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 Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2014 8:54 pm
The only response to her request was a shift in position and Orah watched curiously as the tall man walked around behind her, her plate still poised in one hand and fork in the other. Suddenly his hands wrapped around her slender waist and she stiffened a little as she tucked her elbows against her ribs, rich color flooding her face to turn her olive-toned skin a dark rose. Part of it was the gentle rebuke he delivered in his far-too-sensible voice and part of it was the heat of his palms through the thin material of her working clothes. They spanned far more inches than any other person and they made her feel truly tiny.
But then his arms came around her and the edges of her shoulder blades felt his chest against them, heavy chin on the prominent bones of her shoulder. The act drew a deep shudder from Orah and her plate lowered slowly to her lap as she let out her breath in a long, shaky exhale, eyes closing for a long, steadying moment. His words were an echo of another's and it made her ache...
You do not need to suffer for your inability to personally cure all the ills of the world. Please have a care. And learn to love yourself a little bit, for all the rest of us that love you.
"You and Laney..." She said after a moment, her voice a tad thick around its note of self-deprecating humor. "Can't get away with anything between the two of you, can I?"
Why does it hurt so much? Its what I want, but hearing it from them makes my heart squeeze. It would be easier if they didn't care, it wouldn't keep reminding me how unworthy of it I am.
Reaching, Orah rolled the last pancake up in a loose cylinder with her fingers and ate it in a few bites, licking the last of the syrup off her skin. Task finished and evidence of her embarrassing attempt at putting his well-being before her own erased, the young woman patted Herger's cheek with a gentle hand.
"If you two got some fuller medical training, you'd put me out of a job." She said as she let herself lean back against him, secretly enjoying the arms wrapped around her even with its pang of guilt. "I'm not going anywhere while there is still work to be done and precious few to do it. Can't just skip out and dump it on someone else."
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Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2014 8:52 pm
"Lady Hvergelmir is very wise. If I've matched her, I have no complaint. You shouldn't want to, the 'getting away with' things that are hurting yourself. There's enough people trying to hurt all of us. " "I think I read that somewhere - 'Be nice to yourself. It's hard to be happy when someone is mean to you all the time'" "I thought it was clever since someone usually means someone else. But its yourself you have to be with every hour of the day, " She probably doesn't need the explanation. Lady Ida is smart- she's a real nurse. But maybe the talking will calm her. Just cadence and the vibration through chest to her back. He didn't shift, didn't remove his arms from wrapped, letting her settle comfortably. Maybe with the warmth and companionship after a stout meal she would get sleepy. Safety and closeness were two things lacking in so many of their lives. Bluefire Dragonz This one is probably ready to work towards closing? Did you want to do the falling asleep in your post and he can carry her/close in mine?
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Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2014 10:16 pm
"I'm not trying to hurt myself." Orah mumbled, a note of exasperation in her voice as her eyebrows pulled together, drawing a line between them. "I don't know why everyone seems to think that... I'm trying to help everyone else."
Why did they seem to think she set out to purposefully punish herself? She was only ever doing what she could to support the faction, to heal the injured and keep everyone strong. Why did no one see that? All they saw was the weight she lost, but everyone was losing weight. She had circles under her eyes, but there were many faces with those bruises. So, maybe she pushed herself harder than she should, but so what? She could hold back, save her strength, but if she died tomorrow what good would it have done to hold back anything? She had no delusions that she was going to last long in this war and she was honestly surprised she had survived as long as she had. If the end came as she was expecting, then what was the saying... I'll sleep when I'm dead? She could rest when it was time for her to.
Orah wrapped her arms over her chest as she brooded, above where Herger's circled her waist, and let her forearms settle on top of his. He seemed to have no desire to release her and she had no desire to ask him to, deciding that for once she was going to be a little selfish and accept comfort as it was offered. It felt good and there was little enough of it in her life. Too little, and she suspected that might be one of the causes for this pervading melancholy lately, why the concern of her friends seemed to irritate her more than it should. She grew up being hugged and cuddled, holding hands and kissing cheeks. Being alone so much was... lonely.
Herger was solid as a rock behind her, a warm, flesh-and-blood rock. A thought teased at the back of her mind, a wonder at how he managed to be so still. Everyone shifted their weight, made small motions... he had a surprising amount of control, or maybe a simple lack of intrusive thoughts, to not fidget.
"It is a clever thought." She finally conceded after a few long moments, her annoyance fading slowly under the onslaught of surrounding warmth and filled stomach. She was so tired... if she sat here much longer, she was going to fall asleep. Orah could already feel it tugging at her, easing the slope of her shoulders and making her eyelids heavy. She should get up and make the trek to her bed, but she was reluctant to put out the effort to stand up and leave the warm space she was in. Her bed would be cold too, having sat empty all night.
Orah suppressed a yawn with a force of will, muscles in her jaw jumping as she clenched them shut. She struggled for a topic, something to talk about, but the threads slipped through mental fingers like water and she found herself staring at the fire, watching the flames dance. Her eyes closed and she let them be for a few moments, each time she opened them shorter and the time she let them rest longer... and her battle with sleep was short lived. He'd feel it, when it claimed her... control slipped and her body lost its tension, relaxing like a child with complete trust. Her breath slowed, deepened. She be embarrassed later, when she woke, realizing how much she'd let slip in front of him. For falling asleep sitting up like a child kept up past their bed time.
For now though, she was dead to the world, lost to sleep that promised no nightmares with her last trip to her planet still so fresh.
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Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 12:54 pm
Her sulk and displeasure, argument of the point, by way of deflection of applicability, was his own fault really. Should, must, and have to we're all phrases that one did not use with princesses. Imperatives where their to give, not to receive. Things that sovereigns needed were always better posed as questions and options for their perusal. He had patience, though. Weathering the silence between and the closed-posture of her arms, was as much a game of endurance as it was of faith in the power of a hug, of just holding someone in a rough time, to ease the heart. Her relenting words were the sign- his faith was not misplaced. She stayed, yawning and drifting, so Herger stayed as well. Rather than reactivate the need to think by talking or asking questions, he hummed to her. Snatches of archaic, rimur-like tunes is deep notes that didn't suffer for lack of accompaniment or actual vocalization. Still he patiently waited. And princess Ida slept. And Herger, knight of Næryofjord slowly moved and gathered her onto his arms properly to carry her to rest. Shifting her a little, he stooped and picked up one of the flat stones ledged around the fire- the guard used them as water bottles to bed like the early 1920s miners did in the vestas and patch towns. Maybe she would be angry that there was a (relatively) clean rock under the little mattress of her feet. Maybe. It was neither burden nor trouble- but an honor and care.
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