn't ever-- it felt sososososo gooood it sent bright streaks of light shooting across his eyes and straight down his spine all tingly and sharp and spiky and.. and so good..!
Don't stop, the redhead wanted to say, but his lips were caught in Kiba's and his tongue stole his voice his very breath away the way it curledtraced the roof of his mouth and nobody had ever done that before and even though it felt nervousflutterystrange and maybe just a little bit of mixed feelingness --flutterygoodbadwarmfearshakinggood-- it was warm and that's all it mattered, because.. because now just maybereallyalittleonlymaybe he was warm too, the familiar feelingcoalburning orangeyred sort of feeling returning living again in the pit of his stomach, chippingmelting away at the icycoldness and.. and even though a slight sort of panic flared up from inside the smallparticyness of Yamagawa at the fierymeltingness, because theyheit needed ice needed the coldness to protect him protect them but Yamagawa didn't care because now he had Kiba. And if he had Kiba, Kiba to protect and be protected and warmheatniceness Kiba and.. and just Kiba all of him everythinganything all of him then.. then Yamagawa wouldn’t need wouldn’t need any of those any of those maskveilwallsice again.
"Pllleeease..!" His tongue slid against the other's, another softshakinghardtremor going through at the slickwet contact, and the redhead arched curved his spine up pressingpushingrolling up against the green haired male, pressing their bodies together trying to get closer even moremoremore more of the warmth so he wouldn’t need anything else anyone else again just himthemKiba and nothing else would ever matter even the vague darkflickeringsnakeslitheringthing..!
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 2:46 am
He absently flexed his hands, feeling the musclestendonbone shift under the tightly bound leather strap.. thing.. that they had tied around his wrists, pinning him to the coldcoldfreezing metal surface of the tablething that he hardly felt, just feeling the numbness and a slight slight relief through his body at the cool contact. The dark eyes flickered boredlyblankly up at the brightcoldlightness of the lamp above him, making his pale blueish tinged skin stand out even more in contrast against his pitch-black hair and only a slight hint of furrowing in his brows as his pupils almost constricted to the size of pinpricks against the bright light.
Why had they brought him here?
He breathed out, feeling noticing fastinated by the slow rise of pale, almost invisible puff of breath and the audible creaking of leather straps as he shifted, eyes leaving the lightcoldblazing lamp to stare at the rest of the room instead. It was nothing much; just this table, him, some rusty cabinets, just the usual sort of private-don't-disturb experiment lab room thing. He had been --another vague sort of memory-- he had been in these sort of rooms plenty, all reeking with blood and fluid and death and badickynasty things..
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 2:47 am
Warm…
The ice was melting. All the ice inside of Kiba was melting away, vanishing by the warmhotburninglovely warmness of Yamagawa’s kisstouchtastetonguemouthohmygod and it was perfectbeautifulgreatwonderfullovelywarm…warmwarmwarmalmostburninghotbutwarm, and if Kiba was getting warm then that meant that IceYamagawa didn’t have a hold on him anymore which meant that IceYamagawa was warming up which also meant that Yamagawa wasn’t lonely because cold was lonely and Yamagawa wasn’t cold anymore so therefore he wasn’t lonely. And…and Kiba had to stay and keep making Yamagaawa warmnotlonely because he had promised and he had to keep his promise no matter what no matter who nothing and he had to stay.
He wasn’t putting up much of a fight. Kiba wanted to stay.
He let out a soft moanlongingwantingneedingpressingcravinglow sort of sound, his left hand releasing Yamagawa’s shirt to trace upward, gently cupping the back of the other’s neck in an effort to simply pull him closer because close was good, close was warm. His other hand –his right hand—stayed where it was, uncurling on the cloth and pressing flat against the redhead’s chest. He…Kiba liked feeling Yamagawa’s heartbeat, so he knew that…that Yamagawa was alive and here and this wasn’t some dream that would vanish when he woke up. Because everything the good things –like the kissing Yammagawa—happened, Kiba got sososoafraid that this was a dream, but it wasn’t because Kiba could feel Yamagawa’s heart and it was…it was alive and real and here so this wasn’t any sort of dream at all..!
