✦ Arima

[Sabra Knight]

Confusion

She twirled a strand of hair in between her fingers as she read over her journals. Ever since coming back from the desert adventure the girl had often been more prone to daydreaming. Right now for example Arima found herself repeatedly moving the same journal back and forth on the shelves in her healer’s tent. It was rather amusing for any soldier passing through to try and gain the Matori’s attention for a second only to find her looking away again with a small sigh. What was she supposed to do with herself? What did she even want to tell him? Why did she want to tell him anything? Ugh! Why hadn’t he just left her out there alone? She had just gotten over those weird feelings, but now she was all flustered to just see him in passing again! And it was so hard not to touch her lips just thinking about that kiss!

“Arima…earth to Arima.”

“Hrm?” Arima blinked her doll-like gaze towards one of the female soldiers at the camp.

“Are you even listening?” Tilting her head the Oban woman narrowed her gaze so that she could stare down at the smaller girl, “I was tellin’ you about the other day…where is yer head at, girl?”

“Sorry….I guess I didn’t sleep too well last night – not like that either!” Arima felt her cheeks burning, “I just have a lot on my mind and I’ve been so caught up with making up potions and recipes that I forgot to sleep.”

“If you say so.” The woman chuckled as she poked the Matori’s cheeks, “Seems you have more than potions on the brain unless you’re making a love spell? You know we saw when you left who left after you and who you returned with…”

“Stop right there.” Arima shook her head wildly before scooting away from her journals and walking towards the soldier, “I’m going to have to give you a full inspection if you have enough time to sit in here and yack all morning.”

“Ah, there’s that sass I love.” The woman grinned before standing and brushing some sand from her leather clothing, “As is you got that ointment ready? I need to get ready for an excursion and even something as hot as me can’t handle all that sun.”

“Hahah.” Arima replied lightly as she tossed a bag towards the other woman, “Just take care, okay?”

“Pfft you know it. I’m more worried about you not takin’ care enough. Don’t trust a man so easily, they’ll turn to scoundrels in the end! But a lady – I hear those are reliable. We women gotta stick together in more ways than one ya know. My tent’s always open, shimmer fish.” The woman winked mischievously before being pushed towards the open flap by Arima.

“Stop with your teasing and go ahead on your trip, Teha.”

Teha laughed, “Yes, yes. But seriously! They try to do anythin’ to you then you better let me know. I won’t have anything happen to you. Don’t want to lose our cutest healer just yet.”

Arima shook her head though a small smile decorated her face, “Thank you.”

“Seriously though….” Teha stopped so that she could bend forward and whisper in the Matori’s ear, “I hear he’s tougher than he looks. And speakin’ of looks I’ve noticed that they’ve been directed at you a lot lately – I would know since it’s my starin’ area too. I think you be wearin’ him down just a little bit, girl. But like I said if ya get tired of he’s stubbornness then I’m in the market still.”

“Tehaaaa.” Arima’s cheeks flushed even more, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Honest!”

“Mmhmm. Girl, if I was the one who could have your gaze light up like a sunrise when I come into a room I would have carried you away already. He’ll be a fool if he don’t act soon enough.”

“I don’t….”

“Suuure. And he don’t either. We must all have drank something in the water to be teasin’ you so. Must be a desert mirage or somethin’ that I’ve noticed.” She cackled before saluting the Matori, “As it is try to remember me when you’re done drooling over him, kay? Despite my jealously I suppose I’ll be rootin’ for ya. Want to see my shimmer fish happy after all.”

“Teha – just be safe, you goof.” Arima leaned against a support as the woman mounted a Xaraan and kicked up a sandstorm. Always one with a dramatic departure. The Matori smiled though before her mind went back to its confusing knots. Not that Teha had helped with that of course! She totally never drooled or had a starry gaze because of Saraf!

“Not that she ever said his name.” Arima let out a groan as her mind already slipped towards the Oban man in question. She didn’t! She couldn’t! He didn’t like her and she had duties! She had healing to focus on. Nothing so silly as wondering about how that man was doing! That was just ridiculous and totally not possible for either of them….never…ever…right? And even if she did like him – which she didn’t! – it wasn’t like she appealed to him, right? But he had come for her and then that night…Arima let out a sigh, “Dammit, their teasing really is getting to me lately!” She raised a hand to cover her lips. She was even talking like a soldier lately. The Matori let out a soft laugh before shaking her head.

What a mess.

But her thoughts didn’t get much time to settle as a courier came running into sight.

“Miss Arima a letter!”

A letter, but from whom and why?

(934)

Result Arima gets teased by soldier, Teha, while still in a daze about trying to sort out her own feelings about a certain Oban. Then before she can really think on things an urgent letter comes from home…

 

[Sabra Knight]

Sorrow

[This class quest shows that Arima is maturing. She is no longer hiding from the reality of the world - that her mother is dying and that she cannot simply work magic to save her - and instead realizes that no magical plant or miracle will save her mother. Death comes for all and Arima has begun to accept that despite her heavy heart. She will leave the desert camp of soldiers and leave behind her "childish" dreams of adventure and romance to go face the reality back at home so that she can spend some final moments with her ailing mother.]

