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Briinah had tried asking grandfather Nitoh's permission to answer the call to battle. He had responded with disgust in his voice. "Absolutely not!" he shouted. His words had stung her. She had barely even brought up the subject before he threw it back at her. She didn't think he even considered it. What was worse was her mother's reaction. She had been around the corner and over heard them talking. As if Nitoh's reaction hadn't scolded her enough, Ah'brii jumped in with tears in her eyes. "How could you?!" her voice sounded betrayed. "Why would you even consider? Don't you know I would die of worry?" she asked with pain in her voice. "You didn't even think of me. What would I do if I lost my precious Briinah too?" she broke down into tears. She was sobbing uncontrollably and Nitoh had gone over to tend to her.

Even though she had said those things like a question, Briinah knew she wouldn't be allowed to answer them. Nitoh looked at her accusingly before he helped Ah'brii to her bedroom. Briinah was left in the kitchen area. Her fists were clenched, she had bitten her lip and was looking down at the worn wood floorboards, tears flowing down her cheeks.
"I hate them!" she thought to herself. "They never let me leave!" Her mother was so difficult to reason with and Nitoh was the law of the house.

Nitoh had kept careful track of them ever since they moved in with him. Ah'brii's night terrors worsened, and his grip around her tightened. In moments like this when mother was a mess he always blamed Briinah. He didn't out right say it was her fault for her behavior, but his eyes blamed her. She didn't get it! She didn't do anything! She never did. She always did what she was told. She couldn't understand why Nitoh was punishing her.

Briinah sniffled and quickly whipped her eyes. She spun on her heals and stormed through the shutter doors. She ran around the side of the home to the storage barrels. She opened one and pulled out a satchel, a quiver and her training bow. She had made the crude bow herself and had never actually been able to kill anything with it. She kept it hidden from her mother and grandfather. They discouraged any ambitions to become a hunter.

Her father was a hunter. She admired his strength and patience. She wanted to be just like him when she grew up. He was so proud, he promised he would buy her first bow. A part of Briinah still hoped he would show up one day. It had already been over a decade that he disappeared. She took in a deep breath and held the crude bow to her chest. She turned to the forest and let out a controlled breath. She looked determined and equipped the quiver. She had pulled out a cloak from the back and threw that over her shoulders too. She began her walk into the forest. She knew where she was going and moved fairly quickly without hesitation.

She had thought it was strange how quickly her mother assumed Evgir was dead. Hunters had gone missing before but could usually be tracked down. She remembered they had found one of his old camp sites but couldn't find any more clues.
Briinah angrily pushed a branch out of her path.
"Why did they stop looking?!?" she exclaimed aloud.
She thought if only they had kept looking, just a little bit longer they would have found him. She didn't believe he would leave her without giving her a message, a sign, something, anything! She huffed, and realized she was crying again. She continued to stomp through the forest. Why did you leave me?
He had left her with her already fragile mother, they had no where else to go except to live with grandpa. That horrible controlling grandpa who forbade her from going into the forest, or becoming a hunter, or doing anything without him or a suitable escort! She didn't want to be some frail thing that needed to be carried around. She didn't wan't to be her mother.

Briinah stopped walking. The air around her was quiet and the sky was growing dark. "Wow, had I already been out walking that long?" She looked about her. If she had been out that long already then she should be close by now. She squinted and looked a little farther ahead. She could see it! An old run down caravan. Her old home.

She ran to it, as if her father was waiting for her, she ran. It was partially covered in vines and shrubs and nearly covered the steps up to the door. She pulled and ripped at the overgrowth and made a path. She stopped and placed her hand on the door.

Strange, she remembered it being much larger. The paint was faded but she could still see the detailed patterns her mother had painted long ago. She let her finger trace one of the details, with it her finger lifted a layer of blue grey dust. She pressed on the door until it swung open. She gasped and pulled her hands to her face.

Everything was a dull grey color, covered in that blue grey dust. part of the roof had collapsed and was laying over the kitchen area. The hole let in what was left of the day light, it illuminated the room with a dim glow.

She wasn't sure what she was expecting. She knew no one had touched it since they left but it was still surprising to see it in such condition. "Not even a ghost would live here" she thought. She made her way to her room, the floor had fallen out and a tree was now growing where her bed had been. She turned to her parents room, the door was still intact. She placed her hand on the handle and remembered how she would open it very quietly so she could sneak into her parents bed in the middle of the night.

She held her breath as she slowly turned the knob and silently pushed the door open. The room was still mostly intact. There wasn't as much dust in and the bed and an old dresser still remained in their original places. She walked over the the dresser and pulled one of the drawers. A blanket and two of her fathers old shirts still sat mostly intact. One of the shirts was full of moth holes and the blanket had minimal damage. But the last shirt, looked as if it had just been folded that morning.

She placed both her hands on it and gently lifted it out of the drawer. The orange one, she remembered him wearing this. She brought it over and sat on the bed. Without making a sound she began to cry again. She let her tears fall onto the shirt as she ran her thumb over the pink shell buttons. She didn't know what to think or feel anymore. She just missed him and wished he hadn't left her.