Carefullyslowlymaybealittleunsurely, the hand that was resting on Yamagawa’s neck slid lower, slipping under the collar to brush the skin there. There was drywetsticky blood everywhere, but…but the part under the shirtclothes was still…still not bloody and it felt…it felt…nicewarmsmoothprettywarmwarmhotnotbloodywarm and he liked…he liked touching it, liked touching Yamagawa, because Yamagawa was…was special precioustotouch and he made Kiba feel like it was okay to touch him, like Kiba wasn’t dirtydarkemptynothingess which was a good feeling…like Kiba wouldn’t sully Yamagawa’s perfectprettyness and it was just okay…and Kiba…Kiba liked that feeling, liked it and never wanted it to disappear…
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 3:08 am
He.. He felt warm.
The warmth was spreading through his body, from his lipsneckchest places where Kiba was touching him wantingneedingkissing him and it somehow someway hedidn'tknowwhy but it did it gave him this sort of pattering sort of warmgoldenglow inside him, brighter than anything brighter even than the glowingburningsparkling ambercoal inside his body because Kiba was touching him not because Yamagawa wanted him to touch him, not because otherselfvoice wanted him to touch but because Kiba wanted and it was Kiba's hand on his chest pressing against his ribcageheart feeling his heartbeat.
Yamagawa could feel the soft pressure of the other's hand, the sparklytingly glowing warmth eminating out from the simple touch and it was so good nice warm and didn't make him cold and made him not lonelyalone because.. because he could feel that Kiba was here with him could feel Kiba's touches and so.. so as long as he could feel Kiba touching him, then.. then it meant that Kiba wasn't going anywhere right?
The last bit of iceicycoldness melted evaporated fell away into palesmoky nothingness insignificant and light disappearing as the redhead practically meltedmoulded against Kiba's form and against the touch intimateclosewarmgentlehot on his skin, Kiba's fingers brushing against his and.. and Kiba actually positibly really did want to touch him touch Yamagawa reallyreallyreally right? Because maybe right now he likedlovedneeded those softgentle touches, needed them needed to feel that.. that maybe he wasn't nothing because nobody wanted to touch nothing and Kiba's touches made him feel warm which was something definitely something..
His hand --blood crustydried caked over the palmfingers still raw and stinging slightly but he didn'tcare-- slid down once more along the green haired male's back, pressing down gentlysoftly along each curveknocks in the spine, wantingneedingcraving sosososovery much to fee Kiba feel him just like the way that he was feeling Yamagawa and.. and they were sososoveryclose needed to be closer..
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 3:13 am
The. Redhead. Would. Die.
How dare he? How dare he hang onto Kiba like that, his Kiba, and not let him go What...what nerve! The dark snake stormed down the hall, the callerbeepermessengerthing a hunk of twisted plastic and circutry in his hands. Ignoring the people who quickly slid out of his way --no one wanted to risk his wrath-- he stormed towards his office. At least he'd be able to get rid of some of this angerbuiltuprage and regain his head. It was just so nice to hear screaming.
Zanis entered his office with a bang, slamming the door open hard enough that it hit the wall, left a dent, and rebounded shut again, automatically latching locked. He chucked the remains of the beeperdevicestupidstupidstupidthing into a corner, not even turning his head to watch it land. Ignoring --for the moment-- the experiment strapped to the table, he stalked over to one of the cabinets --stupidrundowndirtythings-- and pulled the door open, nearly ripping the door off its hinges. Stupidstupidstupid!
After a moment's consideration, he pulled out a long, thin knife with a serrated edge. He couldn't remember this one, but it was pretty and he wanted to use it now. He turned towards the table --then stopped short, grip convulsing on the knife.
A zombie. They brough him a ******** zombie. Had he not been so angry at the stupid redhead, he probably would have smelled it the second he walked into the room. How the hell was he supposed to kill a zombie? He killed experiments --on his own terms-- and he couldn't kill someone who was dead! ******** a sound, Zanis stormed the table, bringing the point of the knife down to burrow into the table --ooh, sharp knife-- through the zombie's stomach, of course. No point in burrowing if there wasn't some flesh to go through, dead or not. But the splash of blood meant nothing, nothing because the zombie didn't so much as whimper, and what was the point of torturing something if they didn't react the right way?
"Dammit!"
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 10:51 am
"...." Pale white eyes regarded the newcomer -- owner of this room, no boubt, and therefore the caller for this.. ah, appointment. Strange, that. He.. Butter had seen this person around, just a few times, never paid any attention, never looked too closely, but as it was in cases like this, the information --not much, but enough-- tended to trickle out down inside his head without him even noticing it.