Arima paced across her tent anxiously.

In her hands was a letter – one that previously crisp was now crumpled and smeared of its ink due to her constant touching and crying over it. Even now the girl would unfold it to look over it once more before crumpling it up in her hands. She wanted to throw it, to ignore that it even had ever existed in the first place. Oh! Why couldn’t she do that? Arima’s gaze brimmed with tears as she finally sat down to look over the letters one final time.

“Arima,

This is to notify you that your mother has taken another turn for the worse. I have been keeping her stable as much as possible, but perhaps it is time to cut your training session short. As much as she wishes to hide this from you I know that seeing your face is what she misses most. Perhaps the presence of her daughter will be more of a balm to her soul than anything else in this world. I am continuing to heal her, but as her breaths get shorter even I worry.

Should she depart this world shortly would you wish to know that you remained away and did not get to say your goodbyes? Nor could her spirit rest without giving you her blessings before she fades away. As a healer, this is what I prescribe to the both of you – some final moments together as I doubt another year may pass for her.

I ask this not as mentor, but as a dear family friend. Please come home and visit your mother, Arima.

Sincerely,

Koriyan”

Could it be some trick? An attempt to lure her away from her placement here in the desert? Using her mother as a bait to get her out of the desert and back into the manor? “No, I doubt that.” Arima sighed as she rejected her desire for this to be some cruel trick played by her mentor. It was a painful feeling but one that she had to deal with. If even Koriyan said that her mother’s time was near then it truly was.

But why? Arima clutched the letter to her chest as she hid in her tent from the rest of the world. She had come here to learn! She was supposed to come and learn so that she could go home and heal her mother! A sob escaped the girl as she sat on the floor and pulled her legs up against her chest, “I…I should have worked harder.” She managed in between ragged breaths. If only that flower had truly existed! She had went into that sandstorm looking for the flower – it could have healed her mother! In a land of magic why didn’t such miracles exist? Maybe she should go looking again? What if it could be there?

I could leave in the morning, before dawn, and look again. The thought though left her feeling empty. Saraf had even told her that the flower didn’t exist. What in the world had possessed her to even go out there to find such a thing? Her weak, foolish fantasy life? All those stories she had read as a child, all those adventure tales full of hope and miracles…they had just filled her head and made her do such silly things! What if she had died out there? What if Saraf had died trying to find her? What good was that whole adventure? She had nearly died to a Wildman and then the desert itself had tried to steal her away again. Arima’s gaze squeezed shut against the thoughts. She was a fool! There was no cure-all potion, she had learned that on her journey. Her stupid, stupid journey that she had taken instead of staying home to stay with her mother who missed her. Who needed her right now!

“She needs me right now.” Arima spoke out loud as she glanced around the tent. But didn’t the soldiers need her right now as well? This had become her new home and despite the constant teasing, the fights, the raunchy attitudes of some, and other things those ruffians were almost like a new family to the Matori. Her gaze lowered towards the ground thoughtfully. It wasn’t like they would fade away if she left, but then again her heart twisted. She had also gotten a lot closer to a certain one of them. Would he forget about her if she went home again? He seemingly hadn’t cared for her when she had lived as a lady before, but after working together they had bonded. They had even done more than that...but she pushed the memory to the side. She was still trying to figure out that situation on its own! Still, her heart ached at the thought of him forgetting her and moving on with his life. I was just figuring out my own feelings and I swear that he…no. Surely not.

But what was she to expect? Arima forced a small smile as tears escaped her gaze, “Another fantasy of mine.” Another story that she had to break away from. Her mother needed her. She could keep staying out here to figure out those things when it could be the last chance to see her mother. Oh, but it did hurt. It hurt a lot. Arima closed her eyes tightly again as she hugged her legs against her body. Feelings were so complicated! This was why she had always stayed with her books as a child. Let the characters in there have their adventures and figure out their own feelings. Why had she wanted to go out and become a heroine herself? To try and find some magical ending that would allow everyone she held dear to live happily ever after?

But no such ending would exist to spare her mother.

After a long few moments the thought settled in on her. While Arima felt like her body was much heavier and her heart weary she knew that she had to move. She had to leave her life of adventure and fantasy to go back to the reality – to the fact that her mother needed her. There was no magical plant that could instantly cure the Lady nor could Arima’s magic do much more than ease her pain. Life, after all, was not limitless – everyone had to pass into the next world eventually. Her mother was old and she had family calling to her from the other side surely.

“You can even find your true daughter again.” The thought made her voice hitch, “Will you forget me too?” Her mother could go on into the next life without her while she was leaving behind someone else that she had hoped would claim her. Someone to cherish her…that she could cherish. Arima pinched the bridge of her nose, “There I go again thinking about such silly dreams.” She didn’t need a knight in shining armor to save her – there would be no happily ever after.

There would just be life – the hard and bitter reality that brought people in and out of her path as easily as a wind blowing sand across the desert.

In the morning, she would set out before dawn. But this time it would not be in search of some magical flower or on some quest to find the answer to defeating death. Nor was it an attempt to run away from the reality of the life waiting back for her in the city. Instead it would be a journey of acceptance. A journey to see her mother in her final moments before Arima lost her forever.

