Welcome to Gaia! ::

This is wonderful you guys. All the stories are very interesting! It just shows ya love is truly a complicated thing and it doesn't happen the same way for everyone... but it does seem to come out of unexpected places. Please keep posting, in doing so I feel like I'm getting to know you all a little bit better heart plus these stories are wonderful, even the sadder ones because I know I can relate to a few.

let me answer thios a little more in depth. i am sorry ahead of time. i dont know if it will make sence.

alright so about 3 years ago i met someone online. he was a friend of an ex boyfriend. i was always warned about him and how much of a ******** up he was. now i am not one to believe everyone is like that. i like to take in the ones that have no one and be their friend. show them that love is really out there. anyways..so we start to talking and after a month or so we decide to engage in a relationship. and plan in 6 months, if we are still togeather we will meet. he lives in IL and i live in CA. but i knew my dad was going to a computer convention in 6 months so i would go with him. needless to say he and i were still togeather. so i went and saw him and vistited for a good week. everything was perfect. kissing him was like freedom. as corny as it sounds...its how i felt. it was my frist taste of love.
well after a year or so of us going back and forth this is where something very wrong happend. he came down for comic con. i was so happy. he had come down last year for it and it was perfect then. but this time my parents paid for us to take the train and go to disneyland while he was here. so we went and had an amazeing time. it was a girly dream of mine to go to disneyland with a boyfriend. and i had a great time. where it went wrong was on the train home. i was tired as hell from running around all day so i dozed off. i kept remembering moveing around alot in my sleep but i have never been that restless. i finaly woke up when i felt alot of pressure on my back. i open my eyes only to see him on top of me with a hand down my pants and one up my shirt and kissing me....i have never been so scared in my life. i relized why i had been so restless...he had been manipulateing my body so he could molest me....my boyfriend of almost two years had taken advantage of me...

i never pressed charges...i did even worse....i got back togeather with him...we went back and forth again and i went back for the last time last october. i gave myself to him. the only man i have ever been with...i broke up with him the last day i was there...i couldnt do it anymore...

i have been single since then. and i cant tell if i am lonely...or numb....kinda pathetic isnt it..

yeah it happens.