She fell back onto the bed and curled up with the shirt close to her face. Briinah cried until she fell asleep.


She didn't wake up until the morning sun shined in her eyes. She sat up, startled, and looked around before she remembered where she was. She immediately felt guilty. She knew her mother was probably worried sick and Nitoh was probably throwing a fit and gathering a search party. Even if they had made her mad yesterday she hadn't intended to worry them. She immediately got up and left the home. She kept the shirt and stuffed it into her satchel. She tried to think of how she was going to explain this to grandpa. Oh sorry, I just ran away to sleep in a old dusty house! They would be fussing over her for weeks. She cursed at herself as she ran through the woods back to grandpa's place. She hoped they would be more worried than angry with her.

She decided it would have been easier to give up her shoddy bow than her father's newly discovered shirt. That night she had ran away to her old home and foolishly fallen asleep there. Grandpa had seen her before she could put her bow away. She had explained to the boiling Nitoh that she had been practicing her hunting and had lost her arrows and was up looking for them. He was so angry she could have told him anything and it wouldn't have made a difference. He couldn't even say anything he just pointed at the house and said, "Go see your mother!"

Ah'brii was crumpled up at the family table. She was sobbing and was surrounded by napkins as pale and crumpled as she was.
"Mother I'm sorry I ran off. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."
Her head shot up, she looked angry, relived, and betrayed. Her face was stained with tears and her eyes looked red and tired.
"You said you would never leave me." she said in almost a whisper.

guild weighed heavy on Briinah's heart. She had said that one night when her mother had one of her night terrors. She hated to see her so upset. She embraced her tightly and cried into her mother's lap. "I'm sorry mother! I'm so sorry! Please don't cry anymore!" She would have done anything in that moment to stop her crying. After a long while Ah'brii started to stroke Briinah's hair and her sobbing subsided. "It's okay, you are safe now."
They just sat there a while, Briinah's head in her mother's lap and her stroking her daughter's hair.

Ah'brii's hair looked the same, fair and long. It was not as long as Briinah's. Her hair had always gotten frail and would break when it reached the middle of her shoulders. She had told Briinah to never cut her hair unless she had to. She let her hair grow out for as long as it would continue to stay strong and beautiful. She still hadn't cut it since that day.

They both seemed calm again. Ah'brii was happy to have her back home. And Briinah was happy so see her mother calm again and not crying. But part of her felt trapped. This cycle was becoming familiar. She tries to get out and explore, and she has to come back to care for her mother. If anyone was at risk of dying of worry it was Ah'brii. Atleast she made it seem so.

Briinah needed a way out. She couldn't live cooped up like this, like her mother. If she did she would end up just as frail as she was. She didn't know how yet, but one day she was going to become a hunter and be strong like her father.

Her bow! She sat up abruptly. Her mother looked worried but she gave her a reassuring smile. She had left it on the porch before coming in. She already knew what Nitoh had probably done with it. Her heart was in her throat with anticipation as she opened the door to look outside. Her bow was where she had left it. only it had been ripped to pieces, even the string was snapped. Her heart sank, but she was too tired from crying to cry anymore. She quietly closed the door and went to her room for the rest of the day.

Prentice Journal
✍ entry 4
Restless Feelings and Bergchi's Shrine

Briinah was walking up the mountain path to Bergchi's shrine, and reflecting on her life.
After everything Tendaji had been through, somehow things always managed to be fine in the end. Life eventually returned to normal. People younger than her had gone to war and died. Innocent lives had been lost. Peoples rose up and were liberated. It was all so intense. Meanwhile Briinah had managed to get through it unscathed. It all seemed so unfair. She wasn't sure how to feel about it.

Nitoh had kept her sheltered, and that it seemed, was the reason they were so lucky to get through it. But it also starved her of real world experience. Sure she had run away a few times, once going as far as Jauhar to help refugees. That was a mistake, she had no idea what she was doing and wasn't emotionally prepared. Briinah had taken care of her sick mother her whole life, but war was not something she knew how to handle. So she stayed at home, waited for the next disaster to blow over and get on with her mundane day to day life.

But how long could she keep doing this? Life was not about hiding away in a forest. She had never kissed a boy, or see the ocean, or hunted a wild capramel! The thought train paused when Briinah stopped at one of the road shrines. They were humble things, simply a few stacks of rocks. She knelt down and built her own small one, three rocks high. "Bergchi guide them" she muttered to herself.

Briinah was rather superstitious, but wasn't very good at being religious. She had only been to the shrine a handful of times in her life. She went with her father a few times, then once by herself after he had gone missing, then only once or twice when Nitoh would guilt or shame her into going. Bergchi hadn't helped her find her father, maybe she wasn't good at those sorts of things. Maybe Chi wanted him for herself. Briinah couldn't begin to understand the motivations of the gods; why they helped some times, and didn't others. Now she was just looking for some sort of guidance. Briinah wasn't sure what she was going to get out of it, but it couldn't hurt to ask the mountain goddess for help.