At least she could work to try and extend her life a little longer and to ease her pain. So, she would don the attire of a lady again and try to let her mother see that she was living well. Even if it meant agreeing to things that she would have never done before Arima was determined to do it. Her mother needed some comfort after all. That way her mother’s spirit could at least be at peace when it passed on from this world into the next. She just hoped that by the time she would arrive back at her family’s manor that she could control the sorrow that was breaking her heart.

(1366)

Result Arima leaves the camp to return home to spend time with her ailing mother.

 

[Sabra Knight]

The Return

As the sands grew less and the grass grew more Arima knew that they were approaching the city. To be honest the girl actually was quite nervous about returning home. The closer she got to the city the more the girl felt like a complete stranger. Her outfit was dirty, her hair a bit more tangled than before, her face far more mature, and her walk stronger than the pretty dressed up delicate child who had left home months ago. If she had somehow managed to go back and time would her younger self even recognize this healer as her future self? Even if she wore the dresses again and washed her face free of the desert grime the girl still felt different. Her whole attitude against other was much more firm and that idealistic dreamer had been tamed by reality.

Her gaze could still shine but with the current situation around her Arima felt like her gaze was dull. Even her heavy heart was showing in the way that her lashes fluttered down constantly over her previously sparkling eyes and in the way that her breaths seemed more like sighs. I must put on a brave front. She took a deep breath before climbing down from her borrowed Xaraan, “Thank you for the ride.” The girl smiled faintly as she patted the creature’s beak. Maybe one day she would get her own familiar to ride. Possibly even a janarim though she was fond of how quickly the Xaraan could move through the sands. We’ll see.

She needed to stop distracting herself and head inside after all. At the thought Arima stared up at the manor that loomed above her. Had her home always seemed so big? Pressing a hand against the cold gate of iron the girl pushed and listened as it swung inwards. At least everything was still upkept. The grounds were as she recalled, well-tended with flowers blooming as a fountain flowed in the front courtyard, and there were even servants to meet her at the door. “Lady Arima! You’re back!” Shiya, a girl who had been living in the manor and had grown up with Arima, rushed forward to greet the healer, “Oh look at you!” She fussed as she patted at the sand that clung to Arima’s clothing, “You look like you’ve been through a storm or something. Look at all that tatter and your hair and oh! Even your hands are a bit rough…let’s get you cleaned up, okay?”

Arima smiled sheepishly, “It’s really not that bad, Shiya. I can take care of myself I just need to wash my face and perhaps change my clothing-”

”Just because you let yourself get whisked away into the desert for some soldiers does not mean I won’t care for you when you’re home.” The older Matori put a hand on her hip defiantly before tugging Arima through the front doors after her, “The Lady is resting as it is so you have time.” The last words made her voice break ever so slightly and Arima pursed her lips.

“How…how is she?” A knot formed in her chest as the question escaped her lips.

Pausing on the middle stairs of the grand staircase Shiya took a moment before glancing back towards Arima, “She’s still weak.” The Matori blinked against tears before glancing away, “We’re worried about her, but Lord Koriyan has been constantly in the manor attending to her. She’s not in pain, but her breathing is more ragged and it is rare to see her leave the house since the sun makes her falter.”

“Didn’t she have an attack?”

“Ah, yes. That’s what caused Koriyan to contact you. Her heart faltered the other day so he worried.” It was a piece of relieving news, but still one that made Arima’s heart twist. Her mother wasn’t in pain, but it was obvious that her body was becoming weaker at the same time. The healer shook her head, “So Koriyan is basically keeping her alive through magic and potions then.”

The statement brought even more silence as they finally moved up the steps and through the hallway. Arima found herself looking about at everything. The carpets were still the same, the portraits still seemed judgmental, and even the floral arrangements seemed almost similar to the ones she had left behind almost a year ago. I guess I’m the only one who is really different. Even Shiya seemed to have that same swing in her step as she led them to Arima’s old chambers.

“Here.” The Matori handed Arima a glass of water, “You are probably thirsty from your trip. There’s also a tray of food for you here in the room. Feel free to eat and relax while I run your bath. They brought most of the water up already so it should be only a few more moments.” Already Arima could see the steam rolling from the other room. Along with it came scents she hadn’t smelled in a while, fresh flower petals mixed with some nectar, and the girl found herself almost sneezing at the surprise of it. Had she gotten so accustomed to sand and sweat in just a few weeks? A light flush decorated her face as she shook her head.

It definitely had been something to live with the Outcast Unit. While her mentor had sought to punish her with her placement the girl had in a way found a home there. She twirled a loose curl thoughtfully. Koriyan had cleared her leave with their captain but in her rush the girl hadn’t even gotten the chance to say goodbye to anyone. Arima let out a soft sigh at the realization. Certainly she had thought of seeking out a certain someone, but to do that in the early hours of the morning…she would have to either interrupt training or be suspicious by coming out of his sleeping quarters that early. Her cheeks darkened at the thought. Definitely something she had run away from. I just hope he doesn’t get upset at me or forgets me.

