Welcome to Gaia! ::

Attention snapped away from the distant waves, his eyes trailed Ei’s fingers like a ball bouncing down the steps of the words they left behind.

“He will—“ the answer full of surety, hope, and a tone that made the words sound like there could’ve been an ‘or else’ tied lovingly to the ends of them. He polished his glass off steadily, enjoying the dry bite, the way it quenched nothing and made him hunger for more; wine, food, conversations exactly like this! He couldn’t express how he’d missed Eion in words alone—

How he’d missed watching Aelius n his beloved interact in their own way; quick n smart n just a hair above him.

“And it’s just nerves,” a half shrug as he slid the empty glass aside, “you have that effect on people, Ei. The way they all wanna try for you, the way it’s been months for the others—“ giving Eion a knowing look, warm with banked praise, “and yet we can fall back into step like nothing’s changed. I did.”

He thought the others maybe struggled with it at first? The ones most attached. Closest. He knew he did, privately, while doing his best to tamp it all down. Knew the others found their moorings eventually. Found new hobbies and ways to anchor themselves. That Aelius had finally begun to nestle into place alongside them, carving out a niche.

“Even if things have. For the better, I think?” He wouldn’t touch the fixing comment with a ten foot pole, but the rest? It had him laughing, a gut deep rumble and purr. “Hah-noway— ‘nless his right hand is also his boyfriend? Or his left, can you imagine, bein’ flexible n a dual-wielder? ********—” the words accompanied by a rude jacking off gesture, his smile wide.

“Get a few more buttons undone on that ******** shirt n I might volunteer for it.“ It was fun to tease like this, to play up the moment of it all. But if Eion wanted a real update, a serious one? Waru settled enough to think, to breathe in humid air and out a centering sigh. “But seriously, he’s unwound himself. He’s — s**t — been coping in better ways than me, maybe? It took time...it was rough..but I dropped enough hints to the others. It started with the cat, then the wisp, and our maid-in-waiting is good for him; friendly, nice, supportive. And you know I can be a pushy ******** b*****d once I get my teeth sunk into something deep enough.”

“Heh, though it turned out the key was not t’push at all? Not like I had been, all different but the same….” The sound of steps and clinking of fresh wares gave him pause. Shutting up just long enough for the same distinguished waiter to come through. Clearing out the old glasses, bottle, ice, and beginning anew with Aelius’s ordered Riesling and the first round of appetizers. The beginning of the tasting, a line of three wines for he n Aelius both; a sparkling white to a robust, flat red, pretty as a sunset, shallowly filled. He paused to admire the workmanship, the little nod and bow..

“And th’last little thing we did over the summer as a group before you came back, ‘CEO’s orders,” and the sign for Queen came easily, the sign for mission? Blurry in his brain, but ‘Plan’ came naturally as the fidgeting he usually did with his hands. “Y’shoulda seen ‘em all working together. N’him? Y’would’ve been proud.”

“Though what I really wish you could’ve been here for was—“ half whispered as he slotted himself along Eions side and spelled it out slowly. Because he had gone out of his way to taste the rainbow, been ridden hard and put away wet by a dragon of an entirely different pedigree. He made the signs for this sharp and clear; twisting filth into the motion for his most favorite-est curse word of all, in any and every language. Because getting ridden and getting ******** felt nigh interchangeable and too fun to resist dragging out crudely with his fingers alone.

Waru had a better insight into people than Eion did, he understood this implicitly. If Waru thought Aelius could rise to the occasion, and Waru thought that people wanted to try for him, then Eion was more inclined to trust Waru's judgment than his own. His pessimism was oft colored by the ways people disappointed him, the ways they took no agency for themselves. And Waru had been around the lot much more recently than him.

And Eion wanted, for once, to leave the pessimism behind. If only for a day. If only for a few hours.

Most of them had fallen into line for him like nothing had changed. It was evident by the way in which everyone took his orders in stride when it came time to find Tama. They were unquestioning. They trusted him. And, so far, he hadn't led them to their demise.

But Waru only tolerated seriousness for so long before his mind inevitably wandered to the crude. Eion flashed him a dry look when the boy took up the idea of what Aelius could do in bed. Find out for yourself, he signed back. Eion wasn't interested in telling any secrets that Waru had a chance at finding out for himself.

When the waiter dropped by, Eion was unperturbed. He continued signing even as the food arrived.

