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"Oh thank god," she breathed out with a sigh of relief. She felt so much better hearing that. It still hurt this was happening at all but at least she could feel better knowing he wasn't going to pursue other women. They'd still talk. Be friends.

Thank god.

"Nothing I say or do will change your mind?"

Heidi nodded her head. "Yes," she replied softly. "Doesn't mean it..doesn't hurt to hear these things..."

She shuffled awkwardly in place, looking up at Tuck. Now what? Was he not her boyfriend anymore? Was she not his girlfriend? He said he still loved her. He still wanted her. He just. Had to get back into the right mindset. Okay. She could handle that.

"So..what now?" She finally asked. "Are we on a break? Are we still together just not..together? Are we breaking up?" Nothing in her tone was accusatory or upset, simply inquiring to understand just where they stood.

A break...okay. She could do a break. Heidi didn't say anything at first, she simply nodded her head and looked in thought. Wait. What did he say? She blinked, staring dumbly at him. "I will wait for you. You'll always have claim on me, seriously. You know that." She shrugged. "I'm not interested in anyone else. I love you. You don't need to worry about me getting with anyone else. Promise."

She scowled when he suggested she might break up with him. "Don't be stupid. I'm not breaking up with you. I'll..I'll let us have the break...but you have to promise me you'll come back to me when you're feeling better. Promise me."

"You do treat me right..or...you did until two weeks ago." Heidi frowned. "I'll wait for you. Just don't push me away again, you have to keep your word that we'll still be friends and stuff, and that this is just a break. It's not the end."

She sighed, combing her fingers through her hair and looking up at Tuck. "Evan said I need to 'punch you in the d**k', it's the only way you'll learn, apparently." Her logic had been he'd never hurt her with it before, but well..he'd...kind of used that logic against her with his confession. Heidi shook her head. She wasn't going to do that. No.

"Can I have like...a hug? Before you go?"

Heidi simply chuckled. She wasn't taking the advice that she should punch him. Though she might agree he deserved it, she wouldn't do it.

Instead she let him pull her into the hug she was asking for, arms slipping under his to slide up his back and grip his shoulders. She buried her face against him, clinging tightly to Tuck with an almost desperate tightness. Heidi didn't want to let him go. She wanted to cling to him, cuddle him, kiss him, she wanted him to make love to her and forget all about their earlier conversation. She wanted to be selfish.

Heidi smartly chose not to voice any of this.

But she still wouldn't be the first to let go.

He was so warm, she missed being in his arms. Heidi whimpered, holding him tighter and kissing his neck. "I love you, I love you so much," she whined, her voice rather muffled by his throat.

His lips kissing all over her face made her shiver and whimper, nails digging into his shoulders. This wasn't fair. She wanted him, but all she could think about was the stripper. Him saying she wasn't special. That she was just a hot, eager piece of a**. He didn't mean any of it but the fact remained that he still did say it.

"I love you," she whimpered, returning his kisses.

He lifted her and she gasped, eyes opening wide. Any other day she would be begging, telling him exactly what she wanted him to do to her and how. She'd improved at that, at least. She would be trying to peel their clothes off as quickly as she could. Her legs would wrap around his waist, ankles locking behind him, so there was absolutely no space between them.

But now? Now she just looked terrified. She was torn. She could give in, make love to the man she loved so dearly, but she knew he would just leave her after. Whether it was immediate, after she fell asleep, or the next morning...he would leave. That wasn't fair. Her legs wrapped around his hips only enough to keep her from falling, but it wasn't with the usual excited fervor. That wasn't to say she was unaffected by what he was doing to her by any means, she was very tempted to give in and forget everything for a few hours, but that wasn't fair..

"You won't stay," she whispered, sounding heartbroken. "If we do this you won't stay and I'll be all alone." Heidi shook her head and buried her face against his shoulder, whimpering unhappily. "You won't stay I know you won't." Nothing she said or did would change his mind on their 'break', she doubted sex would just magically fix things. She curled tightly around him. He'd just leave. He'd go back to his room and expect her to stay here in a room she had had no intention of ever returning to in the first place.

Alone.

And just as suddenly as she'd been picked up she was put down again. She felt a little cold without him and very nearly threw herself at him, but she refrained from doing so. Him doing this was proof she was right. She didn't like being right.

He walked away and she could only stare at the floor. She...she did what was best for both of them. It wasn't fair to either of them if they..yeah. But her heart went from a pleasant flutter to a painful tightness in her chest, and a lump formed in her throat that made her choke. Heidi made it to her bed and just fell onto it, hugging her pillows tightly. She was silent. No crying, no sobbing, wailing, even a sniffle or whimper. Heidi didn't make a sound.

He promised they could still talk and be friends, right? Green eyes peeked out from where her face was buried into the pillow to look at her phone. She reached for it.