As Shiya got her attention once more Arima found herself undressing and slipping into the warm waters of her bath. The comfort was immediate as she stretched out her legs and allowed the warmth of the bath to ease her aching muscles. Weeks of hard work and sleeping on the solid ground had both toughened her while wearing down her body at the same time. As a healer she highly recommended that all soldiers received some form of cot or something that could ease the detriments of the rougher camp environment. But perhaps that was simply because she had been so spoiled for so long that such simple things were bothersome to her. Even this bath, its luxury obvious in the scented oils and herbs that decorated the surface of the water, was something that others could only dream of. Perhaps they would see it as wasteful. She thought idly as she traced a finger through the waters. Would Saraf consider this a waste of time? Her cheeks, all the way along the back of her neck to her finned ears as well, flushed lightly as she thought once more of the Oban. How could she not think of him? They had been so close to something, shared so many kisses and now...now it looked like she had run away from him.

Letting out a sigh the Matori woman leaned her head back against the smooth masonry that decorated her bath. Her curls, damp and clinging to her pale skin, shifted with the movement and she had to flick some strands to the side as she studied the ceiling of her home. My home. Arima closed her eyes briefly at the thought as she realized how strange the concept seemed. The Outcast Unit felt more like a home than this place. This place was quiet, too void of life for her own comfort. The other place was rough yes, but it was vivid and so alive.

To think that her mentor had sent her there as punishment instead. If only he had realized how much that place would mean to her once she had settled in with the Unit! Her lips curled up into a smile as she reminisced about that conversation with Koriyan, how she had finally managed to twist his strings and frustrate him to giving into her wishes to do more as a healer.

“What? You don’t think I’m tough enough, do you?” Arima protested as she chased after her mentor through another of his long and elegant hallways, “Don’t ignore me!” She was balancing scrolls and books in her arms as she darted around corners and doorways after the older Oban, “Please?”

“I’m pretty certain that I told you I needed poultices and more herbs gathered.” Finally a response! Not one that made Arima happy in the least, but at least he was acknowledging her presence again.

“I’m done making these orders for you. Can’t I actually go out and experience some things now?” Arima protested again as she dropped the load of books on a desk in his office, “I’ve already read through so many of these as well.”

“I’ve taken you on visits before.”

“Rarely.” Arima pursed her lips in frustration, “Sometimes I have to wonder if you want me to actually do anything beneficial or if I’m just a main support for your finances considering how much you make on my potions.” Not that it was technically true, but still! She wanted to become a healer not some potion master. All of this grinding herbs and mixing drinks and making ointments for this and that was so exhausting. Even the patient girl was tired after a couple of weeks of it. It was to the point that she had seen a patient without his knowledge – something that had resulted in his prior lack of communication towards her this day.

Finally with her daily protests and even her refusal of dinning with her mentor -she would refuse to do so until he started treating her like a true healer and not some delivery service girl!- Arima found her answer, “Fine. Let’s get you that experience you deem so necessary.”

And with that stated he had sent her to the Outcast Unit. At first she had been terrified, bullied and teased by others, but the longer she stayed the more she proved her determination and spirit until they were teasing her out of love instead of hate. She had for a time been accepted by them and had learned how to tease in turn. She also had learned how to love while there. Who would have thought that possible?

Letting her body sink a bit more under the water Arima simply drifted there, lost in her thoughts, until a quiet voice reached out for her, “Lady Arima?” As Arima’s eyes slowly flickered open the Matori noticed that Shiya was staring at her, her golden gaze full of worry and curiosity, . “Is everything alright?” She questioned softly as she knelt on the floor, a towel in her hands for Arima, “You barely touched any food and have been in here for a while.”

“I’m...doing okay.” Arima replied, her mind struggling with all the possibilities of what she could confide in her friend, “Honestly, I-” She began before slowly biting at the inside of her cheek with hesitation, “Have you ever been in love Shiya?” The question was met with wide eyes and a pause before finally a slow nod answered the sudden question.

“Yes, but it was a brief meeting. Why do you ask such a thing?”

“I...think I may be in love.” Oh it felt so wonderful to confess such a thing! Even if she had to beg Shiya not to tell anyone else Arima was so relieved to have the words finally escape her lips, “Just don’t tell mother yet but I’m struggling with trying to find out how I should react?” She shook her head, “He’s not a bad man either and Mother actually had me go on a date with him a while back. It just turned out that he is a Captain in the Unit that I was assigned to as a healer. My mentor meant to test me, to try to punish me for insolent behavior but instead he assigned me to work with this man that made my heart flutter!” Her gaze was shining as the words just spilled from the depths of her heart, “I always caused him so much trouble yet we ended up finding each other time and time again. It’s like fate, no?”

Shiya smiled and reached out so that she could clasp Arima’s hands, “That’s wonderful! You always enjoyed those stories of yours so I truly hope he can be that knight for you! Have you even told him?” She frowned as Arima quickly shook her head, “Ah, I see then. So you’re torn about how to tell him?”

As she left the bath, her steps dripping water across the tiled floor, Arima shifted into the towel that her friend held out for her. It was soft, truly luxurious against her tired body, and for a moment Arima did have to admit that she did miss certain aspects of the finer life. This bath, the softness of her bed and the cool silks that she wore were only a few things that she couldn’t afford to entertain in the wilderness of the desert. It made a soft sigh escape her lips though that was more so at the acknowledgement that she truly was struggling with her desire to tell Saraf of her feelings, “I am. I mean I suppose he does like me back now, but I’m so afraid. What if I do something wrong?”