Butter merely frowned up at the male, the rest of his features impassive and cold, before his eyes --dotspalerimmedblankness-- moved over disinterestedly nd stopping at the blade --or more like the hilt of the blade-- stabbed through his stomach inside him, the sluggish blood trikling down the pale skin in red rivulvets.
"..Evidently. You weren't expecting something like me, then." Was his quiet remark, his lips twitching slightlymaybe into something not quite like amusement but something very close like it. For a person that wasn't really living anymore, that is. Another slight creaking broke the pause as he considered the next relevant sort of thing to say.
He seemed pretty angry, Butter finally concluded. Angry and frustrated and just just so angry that he could feel the heat positively radiating off the other and one of his hands --one that was closest to the other-- twitched a little, strap digging into the pale flesh. The blankwhite eyes looked up at the other again, rather boredly inspecting the sharp features of the male's face. "..Maybe they thought bringing your very own tear-apartable super-silent zombie thing to work off your frustration upon was a good idea."
After a moment --a slight pause-- of silence, Butter added, more as a half-hearted afterthought than anything else. "..I could scream, if you'd like."
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 4:01 pm
Zanis just glared at the zombie, grip tightening on the handle of the blade, though the handle didn't break. Whatever it was, the people here knew his tendancy to break things, that was for sure. Especially small, grippable things that were easy to take hold of, like kinfe handles and bones.
Hmm...bones...
He eyes flickered slightly thoughtfully at the idea before he dismissed it. No use breaking bones if all he would get was a mockery of any sort of pain. Glowering almost childishly without even realizing he was, he stepped back, setting his hands on his hips and scanning the bound specimen. It wasn't faaair. He couldn't have any fun with a zombie. Zombies didn't feel pain. How was he supposed to make this experimentspecimenthing cryscreambreak if he didn't even feel anything?
After a long moment, he turned, gliding over to a different set of ratty cabinets. "Scream and I'll rip your voice box out," he warned. If it wasn't real, then he didn't want to hear any screams. What was the point of screams if they weren't real, full of fearhurtingpaindespair. Those were screams, and they couldn't just be...offered like that.
Really, what were those people thinking? The zombie had a point, stupid people, probably thinking that some sort of stress punchingbag was a good idea, but without ant screams it didn't work. How could he get rid of his frustrationangerannoyance if there weren't any screams?
"So am I supposed to stitch you up or what?" he questioned blandly, pulling from his pocket exactly two vials with a purply-mauvish-reddish colored smoke swirling inside. He wasn't quite sure what they were for, but he had found them in some other doctor --or maybe an assisstant's-- desk and had wanted them. So he took them. They were pretty.
He turned again, giving a full, searching look at the zombie. "Honestly, what am I supposed to do with you now?" If he couldn't make the thing scream, the Zanis really had no use for it, but if someone had sent the thing here it meant that the thing probably wasn't wanted anymore. That was his job, after all. But how do you kill something that's already dead?
Or...it could very well be that they just wanted him occupied with something that wouldn't die.
But where was the fun in that?
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 5:08 pm
It was strange. How could just one touch elicit such a wash of colorsfeelingwarmthbrightness, just one little touch? And it wasn’t Yamagawa hadn’t touched him before. But…but the strange thing was that the touches on his spine, lightcarefulgentle as they were, sent a swarm of exploding lightsdaggersspears that hurtburnedfiery but it wasn’t all the way hurting, it was…it was hurting but it was a good hurting too. Like…like before, before when there had been a good kind of hurting and he had likeditwantedit and this was like that. The…hurting niceness that Yamagawa was doing –how? It was just a touch—he wanteditwanteditwantedit because it was hurting but it was good and andand it was Yamagawa so…so it was even better goodness…
Moaning slightly at the feeling –and the wanting the feeling incurred—Kiba felt his bones turning to jelly, melting up against Yamagawa and Yamagawa melted against him and they were both just a messy melted mess but it was good because they weren’t apartlonelycold theywerewarm and it was god, even the hurtingnice daggersparks that shouldn’t hurt but did, why did they hurt? They shouldn’t hurt, everything was feeling so nice that nothing should be hurting, nothing should ever hurt never ever again because it was just so good.