You make no damn sense. Eion shook his head at the boy. 'All different but the same'. Maybe he just needed time and someone to drag him out of the house. Or someone to listen to him. Don't know what it was; not like I could get a straight answer out of him.

Sighing through his nose, Eion finished off his glass. He all but choked when Waru dug into another set of steamy details. He coughed a few times, cleared his throat, coughed again. Once he'd spat up the wine he inhaled, Eion smacked Waru on the shoulder playfully.

Now collect the set so you can compare and contrast them. Eion flashed him an arch little smile.

He paused when the music began, however. It came with no preamble, or no more than a few notes to measure its sound. Eion turned in his seat, looking for the source of the song before he realized that it was Aelius seated at a piano. The boy recognized the song, but it was too many years old in his memories for him to retain the title of it. Something Chopin. Something that Rowan used to play.

It reminded him so much more of the boy he used to know. The boy who was all smiles and grace and laughter, who warmed under a set of eyes and was eager to please with his many talents. Playing piano was no easy feat, he knew; there was a short time where Rowan tried to teach him. Eion — Elex — stumbled, of course, perhaps managed a basic melody mostly without mistakes. Something like Mary had a Little Lamb. It was only enough for him to appreciate how difficult an instrument it was to master.

Taking up his pen, Eion jotted a quick sentence down on a new sheet of notebook paper and ripped it out by the perforations. He motioned to Waru that he would only be a minute. Sliding out of his seat, Eion clutched the paper in hand as he retraced their steps back into the establishment, then found the bar relatively busy. He stood by; eventually the bartender noticed him. Gesturing to the paper in his hand, Eion laid it out for her. She nodded. Perhaps she thought him deaf.

Another round for the piano player, it read. Put it on my tab.

His wishes acknowledged, Eion returned to the table where he had left Waru unattended with appetizers aplenty. Settling back into his chair, he reached abruptly for the mussels in a rich parmesan reduction. Better to eat them while still warm.

It was easy. Losing himself to the music. The muscle memory was swift to return as he slipped across the keys with ease and grace. He wasn’t a professional by any means. His lack of finesse would be obvious to the discerning ear, but in the moment, Aelius didn’t care. He didn’t care if he missed a note or barely brushed a wrong one. It was all lost to the full sound he was creating. A harmony in its symphony of keys, hammers and strings. He just enjoyed being. Enjoyed the ride of the song as he moved through its phrases.

And as he finally wound down, and played the last note, he sighed contently, still lost to the ease of the moment. A smattering of applause both from the patio and inside was what finally broke through the haze of contentment and Aelius’s smile widened a bit. He turned and ducked his head in thanks before closing up the piano and gathering his whiskey that sat sweating on the piano top. With care, Aelius wiped a hand across the gathered condensation on the instrument to prevent any marring on the painted surface. It was then a bartender walked up to him. “Someone liked your performance and bought you a round.” She said as she handed him another glass of whiskey on the rocks. The confusion on his face must have shown as she nodded to the table off to the side in indication. His table.

“Thank you for bringing it out.” He offered her a smile in thanks and the woman responded in kind.

“Not a problem. I wasn’t sure if you’d come back in for another so wanted to make sure you got it. If you need anything else I’ll be here all night.” And she turned and headed back inside.

Now double fisting whiskey Aelius had a choice to make and that choice was downing his first drink in a fell swoop. Again he grimaced at the heat and sharp taste of the whiskey. He hadn’t intended to have so much liquor, but Aelius wasn’t going to say no to it. While he didn’t know which one had been his benefactor, Aelius felt a swell in his chest for them and he wasn’t going to insult. Didn’t want to.

Feeling better, whether that was from the music or the alcohol was up for debate, Aelius rejoined the table. He slid into his chair with ease, depositing his empty glass out of the way and placing his newly filled glass to his right. “Sorry.” He said sheepishly. “I just needed something a bit harder than wine.” The buzz of anxiety still clawed at him, but it was hazier now. Less pronounced in its pestering. Enough so that the man could function on a more normal level and not be over-analyzing every little thing.

“So, how’s the food?” He glanced to Waru who had obviously begun to enjoy the food and drinks. Eion was also well into one of the dishes he’d ordered. Since Aelius had opted out of appetizers he was content to just grab his first small cup of the flight and sip it. It wasn’t to his taste. Too dry and bitter, but the small sampling went down either way. Waste not want not, and all.

