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 Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 9:40 am
You're almost human. Almost. Maebe whirled up, knocking the chair off onto the floor as she viciously turned on him. She walked up to him until her face touched his, but it was clear she was not in the mood for a kiss - or anything she normally came to him for. "I think you just wore out your welcome. Maybe you should come back and visit me when I'm more human. Right now, all you're going to find is a monster. And you've made it clear you'd rather not tussle with a monster anymore."
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 9:45 am
Oops. s**t. He really had crossed a line. Otto flinched, guilt setting in very quickly. There was a reason he wished he didn't speak his mind. He hurt people. Maebe is human. And she too could be hurt. He really was pond scum. "I'm sorry." He muttered with his head hung low, backing away and out the door. He'd ******** up big time. And it wasn't even the sex he was worried about losing. What he was losing, was respect for himself. He was no better than the shameful boys and girls that had teased her in school.
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 9:51 am
"No you're not." Maebe hissed out, even as he walked out the door. "This is the trouble with you humans. You love to tell yourselves that you only meant the best, you never meant to hurt, but apologies are just get out of jail free cards. If you were the kind of man who truly would be sorry to say something like that, you wouldn't have said it." She was out of her element, and every inch of her felt like she was on fire. She couldn't control the flames that flickered for the first time in years. She couldn't breathe and return to her beloved apathy. She could hardly breathe at all. She watched him go, and hoped the absence of his presence would give her the peace she so desperately needed. She needed him to leave. She needed to be alone so bad - " Otto." Which did not explain why she'd just reached out with a twitch of her hand, as if to stop him. It did not explain why she'd just said his name, which would inevitably stall his exit. It did not explain anything. "Don't."
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 9:56 am
God help him, Otto stopped from leaving. Again. He huffed shakily, turning his head to regard her. His eyes were starting to turn a little red. " What?" He barked, hurt. "Whatddyou want?" She was hurt. He was hurt. He'd hurt others time and time again, because he himself would become lost in pain, blinded to the hearts of others until it was too late. That's how he'd lost his first girlfriend. "You can go ahead and tell yourself I meant to hurt you all you ********' want. But humans make mistakes all the damned time. Heaven help me for tryin' to admit when I'm wrong." He stopped himself then, biting his lower lip and turning his head down. Why was she making him hurt so much. Why did he care? Why couldn't he just shut off, and stop hurting people?
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 10:07 am
"You're right." It actually made her feel better to admit that. The fire that roared against her skin abated, just for a minute. Just enough to feel like it was safe to come closer, and stand in front of him. Just enough to be able to look him in the eyes. "Humans make mistakes. You're right. But that's why I came for you. Because you needed to learn to stop making mistakes. They're very bad for your health." Her hands rose up, and fell into place against the back of his neck. Her arms rested against him, and eventually, so did the rest of her. She didn't pull him into a kiss, but her eyes remained fixed on his, as if trying to tell him something very important. Which she was. "It would be a mistake for you to stay, with me, right now." She whispered it, because it was the truth, and simultaneously the hardest thing she'd ever had to say.
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 10:28 am
What did she want then? She once again seemed to be acting like what she did was for his benefit, but again he was left with a tug and push of emotions. Reeling him in, pushing him out. What did she want? What did he want? Her body was close and alluring, but her words were in the guise of warnings and advice. He was confusing his heart and his lust. The two were both so strong,, he just couldn't tell. She seemed lonely. She seemed hurt. But did he want to stay her for? Or for him? He was so caught up in trying not be selfish, to be good and just, but dark and needy feelings pressured him to do what the moment urged of him. Had she honestly approached him to help? Was she truly so selfless? Was he terrible for thinking she was selfish herself? His mouth twisted, a grimace of pai and confusion. "One minute you're tellin' me you only wanna help, and now you're hangin;' offa me like Mistress of the Night again?" He grabbed her hands, pushing them away. "You tell me to leave, then you call me back like you're sorry? I ain't your ********' yoyo!" He barked out in a tremble. "Don't... call yourself a mistake. It's like you're tryin' to guilt me into somethin', then guilt me out of it. I don't know what to ********' do anymore!"
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 10:38 am
He'd made the right decision, by pushing her away. He was listening to her advice, instead of the emotions that were trying to lead them down dangerous paths. He was learning. Good for him. The moment he pushed her hands away, she was back in her room, and away from him. If she'd been stronger, she would have looked him in the eye when she spoke. But she knew there was a visible tension in her eyes, begging him to do the wrong thing. So she continued to back away, looking around for anything - anything but him to focus on. "You're not the only confused one, Otto." She barked out in a breath of laughter. "I should have let you leave when I told you to go. I'm still trying to tell you that you should. It just isn't what I want, and if you haven't noticed by now, when I want something, I'm not very considerate about getting it." The fire was back, consuming her until she would be nothing but ashes. She lifted her hands in the air and twirled in the embers. "Go, go, just like you should. There's nothing for you to feel guilty about, here."
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 10:54 am
Dammit. He wanted to make her feel better. Feel loved. But that was only because that's how he wanted to be treated. Right? She didn't want it. And if she did, she was approaching her wants the same way he did; by denying them. She threw herself at him for sex, but to her, that was just a weapon. Matters of the heart were likely alien to her, or simply unwelcome. Leave, just leave. She gave you an out, so go.
Go!He wasn't being fair to her. That much was obvious. He was being needy, just as always. Too possessive, too attached. "Okay, fine. I'll leave you alone, if that's what you want. I don't wanna leave you alone though." He'd be honest, only a little. Even if he was only getting hurt by being with her. Even if every time he gave himself away, little pieces died inside. "Maybe it's just the sex, maybe I just feel bad for you. It's all selfish of me. I'm selfish." ********, why was he doing this? Was he honestly trying to save her? Be her friend? He was doing it to make himself feel better, but ultimately it would only do the opposite. "So if you want somethin'? Just come out and ask for it. It'll either be a yes or a no." "If you want me to, I'll keep my heart out of it."
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 11:04 am
A tiny little part of her, a part in pigtails and loafers, was happy he hadn't left. She stopped spinning, and settled her hands on the back of her chair. Her eyes were on him again through the mirror, but this time she looked so much more like herself. That smug little smile, the careful eyes hiding something he couldn't quite read underneath. Her head tilted, and all that perfect hair came tumbling down to one shoulder. "You're not listening." She told him. "I just told you. The problem is I don't want you to leave. I don't want - " Careful, child. ".. you to stop being selfish. I should. I really should." Her smile quirked into something more awkward than smug. "I'm being very naughty." She checked her nails again, to make sure the moment of passion hadn't ruined her manicure. No, still flawless. "If you stay, you're making a mistake. But not for me. For you. Because I think," Her lips turned down for a moment. "I think I can handle whatever you're doing to me. But I'm strong, Otto. Hard. Prepared. Whatever's going on, whatever the outcome is, I can survive." Her eyes lifted back up to his. Her expression told him that everything hinged on this moment. "Can you?"
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 11:08 am
Otto truly believed he wasn't fragile. He believed he was strong, and resiliant. After all, he was a survivor, right? Every losing battle wore him down, but he never seemed to fall. Was that strength? Or was he too stupid to die. Otto lifted his head a little higher, and kicked the door closed with his foot, leaving them both in her room. "Maybe." He was so good at making mistakes.
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