His hand slid up to the other’s hair, twiningtwistingwinding in the pretty crimson locks, his other hand still resting over Yamagawa’s heart. The…the beatingpulsingwarmth was trembling up his arm, he could feel it, and it was almost like his own heart was meeting the rhythm and matching it and it was a nice idea, that their hearts were beating together as one beat. Of course, there was the distinct possibility that it was just his own pulse flashing through his body and pounding past his ears that he was hearing, but it was so much prettier to think that they were together, really together, even in something so simple as their pulse being that same.
Probably just a nice dream, but Kiba so very much wanted it to be true. He…he needed Yamagawa, because Yamagawa banished all the icycolddarkness away and mae the glowyemberlights glow warm and not dead and he wanted to believe sososoverymuch that this was true even though he couldn’t actually really tell. It was just so hard to know what Yamagawa was really thinkingfeelingwanting, and maybe Kiba likedlovedneeded Yamagawa, but maybe Yamagawa didn’t feel that way about Kiba and what if that happened? If that happened then he’d rather this was all just a beautiful dream, because if Yamagawa didn’t want him –even though he had asked Kiba to stay but there was still that chance—then he wanted the warmkissingtouching to be a dream that he never woke up from.
Of course he wanted this to be real. Nothing more would make him happier. But he wasn’t sure, he didn’t know if Yamagawa wanted him in the same way Kiba did, if Yamagawa wanted Kiba as a ‘something else’ too, and he had to at least safeguard against the worst outcome because Kiba knew he wouldn’t take it if Yamagawa left, couldn’t take it. So even though he was wishinghopingpraying that this was real, that Yamagawa really wanted him too, he still had to leave an out because he didn’t know and not knowing was just…not knowing was so bad…
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 6:17 pm
Voice box. Hm.
The zombie didn't give any reply to the maliciousdangerousangry remark, instead choosing to stare boredly at the dent in the wall that the door had left. Voice box.. Nobody had ever done that before. Seemed an interesting idea... as long as whoever it was that did it put it back, of course. And.. His eyes paleness flickered over to the other's form, jut a blurry figure on the edge of his vision --with the straps and all, he could only see so much-- and Butter shrugged mentally. And this person wasn't very likely to do that. So far, he wasn't so high up in Butter's list.
All in all, this wasn't turning out to be such exciting after all. Apart from the knife-stabbing-blood-thing and the coldsticky feel of it soaking down around his skin. Didn't really make any difference though; it wasn't like it would kill him. There was only one thing that could possibly maybe do that, and he wasn't about to tell it to this scientist-doctor-person-angry-thing. Why give him free easy rein?
Besides, Butter didn't much like the idea of.. of dying by that. If he had to die at all.
Another squeakstrain sound of leather was the answer, as the pale zombie shrugged difficultly. What was he to know on what they decided? They told him to come here, they took him here, strapped him down, and left. No instructions, no advice, no nothing. They didn't even tell him what was wrong with him. Apart from being dead --but not dead-- of course. "Beats me. I guess you can do anything you want.."
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Posted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 6:43 pm
He wasn't sure what this was, wasn't sure whether if this was right or wrong but it coudlnt' shouldn't be wrong because this felt good and good things should ever be wrong because nothing wrong could ever ever feel right feel goodniceawesometinglygood like this. And what Kiba was doing to him touchingfeelingkissingpressingmelting against Yamagawa's body couldn't ever be wrong because he knew wrong feelings and this wasn't one of it. Wrong feelings were slimy and cold and darkdarkdark and made shivers --bad shivers-- break out on your skin quite much like the half-murkyhiddendark memory of that silentlaughterdarkroom and the glint of metal and the sharppainstingcrying brought him, and.. and it was just wrong sort of feeling that he got when he saw.. when they saw the other personsnakething, the offness, the.. the feeling that heit was somehow.. somehow stale and wrooong..
But this wasn't it. This feeling --whatever it was-- that Kiba was making him feel, it wasn't wrong wrong feeling. It was too tingly, too brightsparkly golden and just too damn warm to be ever wrong ever bad like those otherbad memories too many of them that the redhead had. And it couldn't be wrong because it felt good in a burningfierymelting sort of way that made him slide an arm around the green haired man's neck almost desperatelywantingly, and.. and bad feelings never wanted never made him want to be closecloser to the person the offbadness and that was what Yamagawa wanted right now to get close to get closer and more and more wanting more of the warmth and the good fieryamberglowingness..!
