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 Posted: Sun Mar 20, 2016 9:37 am
He shook his head as Corvus's hand pulled back, biting his lip, and said, "Sorry, it's - it's not you, don't worry about it. I just...have a hard time with that sort of thing lately."
There had been a time when it would have been him placing the reassuring hand on someone's shoulder; kissing a hand or a cheek in greeting, offering an embrace. But now it felt overwhelming and exhausting, and Celsus felt too on edge, too uncertain of anything to offer more of himself than he was capable of.
Still, Corvus was meaning well, and she was trying. They both were.
"You're a fair lot better than some of these other people," said Celsus, with a low laugh. He shook his head, absently smoothing fingers through his short hair.
"I am too," he said, and then his voice dropped a little, lower and softer, "I was so - I thought he would forget us, forget me, but he didn't. He's still - he doesn't remember being Lieutenant Cerussite, or anything about that part of his life, so he gets a little scared now and then, but he's got Eurydike and me to help with that."
Celsus eased out a breath. "It is a little strange that we've now got different names, in spite of being twins; though I suspect he'll take Eurydike's last name when they marry, anyway, so perhaps the point is moot."
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Posted: Sun Mar 20, 2016 10:01 am
"I'll take that as a compliment." That brought a smile to her lips as she stooped down to snag the thermos before tugging herself back up onto the tubing so that she could settle into a seat beside the Knight of Chronos once more. She listened to him as she unscrewed the cap, filling it with some of the tea before holding it out to him. Corvus had brought a vanilla chamomile with her that night, blended with a touch of oolong with a light accent of marigold. It was sweet, but not overwhelmingly so, and it generally reminded her of calmer times. "You don't forget the ones who are truly important to you. Not really." Not ever, no matter how much you wished you would sometimes. "I know that corruption makes us forget. I -- There was one point where I was desperate enough to think that would be the best way to cope; that forgetting was the only way to escape from everything, from myself. I didn't know that purification did, but I suppose that makes sense, given the threat it could pose. Balance." Corvus glanced at him again before looking out over the park. "I'm sure it's hard, especially because you're twins. You've spent your entire lives being there for one another. It's alright to think it's strange. He's lucky to have you, and Eurydike."
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Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2016 2:42 pm
He gave Corvus a wan smile, tired around the edges. "I was terrified he would forget, though," Celsus said. "I thought - but, I'd rather have him clean of Chaos and not remember me than stuck with them. I didn't even know if I could pull him out of there."
He could not say he didn't understand the sentiment. Celsus couldn't quite bring himself to admit that he too had tried to corrupt himself as well, to forget; but he understood, and he nodded, his lips pressed together as he accepted the offered cup of tea.
"I wasn't too fond of Eurydike in the beginning, to be honest," said Celsus, as he took a sip. The tea was warm and soothing against his throat, but he winced at his own memories. "I wasn't...I hadn't even known that my brother was...that he preferred men until then."
He gave a slow shake of his head. "But he's happier than I've ever seen him with Eurydike, and I trust them both, even if it's...still all a bit new to me."
Celsus eased out a breath that was half a resigned sigh.
"We're all just trying to put one foot in front of the other now, aren't we all?"
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Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2016 6:20 pm
"Most of us, it seems." She nodded before taking a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment as she released it. "It's at least a relief to know that we aren't alone while taking that first step. It might seem like we are, sometimes it might be a struggle to convince ourselves that we aren't -- But there's someone there. Eurydike, Emrys, Denebola. It sounds like you have a pretty decent crew." She smiled softly, leaning over to lightly brush her shoulder against his before settling back into her own space. "It's good to have people to trust in your life. I-- I'd forgotten what that was like until recently myself." It wasn't really about her, though, and it was easy enough to redirect the conversation back to Celsus so that she could avoid having to face her own personal thoughts and feelings on things. "Was he afraid to tell you? About his preferences? Or was it just not something that came up?" She had grown up as an only child; the closest she'd had to a sibling being her cousin, Lucien, or possibly even Demetri, as they'd known each other for what felt like most of their lives. Relationships just hadn't come up in their conversations, possibly because they had been younger; teenagers just on the verge of starting to explore such things. "Are you seeing anyone?" She teased lightly, glancing at him with an impish grin in hopes that he would catch on that she was trying to be light-hearted.