“What is love without the risk?” Shiya grinned as she followed Arima into the bedroom and prepared to help her with one of those silk dresses. A lovely indigo with golden embroidery and a long outer layer of nearly see-through material that was decorated with small crystals sewn into the fabric, “I suppose it may be bold of me to say but if he truly makes your heart flutter then you should go for it.”

“Thank you.” As Arima sat and allowed Shiya to braid her hair the Matori pursed her lips thoughtfully, “Like always you give the best advice. I’m just being fearful and with mother sick I wanted to focus on her...I hope he didn’t think I simply ran away.”

“If he truly cares for you then it will happen. The fates, On’os included, are good at pulling things together.” Shiya murmured comfortingly before finishing the last twist of the braid and clasping the hair with a golden pin, “Despite the harshness of the outside world you still manage to be a beautiful flower, Arima.”

“You’re too sweet.” Her cheeks flushed Arima reached up so that she could pull down the other Matori’s arms for a hug, “I truly missed you Shiya.”

As I did you.” Shiya smiled as she brushed a light kiss across the top of Arima’s head, “Are you ready to meet the Lady now?”

Glancing in the mirror Arima studied her reflection, her fingers tracing out the outline of her face thoughtfully. Had her cheekbones always been so sharp before? Or was that simply from how much baby fat she had lost over the years while training as a healer? It wasn’t a bad image, just one that definitely accented her pale features and showed that she was no longer that child from all those years ago who lived locked up in a tower. She just hoped that her mother could see that as well. Taking a deep breath Arima straightened her shoulders and pushed away from her vanity, “I know the way, Shiya so you may rest now.”

“Are you certain? You know I’m always here for you.”

Arima smiled and reached out once more to embrace her friend, “I know that and I truly appreciate it. You’ve already helped ease my mind so much and in less than an hour of me being home! You’re truly the best, Shiya. Seeing to my mother, however, is something that I must do alone. If I’m not brave now then how will I be able to manage the risks of love when the time comes?” The pale Matori shook her head, the chimes in her braided hair ringing, and then ever so carefully so walked towards the doors that barred her room from the outside. It took a moment of resolve as she pushed the doors open, but once she had done so Arima braced herself and gracefully walked down the hallway.

At the end of it would be her mother’s room. On either side of the ornate doors there were tapestries, one golden and crimson in the colors of Oba with a great Xaraan embroidered on it and the one on the right side a deep indigo with gold and black embroidery that made up a janarim. Her father had always been so proud of these tapestries and her mother had them both hung so that his memory could linger even more in their manor. It was a sight that made her remember his note to her from all those years ago. At first she had mistaken his intentions by thinking that he had desired to get rid of her but then that note had shed light on how kind his heart truly had been,

“Yes, I may have started a search at first to find someone to claim you, but do not mistake my later intentions girl. I could have easily finished this search and had away with you if I had chosen to do so. If I am still around then I can explain better, but this was to give you another choice. I know that our lifestyle is harsh and for an outsider may seem stifling. I do not wish for you to be bound by something you do not choose to do. This is so that if you ever wish….go and live freely. Live your life and do not worry about my wife – sometimes when seeking what she believes is best for another she will forget to even look at their own desires. So this….daughter…is for you. For that day when you believe all hope is lost and you do not have either of us – we are older and I will acknowledge that time takes its toll on all eventually and for the two of us that is especially so. You will have something waiting for you out there so do not think that these stone walls have to encage you forever, Arima. But no matter what you must remember that above all you are still and forever my daughter and as per both of our wishes the heiress of this house should you choose.”

That was right. Despite everything she had her father’s blessing and she was his daughter, if not by blood then by spirit and love. They had taken her in as a baby and she knew no one else. That was why she had opted to stay in Oba, to do her healing nearby and to not think once of going to Oba. Whatever family had once been there was lost to her, they had tossed her aside while these Obans had embraced her fully as their own. She would never forget that and no one else would ever replace her parents in her heart. Blood or not they were her true kin.

And she would be here for her mother. It was why she had decided to leave the Unit and to turn her back on that love which had almost been hers. That determination was what caused her to push on the doors so that they swung open with a quiet creak and it was her spirit that kept her expression from crumbling into tears as she dashed forward to kneel at her mother’s bedside, “Mother.” Arima whispered as she reached out to take a delicate hand, the dark skin naturally smooth despite the age that had created the wrinkles in the Oban’s expression, “How are you?”

“Arima.” The name was gentle as a hand moved to clasp her own, “My dear daughter you’ve finally come home.” A pale gaze, the color of faded roses, peered at Arima and the elder forced a small smile, “I’m glad to see that you are well.”

Arima forced a laugh, “Of course! What else would you expect? I’m not one to fade away easily, Mother.” She clutched at that hand, her lifeline to the woman she treasured the most, and leaned forward on the bed so that she could be closer to the Lady, “How are you feeling?”