And.. and if he just continued if he just continued keeping Kiba here, and not anywhere else and just made him made them feel warmsparklyglowy inside-- because.. because that windingslender fingers in his hair felt good, even though it wasn't anything unusual because he did that often every day but.. but the fact that it was Kiba's fingers and not his not a brush just Kiba somehow took that feeling and magnified it tens of thousands of times and whole whole more bit pleasurable that Yamagawa could never have imagined hairthing to feel, and.. and maybe it was just the warmfire or maybe it was just Kiba because Yamagawa's whole body felt like that, felt so magnifiedsensitivegoooood in.. in whatever whichever shooting-star feelings that he was feeling whether it was the wantingburningwantingneeding desirething to.. to touch Kiba back, touchbrush against the milkywhitecreamysmooth skin that was Kiba and.. and just feel Kiba's heartbeat under his hand under his skin because that would be sosososomuch hundredths of thousandths of times bettereven more than.. than this awesomelyblindingly good feeling..
His fingersarms around Kiba's neck brushed against --wantingtremblingneeding more of the warmthtouchkisses-- the softsmooth underside of the male's chin, almost jerking in surpriseshock as the electrical boltsomething shot up through his arm, jumping at the contact form Kiba to him and even though that was a sortofmaybe pain thing, it was good and.. and he wanted more..!
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Posted: Tue Oct 24, 2006 3:18 pm
Zanis pouted again, crossing his arms sulkily in front of him. "That's the thing. I can't do what I want because you don't feel pain." And what good was torturing smething if they didn't feel it? Honestly, what was the point? The only reason he had even come to this stupid place full of its stupid people was --besides Kiba-- because there were lots of little useless experiments people wanted 'disposed' of that he could toy with.
You couldn't do that with zombies.
Muttering some annoyed incoherance under his breath, he stalked back to the table, gripping the handle of the knife and pulling it out with much less force than had been used sticking it in. Whatever rage he had borne --while probably going to explode at the next sight of either Kiba or the redhead-- had simmered down to a chilled iciness now that there was nothing to aim his anger at.
He held the blade up, turning it under the lights, almost like he was studying a fascinating bug. Who knew that zombies could bleed...? "What do they call you?" Not good. Names humanized them, why was he wanting to know the thing's name? But...he couldn't help asking, somehow, in a strange way.
Curiously, he brought the knife edge to his lips, tongue darting out to lap at the blood, eyes staring down over the metal at the prone experiment.
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Posted: Tue Oct 24, 2006 5:51 pm
Was it wrong, to want Yamagawa so much? He had wanted Zanis like this, he remembered, once upon a time ago, but…but this, here, wanting Yamagawa, it didn’t feel as dirty as wanting Zanis had. Maybe part of it was simply because Yamagawa wasn’t family, but it felt strange even to that, something… ‘something else’. Like…like it was okay to want Yamagawa’s touchtastesmellfeel so much, so desperately, like everything would be okay and this glowingstrangewarmth would keep going and it wouldn’t be a problem. Kiba had never felt that before, that it was okay to want someone, but…but with Yamagawa…with Yamagawa it did. He felt fine with the feeling, embraced it, really, sinking into the wantingneed and letting it slip out just a fraction in a low, desperate moan, fingers tightening his hold on Yamagawa’s hair. Not enough to hurt, just a slight tugging.
He jumped slightly at the touch on his neck, partly because he still didn’t know which Yamagawa this was and was a little wary of being hurt again, and partly because of the spark of fieryelectricstuff that slithered down his spinal cord, making him meltmold even further against the redhead. The snake shifted slightly, pretty much straddling Yamagawa’s lap in a frantic, slightlymorethandesperate attempt to one, get closer and two, keep Yamagawa here.
Because…if Yamagawa was here…then…then the glowysparklewarmth wouldn’t have to stop, and Kiba could feel safe and not empty. Even the knowledge that Zanis was here, was trying to get him back, somehow just sort of…of faded away into a pleasantly fuzzy fog. Why should he care if Zanis was in the labs, or if Chou-chan was still in the room? It didn’t matter. Just…the most important thing to do right now was to just keep Yamagawa here and keep this glowing warmth and love him and it would be fine.
