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 Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2006 5:37 am
I just spent 6 days at an adolescent psychiatry center (crazy house, loony bin, nut house, etc. etc.)
Anyways, the doctors and therapists there switched up my medications, and have now set up an appointment for a therapist in my town. Also, I have now be formally diagnosed with depression, along with my anxiety disorder.
So, let's all say "Cheers!" to brighter days. (or so I hope)
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Posted: Wed Nov 22, 2006 7:07 pm
Getting your life back in order is always a good thing, since you can control your mental illness instead of it controlling you. I am trying to work on the same thing. So far things are going ok (with a few minor problems).
So, since you said "cheers", I hold my invisible glass of....er....water...up for you. cool
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Posted: Thu Nov 23, 2006 4:33 pm
AraTeran Getting your life back in order is always a good thing, since you can control your mental illness instead of it controlling you. I am trying to work on the same thing. So far things are going ok (with a few minor problems). So, since you said "cheers", I hold my invisible glass of....er....water...up for you. cool Yes, it's always great knowing that you can handle the things in your life. Good luck on your journey as well, let's hope we all get our lives in order. heart
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Posted: Sat Dec 23, 2006 5:27 pm
List of random rants:
-I can't stop thinking about cutting myself, even though I haven't done it in a few weeks.
-Two teachers (I talked about my mental issues with both; I thought they cared) think I'm only an annoying twit and really don't give a s**t about me.
-I can't find a job!!!
-I afraid of the future, I'm scared shitless about graduating this year and going off to college.
-My depressed thoughts keep resurfacing.
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Posted: Tue Jan 02, 2007 7:06 am
"I am the girl you know,
can't look you in the eye.
...I am the girl you know
I lie, and lie, and lie." (Miss World by Hole)
I've decided since I annoy people when I talk about my mental disorders, I will no longer speak about it. I'll pretend like I'm happy, and basically just act the way they want me to. After all, it's better than being the annoying twit.
Lately my only close friend has been bothering me. She knows I'm really sensitive when it comes to boyfriends (especially since I've wanted one for the last 6 years). So what does she do? She takes me with her to go "shopping" when in reality it's just her going out with her boyfriend while I'm being the third wheel.
Then on New Year's she complains because only two of her boyfriends/lovers/whatever called her. I've never wanted to punch someone as much as did then, but she's my only good friend so there's not much I can do.
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Posted: Fri Jan 12, 2007 1:26 pm
Today was a really strange day for me, mentally.
I woke up feeling really depressed, then I felt confused. I mean extreme confusion, I almost thought I was going to the wrong class this morning. I kept pacing back and forth, and I couldn't think straight or concentrate on anything I was doing. Then this lead to feeling really depressed again, then I got really hyper after that.
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Posted: Wed Jan 24, 2007 5:09 pm
How am I supposed to cope?
I have absolutely no support from anyone:
I can only see my therapist about once a month, and even then I feel no connection to her (probably because I've only seen her once)
My teachers (who I used to talk to) seem like they don't care anymore, and I can't even ask them questions or hold a conversation with them.
My friends don't want to be bothered with my problems, and if I do bother them they think I'm just being dramatic.
I can't talk to my family because I'm ashamed of being depressed.
When I just want to cry and be hugged and told, "Everything will be fine" I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO!!! (or should I say, I only have a razor to turn to)
Sorry to anyone who reads this, as you can see I'm sorta freaking out.
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Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2007 11:56 am
So, my therapist and a doctor are both saying that I could have Bi-Polar. I don't want to admit it, for some reason I feel ashamed about it. Like it's all my fault or something. I guess it's understandable for me to feel this way, after all I do have people telling me I'm just a drama queen.
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Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 7:37 am
I flipped out last night and I destroyed my painting I was working on for art class. My teacher is going to be angry and I'm nervous about telling him. But it wouldn't look the way I wanted it, it wouldn't be perfect. So I took black paint and threw it all over the canvas, then I was full of rage and cut myself yet again. I'm ashamed, hurt, and really pissed off at myself right now. I feel like a complete failure who is unstable, how am I going to survive all by myself in college next year?
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Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 8:44 am
=/ That's so sad. I'm sorry you felt that way that you went and did that.
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Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 3:06 pm
Prince Darialan Love =/ That's so sad. I'm sorry you felt that way that you went and did that. So am I, but now I have to deal with the consequences of my ******** up thoughts.
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