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Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2016 9:05 am
If he had been himself, if he had been the person he'd been once upon a time, Celsus would have knocked his shoulder against Corvus's, maybe put an arm around her in a reassuring squeeze. But his fingers instead remained in his lap, his casted ones throbbing a bit as he tried not to let those terrible, blackly twisted emotions get the better of him once more.
"You forgot yourself," Celsus pointed out now, and felt the smallest sliver of relief that it was Corvus who let their shoulders touch; he restrained (well, he thought) the desire to pull immediately away and managed it, reminding himself that it was a touch of comfort and reassurance. "You're a part of my 'team' as well, Corvus."
She had been as supportive as Denebola had, in different ways. Celsus shook his head slowly, his face a little pained.
"I'm sure he was," he said, and winced again. "I wasn't...I wasn't exactly...supportive of, you know..." He waved a hand, a flush of embarrassment on his face. It was shameful, really, how he'd once been. "I used to, you know, call things gay if they were stupid, or whatnot. I didn't know any better."
He swallowed hard past the lump in his throat. "But Emrys, he...I've never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at Eurydike. He hasn't even broken out of his shell since the accident he had three years ago, I thought - I thought he'd never come around again, and Eurydike, he...pulled him out of that. They're like two sides of the same coin."
He'd resented it at first, been angry, saddened, frustrated. Eurydike had been able to do what Celsus had not, and that was save Tolliver - save Rhys. It had eaten away at him, the guilt, the shame, the agony of being useless, of being pathetically unable to do a damned thing.
Celsus tugged absently on one of golden coins. "They're going to be married, though, and I'll have another brother," he said, and his tone was almost wondrous, as though he could hardly believe such a thing."
Corvus's question dragged him out of his thoughts, however, and Celsus turned his head a little too fast to look at her, wincing at the dizziness that accompanied the sharp snap. But she was grinning at him, and he felt the tension ease from his shoulders, Celsus's expression relaxing into a smile, even if it was a little tired around the edges.
"Who can see anyone when I've got you lot constantly dogging my heels?" he deadpanned.skye starrfyre WOW HELLO LONG POST OF FEELS
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Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2016 5:09 pm
Both of her brows lofted as she glanced at him, her teasing grin turning into a look of surprise. It then shifted into delight as she laughed, shaking her head slowly. "Why Celsus, I didn't know you had it in you. A joke! What will the people say?" It was likely a silly thing to linger on when he had left himself exposed, but she didn't want him to think that it all had to be seriousness if he didn't want to linger on it no matter how much she was enjoying the way he was opening up; getting to know a little bit more about him. "I'm happy for them -- Happy for you too. Family is important." Sometimes it was the family you were born into, other times it was the family you built. Having pushed her own family away the more involved she became in her 'night life', she was only starting to realize how much she missed what she had cut herself off from. It wasn't something that she could take back, not wanting to put her parents in danger because of what she faced, but hearing the way Celsus spoke of Emrys and Eurydike gave her hope. Just as talking to Denebola the first day they had met as civilians had given her hope. They didn't have to be alone. "Celsus -- Thank you." It was hard to say exactly what she was thanking him for, but she felt the need to and so she'd said it before reaching out to pull a Twizzler out of the package, still smiling around the end she stuck into her mouth.
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Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2016 6:48 am
He turned to look at her, amused in spite of himself.
"I do make jokes every now and then, you know," said Celsus dryly, but he felt some of the tension in his shoulders easing somewhat. He let himself relax slightly, and even went so far as to gently nudge his shoulder against Corvus's, though the contact was brief.
But he appreciated her attempts at making him feel comfortable, because it was working.
"Family is very important," said Celsus agreeably, except he turned to look at Corvus now, his brows drawing together.