If he thought Eion had a point, that his boy was, as always, right. Especially about Aelius maybe preferring to perform a private sort of duet rather than a triple act for all the world to see and cheer for. Waru kept it to himself, compiled all his kudos and ‘Yes love, you told me so’s‘ for a time when they could be passed out sparingly enough that it wouldn’t seem obvious he was handing them out at all. Even when they were well deserved— Easier to throw his attention to the man in question, to watch Aelius talk his way back into their presence as if he was some intruder who needed to bother with apologizing at all. It was stupid — Waru felt a fondness for Aelius’s self-imposed outsidership all the damn same.

‘You’d know if you tried some—‘ the thought stayed buried, lingered in his gaze. The way Waru wanted to insist upon the thing, to demand it while watching Aelius' throat bob with each fresh swallow of dry enough to curdle a dairy farm's wine.

The erasure of all hesitance, indulgence in the kind of egregious, animal mannered hedonism that would’ve gotten them kicked out of the place. He thought the waiters deserved some fun though, a spark of a sight to behold. Either of the boys — his — fed wine from kisses and treats from steady hands and season slicked fingers. Aelius, and Eion, a pair of ******** talents that prefered wildness over being tame any day. That would bare their teeth and make him bleed for imagining either of them in such a way; pampered, hand fed, coddled. Possessed and given orders to. Swaddled away from the wider meaner world in a nice little den full of all the creatures of comforts.

It wasn’t his place to do, would never be, but he considered it all the same. Nudged with absentminded eagerness a board worth sharing Aelius’s way. The epitome of ’what’s mine is yours and yours is mine’ and he thought to himself of all the ways they’d shared — how nothing a plate of food seemed, the act of pressing it in Aelius' direction and making obvious eyes over it.

He didn’t catch Eion at first, could hear the words spoken even if all he’d gleaned was a swift thumbs up, played the a** as he opened his mouth to explain in depth what most toddlers could perceive.

“And that sign means it’s good— t’which, I ******** agree. Th’shits delicious,” all drawled enthusiasm, before he found himself caught in the side by one wicked, sharp elbow. His attention thoroughly obtained, “—vicious ********>—“ and though he narrowed his eyes at Eion for the move it was all warmth within them; a little bloody, licked with fiery promise, but warm nonetheless. “N’Ei’ also wants t‘know if you’re feeling better? M’betting that ‘something stronger’ helped, huh?” his gaze stayed affixed on Eion’s fingers; more as if he was plotting a way to poach the boy's next juicy muscle from between them, to suck it free, sauce, shell and all. Rather than to read any words made with the aim of himself as the translator.

I know it isn't easy, he signed back, but it must be done.

Eion didn't know if Aelius had an aversion to introspection. He might well have; the boy had aversion to pain, after all, and if introspection was painful, then Eion could understand why he would be keen to avoid it. No one wanted that kind of agony, but in Eion's experience, it only lingered without untwisting and solving each of its causes.

While it hurt to watch Aelius squirm like that, it also tried his patience. The officer in him wanted to snap, spit it out. We don't have all day. But that was a side of him that he needed to compartmentalize of late; not only for these small moments, in honor of a person's softness, but also in the field where one rushed move was far more costly than it was in Destiny City. That was his process and his struggle alone, however, and it needn't be exacerbating or interfering with Aelius's.

The answer involved a lot of waffling. A lot of reconsiderations after responses, as if he was warring with himself, or struggling to nose up the truth. You don't have to answer right away. Just tell me when you find what feels most truthful. He wasn't sure what other assurances to give; he hadn't the soft touch that Waru often had with people who were in a place of need. It was a skill he quite wanted to collect, but doubted that his nature would accept it as anything more than a frustrating ruse that curtailed what made him an effective officer.

Eion stole a look at Waru, then reached for his journal and pen. With one hand shielding Waru's view of his writing, Eion jotted down a quick response for Aelius's eyes only, tore the paper out, folded it in half, and slid it across the table to him.

I thought he would be helpful to you, it read. Pain in the a** as he is, he's better at understanding what people need than I am. I was taught how to dismantle them, not put them back together.

It isn't much, with so much time squandered between now and then, but I'm sorry.

