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 Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 7:25 pm
AkureiKnight rurica AkureiKnight Yah, and I guess I still fight to be the "buch" in a relationship. I feel that it's my duty to take care of and to romance my love. But in alot of other ways Im still also the female. But I guess everyone in a girl + girl relationship feels those differences of roles. *nods* See, in my relationship, I would be the "lipstick lesbian" and my girl would be the "boy." She really hates those kinds of stereotypes, so we really don't reffer to them at all. It is confusing though because, sometimes she wants to lead the dance, sometimes I do, sometimes with both do, and sometimes neither of us. It takes a lot of confidence I think to sustain a homosexual relationship. Generally, you have to be pretty secure in yourself. yah, Im learning that now sweatdrop This is my first relationship with a girl, my second relationship I've had ever. So.. yah I have my problems. This is my frist relationship with a girl as well ^_^ Sure does take some...working through whee
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Posted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 11:02 pm
rurica AkureiKnight rurica AkureiKnight Yah, and I guess I still fight to be the "buch" in a relationship. I feel that it's my duty to take care of and to romance my love. But in alot of other ways Im still also the female. But I guess everyone in a girl + girl relationship feels those differences of roles. *nods* See, in my relationship, I would be the "lipstick lesbian" and my girl would be the "boy." She really hates those kinds of stereotypes, so we really don't reffer to them at all. It is confusing though because, sometimes she wants to lead the dance, sometimes I do, sometimes with both do, and sometimes neither of us. It takes a lot of confidence I think to sustain a homosexual relationship. Generally, you have to be pretty secure in yourself. yah, Im learning that now sweatdrop This is my first relationship with a girl, my second relationship I've had ever. So.. yah I have my problems. This is my frist relationship with a girl as well ^_^ Sure does take some...working through whee lol Yah.. especially since me and my girl have a long distance relationship. sweatdrop Im now taking time to myself untill Friday so I can think of things to talk about. We dont talk about much of anything online. I just do some weird rpg thing like (does a lil dance) to make her laugh.. so yah, Im searching for things to talk about XD
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Posted: Thu Jun 23, 2005 10:44 pm
I've been feeling "it" my entire life, but when I was a little kid, I felt nervous, like someone was watching my thoughts. Since puberty, I've finally realised I am gay and have been looking around on the forums (the have a lot of advice) and realize why I am. It's only a feeling you can really have if you are gay, you know? I mean, I am attracted to guys becuase I want someone who can be compassionate, yet I am not really interested in females. sweatdrop It really is hard to be gay, I mean, I haven't came out to my friends, but I have told one of my friends who is bi, and she says its okay, so I think I will tell the rest of my friends and family! Wish me luck! heart
~ Patriach
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Posted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 8:27 pm
I wish you luck dude! 3nodding
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Posted: Fri Jun 24, 2005 10:16 pm
AkureiKnight rurica AkureiKnight rurica AkureiKnight Yah, and I guess I still fight to be the "buch" in a relationship. I feel that it's my duty to take care of and to romance my love. But in alot of other ways Im still also the female. But I guess everyone in a girl + girl relationship feels those differences of roles. *nods* See, in my relationship, I would be the "lipstick lesbian" and my girl would be the "boy." She really hates those kinds of stereotypes, so we really don't reffer to them at all. It is confusing though because, sometimes she wants to lead the dance, sometimes I do, sometimes with both do, and sometimes neither of us. It takes a lot of confidence I think to sustain a homosexual relationship. Generally, you have to be pretty secure in yourself. yah, Im learning that now sweatdrop This is my first relationship with a girl, my second relationship I've had ever. So.. yah I have my problems. This is my frist relationship with a girl as well ^_^ Sure does take some...working through whee lol Yah.. especially since me and my girl have a long distance relationship. sweatdrop Im now taking time to myself untill Friday so I can think of things to talk about. We dont talk about much of anything online. I just do some weird rpg thing like (does a lil dance) to make her laugh.. so yah, Im searching for things to talk about XD You know, come to think of it, any relationship is tough. Especially long distance.
