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 Posted: Mon Jun 01, 2020 11:31 am
"I see." So it was as expected. Though they'd barely shared more than one full conversation, he sometimes gave her a 'bad' impression. Nataniel had to assume that at some point within the handful of minutes they'd ever directly communicated, something hadn't been 'right' by her standards, and he tried to consider what it might have been. He hadn't wanted to participate in her charity, but he doubted many did. It shouldn't make him any worse than anyone else who'd said "thanks but no thanks."
And she couldn't have been that offended by it, besides. She was sharing her unhealthy stash with him now.
Nataniel didn't need to busy his fingers in the same way she did. He was nearly completely still where he sat, head tipped down, dark lashes half lowered, now-empty fingers resting in his lap. His body didn't need to be occupied when his mind had that more than covered.
Did he come off as mean and distant? He hadn't ignored her or tried to avoid her. He hadn't snapped at her for bothering him with her charity upon their first introduction or over any of her assumptions of him since then. He was honest and upfront in his intentions and beliefs, and he'd always been told honesty was a virtue... Except where it lent itself to 'bad impressions' or things people didn't want to hear, apparently.
'You seem like the fit type who hates sugar.'
'You seem like the mean, distant type who doesn't know how to people.'
Nataniel's brow pinched in thought, his lips pursing slightly. "You do not know me," he replied quietly after a moment. "So I am unsure if you should be slotting me into these categories for people you have created. You do not know how I think or how I feel or why I do things, so comparing me against this class of person 'more like me' seems... presumptuous and unfair at best. I show what I am able to. If that does not frequently involve your definition of what constitutes 'kindness,' then it isn't because I consider it a weakness or I am uninterested in people thinking I might be nice. It's because I don't find it necessary or maybe it is not worth the effort it would cost."
"But I could just as easily say the same thing about cruelty. I have not been cold to you. I have not been distant. I have answered anything you asked of me, and I have never ignored you. I am unsure if I understand how this follows your 'mean, distant-type' model."
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Posted: Thu Jun 11, 2020 3:38 pm
"You're right, I don't know you," she agreed. It was better to agree than explain herself right now. She'd tweaked a nerve somewhere and explaining herself only seemed to make things worse. If he was happy with the way he was then there wasn't really a reason for her to intrude, and even then, changing someone really wasn't her business to begin with.
"But, I'm also not so sure you'd want me to know you either," she pointed out gently and offered a wry smile. She was only human and when it came to the base nature of most humans they were inclined to categorise people into slots that made sense. To her, whether he agreed with it or not he was standoffish and wasn't particularly approachable, he wouldn't be the first to be like that or the last and she had no doubt that he was open with someone at least.
...It just wasn't her.
"That being said I will point out that I never said you'd been cruel to me," she added teasingly. She didn't seem inclined to get philosophical, but just as he could chastise her for sorting him in to a box, she could at least give a light-hearted jibe of her own. Cold and distant she would probably give him based on her own remarks, that was totally fair if she were to be objective about it.
A shrug and she twisted the wrapper into a little bow with a satisfied smile.
"Everyone is allowed to be who they want to be and I'm not going to tell anyone anything different to that," she said at last and sighed. "But unless people actually want to let someone in then all people can do is form an opinion on what they know. If it helps if anyone were to ever ask me what you were like I'd probably just say I didn't know all that much," she mused.
"Probably warn them off asking you to donate your time to charity though," she conceded in reference to one of their previous encounters. "That didn't go so well last time."
A joke, but she wasn't sure if he'd pick up on it!
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Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2020 1:51 pm
Nataniel was still watching the table more so than the girl across from him, but there was a very slight pinch to his brow, and almost-pursing of his lips, barely there, but the only indicator of very faint confusion.
"...I approached you," Nataniel muttered softly. Not initially, of course. Liliane was far more brazen than him in that regard, to simply walk up to someone she didn't know anything about and ask for something from them. Nataniel could barely even fathom anyone responding differently than he had. But this time, in the library, he had walked up to her when she had been otherwise minding her own business.
He was no scholar of social mannerisms, but he thought the implication lent itself to some degree of openness. It would have been easiest and most convenient to ignore her, and by consciously choosing to do otherwise...
"I was prepared to extend the invitation to-" 'Become friends' sounded like a disastrous amount of work Nataniel didn't think he was prepared to commit to. But they were students who shared a class and may eventually need to work on problems together. It benefited him to have some form of ally at school. "-begin the process of getting to know you, and, presumably, allowing you to get to know me."
He didn't need to add that he probably wouldn't have, without the initial temptation of her treats and his unfortunate craving for them.
"It does help a little," he admitted in a murmur, at Liliane's explanation that she probably wasn't likely to have much to say about him to anyone else. That suited Nataniel fine. It was one of his least favorite thoughts: to think that people were talking about him, judging him, while he wasn't even there to know about it. Absurdly presumptuous of him, he knew, to fancy that anyone even cared enough to say anything behind his back, but still an alarmingly uncomfortable thought, just the same.
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Posted: Sun Sep 06, 2020 5:24 pm
Now that did make her raise both eyebrows. He had definitely approached her, but she had just assumed that perhaps he had been drawn to the sweets. Everyone else had certainly been inclined to scoot by, ask for one, and she'd been happy to offer some of her share. She wouldn't have blamed him for joining the 'masses' in that respect, in fact, it would have been something she was more prepared for than what actually happened.
