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 Posted: Sun Oct 11, 2015 8:14 pm
Well, that was a more reasonable argument. Corsant might not like it, but he could admit there was a validity to her statement; he WAS a lot bigger than her, he COULD potentially hurt her. Could. Potentially. "You're right, they probably couldn't kill you with a single bite. But a Unicorn could kill you with a well-placed stab of those pretty shiny horns, and a Wind could break your bones with a well placed sweep of those elegant wings. I suppose you're probably safe from a Flutter, but the point still stands. I would lay my physical control against any Unicorn's temper, any day of the week. Believe me, I don't want you dead, either. And if you think I could go on living if I did something to you, you have another thing coming." Still, hearing something he finally considered a 'rational argument' helped, and he was no longer the contained ball of outrage he'd been a few moments before. Instead, he was now a tired stallion, one who was wondering if he'd ever be able to change her mind. Once again, he raked his wings through his mane, briefly exposing the dark scar at his scalp as the hair was pulled back from his forehead. Once again, he tried the deep breath; in, and out. He really needed to figure out how to get past this communication error, or they'd never get anywhere. Though really needed to clear up one point of confusion, before it drove him completely mad. In a rather tightly controlled voice, MUCH less romantic than anything he'd used earlier, he said, "Yes. Our children. Yours and mine, with you being the mother and I the father. The children we would have at some point after becoming lifemates, which I would be in favor of being because of that thing I said before about loving you, which I still do, which is partly why I'm so sure I wouldn't kill you!" If that didn't clear things up, he REALLY didn't know what would...
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Posted: Mon Oct 12, 2015 2:24 pm
"Oh."
The mare who generally had an answer for everything didn't appear to have a response to that. Admittedly, it hadn't been in a romantic tone, but the first time hadn't really sunk in for her. She had assumed he had simply meant as his friend, as it had always been. They would have hung out, she would have teased him about his admirers and things would go on as normal. Instead, Corsant seemed to have developed a very different set of feelings that...well...weren't entirely out of alignment with her own.
Feelings that she had always dismissed because they were inappropriate and unrealistic; even more so when he had lost his temper and petrified her. So why did he pick now to have a sudden change in views? He'd never given any hint, any remote indication that he felt anything before and it all seemed very out of place.
She gave him a hard stare.
"Why now?" she said at last and pursed her lips. "You never looked at me before."
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Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 6:09 pm
With the way this conversation had gone so for, Corsant had braced himself for an onslaught of The Worst. Sure, he had meant to make things clear with his last statement, but clarity could be a double edged sword. If Mariasha was still afraid of him, then laying everything out there for her to see only exposed him to the potential for even greater pain. But he'd already felt so much pain, what was one more stab? He knew he'd never forgive himself if he didn't at least try...and he was done dancing around the subject. That said, Mariasha's reaction was far better than he feared. He would have preferred something a little more enthusiastic, but her question was legitimate, and she wasn't fleeing in terror. That fact alone was enough to spur a shadow of a smile to his face. Really, her question was BEYOND legitimate! Hadn't he been just as stunned when he figured it out? And he'd had a lot of time to process...which meant he'd had a lot of time to sort things out. "It's not like that, Mari...not exactly. I mean, yes, maybe me figuring it out and saying something about it is new, but the rest of it, that's something we've had for years, you know? You've always been there for me, you've had my back, pushed me to think about things and do things to be better...but that the same time, you liked me for me, you know? I mean, you always knew I was a muscle head, and you still kept coming around. Seeing you was always a highlight of my day, and I looked forward to you coming around and us doing...whatever. I guess I was so comfortable with how things were that I never really considered it being...more, you know?" He knew he wasn't sounding as articulate and clear as Mari might prefer, but at least he knew he didn't sound rehearsed! "I meant it when I said losing you tore me up, Mari. So I tried to help move myself past it, past that gut-wrenching misery, by pointing out to myself how you were 'just a friend', just some Soquili who could be replaced. But I couldn't convince myself of that, because I realized it just wasn't true." It was a lot of words for Corsant, especially all at once, but she had asked, so... If he couldn't convince her, it was all over. "You're so much more than my friend, Mari, although you're that too, of course. You're so smart and savvy, and pretty in a small and sassy way. You're just...amazing. An amazing Soquili, and am amazing mare. I wish I'd realized this a lot sooner, but I think I must have always known. I may not have 'looked at you', perse, but I never looked at anyone else, either."
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Posted: Thu Oct 22, 2015 3:29 am
Her expression twisted in to one akin to pain and she looked away. His words were a lot to take in, and a lot of them were something she found rather jarring. He hadn't intended for anything to hurt her, if she were a betting mare she would have assumed he was actually aiming for the opposite effect. Alas, when it came to Mariasha it seemed that he was putting tiny pinpricks in to her skin, and each one of them hurt.
Now he had seen her.
Now he had realised how he felt.
Now he had realised that he couldn't lose her.
She shuffled her hooves and stared down at them in an uncharacteristically awkward manner.
He may not have realised how he felt, but she had known how she felt years ago, and all those years ago she had also accepted that she simply wasn't meant for him. She'd known her place (despite what her grandmother might say), and she'd known from the start that she was too plain and mild mannered to be worth any of his time. She was his friend, had always been his friend, and that was what she had accepted would be the norm, in fact, she'd half expected to meet his beau at some point... After all, you couldn't have everything you wanted.
Perhaps that was why she was having such a hard time processing the information he had given her. She had long since accepted what she wanted was non-existent and mentally prepared herself what she had expected to happen. Disbelief, was that it? Or maybe it was denial...
"I knew you were going to eventually," she said finally, her tone measured. "Look at others, that is," she amended and shook her head. "Are you sure you aren't just mistaking all of this for grief, sometimes friends can inspire similar loyalty to people you're in love with, it's a similar set of emotions after all," she continued quietly.
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Posted: Wed Nov 18, 2015 2:32 pm
Eloquence had never been Corsant's strong suit; he'd been better at expressing himself with actions than words. So far, he'd managed to say what he needed to say without screwing up too badly, but it was a fact that the longer he went on talking, the higher the probability he'd ruin everything. This fact was bouncing around at the back of his mind throughout his entire speech, and Mari's reaction only confirmed what he'd already feared; he'd said something wrong. Why else would Mari have remarked on that one thing, that she expected him to 'see' someone else, when he'd only meant it to be a truthful compliment? Corsant was starting to fear that no matter which way he turned, he was going to lose Mari. Maybe he already had, and trying to continue this conversation was nothing but further mental and emotional torture, meant to drive him back into a darkness from which he'd never return... Well, he didn't care. If he was doomed to lose her, then he was going to go down fighting. Taking another deep breath and reminding himself he deserved this, he said in a tone not half as measured as Mariasha's, "How long has it been, Mari? I have been thinking about this every day, first trying to figure out why it hurt so much when you were 'just a friend', even my best friend, then, when I realized why I actually missed you, trying to figure out how I could have missed...knowing it, I guess. I know I'm not fast on the uptake, sometimes, but I know this. I know this." For emphasis, his tapped not his head, but his heart, maintaining eye contact with Mariasha the whole time. He would convince her, somehow, and he kept their eyes locked as he continued. "Is it really that hard to believe it? I know I'm not the greatest catch for a great mare like you, but I challenge any stallion out there to match me on feeling. How can I prove it to you?" Whatever it was, he would do it. No matter what!
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