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 Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 5:01 pm
I would like to basically repeat Page 1, in that we have some wonderful people who have just joined Dreamed Integrity, and I would like to personally welcome them here to this thread and start it out with a wonderful poem.     When a person is being diagnosed for the first time, I feel a person starts thinking, "Why me"? "What have I done"? There is a real grieving period that follows a real loss, a loss of a healthy organ or a loss of a healthy body and this can be very painful. As most of you know- pain has a way of showing itself on your face. It doesn't need an announcement that it is here.
But in any form of pain, (chronic or not--but mostly chronic), there has to be a wonderful way to express your emotions. Sometimes when you're not feeling well, it's hard to talk about it, or hard to express to your friends and family exactly how you feel. But more importantly it's good to have an outlet for your feelings....Perhaps you can keep a daily journal, or now-a-days, because we're in the age of computers, keeping a blog on living with chronic pain. Getting these feelings out in a direct way is very positive and can help you when you look back, even from a month ago, and see how you are progressing or .... regressing.(All of us here are) : With all of that said... I would like to introduce a few people who have just joined Dreamed Integrity, and perhaps will say nothing in this thread, but I have encouraged each and every one of these people to at least read the posts. I want them to know that this is a place where no one will judge you, but accept you for who you are and to empower you with yes, you can speak your mind VERY freely here. I don't feel it necessary to actually announce their names. But, they know who they are. It's not for me to say. 
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 5:04 pm
Godsbabybear Hi i want to be a part of your guild i am coming back from 7 days of heck i get so tired of being sick i don't get down much but OMG!!!!!! i have been so down i am 46 and have been sick well i think i was around 13 i have fibromyalgia, rsd it has been some hard times most of my family never believed me i am married for 26 years to a very good man who tries to help but i am sure he gets tired of it too his family never believed me either till one of there kids got it know it is real and know my brother has it so know it is real gets old but i still pray for them all my sister was the only one that i had to talk too god rest her sole she got really sick first and had RSD all through her body and at age 40 her body just could not take any more i have 3 awesome kids but i am at the point that i just can't stand to be me any more i feel so bad i feel like i am so nasty all the time and i hate it i thank you so much for being here and waiting on me this is a very hard thing to do for me all i can do is cry and type after my sister passed my mother was not long after her so i have my daddy and 2 brothers i have a shunt in my head i only had to do that 5 times for them to get it right i live in NC Fayetteville i hope to talk to all of you at some point i have met a few really good friends on here i used to be able to help others but have been off more then on  It's so nice to have you with us. Welcome to Hug Soft, Love Strong.
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 5:25 pm
Xx The Dark Angel Bolide64 I am present!What is wrong?
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 5:27 pm
While I do not have chronic pain my daughter does due to a spinal defect. When she was 9 we took her to a orthopedist for dislocated hips and he asked her if she hurt - she looked at me funny and said "Aren't I supposed to?" My heart broke on the spot and I became much more aware of her body language than I had been before. Her pain isn't quite as bad now as it was then but I know that she still has some really bad days. My mother suffered with fibromyalgia for years and no one believed it. I tried to be as supportive as I could while I had her - hard to do when you are over 700 miles apart. I also have a husband who has Hepatitis C which is incurable and he is a non-responder to the current treatments - he also has more bad days than good but we try to enjoy the time we have left.
With all that said I offer gentle hugs to all who have chronic pain. You are not alone and it is NOT in your head. Hope to talk to you all more.
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 5:33 pm
angelbaskets While I do not have chronic pain my daughter does due to a spinal defect. When she was 9 we took her to a orthopedist for dislocated hips and he asked her if she hurt - she looked at me funny and said "Aren't I supposed to?" My heart broke on the spot and I became much more aware of her body language than I had been before. Her pain isn't quite as bad now as it was then but I know that she still has some really bad days. My mother suffered with fibromyalgia for years and no one believed it. I tried to be as supportive as I could while I had her - hard to do when you are over 700 miles apart. I also have a husband who has Hepatitis C which is incurable and he is a non-responder to the current treatments - he also has more bad days than good but we try to enjoy the time we have left. With all that said I offer gentle hugs to all who have chronic pain. You are not alone and it is NOT in your head. Hope to talk to you all more.  Thank you for making that wonderful post. I want everyone to read the top post on Page 20. This thread will be growing and growing before you know it. lol I just wanted everyone to know that more members, including you, have been welcomed into the thread with welcomed arms. God bless you........~boldie
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 5:53 pm
i want to thank you so much all i can do is cry thank you for knowing what i am going through and how i feel and that some days i just don't want to talk or be happy or go out or do any thing i am so glad that you invited me and thank you so much nerilaith for being a great friend and asking to invite me in the guild and for trying to help me catch up with every thing i have missed on gaia you are such a kind person thank you all
big huggles
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 8:18 pm
thank you so much for this! <3
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 9:10 pm
I live in Raleigh, North Carolina and I am 17 years old. Today has been a bad day... Bad two months actually... I keep getting worse. My pain and fatigue has been so bad that I have been laying in bed sleeping for most of the past two months. I have been sick for 4 years, the pain did not start until 2 years ago.
I am undiagnosed still, but I most likely have EDS and Fibromyalgia among other things. I am always tired, back pain, sensitive to touch, dizziness, OCD, ADD, poor circulation, orthostatic hypotension, sore throats, hot flashes, a suppressed immune system and those are just the worst things. I am extremely flexible to the point of ribs and vertebrae coming out of place and it is extremely painful. My tissues are so sensitive that my muscles flare up and become inflamed when a joint is out of place making it harder to fix and twice as painful. I do not have a diagnosis so they will not give me pain medicine. I am so glad I am homeschooled, because I would never be able to go to a regular school. My dream has always been to be a veterinarian, but I don't know if that will happen, I doubt it will. Especially surgery which is what I wanted because I shake too much. If I even made it through college I don't think I will ever be able to stand up all day... Or be awake all day. I don't fall asleep until around 3am and don't wake up until 1pm. It takes my mom over an hour to wake me up.