Wait. Love him? Kiba’s tongue, still traversing Yamagawa’s mouth, faltered slightly at the revelation. Did he…did he love Yamagawa? He…what did that mean? Sure, he knew Yamagawa was a ‘something else’, but…but that didn’t mean he loved the other doctor, did it? Even…even though Yamagawa was the only one who made the glowygoodwarmth burn inside of the snake, made him feel safe, made him feel not dirty for wanting him, wanting this, wanting everything that had to do with Yamagawa. But…but did that mean that…that he loved Yamagawa? He…he definitely liked Yamagawa…but was it love? And if it wasn’t, why had the word popped into his head?
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Posted: Tue Oct 24, 2006 8:50 pm
If he could, Butter would have smiled. If he could. Almost. The pout on the other's face was just too.. too off, too out of place here, here in the dark dank room, here here, in a situation that wasn't at all innocent or good, that it would have been hilarious to behold. If he could still feel. But he couldn't, and all the sight brought him was a faint memory or sorts of.. of being feeling like that, once. Too long to remember. All in general, a curious feeling of de ja vu.
And as it was, Butter only stared at the other impassively when the knife slid free of his insides with a slickwet sliding noise, with another fresh gurgle of blood. The doctor seemed.. colder. Calmer. Which was good with Butter, because being cold was good --at least, better than being burningblisteringwarm-- and he was fine with that. At least this doctor person-thing seemed almost in control of his strength, now. But.. A vague frown crossed his features as his colourless eyes glanced down at the thin deep cut-stabbed-wound in his stomach.
Blood.
He never particularly liked the sight of blood, his own blood. Not that it made him queasy, as such, but it was a sharp reminder every time he saw the sluggish slow flow of blood that he couldn’t feel. He never felt the stinging pain, never felt the warmth of the blood, never couldn't ever feel anything. Not that he.. particularly minded not feeling at this moment, strapped down to a table with.. with this person, who was licking the blood off the knife and.. and... his own blood was being licked off.
"..Butter." An eyebrow arched up slightly, as he tilted his head a little. "What do they call you?"
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Posted: Wed Oct 25, 2006 2:28 am
It shouldn't ever feel this good to touch Kiba. It shouldn't ever feel this good to touch another person like this so close the heat almost seeming to burn Yamagawa burning inside him charring his skin his fingers off. It shouldn't feel this good, even though Yamagawa liked loved wanted cherished the feeling, even though it was good sosososo very much goodbetterbest than feeling badoffness or even feeling nothing at all. Because if you felt nothing then you were a nothing a noone a nobody to everyone and being warmhotmeltingsparkly inside was so very much newawesomebetter than feeling nothing at all.
And it felt good to touch Kiba. It felt better than good, too good too warm too pleasurable that it felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest out of his skin --beatingsofast-- and it felt like his blood was burningchurning whitebrighthot lights shedding warm glow everywhereeverywhere andand.. and it should hurt it should because it was burning and burnings shouldn’t feel this good this hotironbranding feeling shouldn't feel good at all but it was and.. and Yamagawa was more than slightly scared.
He was scared, even as he tightened his arm --fabric sliding against fabric-- that was around Kiba's waist and pulled the other male down closer against him meltingslippingmolding together needing to be together and not apart and never apart because Kiba couldn’t go nononono Yamagawa wasn't going to let him go not ever-- even as the redhead gasped shallowly against the other's mouth eyesclosinghazy mouth openingslackingnice wanting moremore of the feel of Kiba the touchtastesmell of Kiba all around insidearoundoutside him, Yamagawa was sosososovery scared he was shaking softly his fingers shaking softly as they trailed back around --carefulcarefulslowgentlecareful-- to wrap around tangling in the green locks of hair much in the fashion as the other male's in his own red ones.
Because.. Because this was too good and when Kiba said he would leave, that was baaaaad and bad things made Yamagawa go away --he vaguely knew he was going away; everything seemed murkyunderwaterhazy-- and.. and that thing before, that beforeness when Kiba said that he will go, go away and not come back not be here with him ever, that had hurt had hurt sooo much and.. and now it was too good andandand so.. so it was too bad and too good and maybegood maybebad but not really and.. and it was so much feeling so many different so much different extremes that was all too new to Yamagawa, that.. that it was almost almost ceasing to be a part of reality at all. It just all seemed like his dreams, even though this felt real, Kiba felt real against him under him around him inside him, it was just.. just too mixed..!
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