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 Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:06 pm
Rep was given a long stare of appraisal.
It wasn't really an appraisal and the stare wasn't that long and about three seconds later he was thrown out the window right through the aquarium glass once again proving that buying overpriced expensive things did nothing for the salvation of mankind.
Fortunately the Moon Hunters were doing their daily rescue routine and Rep managed to land pretty unscathed via a very large trampoline very conveniently placed within Caelius throwing trajectory. It was grass coloured just in case.
If Rep made it back to Mark's place he would see the Death assistant trying very hard to assemble the last pieces of the box. It was a pretty nice box, and by nice meaning grey and rather ordinary, and each side had a different series of runes on it and seemed extremely overly complicated.
"Did you get at least another five minutes?" started Mark hopefully from within the box.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:16 pm
Rep knew it was coming even before he crashed through the glass and onto a trampoline outside. All he could think as the world zoomed past and Tracey said some very nasty things about his taxing his shield all the time, was that Marcus came up with some really ******** annoying ideas.
The trampoline, being a trampoline, meant that he also bounced off of that too when he hit it, and it was only by sheer virtue of about a hundred fear charges that he landed somehow on his feet. As he dusted himself off, he did think that some of the ideas were at least competent ones, even if the ******** windows weren't.
He did head back to Mark and gave him an exasperated look. "Well I managed to get however many minutes it took to throw me out a ******** window, are you nearly done?" He squinted at the thing he was building. "The ******** is it? Or is that classified?" Knowing Mark it could be anything from some mission-critical superweapon to something to keep his figurines in. "Don't make me go back up there." he threatened standoffishly.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:38 pm
"Well should should have talked slower," Mark countered, suddenly offering Caelius delay tips. "And you should have like, paused every third word, it totally throws him off because he'll keep on thinking you are trying to say more than you're actually saying and will just keep on waiting."
Thonk, went something inside the box.
The Death assistant popped his head out again. "Okay, well, desperate times call for desperate measures. Here's what we're going to do. I'm going to continue working on this, and you are going to carry me with the box to the office and I'll work on the way and once we get there you can do what I just said and I'll keep on working."
It was clearly foolproof, other than the fact that the box was about 6 feet either direction.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:53 pm
Rep noted the tips, because when it came to dealing with Cael, he couldn't get enough advice. Being a frustrating pain in the a** seemed like a good way to get him punted out the window again, but if it worked, it worked.
"The whole thing." Rep said grimly, looking the box over. Carrying Tracey was one thing, the weapon was made lighter by the fact he belonged to the redhead. The box didn't look easy to carry. "Uhm. I can ******** try." he said.
Making his way over to it and seeking for a decent handhold, he tried valiantly to lift it and heft it up onto his back. He just hoped to hell it was lighter than it looked.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:59 pm
The box was unreasonably heavy and quite slippery. Unlike weapon-human bonding, the box did not resonate with Rep's personal requirements, and neither did Mark.
After a long second, Mark popped his head out again. "What are you doing? Use the trolly. The trolly."
He pointed to what could only be explained as a rather large trolly with for some reason, six wheels instead of two or four. At least it would have better balance and the Death assistant would be carried around in style. It was a good thing Deus now had ramps, thanks to Lance, sometimes Mist division leaders were actually useful for the correct reasons.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:14 pm
Rep felt decidedly emasculated by his lack of ability to get a grip on the stupid box (it was a stupid box now because he hadn't been able to carry it). Just a bit abashed by Mark's tone - because his feelings were tender - he skulked off to get the trolly in question, muttering huffily to himself all the while. He had been solving things the Sun way, clearly.
Wheeling the contraption over, he tipped up at least one edge of the awkward box and with considerable effort, shoved it up onto the transport, and then without waiting to see if Mark was comfortable or stable, he dragged it behind him and out of the room.
It was ******** heavy even like this.
"You ever think about cutting back on the junk food and beer?" he said huffily, before being shoved down one of the ramps with the momentum of the box and trolly, only managing to stop it at the bottom with sheer luck.
It took a lot of effort and strange looks to get the whole thing to Cael's office.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:25 pm
Mark looked absolutely affronted. "What does that even mean? Just because I like, drink lots of beer and pizza and more beer doesn't mean you can tell me how to life my life mom." He would remain like this, head half-poking out from the box, arms sullenly crossed in an act of rebellion, entirely forgetting that the project was due in some odd minutes, and would remain like this just in time for no less than five snapshots from passing by Hunters, most who would file the image under interesting but not particularly good blackmail material.
They arrived at Caelius's office with about two minutes to spare.
Mark gave Rep one more sort of extremely rebellious look (it was unclear who was the aggressor in their relationship anymore) and slunk back into the box.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:40 pm
"If I was your ******** mom, you wouldn't be such a ******** disaster." Rep said, because he was the very picture of successful and wise life choices. It was good though that he wasn't quite bright enough to register that Mark wasn't working on the mystery box in question or he might have stopped and tried to demand it get done. Instead he was more concerned with the looks people were giving him, self conscious that people might think he was giving rickshaw trips to just ******** anyone and shot the bastards with their phone cameras murderous looks.
Wheeling the box into the room, Rep set it just inside the door.
"So." he said, ponderously, addressing Cael. "Like. I like. Well I went over there and like. Get this."
He looked at the box. "Well I get there right? And the room is just a complete mess of things man. The room is such a disaster."
He looked back. "And I said to Mark like. He should maybe like. Work faster" he raised his voice pointedly on the last comment. "and like. Well." Daringly he leaned one hand on the perfect table, trying to appear more confident than he felt. "You'll never guess what ******** amazingly important and interesting thing happened next.."