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Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2005 2:05 pm
rurica You know, come to think of it, any relationship is tough. Especially long distance. Yes, I believe so. I have a friend going thru one now, and another friend warned me about them. But Im willing to try and make it work.. 3nodding
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Posted: Sun Jun 26, 2005 4:25 pm
When I was little I had 'crushes' on boys (all very effeminate) and thought I was straight, but in the back of my mind I'd always wonder what it would be like to be a lesbian. During the beginning of seventh grade I started thinking about all the girl I'd know, and how I always stopped to check out other women on the street and how I had a giant crush on a friend of mine (still do, it sucks) and I realized that I was bisexual. So a few months later I started going out with this guy. He was really nice and everything, in fact, we're still friends, but I didn't have any feelings for him at all, except platonically. I gradually discovered that this applied to all men, and I liked girl a lot. So now everything is okay and I'm a lesbian. heart
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Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2005 9:28 pm
Mine's not much of a story, I just found myself to be physically attracted to people of either gender. After a bit of experimenting I found myself to be Bi.
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Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2005 12:35 am
*giggles* Baka, yours sounds a lot like mine.
I have *always* loved girls, but I was terrified of being a Lesbian because my mom was a major homophobe and she passed that on to me. Well....I didn't know what bisexual was, so how could I know that it was possible to like boys and girls? I didn't >.< So, until I was 13, I had no idea, I just wrote it off and ignored it and tried to be normal.
Well, when I was 13, I met a friend in an online role-playing game, EverQuest, and he seemed really Gay. I asked him if he was, he said no. I found out from a mutual friend that he was bi (at least back then, he's fully gay now).....I also found out another friend in our group was bi. They were both boys, so I was a little skeptical if it was the same for girls, but I started thinking "maybe I am"..
I took a lot of online quizzes (like THAT can tell you if you're bi or not >.<)...and I was really scared. I never believed I could stand up for my sexuality like my friends did for theirs....so...while I kinda knew, I brushed it off quite a bit. I told my mom I was pretty sure I was, but she told me it was a phase (because I was only 13.....even though her two best friends who are like her brothers are a gay couple and she was no longer a homophobe at this point..), so I burried it....
Until about 6 months later, a few months after I turned 14, and I met some more firends online who were gay, bi, etc. I mean, there was a GROUP of like, 12 of us. We all met at OpenDiary, and we all just became great friends, and they really helped me come into my own and be "okay" with who I was. About four months after that, when I was about 14 and a half, I got shoved out of the closet (I didn't mean to come out) at school, and within 2 days, the ENTIRE TOWN knew. I was the first kid to EVER come out at my school. I got a lot of flaque for it, but I stood up for what I believed and really just took it as it came. I was amazed at myself, and I love myself much more for having the gutts to do so....
Anyways....move on to about 6 months after *that*.....I meet this girl online...and go fricking gaga over her. She's the only girl I've ever been in love with so far, though definately not the only one I've ever liked. But yeah...I was having a lot of problems with my first love who'd been playing with me for over a year and stuff so me and the girl didn't last long, but....we dated on and off and stuff for quite awhile....and she's my best friend now. When I told my mom about her, about a year and a few months after I originally came out to my mom, she finally accepted it... and that changed everything.
That was almost three years ago. My mom being accepting helped me accept it more and has really helped me come to grips with things. My mom is just awesome about it now and is very proud of me, which is one of the greatest things in the world. I swear to God, I wish every GLBT kid had a mom who supports them like my mom does me. It's so terrible that more people aren't open enough to love their children properly.
Anyways *cough* I'm getting ahead of myself....since those three years ago, I've changed a lot. I didn't even really figure things out until...around last summer. I knew but I was still really really confused. My first Pridefest, last June, is what really did it for me and helped me come to grips with it.