“Weak.” The Oban woman smiled, her expression full of exhaustion, “But alive. Koriyan has been treating me well so I should be able to walk again soon.”

“Th-that’s great news.” Arima forced back the tears as she studied her mother, “Rest assured both Koriyan and I will do our best to help you recover.”

Her mother’s eyes flickered closed, a tired sigh escaping the painted lips, “I suppose that is our hope. Still I wanted to see you for a bit just in case. There’s so much I need to tell you, so much about this estate for you to handle, and while I would have loved to see you with another by your side I suppose you tossed away all the suitors I desperately tried to find.”

Arima’s cheeks flushed and she quickly shook her head, “That’s the last thing for us to worry about, Mother. I’m here for you and I’m quite capable. If I find someone then I find someone, if not then you konw that I will be fine.” She squeezed her mother’s hand, “I promise.” After a pause the Matori found herself forcing a smile, “As it is you’ll be around for at least another decade before I even dare worry about not finding a suitor. I’m not going anywhere nor are you, not anytime soon.”

Her mother could only laugh, the noise raspy and causing her to cough, “I see.” She finally managed as she weakly squeezed her daughter’s hand back in return, “Then I should allow you to doctor me so that can be the case.”

Arima nodded, “Of course.” She moved, her silks moving like flowing water as she shifted upwards, and Arima bent over the Oban so that she could place a kiss at her brow, “And you may not have to worry so much….I may find a suitor just yet. A respectable man.” She whispered quietly before tucking back a stray strand of crimson hair tinged silver from her mother’s face, “But for now you should rest. I’ll check in with Koriyan and see about what type of herbal tea and soup I can make for you tonight.” Saying her farewells the Matori slipped from the room and unlike how she would have crumpled in the past she made it, her shoulders and spine straight as she stood tall, all the way to the kitchen where she could meet with her mentor and discuss remedies and other things.

There was no time for crying, no time for mourning over potentially lost love. She was determined to save her mother after all.

[4017]

 

[Sabra Knight]

Feelings

Saraf had returned to her.

Arima felt almost too giddy as she flew up the stairs towards her room. Others would have wondered what the rush was but the Matori quickly locked the doors of her room so that she could bounce into her bed and laugh into her pillows. It was like all the stress, all the worry had simply been melted away in that moment. And to think that she had been bold enough to demand her payment of kisses! Her face could burn through the pillows at the thought of her actions! A long time ago the Matori would have simple hid behind a book, mumbled an apology and then would have proceeded to run far, far away from any such flirtations! Yet she had totally instigated their whole affair today!

It was great.

Joy along with those other wonderful feelings of delight and love caused her heart to bounce to a whole new rhythm in her chest. She was completely in love! The healer wiggled across her bed as she clutched a pillow to her chest. I wonder how Mother will react...oh I hope she likes him! Of course she would! Arima closed her eyes as she squeezed the pillow to her chest. Not only did Saraf like her but Koriyan was working wonders with her mother! Certainly the Lady was still frail, but she was alive and well. Arima just had to keep an eye on her and then perhaps if things settled she could go back to becoming a healer for the soldiers again. Anything to be close to Saraf again, right? It was a teasing thought and one that she couldn’t resist.

She just prayed that she had been correct in trusting him like this. He had her whole heart in his hands and should he dare crush it then she didn’t know what to do. Focus completely on healing studies for the rest of her life? Never let anyone close again? Not that she wanted to worry about such things. Saraf had always saved her before after all and she doubted that he could ever harm her in such a way. Shiya was right - falling in love was definitely a risk but truly worth the reward. She just prayed that the gods would continue to bless them.

But how did she bring it up to Mother? And what did she do now? They knew they liked each other but he was still with the Unit and she was still tending to her studies of healing and to helping her mother’s recovery. Did they simply wait and steal kisses here and there as they could? Arima rolled over onto her side as she fought through the swirling thoughts that threatened to make her dizzy. There truly was just so much to think about when it came to these things! It was scary how much her life was changing because of one man...but it was also still a very, very wonderful feeling.

[506]

 

[Sabra Knight]

Merging

She was running through the desert, staff in hand as she cast spells to defeat the monsters lingering in the shadows. Nothing scared her! If her companions were injured then she would be the one to heal their wounds and she would be the one to protect them. She was strong, brave and most importantly free. At least that was how Arima felt until she woke up with her face pressed against the pages of her book.

Like any typical morning. Arima sighed as she quietly placed the book next to her bed and shifted so that she was away from the warm blankets and striding across the cool stone tiles of her room to prepare for the day. If anything her reality that once was like that adventure had been stowed away for the past several years with the sickness of her mother and the arrival of her sons.

And speaking of her mother.. Arima hurried as she tossed her long braid over a shoulder and dressed so that she could quickly prepare her mother's morning medicine. While Koriyan had originally protested against Arima creating her own medicine for her mother it eventually became evident that she had figured out something he had never thought of. Over time Arima had perfected brewing the particular herbal blend of roots, consisting of many typical herbs save for one that she herself had learned to extract juice from that would allow blood to flow easier through ones system. It was perfect for the Lady who had a weak heart and as long as she wasn't cut or injured in that manner there were few consequences to dabbling with such medicine. It along with other remedies and a bit of magic had done wonders for the Oban noble.

