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 Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 1:31 pm
Cassidy immediately brightened, not just at the praise but because Riker said it was good. Well–of course it was good, it was still just nice to hear. He liked that Riker wasn’t playing tough guy with no taste buds.
Too bad he didn’t want him sitting next to his mom, Cassidy was already feeling competitive and was certain he could shout so loud that nobody could hear what she was saying.
“I wouldn’t say Elliot outruns you easily. I think you two are pretty on par, I just think you hold back a bit. What, are you afraid of the spotlight? Or is his entourage just a little intimidating? Maybe the Mr. Reids will grade your tests harder if you beat Elliot? I’m just kidding,” he laughed, and leaned onto his elbows again.
“Does everyone else cheering for you drown out your mom? You could get ear plugs if you need a break from her.”
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 1:31 pm
He didn’t want the spotlight. He wanted to stay out of it as much as possible. He didn’t like being noticed because it was usually for a bad reason.
Still, he didn’t think he was holding back. Maybe he was, subconsciously. He didn’t want anyone to get mad at him. He could still remember losing an arm wrestling match to a Chibi.
He could only imagine the heartache he would have gotten if he had beat her.
He was competitive, yes. But he didn’t really want to win if it meant his life being miserable for it.
Maybe if he kept losing, his mother would get bored. No, she just wanted the excuse to drink. Despite alcohol not being allowed.
“Yeah, probably,” he mumbled, but took another bite. He could get ear plugs, but then he might get harassed for having them in the first place, if she found out about them. “You guys don’t have to cheer for me. Or… I don’t know. Just cheer for everyone I guess.”
He hated that he was being so miserable. He was probably just making a big deal of nothing.
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 1:35 pm
Cassidy nodded along as Riker spoke but something was still just rubbing him the wrong way. Like, obviously Riker was upset about something, it wasn’t like him to be so down. Julian wasn't even around to temper his fiery personality, so what was this? Riker was never so complacent with him.
He must have been really upset about something.
“Hey,” he said, and wiggled in his seat so he could get closer. There wasn’t anyone around but he still leaned in as if to guarantee that no one could hear them.
“What’s going on? You’re so down, I’m not used to seeing you like this. I’ll cheer for everyone, sure, but you and Elliot, you know. You’re special to me. I’m always rooting for you guys. Mostly because if I didn’t you’d drag me down, but you guys are still teammates to me so I can’t help it.”
He nudged the toe of Riker’s shoe gently with his own.
“So what’s up, is there anything I can do to help? Should I go get Julian?”
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 1:36 pm
Riker immediately scoffed at the suggestion to get Julian. As if he wanted Julian to be pulled into every little problem he was having. As if Julian didn’t worry about him enough when he was moping and being miserable.
And it wasn’t fair. Cassidy could figure him out so easily, and Riker wasn’t sure if it was just because he couldn’t hide his expression or what. He really, really hoped his disguise as Reims held up, because he didn’t know what he’d do if Cassidy figured that out.
“It’s fine. I just…--”
Just what? Was he really going to tell Cassidy? What did he expect to accomplish if he did?
“I just regret some things I did before. I tried apologizing and it wasn’t enough and I’m trying to live with that,” he shrugged. Énna had every right not to forgive him.
“Sorry, don’t worry about it. It’s fine,” he mumbled, not reacting to the way Cassidy nudged his toe. But also not shoving back at him or pushing him away.
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 1:37 pm
Cassidy was watching Riker closely, partly because he was just easy to look at and partly because he was not easy to read. You had to watch for the tiniest little cracks in his mask, and even then he was so good at covering it up or chasing people away.
“Well, okay. I won’t worry if you don’t want me to.” He nudged his foot some more, a little bit like it was a game, now. “But it doesn’t mean I’ll just stop caring about whatever’s going on, either.”
Riker didn’t like the attention, that much was pretty obvious. Cassidy wondered why. It wasn’t like he was going to go blasting Riker’s personal stuff all over social media or gossiping with anyone else.
“I like that you apologized, that’s very mature.” Very attractive. “You did your best though, right? But you’re still eating yourself up about it?”
He didn’t know if it was melodramatic or an indication that Riker had a lot of layers he worked very hard to make sure other people saw. Which was what Cassidy had been saying all along, it just didn’t seem appropriate to gloat about that right now.
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 1:41 pm
“I’m not so sure about that,” Riker frowned, but he was still nibbling on the pizza and taking a few sips of water from the bottle he finally opened. Even if he apologized, he knew it wasn’t enough. He’d lied to Énna about his identity…
Just like he was lying to Cassidy about it.
He supposed the only difference was that Cassidy didn’t also have magical powers. Or something like that.