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:46 pm
The Death lead was either ignoring Rep or listening intently, and it was kind of hard to tell when he just continued writing into whatever it was he was writing without actually acknowledging Rep, the trolly, Mark inside the trolly, or Rep, Mark, the trolly, and whatever the whole debacle was with the box.
"Keep on going," hissed Mark, "I'm almost done."
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 9:59 pm
Well this was promising, Rep thought, noting that Cael hadn't yet thrown him out a window yet or told him that he was worthless. On the death leader scale, he was doing really well. So he kept going.
"Well. Let me tell you. I get in there and like. Well, I go over to the desk and there's all these beer cans. So I like. Well I move one, as you do." he made a vague gesture. "And under it there's this cockroach. A wee cockroach about this big." he made a gesture with his fingers.
"Naw. Naw, no even that big, a wee bit bigger than that." he moved his fingers apart. "And it looks at me right? Looks at me with its wee bug eyes. They have loads of eyes right? Compound eyes. But you know that. Anyway, anyway. It looks at me and I'm like hi there wee man." He mimicked a wave. "And it ******** looks at me and then it sings."
"Nae s**t man, it ******** sings. It sings and then like, the other beer bottles move!"
He made a dramatic hand gesture, as if encompassing the whole room. "And there are LOTS of wee cockroaches. And they all ******** sing in wee tiny voices. He'd got a ******** choir of cockroaches in his room!"
He glanced back at the box briefly, willing Mark to get a ******** move on. "And that wasn't even all man... this other thing happened and it was really important and had like, lots of swag artifacts involved. And you can trust me about swag artifacts, because well look at me." He gestured at his giant sapphire around his neck and his earring.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 10:11 pm
Snap, went the pen in the Death lead's hand and it was either indicative that he was so super entranced by Rep's story, probably especially the part with the singing cockroaches, that when Rep got to the part with the choir, he had broken the pen out of complete (delighted) surprise or he was really ******** tired of hearing endless bullshit.
It sort of felt like one of those spin the prize wheels where the only prizes were death and imminent death, so technically everyone was a winner, it was just a matter of how long the wheel continued to turn.
"If" Caelius began, "you ever-"
"I'm done!" interrupted Mark, suddenly popping out from the box. There was a bit of an awkward moment where he excused himself, stepping out of the box, trying to untangle an oddity of wires, ended up knocking over two runes, pushed them back together again, and then shook the whole thing just to make sure it wasn't going to topple over, "It's working!"
"You," it was a good thing the Death lead was making eye contact as he seemed to have forgotten Rep's name or repressed it in the long battle of how possibly anyone could be so painfully retarded, "put the contents into the second container."
He pointed at the contents, or gestured at the other box, the one with the hand still wedged in it, and Mark did not look like he wanted to help Rep at all. Caelius would stare at Rep and/or Mark for about two seconds longer before losing any semblance of interest, and going back to working, or writing in his diary, nobody ever knew or lived to tell the tale (and you wouldn't believe how it happened!).
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 10:22 pm
There had been a moment where Rep had felt his own imminent and probably injury looming on the horizon and he had been about to apologize profusely to Cael and try to shift all the blame to Mark when the Death assistant re-appeared on the scene. He'd never been so pleased to see the scruffy b*****d and somehow he'd managed to get the thing running - whatever it was.
When he was addressed (You was a familiar term to the redhead and not the worst thing he'd been called on a regular basis) Rep gave Cael the most attentive and compliant look he could possibly muster.
And then he looked from the awful hand box to the bigger taller stupid box, and back again. His life was a long sequence of terrible and horrible risks, he realized. But sometimes you just had to buckle the ******** down and do as you were told.
Obediently and with resignation he made his way over to the table to pick up the box on the table - with as little contact with it as he could possibly manage - and then to at arm's length try to carry it to Mark's creation.
"Do I just drop it in?" he asked the less terrifying of the two other men uncertainly. If the answer was yes, he did, glad to be rid of it.
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Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 10:26 pm
"You gotta like, open it first," said Mark, in the corner furthest possible from Rep, "just unlatch the top two hatches, and you should be good. Press down hard or the box won't open. Then just like, carry the stuff and put it into the second box."
Mark had also failed to mention once the (old) box was open, the contents were one-hundred and five percent different segmented parts of a probably once whole body.
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Posted: Mon Sep 22, 2014 2:40 pm
Rep did as he was instructed, placing the box from Cael's desk down on the floor before opening the second large box carefully. All of this was done as if either could blow up or murder him without warning at any given moment.
He eyed the grisly body parts with concern, but didn't question it, putting the contents into whatever Mark had made.
And then he very hurriedly stepped back, just in case.
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Posted: Mon Oct 06, 2014 4:02 pm
The hand had managed to slip out of the new container, and it was slowly, crawling on all five fingers, away from the office towards the door. Before anything else could escape, Mark quickly snapped the lid on, making sure the box was very boxed in. The inside contents were still thumping around dully, but the Death assistant adamantly remained leaning on the top of the box.
"See?" he squeaked, kicking the boxed box, "these containers can be mass produced no problem. Works like a charm."
Green ichor began to leak out from the bottom of the box.
"Err," continued Mark, "just some minor technical problems, no problem at all. Everything is-"
- The box finally with the last vestiges of effort, collapsed, spraying Mark and Rep with a horrific green liquid. At the very same time, all contents inside, all severed contents from remaining arm, to legs, to head, torso, and singular eyeball, began to grow worm like tendrils, mobile appendages, and slowly and surely scamper, rather nimbly, out of the hallway.
By the time Caelius had turned around Mark was gone.
The Death lead looked at Rep as if this was all the Sun Hunter's fault.
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