Had she heard him right?
"Really?" she asked, a warm smile on her lips as she sat back in her chair and peered at him. "I mean I'd be down for that," she added. At least she didn't sound awkward when she spoke, she'd certainly been caught by surprise but she did have the talent of not sounding put off by it too. She'd watched others as they were caught out more than once and while a surprise might have been enjoyed it still didn't mean that the initial reaction hadn't been slightly cringe worthy.
"But are we going to have to set out a couple of rules for this?" she teased, lifting her hands to wiggle her fingers at him. "I feel like this is one of those contract deals where I might need a rule book to make sure I don't go too far," she added. Her smile turned into a grin as she continued to eye him up, ever impish, she was clearly in good humour and the opportunity for her to have a new friend was something she definitely welcomed.
Regardless of whether he might consider them simply class mates or acquaintances, she recognised this as an opportunity; and maybe, just maybe, she might get to see a slightly less stiff side to him.
...Maybe there was treasure underneath!
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Posted: Sun Sep 06, 2020 6:05 pm
He didn't like that expression. Nataniel was wary in making these types of claims to begin with, as he wasn't often willing to surrender hours from his own schedule to 'get to know' anyone on a more personal level. But that little smile Lily shot him was enough to make regret curl in his stomach. Nataniel should have known better. The benefits were there, but they hardly outweighed the negatives.
He stood abruptly, the chair sliding back from the table with a scraping of its legs against the floor.
"That will not be necessary," Nataniel murmured, the heat that rose to his face obscured mostly by the darkness of his skin. "There will hardly be opportunity to allow you to go very 'far,' at all." He had no idea what that meant or what Liliane was trying to convey. Should he be concerned? What rules? "It will be convenient to have a classmate to work on projects together, but it should bleed into the rest of our lives very little."
He reached and plucked up the pen she'd been sketching with when he'd approached and tugged the corner of her notebook toward him. In thin, slanting script, he scrawled his number before passing it back to her. "You may contact me for issues that concern class and for no other reason."
Once he was out of her vicinity, he could decide more rationally if he ought to respond to those texts or if it would be easier to block her and forget the experience altogether.
He inclined his head briefly before standing to his full, straight height. "I appreciate your willingness to share your treats with me."
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Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2020 6:07 am
She coughed to hold back her laughter at his reaction.
"Those were the rules I was talking about," she replied as she reached out a hand to take his number. A glance down at it and she located her phone to put it into her contacts properly. Truth be told, if she didn't do it now she'd lose it or forget what it was for to begin with. Once that was done she cleared her throat and shook her head, her lips adopting a 'serious' and grim line.
"You have my word I won't contact you with any questionable images or jokes," she agreed. "We shall keep our communications to a purely professional level," she added. Unsurprisingly her tone was riddled with amusement, but while she might have been playful and enjoyed playing jokes on people, there were others she did need to get to know better before she risked it.
...Nat happened to be one of those people.
"You're welcome for the treats though, it was probably for the best that they were shared out or I'd be in a terrible state later," she conceded with a smile.
"Look forward to working with you though!" she added in reference to the class projects he had specified. At least she wouldn't have to recruit for as many people now, right?
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Posted: Mon Sep 14, 2020 9:23 am
It was ridiculous to feel any sort of flustered because of the stupid girl before him, but Liliane choked down a laugh, and Nataniel felt an uneasy heat creep into his cheeks. He may be misreading the delicate and nuanced tells of social interaction, but as he hadn't been trying to be funny, he had to assume the laughter was at his expense. Girls had always been... somewhat more difficult to figure out.
At her promise to 'keep things professional,' Nat grumbled out a, "See that you do." Though, admittedly, it was difficult to tell how serious she was, through the cheery tone of her voice.
The last time he'd given his number out, he'd been subjected to all manner of incessantly bubbly and harmless harassment. Nataniel probably should've thought more of giving his number to someone like Liliane. She did share a disturbing number of practices with December. Chattery pleasantries and trust of complete strangers, going so far as to take food from them.
This could be a mistake.
He swallowed to clear his throat and nodded stiffly at her words. "Make sure you remind me who you are when you message me, or I will likely block you." He turned, slinging his bag up onto his shoulder as he strode away, toward the shelves to find what he'd actually came for. "Have a good afternoon, Liliane. See you in class." There probably wasn't any reason to still feel uncomfortable and mistrustful. Liliane seemed like a 'good' person, not likely out to hurt anyone. But recognizing that didn't do anything for the bubbling discontent in Nat's stomach. There probably wasn't anything to do about it besides wait and see...
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Posted: Thu Sep 24, 2020 5:21 am
"Have a nice day!" She replied and afforded a small wave at his departing figure.
He really was a bit of a puzzle to her, he seemed to want to be sociable on occasions and at least tried to extend pleasantries even if they did come out stiff...but that didn't make the attempts any less important. Her smile was wry as she watched him go and once he had completely disappeared from view she returned to her own work.
All right, she didn't necessarily have much inspiration going for her at the moment but she was at least making progress on her project. She just needed to give herself another motivational push and she'd get to where she needed to go. By the time she was due in her next class she may have moved on to part three of this process and she'd be on the home stretch!
Her smile softened and with no further distractions nearby, she lifted her pencils and began to work once more.
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