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 Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 5:56 pm
The contact made Lawr visibly flinch in surprise, always very sensitive to touch and easily taken by surprise at the best of times. He clenched his teeth and exhaled in a hiss, clenching his hand.
"Horace." he hissed before stammering as he tried to haul his thoughts into line. "I.." he trailed off. "I think you should keep your words to yourself for your own benefit."
He made his way hurriedly out of the tent muttering something barely audible in Swedish. "Mercifully there is not much to see with the more limited facilities, and presumably you know how runic bandages work fairly well."
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Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 6:09 pm
"I thought you had liked it when I was loud." He said, following Lawr almost placidly. It was... well, it was something to be in this situation. Words always got him in trouble, but it was physically impossible for him to be silent sometimes, in many different ways.
"Mercifully? You... you don't wish to show me around? I thought I could ask you to show me many things. I know you're a good teacher." Horace stuck close to Lawr, not touching but uncomfortably close. "I thought you could teach me your language, too - what better way to learn than at the feet of a master?" On a whim, he leaned into Lawr and breathed out some of the remaining Swedish words he knew.
"Gör mig smutsig."
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Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 6:21 pm
Horace knew what he was doing, there was no way that he did not, and the resulting effect on his libido was pushing his frustration levels into dangerous thresholds. Lawrence did not deal well with frustration at all and it took Horace moving into his personal space and whispering coaxing words into his ear to finally push him over the edge of what he was capable of tolerating.
It did not actually matter that they had just left the main infirmary tent, the short blonde man twisted and summoned both claws, splaying them wide as he stopped just short of seizing Horace's throat, left tensed and fixed like a statue as he caught up with himself.
"You." He took a slow breath. "are playing a dangerous game." he said, clenching both talons as much as it was possible to do so, letting the chain drag on the ground as he lowered his hand, stiff and fixed. "I certainly could teach you many things, but you don't want me to teach you anything any longer, you made that more than clear innumerable times over twitter. So why this?"
"Why?"
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Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 6:42 pm
Horace flinched; there was no way not to. But he controlled the second flinch, the instinctive backing away, and did not move, except to tilt his chin upwards a bit, exposing his neck even more. He held his breath. Even as Lawr dropped his hands, he held his breath.
"I don't know. I want-" He exhaled. Horace did know. It was desperation. It was a kind of fatalistic need to see Lawr just as affected as he had been, to know that he was the one affecting Lawr. His eyes fixed on that pale throat, looking for any telltale flutter of a heartbeat. He reached out and laid his hand on Lawr's chest, trying to see if he could feel that icy heart beat. If it beat faster.
"Jag trodde...." He didn't know the next word. "I thought you could still teach me in this." Some irrational part of him said that if he understood a language, he'd understand the man. Horace wasn't quite sure how things had taken this turn.
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Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 6:52 pm
The tension did not go out of Lawr's posture as he kept a surprisingly iron grip on his self control and his desire to seize the other man, knowing that if he caused any more problems for now that it would severely limit his day to day comforts. Still, he was annoyed, as annoyed as he got at the callous overstepping his carefully constructed walls of control and flipping switches in the human machine he inhabited.
His pulse was sublty visible in his throat, and when Horace placed his hand to his chest it was matched beat for beat by his heart, stepped up slightly from his usual sedate standards, adrenaline having its effects with no regard for what emotion or control had to say about it.
The contact was unbearable and he raised his still taloned hand - the missing one strangely enough - and seized Horace by the wrist.
"I do not understand what you want." he said, digging in the blades, though certainly nowhere near enough to do anything to Horace's shield. "One moment you want to be close to me and to supposedly learn from me and the next you are running off in fear and telling me you cannot allow yourself to indulge, that you will never be happy."
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Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 9:05 pm
"I.. don't know. I don't know what I expected or what I wanted." The blades felt coll against his wrist and he did not move, frozen. He frown suddenly, all the baiting light leaving his face. Horace just looked tired. They dug into his skin and he remember (how could he ever forget) how they'd felt around his throat, plunging into his shoulder. He wanted to rub his hand over his face, but instead he just stared at those gleaming blue talons. "I wanted... I wanted to know if I ever affected you the same way you did to me. If I was a blip on that radar. I can't be with you, even you told me that, but I guess I still wanted something." He ground his teeth together. Horace had felt like nothing, like... a convenience to Lawr only. "Jag ville förstå dig." Horace twisted his hand experimentally and felt the blades dig a little deeper. It wasn't a bad pain. "You're not supposed to still want to ******** me, you know."
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Posted: Wed Dec 23, 2015 2:44 am
Butch had descended into a flurry of eager barks as Lawrence took hold of Horace's wrist and these continued as he listened to what the man had to say. "It depends on how you define affect." he said, his grip tightening and then relaxing again. "And why that particular factor is so important to you. I should not have been about the feedback I could give you, the self esteem boost you get from how I react to you."
He gave the other man a very nonplussed look. "But now I suppose you have some sort of evidence of a reaction." And it irritated him and made him further restless that it was the sort of reaction which potentially could provoke him into doing the kind of rash things which left him dealing with severe and tedious repercussions.
"And who says I am not supposed to want that? Is there a guidebook?" and he narrowed his light blue eyes icily. "Perhaps you should read it to my body, it certainly does not always listen to me."
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Posted: Wed Dec 23, 2015 5:23 am
Horace curled his fingers into Lawr's chest as if debating clawing into that pale skin to see his heart for himself. "Your body doesn't lie, at least." That wasn't true. Bodily reactions often had nothing to do with feelings or lingering sentiment. But Horace feeling feeling irrational, even surrounded by white tents, even when someone could walk by. "Do you know how much you affected me?" It galled him to even talk about it. Horace refused to go into specifics. "And yet to you... I..." He shook his head. Except in these moments. He couldn't help the direction his eyes traveled when Lawr mentioned his body. As always, he refused to be entirely crude in public. Horace snapped his eye back up to Lawr's face and licked his lips, at a loss of what to say.
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Posted: Wed Dec 23, 2015 9:42 am
"I don't profess to know what it is my body does." he said, still irritable, his words clipped and tone brisk. He resented everything which was outwith his control. It was why he maintained a low level of hunger at almost all times, feeling that the pangs were the only way to keep tabs on part of his body which seemed entirely independent and automatic. His libido had long been the root of more irrational behaviours, actions which had left him feeling hollowed out and illogical in the wake of them, not emotion but something other.
He did not like Horace interfering with it at all, even as his breathing and heart rate picked up feeling his mind turn to violence.
It was with startling strength for the wiry body that he tore Horace's hand from his chest and stepped backwards, suddenly all coiled energy like a cat which had heard the erratic flutter of wings.
"I think you should be shown around by someone else." he said. "Perhaps you can speak to me when you can decide if you want to be treated with respect or if you would indeed be much happier against a wall being shown no respect at all. For now, if I have to deal with your incessant teasing any longer I think that I will very possibly try to kill you."
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Posted: Wed Dec 23, 2015 11:45 am
Horace's breath caught as Lawr moved. There was something sad about the way the other man moved away, removed himself from the situation. He curled his own hands into fists, certain if he looked at his fingers, he'd see subtle tremors wracking his body. Can't I have both? It was on the tip of his tongue to ask, but he stopped the words. "Isn't murder a harsh reaction, Lawrence?" Horace chewed his bottom lip, studying Lawr for a moment. "Well," he said, shakily," -see you around. Hejdå, min läkare." Then he tried to move past Lawr, swallowing nervously.
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