Maybe it didn’t matter. Maybe a lie was just a lie, even if it was supposedly to protect himself and others. He doubted Cassidy could be in the Negaverse, and he’d already seen Jupiter. And Ganymede.
This time, he pushed back against Cassidy’s foot a bit, giving him a flustered glance because he wasn’t sure what Cassidy was trying to do. Was his foot in the way? Was he trying to get him to react?
“I’m sorry I didn’t visit you,” he said after a moment, before going back to picking at the pizza. “I tried, but it wasn’t enough. You were already gone.”
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 1:42 pm
Once more, Cassidy was already in a good mood now that Riker was responding to his foot-prodding. Enthusiastically, but with far too little effort to push him away or hurt him, Cassidy continued to prod Riker’s foot with his own.
“You came to visit me?”
He smiled enough that it lit up his eyes. “I didn’t know. That’s sweet. Even if I was already gone, it’s the thought that counts, right? I’d have liked to see you, I missed you. But maybe it’s for the best, you’d have just had to listen to all those machines and smell all the sterilizing chemicals. Oh, my hair was so greasy. And I looked like a corpse!” he laughed, like it really was something they should find amusing.
“Is that why you got so jumpy when you saw me? I mean, not the corpse thing, but because you felt bad about not getting to see me in the hospital?”
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 6:06 pm
“No,” Riker immediately grumbled, pushing his foot against Cassidy’s again when he couldn’t figure out what he wanted. He was trying to ignore the heat going to his ears, glad that his hair was down and covering most of them, probably.
Maybe it was why he was so jumpy when he saw Cassidy, but he definitely wasn’t going to admit that.
“Yeah, I bet you looked really bad. Like, there’s definitely no way I want to see any pictures or know whatever scars you have look like,” he insisted, maybe a bit more aggressively than he should have. He was trying to play it cool and make sure Cassidy didn’t suspect him of being Reims.
“I was just-- passing through. I mean. Like. Near the hospital. So. I figured why not.”
And then he found out that Cassidy was gone, and for a few horrible moments thought that he’d been too late and that Cassidy had died. Thankfully he’d only been released to go home, but it was still a horrible few seconds before the nurse clarified.
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 6:22 pm
Cassidy liked playing what ultimately amounted to playful foot wrestling, it was better for him than arm wrestling, and maybe discreet enough that Riker wouldn’t get self conscious.
“Oh man, are you sure you don’t want to see pictures? I’ve got so many.” Cassidy was already reaching for his phone and the corners of his lips were tipping back into another smile. “I could show you how my hospital room was decorated if you don’t want to see the gross stuff. I got super into Days of Our Lives while I was there, they played it nonstop. You should have stopped by, we could have marathoned. I didn’t have anyone to gossip with. Well, some of the nurses would watch with me while I was getting my check ups, but that doesn’t count. They missed out on all the juicy stuff.”
It wasn’t an important conversation, he knew it. Riker carried a lot of unnecessary weight though, so the more he could unload, the better. His phone was out and he was scrolling through something, but he didn’t stop teasing Riker’s foot while he did so. “Next time I’m in the hospital, come visit me. And you stay out of the hospital. Or else I’ll come visit you and you’ll be stuck watching with me anyway!”
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Posted: Tue Oct 29, 2024 7:20 pm
“I don’t want to see pictures!” he hissed, remembering all too well the picture Cassidy had taken from inside the car during the actual crash. Not that Cassidy knew that he’d seen it. He saw it as Reims. He’d wanted to see it. He needed to know.
“I don’t even know what you’re talking about! Is that a television show?” Riker couldn’t help but ask, even if he told himself that he wasn’t interested.
“You’re not allowed to go to the hospital, no!” he sputtered, awkwardly pushing Cassidy’s foot away at the wrong angle so he ended up knocking off his own shoe. He groaned and tried fishing it out from under the table with his foot.
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Posted: Wed Oct 30, 2024 10:08 am
When Cassidy laughed again, it wasn’t cruel. “Don’t worry, Riker. I won’t show you anything gross. I can’t have you throwing up the food I just gave you!”
Riker’s shoe was closer to him than Riker, but instead of making him play footsies just to get it back, he nudged it over so Riker could reach it.
“I’ll do my best not to have to go to the hospital. It’s not like I want to be there! Anyway, I promised some people I’d be extra careful so you don’t have to worry about me. I’m playing it safe. You’ve really never heard of Days of Our Lives? Oh, Riker.”
He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “It’s a soap opera, it’s been going on since the sixties. It’s so crazy, like those people writing it have to be on drugs. Nothing is real and everything is undoable, and everybody’s got a twin or siblings or babies they don’t know about. It’s so funny. Look,” he finally turned over the phone.
It was a picture of a hospital room, full of cards and flowers and gifts. A television hung in the corner and there was a big window to the side of the room, and though much wasn’t clear in the panoramic image, there were obviously some trees and a nice view of the city.