Since then, I've realized *why* boys never did it for me in school and why, I never really had normal crushes like other girls. I'm not really bi, so much as I am a lesbian who has the strange ability to be able to fall in love with men based on their personalities. I mean, men don't do it for me, really, but at the same time, my love for my boyfriend makes me attracted to him. It's hard to explain. I just say I'm 3/4 lesbian (^-^)
Anyways, does any of that make ANY sense!? O.O
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Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:46 pm
Ha ha, Mattie - yeah, it made OK sense whee
I realized another thing yesterday about when I was younger. I too never had the "normal" crushes, and everyonce in a while felt oddly attracted (not physically, emotionally) to women. I'm looking back and it has happened as early as 2nd grade, lol. My teacher xDDD
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Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2005 8:34 pm
Yes Mattie it makes sense. BTW you hake some the longest winded speeches I have ever heard.
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Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2005 8:46 pm
Tenaku Yes Mattie it makes sense. BTW you hake some the longest winded speeches I have ever heard. Hehehe, I like to explain things in detail....and besides, the longer your message is, the more Gold you get smile I rest my case.
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Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2005 8:54 pm
That's not neccessarily true.
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2005 5:17 pm
Well, this might or might not be long.
Edit, ended up being long. XD;
Okay, so from 3rd to about 5th grade, I liked this guy, and had a lot of guy friends. The reason might be that all the girls from my school were bitches, no offense. (Still are in my current school, I'm moving in a few months though! -dances-) Well, that guy, I don't think ever liked me back, so soon I just stopped talking to him because he was hurting me emotionally. I was a bit desperate for love and got an online boy friend, it ended up, he hurt me more. After a while, yeah, looking back I was really dumb, I got another online boy friend, didn't think about how much the first and second hurt me, well, the third just made me angry and made me think guys were just pig-headed bastards. Well, I got more and more girl friends at school, they were all so cool, but it ended up that they were either using me or making fun of me behind my back, or just plain annoying as hell. I think I realized when that annoying as hell girl told me she was bi, and I told her to stay away from me and never talk to me. She sent me to the guidance office, had a talk, I claimed I didn't hate her because she was bisexual. Well, I'm thinking about it now, and I really didn't. I would and could never love her anyway if I was actually how I am right now back then. But, then, that's when I started thinking about bisexual.. ness. Soon, I was bisexual, maybe just curious. Well, it turned out that I do, in fact, love women emotionally, mentally, and physically. I wondered if I could have the same kind of feelings for men, but no, I can't imagine myself having another boyfriend ever. Guys are still fun to hang out with though. ^^ Just the right ones. I haven't had a girlfriend yet, but I really do hope to when I go to my new school next year.
I am sure this is not because of a "phase", and I am sure this isn't because of youth or curiousity. I'm very proud to be who I am.
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Posted: Fri Oct 14, 2005 9:32 pm
Mine's not to long, but it is kinda wierd.
Practically my whole life, my mom's been pressuring me to do well in school, and i don't mean a's and b's, I mean Straight high a's. or house arrest without any electricty.
So, being as these high grades don't make themselves, I study all the time. In school, i always got made fun of for reading during lunch and break, and not just fun stuff, but stuff like, "The Art of War", and "War and Piece", all of the old historical books, and classic plays.
When I was in the sixth grade, having just moved down to South Carolina a year ago, I met a really nice guy, who shall not be named.
I was studying at his house, while he was playing on his computer, and due to stress, and lack of sleep, I passed out sweatdrop . When I woke up, it was nighttime, and I was in his bed(It was a Saturday, and I was sleeping over), with him practically snuggling up to me, so I did what anyone would have done. I snuggled back.
After that, i started to think about boys like that instead of girls,not that I had had time to think of girls at all, with the amount of work i had to do.
Sadly, I'm not exactly with him, though we remain close buddies.
It's really difficult to find an outed guy in South Carolina! evil
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