Even Koriyan had reduced his number of medical visits to once a month, something drastically less than how he once stayed at the manor to check on Arimas mother daily if not by the hour. It truly was a sign that the worst time had passed for the illness and that things were calming down.

As Arima worked she pondered over everything that had happened in the past few years. Once she had come to the manor for her mother, now she was herself a mother of twin boys and her life seemed vastly different from how she had been before. Not that she was complaining it was just that despite everything she still felt as if her mother didn't understand what she could do. Her healing was important to her, she no longer was Koriyans apprentice yet her mother stilled viewed her as some minor healing aid to the Oban lord. Arima pursed her lips before taking one of the porcelain cups from her mother's favorite tea set. It was painted a sky blue with golden flowers sprouting from the handle, their vines decorating the upper rim of the expensive tea set. In a sense Arima could relate to those delicate flowers, while fragile they were still very intricate in their design and their beauty made one almost afraid to utilize them. In a way her mother had once viewed her to be like one of those fragile pieces as she showed her off while holding her at bay for fear that using her daughter or rather letting her daughter use her own abilities would break her. Odd how such a realization could come across at a random time like this. The thought caused a faint smile to flicker over her features as she finished the medicine and mixed it in with the tea.

Standing she took the tray towards her mother's favorite spot in the garden. It was there that Arima greeted the lady and began pouring the tea. As she worked she glanced around at the area surrounding the two of them. All around them were tall bushes, ones that bloomed beautifully in the warmer months, and along the stone laid path we're vines that sprouted small white flowers even in the colder times. Other vivid flowers of varying colors were planted to bloom in the warmer months but for now the garden was muted in colors that kept mostly to greens and teals with splotches of white and indigo throughout. Arima knew the pattern well as she had spent years growing up in the seclusion of this garden and now that she had settled back into her childhood home the Matori once more spent many hours here studying over tomes and practicing her healing. That was when she wasn't simply spending time with her mother as she now was.

As her mother drank the medicine Arima couldn't resist asking, "How are you feeling today?" Over the years it had simply become a habit to ask.

"I'm feeling much better." The Lady replied with a soft smile as she glanced to her daughter, "That is as long as the boys aren't destroying something new." It was a slight tease but one which had Arima's cheeks flushed. If anything she knew her sons definitely could be a handful. Not that she would have them any other way but still it did make her worry about how her mother was handling them. At the though the Lady reached out a hand, almost as if she could read Arima's thoughts, and as she patted her daughters shoulder the Oban smiled, "In all honesty I think having the boys here strengthened me. I've surprised everyone, including myself, with how long I've managed to hold on and recover."

Arima let a soft sigh escape her lips as she handed her mother the teacup that was now full of a golden tea adorned with white petals, "well I for one am thankful that you managed to surprise us all." She replied as she settled into a seat across from the Lady.

"As it is Koriyan has told me that I've earned a few years back."

Arima nodded, "Here's hoping that you can live for more than just a few more years." Her expression was sincere as she studied her mother, "Once you have finished your morning medicine do you still wish to visit town?"

"Of course."

As their morning breakfast ended Arima and her mother headed to the market. It was a fairly typical day the cooler temperatures bringing more merchants from foreign lands who drew the attention of the crowds with their new wares. While her mother browsed Arima stayed by her side to make certain that everything was alright and that no stranger pressed too closely against them. She was far less worried about pick pockets and more concerned about someone accidentally harming her mother. Though speaking of pickpockets...Arima could only sigh as she noticed a commotion towards the other side of the street. It appeared that someone was being accused of theft and they were not being peaceful about it. A fight was soon to stir, something that had Arima navigating her mother away from the growing mess. That was until she heard the screams and her blood ran cold as she slowly turned her gaze back to the crowd.

A child, possibly no more than twelve, had been injured during the scuffle. While others watched, some rushing forward helplessly to try and help the boy, others were simply frozen in shock. What had happened? It had been so quick! All one woman knew was that she had been trying to move away from the commotion when suddenly the man had turned and grabbed at the boy with a knife! He had used the boy as a distraction, harming him in the side at the same time, before darting away from any potential guards.

"He's dying! Can't someone help?"

The pleas had Arima untangling her mother's fingers from her own, "I'll be right back, I promise."

"But what if that thug is still there and you get harmed as well? Just let a healer deal with him."

"It doesn't matter, not when a life is on the line. And for the record I am a healer, Mother. Don't forget that."

And as soon as she got the the boy Arima's whole demeanor changed. No longer was she the quiet noble lady her mother always saw but instead she was transformed into a bold leader, one who commanded the crowd and worked hard to save the boy's life. Magic could stall the bleeding take him from a critical place but it could not completely heal him on the spot. So she demanded bandages, certain herbs for a paste, and plenty of space so that once she had him stabilized her could slowly be moved to a place to rest.

"Take him home, he's not to get out of bed for at least two whole days and make certain to reapply this every evening after changing his bandages." She instructed the woman who took him before a final spark of magic left her fingertips to give him some more life. He would be fine thankfully but had she not intervened...well Arima was thankful that she had been there. Not only for the boys sake but for her own. She had forgotten what it felt like to be in a situation of such urgency and she was glad to realize that she still had the reactions and skills necessary to save a life.