“So you don’t have to wonder what my room looked like. I took a picture in case I missed it. Ha! I don’t. Look at those boring concrete walls! And it was always so cold. I was under three blankets when I took this picture. And the machines were always making noise. If you miss me, you should come over to my house and visit. If you want the hospital experience, I’ll lay in bed looking sorry for myself and you can pet my hair for me,” he laughed.
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Posted: Wed Oct 30, 2024 11:18 am
Riker was grateful to be able to fish out his shoe, and was struggling to slide his foot back in as Cassidy showed him the picture of the room. He frowned, clearly pensive and remorseful.
The thought of Cassidy in that hospital room. Cold and hooked up to machines. Surrounded by well wishes from everyone except Riker, because he’d been a coward or… something.
Did he miss Cassidy?
If he was being honest with himself, he had. He got flustered when they were around other people, but like this…? Or as Reims… He happened to think Cassidy was witty and fun. Not that he would ever admit that out loud!
“Okay,” he heard himself say, but made sure he was staring at the phone and not up at Cassidy. He shrugged, because really? It was the least he could do, right? To make it up to him. It wasn’t pity that he felt or anything like that. He really, really regretted not seeing him. They were teammates after all. And Cassidy had so many opportunities to make fun of him and, well, hadn’t. It was nice.
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Posted: Wed Oct 30, 2024 11:21 am
It wasn’t the response he’d expected but Cassidy found the jokes waiting on his tongue dying quickly because Riker said yes. Maybe he was just trying to appease Cassidy–and was it really fair to ask so much of him now when he was already so stressed about his mother?
Cassidy wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth, though.
“Oh, good! I’ll cook for you! I mean, you’ve already been trying my food, but I’ll be able to make something warm for you. I’ll figure out when my dad won’t be home. Nothing against him, I just don’t want my parents being all weird.” He rolled his eyes. “Besides, you’re more honest with me when no one else is around. I bet we could actually have some fun if you weren’t worried about what anyone else was thinking.”
He laughed, but it was light and without any bite to it. He wasn't laughing at Riker.
“I could use a big, strong guy like you to help me finish up my room, actually. I haven’t been able to get one of my shelves up, maybe you can help me when you come over. I’m sure it won’t be any trouble for you. My arm’s making it hard,” he said, and for emphasis once again tried to raise his elbow higher than his shoulder and failed. He probably could have given Riker big, pleading eyes but he didn’t even think he’d need to. Instead, he nodded to the food. “Work up your strength, Riker! I need you strong!”
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Posted: Wed Oct 30, 2024 11:23 am
Part of that had been in his mind when he agreed. He remembered how Julian was in a new room trying to figure out his place in everything. Being able to have someone help move things around, or hold up posters or whatever to figure out what looked best was a good thing to have. Probably. Maybe. He knew Julian would be happy to have him around even if he wasn’t helping, but Riker wanted to make sure he was comfortable.
For Cassidy, he’d already offered to help him however he could, although that had been as Reims. He glanced up when Cassidy lifted his arm to show, but he already knew. He’d seen the scars. He’d seen the picture.
He wasn’t sure about having fun, but he did want to help Cassidy. So he nodded in agreement about helping him with his shelves. He didn’t want to take any credit for suggesting things to help with, so he was glad Cassidy had the same idea.
“Just--” he started and then paused, pressing his lips together. He didn’t know if he had any right to ask, or suggest, or if it even mattered. “Tonight… if she’s not as worked up, uh… it would be better. Probably. Please.”
For him. For everyone else. If she got into shouting matches or ended up drinking more because she was angry or encouraged, he didn’t want to have to deal with whatever happened. And of course he was still thinking about what was going to happen, even when he was also wondering what he was getting himself into when it came to helping Cassidy.
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Posted: Wed Oct 30, 2024 11:27 am
“Tonight?” Cassidy clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and resisted the urge to claim Riker moved fast. He wanted that!
“Come over whenever you want. Do you have my new address? I’ll give it to you anyway.” But, so Riker could keep eating, he began to fish around for a piece of paper. Sure, he could have texted it to Riker, but he always seemed so squeamish about whatever got sent to him. Maybe his mom was a helicopter mom.
Cassidy didn’t like her much but he had enough manners not to just announce it. Handwriting his address made it more personal anyway, so he wrote in neat, meticulous letters.
“If she gets too worked up, you should just spend the night. My dad won’t be home until after I leave for school. Overnight shifts and all. For as much as he works, you’d think he was trying to get away from me!” He laughed again, and his eyes were on the paper but he smiled up at Riker when he slid it over.
“We can head back together after your meet. That’s just in case you ever need to stop by and don’t have me there to lead the way.”
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