Last week I went to a new doctor that has given us hope, she is with the Fibromyalgia and Fatigue Centers of America. It will be alot of blood drawn, shots, IV's, and other not so fun stuff but I am praying it will help. Anything to help me live again. I have no friends. Not because they did not try, but because they have to live their own life getting school done, work done, preparing for college. I have my mom and my boyfriend and even they can't understand completely.
I used to sit in my bathtub crying for it to be over, holding my razor or knife, but I never had it in me to go through with it.
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bittersweet and evocative
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 9:29 pm
Wow - so many more posts since I was last here! For those who don't know me, I have lost the majority of my vision, so when posting here I would really appreciate it if you could make your font size a little bigger >< Thank you!
My name is Ailsa, by the way. (lots of you know me, but you know, I just thought I'd say it XD I haven't been around much lately because pain has gotten worse and it's official: my CRPS has spread. It sucks. But I'm off to finish my composition - if all goes ok, then I'll post it up on youtube - it's basically about my life with pain. Ugh, and then I'll probably crash. Boldie - I'm trying to last, I really am. I'll be replying to your PM now.
xx Ailsa xx
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Posted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 10:03 pm
bittersweet and evocative Wow - so many more posts since I was last here! For those who don't know me, I have lost the majority of my vision, so when posting here I would really appreciate it if you could make your font size a little bigger >< Thank you!
My name is Ailsa, by the way. (lots of you know me, but you know, I just thought I'd say it XD I haven't been around much lately because pain has gotten worse and it's official: my CRPS has spread. It sucks. But I'm off to finish my composition - if all goes ok, then I'll post it up on youtube - it's basically about my life with pain. Ugh, and then I'll probably crash. Boldie - I'm trying to last, I really am. I'll be replying to your PM now.
xx Ailsa xx
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A_Wolf_Drowning_In_Blood Crew
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Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 8:36 am
Hey, ya'll!!! It's nice to have some new people so that maybe we can all start over our conversations. Start new and improved! Or whatever...
Well, I am Lindsy. I myself am also 17, and like Ailsa, I have lost much of my vision. (I'm blind in my left eye) I live in Kentucky. I have a lot of pets including horses... and I don't have complete Chronic Pain, but I do have many problems of my own.
AliciaLeone:: I also have a boyfriend!!! But fortuante for me, he understands. Or, at least he pretends to. (He must be a good actor!!!)
A vet!!! I "work" at the local veterinaery (Can't spell all to well...) hospital!!! When I say "work", I mean that i help out since I am not actually quailfied to be a vet myself. I pretty much do what a Vet Tech would do, minus the surgery prep, and stuff. I clean out cages, feed and water, and sometimes exercise the recovering animals.
I know that I am not a good example and am pretty much a hypocrit when I say this, but:: Don't cut yourself!!! You, you can't do that! It really isn't worth your time. Don't do it. GRRR!!! I will send my wolves after you!!!
Ailsa:: What boldie said about "checking-out" gave me an idea for this post.
Life is like a Hotel. Usually you check-in into one. Sometimes, when you are ill, the hotel is nasty, infested, and breaking down. What you need to do is check-out of that hotel, and QUICKLY check back in into a nice, fancy, expensive hotel. Being there will make you feel good and healthy again.
What I am trying to say is this~~ Pretend that life is at least half as good as you want it to be.
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Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 12:15 pm
Godsbabybear i want to thank you so much all i can do is cry thank you for knowing what i am going through and how i feel and that some days i just don't want to talk or be happy or go out or do any thing i am so glad that you invited me and thank you so much nerilaith for being a great friend and asking to invite me in the guild and for trying to help me catch up with every thing i have missed on gaia you are such a kind person thank you all big huggles  Thank you so much for coming and bringing forth what's on your mind. You are always welcomed. But I thank you from the bottom of my heart that you are here.
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Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 12:19 pm
Gin-Gin_version2 thank you so much for this! <3
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Posted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 12:24 pm
A_Wolf_Drowning_In_Blood Hey, ya'll!!! It's nice to have some new people so that maybe we can all start over our conversations. Start new and improved! Or whatever...
Well, I am Lindsy. I myself am also 17, and like Ailsa, I have lost much of my vision. (I'm blind in my left eye) I live in Kentucky. I have a lot of pets including horses... and I don't have complete Chronic Pain, but I do have many problems of my own.
AliciaLeone:: I also have a boyfriend!!! But fortuante for me, he understands. Or, at least he pretends to. (He must be a good actor!!!)
A vet!!! I "work" at the local veterinaery (Can't spell all to well...) hospital!!! When I say "work", I mean that i help out since I am not actually quailfied to be a vet myself. I pretty much do what a Vet Tech would do, minus the surgery prep, and stuff. I clean out cages, feed and water, and sometimes exercise the recovering animals.
I know that I am not a good example and am pretty much a hypocrit when I say this, but:: Don't cut yourself!!! You, you can't do that! It really isn't worth your time. Don't do it. GRRR!!! I will send my wolves after you!!!
Ailsa:: What boldie said about "checking-out" gave me an idea for this post.
Life is like a Hotel. Usually you check-in into one. Sometimes, when you are ill, the hotel is nasty, infested, and breaking down. What you need to do is check-out of that hotel, and QUICKLY check back in into a nice, fancy, expensive hotel. Being there will make you feel good and healthy again.
What I am trying to say is this~~ Pretend that life is at least half as good as you want it to be.
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