She just hoped that she hadn't upset her mother too terribly by rushing into the situation as she had. Arima let out a sigh of relief as she spotted the Lady buy it was awkwardly quiet on the ride home. Both she and her mother were lost in thought,something that did not change as they went their separate ways upon arriving home.

It wasn’t until late in the evening, once Arima had retired to her chambers for the night, that a faint knock gained her attention. Raising a brow as she was curious about who could be calling at such a late hour the Matori pulled her robe about her shoulders and slowly moved towards the door which she opened slowly, “Mother?”

“Arima.” Her mother gestured and Arima moved to let her into the room, “I’m sorry for the late night intrusion but I wanted to discuss something with you.”

“Ah.” Arima shifted awkwardly as she watched her mother, “If it’s about this afternoon then I truly do apologize but as a healer I have a duty to-”

“It’s alright, my child.” Her mother let out a soft laugh, her lips curling upwards ever so slightly as she moved to go sit on Arima’s bed, “Please come sit with me. I hope you do not mind.”

“I don’t!” Arima answered quickly, her cheeks ablaze from her own startled outburst, “Make yourself comfortable.” In turn she too sat on the bed and waited for her mother to begin.


After a moment of drawn out silence, something that had Arima feeling ever so antsy, her mother finally began to speak, “In all honesty I have a confession to make. Until today I never realized how much my little girl has grown….I know that you are a mother but I always tried to steer clear of any realizations on how strong you are. All those years protecting you had instilled in me an image that you were something like a fragile flower, something to be kept safe. Even when you left I held true to that illusion and once you returned I credited everything that had brought you safely back home to your husband’s strength and even to the will of the gods - just never your own.” She bowed her head sadly and Arima could only reach out so that she could hold her mother’s hands comfortingly.

“Mother…”

“No, it’s true. You tried so hard to prove yourself to me but I always focused on what Koriyan was doing. Your remedy is what helped me to recover from my sickness and it’s time that I acknowledge that my little girl has grown up.” She smiled, her gaze glimmering with tears as she looked up to study her daughter. A loving hand reached to tuck away one of Arima’s curls and rested there on the side of the Matori’s head as the Oban carefully weaved some loose strands back into place, "I know that in the past we did not exactly see eye to eye on your future but now that I've seen your capabilities, how strong you truly are and how you have even saved my life I wanted to offer you your freedom." She hesitated a slight frown showing disapproval of the word that rang too true with the past of Oba and Matori, "Perhaps freedom is not the most accurate word but I simply want you to know that I'm proud of what you do and that if your dreams take you away from this house then so be it. The boys are older and I can take care of them, they have a home here as do you and Saraf. Yet I cannot keep you from your duties as a healer any longer. What if there’s more injured as that boy was? Who will save them?”

Arima found her gaze burning as a few tears began to slip from the corner of her eyes, “You’re acting like you want to send me far away on some epic quest.” She managed to speak finally as she tried to sort through the offer that her mother was giving her, “I appreciate it I truly do, but what….what of being here?” She shook her head as she finally started to see the bigger picture, “Always I divided myself between my healing arts and my life as your daughter, Mother.” Arima took a deep breath, “As tempting as it is to want to go on more adventures I know that I can no longer do that, not without missing everyone and everything I have here.” She squeezed her mother’s hands, “In fact, I think it’s better if I do stay. I want to learn how to merge those two identities. You saw my healer side today and I am so sorry if it startled you into thinking that you had been the one holding me back. In all honestly I was the one at fault. I never took the time to consider how I could be the very same person both here and there. I always divided myself but now I think I realize that it’s fine for me to be both a noble and a healer. To be myself.”

No more worrying about the disdain of the higher class for dirtying her hands and no more letting the teasing of others about her noble heritage stop her work as a healer, “Truly if you would give me your blessing I would like to try starting a new path. I’ll work with the Army if needed but I think my true goal may be to train future healers, to start a school and to share knowledge. I cannot do it alone though so if you would bless me with support I would gladly begin this new path.”

Her mother reached out to embrace her, “Of course.”

Smiling against the older woman’s shoulder Arima knew that she had made a good decision. Admittedly it was a bit scary to think of what she would need to do to accomplish such a huge goal but she was tired of hiding from herself. Of trying to rotate between healer and noble daughter. It was time to finally shine as who she was. Just as she had finally showed her mother how daring she could be today she would soon show the whole world all that she was capable of. That much Arima was determined to do.

[2629]

Summary

This solo demonstrates how far Arima has come in her life. She is no longer the quiet child that she once was and has indeed blossomed into a brave woman. She has always placed others before herself and skirted about her role as a noble heiress by separating her life as a healer from Lady Arima. That is until the day she has to transition before her mother by removing her protective hold over her hand (a metaphor for how protective her mother is of her whole life, something that she had simply accepted until this moment when she finally moves away from her mother to show who she truly is) so that she could move forward into danger.

That moment in which Arima makes her decision shows that she is willing to no longer hide who she truly is. Now with her mother's blessing she is beginning to merge the two identities to find a balance with who she is.