Now it was his turn to play coy. Eion took up his glass of wine, refilled it, swirled it, smelled it, sipped it. And while the wine appeared to draw in all of his attention, he still occasionally looked askance at Waru, suspicious that a boy might misbehave soon.

It was rote, the way he spoke Eions signs to life, marred by the occasional stumble for his guessing to recall the look of ‘truthful’ versus ‘honest’ — tho one of those required an H at the start — trying to capture the tone inherent in every sharp, graceful flick of phalanges.

He returned Eions glance with a look full of knowing, soaked up Aelius' gratitude. The kind of words that made his ego swell, that made him wonder if he stood atop some unknown to him pedestal in Aelius eyes — all the ways he wanted to ruin it if he did — he preferred being kept humble, even if he had to do the humbling himself.

Then the note came out and he felt the air shift as a quick bit of secret was exchanged; the monumental effort it took to keep from asking with more than just his wide, curious, begging eyes. The out of left center, grenades worth of honesty that fell from Aelius lips in the aftermath of reading whatever his boy wrote down.

Waru tried not to ******** stare—

Between one, the other. Tried to hide the quiet inhale of surprise behind a fist, the welling of joy on his face. Failed ********, spectacularly. All the ways he was about as subtle as slammed brakes on a big rig. Because suddenly the world was right; silent, perfect, amazing! The note meaningless. The impromptu dinner a success!

Better even -—

“Awwh…Aelius…” brimming with emotion, a dry swallow, a slow blink, he made light work of drowning the insistent noises he wanted to make behind wine he wasn’t even tasting anymore. Not for how he wanted to crow, to tell Aelius that he didn’t have to miss what he could have!!

To drag them both bodily —

It was silent.

The table had gone quiet after the exchange of note and truths. Not a movement of hands or whipping of paper. Aelius hadn’t expected that. Perhaps he should have?

Waru was the first to break that silence. How long had it actually lasted? To Aelius it felt like an eternity. One in which his mind was quick to admonish him for. Another bumble on his part. A step too far too fast?
It hurt. But, perhaps this was what he deserved? His punishment for the mistakes and cruel words? Eion had made a choice months ago and perhaps it was solidified now? Cemented in stone and tossed into the ocean, never to be again.

Almost recently, he folded the note back as he pulled towards himself. Folding it back up, he leaned forward and tucked it into a back pocket all the while he watched the frantic look from Eion to Waru. He sucked in a shaky breath. “Sorry.” He said plainly, eyes focused on anything but the two of them. The food, drinks, a random seagull cawing in the sky, any of it was more interesting than looking at Waru and Eion. Waru’s, hopefully, open gaze was as painful for it’s genuine pleasure as Eion’s were for his silent plea’s for help from his husband.

The glass of whiskey that he had opted not to finish earlier, was downed in one wincing gulp. Ice clattered against the glass as he set it back down with almost exaggerated care. “I can…I can head out if you two prefer. Give you both some time alone?” He made to move, to retreat. Both embarrassment and pain at the reaction of his truthfulness fueling his movements.

And Aelius was about to tumble away like a leaf on the wind —

Apart from reaching out and pressing the boy's hands to the table, Eion was at a loss for how to say stop in a meaningful manner. Waru was quick to put an arm around him, which complicated the idea of getting up and catching the boy. But Waru, with those speaking privileges that he oft loved to squander, was clever enough to shut down that excuse to avoid sitting in the very real awkwardness that they'd created together.

Almost like he was on Aelius's side, Waru was also quick to offer a social out at Eion's expense. This earned him a swat to the tit and a stern, exasperated look.

His hands trembled just so for how flustered he felt. I don't understand what that means, he signed, deciding that Waru-the-interpreter understood him well enough to soften his abrupt language and reshape it to something more human, more digestible and acceptable to someone who had always been so inextricably bound to social spaces and and cultured places. If they just fought each other, that would be easier for Eion — having it out in a spar was more familiar language to him than that of trying to portray action through words in this a**-backwards fashion — but he was trying to meet Aelius on the boy's comfort zone.

'Let's get up and fight about it' wasn't a suggestion people made to each other. Eion sighed through his nose. There was a different option he could suggest, but —

Is that supposed to mean the 'me' from before? Eion fingerspelled his old name. That 'me' is gone. I can't do anything about that. I can't undo the work of years. And we're sitting right across from each other so he can't mean that in a way that makes sense to me. Don't know how to help this.