[PRP] Long Days, Busy Lives (Levi x Jade) | Page 2 | ♥ In the Name of the Moon! ♥ | Guild Forums

Nuxaz

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Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 11:19 am

She closed her eyes, the heel of her palm pressing beneath her eye midrub so that she could take a moment to pretend like the world around her didn't exist and that it was just herself. It helped because when she opened her eyes and let herself look at the man she still, desperately, hatefully loved she could breathe evenly and the tears had stopped falling.

She stayed quiet as he talked, rocking slightly on the heels of her booties, and tried to focus on what he was saying instead of what she was feeling. Her emotions were a swirling vortex of complexities she didn't have the time to sort through.

"You should have picked a different time than this," she said softly, even managing to laugh when she scrubbed at her cheeks again. "You literally have the worst timing." Even though it hurt, there was almost the ghost of a smile on her lips before it slipped away. She tried not to focus on the familiarness of it all, fear a tight constraint around her heart.

She was still angry with him, still upset and heartsick but she also held this hope that maybe he was, truly, believably better. It made her want again and that was dangerous. "I don't know what to do or what I want-- I'm confused and," a slow exhale and she tried to brush loose strands out of her face to keep her hands busy. "You-- being back, being present. I don't know if that changes anything Levi, I don't." Her hand dropped to her side when she shrugged.

"I didn't think you'd be back," she admitted even as she watched him type on his phone.

Her eyes closed again and her chin lifted, Jade deciding she could allow him to clean up the makeup the tears he brought about ruined.

felyn

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 11:45 am

"I should have," he admitted as he brought the tips of his fingers up to hold her chin steady. The other reached gingerly to wipe at the corners of her eyes, fixing the crisp line of her liner and wiping away the smudges her tears and hands had created as she fought to regain control of herself. It wasn't hard to get all of it but the issue then was how red her face was from the scrubbing and how raw and tender she looked. It hurt to stare down at her like that, even with her eyes closed and shielding the worst of her pain from him.

"I just didn't think about it when I saw you. Honestly, I didn't even think I was going to make it a couple of times, so," he swallowed around the lump in his throat and dropped his hands from her face. The cold of the night air robbed his fingertips of the lingering warmth of her skin immediately and he mourned that only touch he had stolen for himself. "So when I finally saw you and I realized I had... made it through to the other side, I just felt like I should apologize. There's so much I want to say and do that I just..."

He frowned and shook his head, causing tufts of mossy hair to fall across his bright eyes.

"It doesn't matter. If you wanted me to fight to make this okay, I would, but I'm trying to respect your space. Well, mostly, I guess. Not right this second obviously."

He smiled then, trying to make the mood lighter with a small joke, but even he didn't really feel it.

"We should get going, though, before he sends someone to find us."

Nuxaz

Felyn

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Nuxaz

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Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 12:19 pm

He was gentler than she expected, when he cleaned up her makeup and when he pulled away she opened her eyes slowly, blinking a few times as everything settled back into place.

Her cheeks burn a little, red from her tears and the cold that still wrapped around them. She hoped it would help hide the fact that she'd been crying or that it wouldn't be obvious once they were back in the lowlighting of the club.

Luckily most of their clients were men and if she put on her best smile they wouldn't even notice anything was admiss. Especially if she focused on them. Men were great for that.

"I--" She stopped, shifting her weight because she had more she knew she could say if they had time. They never had time. "Later? We can maybe talk about it later." Jade forced herself to say it because it's what she wanted. She was completely and utterly terrified at the prospect of even marginally putting herself out there like this but she needed it.

Sighing, she adjusted her outfit and gestured at the roof access. "Let's not keep him waiting any longer."

felyn

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 12:28 pm

He drew a deep, quiet breath as she asked him to talk later; he didn't want her to see the spark of hope that fluttered to life, he didn't even want to admit that it was there to himself. If he became too hopeful that this might be the beginning of something then it would ruin every attempt he had made at being selfless. Recovering or not, he knew that he would only be able to handle so much of a dangling carrot before he gave in and of all the things he had let go of, all the vices and addictions he had turned his back on, Jade was the hardest thing to ignore.

"Absolutely," he agreed, steeling himself to a forced calm as he shoved his hands back into his pockets from reflex, "if you want to talk later then I'll be here. I promise."

Promises were not a thing he wanted to make lightly anymore but he knew this one was truth. If Jade asked for him, he would come. There wasn't an ounce of doubt that he was still hopelessly in love and, thus, hopelessly bound to her.

He stepped closer to the roof access and turned so he could step down onto the first rung. One last, whistful glance shot her way before he began descending.

"See you on the other side."

Nuxaz

Felyn

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Nuxaz

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Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 12:58 pm

The smile she gave him was a terse one. Her lips pressed firmly together and she had folded her arms over her chest again, drawing her jacket tightly around her like it was a security blanket. Jade had nothing left to say to him after he agreed and she watched as he descended.

Once she was alone on the rooftop, the woman took a moment to just breathe. They were shallow things that slowly developed into something long and deep until she felt steady enough to climb down the access herself.

Her nerves felt frayed, like the wrong thing could set her off again but she put on her best face and followed the pathway that Levi had undoubtedly taken back towards the lounge where they'd put on their best smiles and do what they were good at.

They could deal with everything else-- them, what they were or weren't to each other, and what they might be -- later. When she was more prepared and ready for it.

Right now, there was work to do and she could focus on that.

felyn

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