"For what, exactly?" he asked, thoroughly bemused; he could not think of a single thing that he had done for her to thank him - in fact, he was relatively sure that it should be the other way around. Celsus should have been thanking Corvus.
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Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2016 7:23 pm
Corvus sucked on the end of the Twizzler for a moment before taking a small bite, chewing and swallowing before speaking. "For reminding me that things get better, for smiling and maybe for remembering to meet me here?" Her brow lofted as she tilted her head towards him, smile still on her lips. She could probably thank him for a number of things, but those three were enough for now. "Smiles go rather well with that change of uniform, anyways. It makes you seem brighter." The Senshi of Vengeance shook her head after saying that, laughing softly at herself. "Sorry, that probably sounded like the worst cosmic pickup line, given the markings you've got. It wasn't intentional, promise."
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Posted: Mon Apr 04, 2016 12:59 pm
He reached across and plucked a Twizzler from the bag, mostly so he could just have something to do with his hands.
"You're welcome," said Celsus, his expression flickering a little; while it was tired, there was a slight smile on his face, wan and exhausted, but still a smile. He bit into the end of the candy and chewed slowly, absently rubbing his fingers over the marks on his neck.
"Yes, well," he said, a little. "I've heard - and said - worse. And I think my Transcendence marks are brighter now, as well, with the Oath mark in place. Or something."
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Posted: Tue Apr 05, 2016 10:44 pm
"Transcendence, hm? Is that what it's called?" Celsus had been the first person that she had seen with the softly glowing marks; the only one, really, that she recalled paying much attention to. Her limited experienced with Knights had lead her to brush it off as something specific to them, but now she was curious. "Do they, the markings, feel any different? I-- You don't mind questions, do you? If you're tired we can reschedule, I just... I wanted to make sure that you were alright, and..." Her lips pressed into a line as she tried to figure out when exactly she had become so awkward. "I'd like to know more about you, knights, if it's information you're willing to share sometime."
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Posted: Thu Apr 07, 2016 3:59 pm
Celsus gave a nod, eating another bite of his Twizzler. "It's...I suppose, to put it simply, a deeper connection with one's homeworld or wonder. The marks are the evidence of that, proof of my dedication. Or something," he added, with a slightly rueful twist of his lips.
He exhaled a breath and ever so slightly knocked a shoulder into Corvus'.
"I don't mind. I'm tired, but I'm not, well, dead," said Celsus, flashing her a small smile. "I don't mind sharing information."
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Posted: Wed Apr 13, 2016 9:14 pm
It was a very good thing that Corvus was not a comedian during her 'day job' as her sense of humor was often dry, peppered with a bit of wit and a sharp tongue. Tonight it was no better, even though she was trying her very best and smiling a real, honest to goodness smile. "Well, obviously you aren't dead if you're willing to share information," she paused for a bit of a dramatic flare as she tipped her head towards him with a grin before giving him her very best Pirates of the Caribbean impersonation. "Dead men tell no tales."
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2016 1:15 pm
Celsus just turned his head and gave Corvus a long, flat look, the Twizzler still held between his teeth.
"I think you've had enough candy for tonight," he said delicately.
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2016 5:36 pm
"Total killjoy. You're definitely a Will Turner-type," she teased, light smirk on her lips and eyes dancing with a trace of good-natured mischief. "Does that mean you're not a fan of pirate movies, Celsus? Or are you just trying to commander the rest of the bag of Twizzlers for yourself?" She left the bag alone, however, leaning back on her hands for a moment. "It's been some time since I've had a movie night... How many Pirates movies are they up to now? Enough for a decent marathon, at least-- We were talking about something else, though. Wonder. Is that what Knights are connected to?"
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2016 10:34 pm
"Am not," said Celsus, in some indignation. "And no, I'm rather a fan of pirate movies, I just think the sugar's gone to your head."
He felt relaxed for the first time in ages, casual, friendly banter easing some of the weight in his chest. He took a small breath and reached for another Twizzler, if only so that he could have something to do with his hand, Celsus biting off the end.
"Yes," he said, chewing slowly. "Like a senshi's homeworld. Sort of."
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