She continued her quiet walk and eventually made it to the shrine. The stone representation of Bergchi was lightly powdered in snow and was surrounded by hundreds of tiny stacked stone shrines. Briinah knelt down and dug a shallow hole with the assistance of the sharp side of a rock. She pulled the splintered remains of her bow and placed it in the hole. She covered it with dirt and made another little rock stack on top of it.

Her father had been on her mind a lot lately. She knew if he were with her now, he would have some great dad advice for her. Something like, "Keep your chin up! You can be a great hunter too one day, you just have to keep trying!" Being a hunter like her father had always been her dream. She thought that if she were a hunter too, they could go on trips and spend more time together. She was robbed of that chance, and now her mother and grandfather were trying to keep her from living her life in his memory.

"Bergchi... please guide me on the path that would make my father proud." she prayed.

She began to realize that when she thought about her father, the worries of the world melted away. Her path had been there the whole time. It was in the trail he had blazed. She merely had to stand up and take it. She made her way back home feeling a little less lost. Weather it was by Bergchi's help or not, it was something.

Prentice Journal
✍ entry 5
Funeral Day

The air was chill and the sky was grey and drizzling. To Briinah it felt as if the Sauti sky was gently weeping. A fitting day for a funeral. she thought. Not even the sky could console her. Today was the day Briinah buried her mother.

That morning she had helped pick out an outfit for her; selected jewelry that had both been meaningful and beautiful. She thought about it practically, "Mom would be comfortable in this" and "She hated the way the chain tangled in her hair." She even helped Nitoh make her mother presentable. One of the healers had offered to stitch Ah'brii's shell of a body back into place and Briinah was grateful for that. She wanted to remember her as a beautiful and graceful caretaker. But no amount of makeup and stitches would make that memory true.

Ah'brii hadn't been the most graceful, or beautiful, or a caretaker. Briinah had been a caretaker to her mother in truth. Nitoh had given her much needed guidance as well as rules and restrictions. But he had not been her caretaker. It was her father that had been so gentle and caring and reliable. Ah'brii had been better then too. Briinah had to be there for her mother when he was gone. Briinah had been the one to cradle her mother through her night terrors. She had been there to make her tea and get her ready in the morning. Through all of Ah'brii's breakdowns, Briinah had been there to hold her hand and talk her through it. Her mother's illness did not have a name, and it was not easily visible but she had been very aware of her mothers sickness since she was young. It had always made their relationship strained. A system of dependencies and family duty, mixed in with love and heartbreak and strength.

Of all the times Briinah had ran away from home for days or weeks at a time she did not regret it. She thought of them as little vacations from her duties at home. She needed to feel free, like a child, she wanted to be free from the responsibilities that had been placed onto her. But now that Ah'brii would no longer be there to worry about her, Briinah felt differently. She would miss her mothers scoldings. She regretted not being stronger for her mother, regretted making her worry into sickness. She did not believe her mother would ever get better or recover from her mental sickness; but she regretted any cause she had in hastening it. If she had been there for her then, Ah'brii may have smiled more often.

Briinah stared into the earthy hole that her mother now rested in. She watched as friends and neighbors to turns dropping flowers and gifts into Ah'brii's resting place. She felt numb and at the same time full of regret and sorrow. The emotions were so heavy aching she couldn't feel the cold rain on her skin. It wasn't until Nitoh started to fill in the hole that his daughter lay, did Briinah begin to cry. She sobbed hard and let the tears flow freely into the light rain on her cheeks. It all felt wrong. Fathers aren't supposed to bury their daughters. Daughters aren't supposed to say goodbye to their mothers before their wedding day. Nothing was left for her in Dernd.


"If I had been a better daughter; if I had been there for her more; if I had been THERE! I could have done something!" Her voice wavered in frustration.

"What would you have done? What could you have done?" Nitoh argued, "If you had been there I would be filling in dirt over the both of you."

"I don't know!? I would have just done something!" He was right though. She was no match for the Dread Sermal. She would have need the strenght of the village to kill Warren. If she had encountered him in his true form, she would have needed a sacred arrow to even pierce his skin. Briinah's face twisted into a scowled and she kicked a stone into the forest.
"If I had caught him after he turned back into a man I could have killed him. He was injured."

The hunting party had failed to find him in the dark. Even their best trackers lost the trail near the border of Tale. Two days of continued searching had yielded nothing. If he had died they would have found him. She knew her mother's killer was still out there.

"Grandpa, I want to continue the search. I will go beyond Tale and to the islands of Yael and Belrea if I think he is hiding there. I won't rest or settle until I find him and bring justice upon him." Her eyes were cold and righteous. She had never been so sure or serious about a thing in her life.

She could see Nitoh's face twisting into a frown. "I think it would be best if you trained a bit longer before perusing him" She was surprised he had not flat out said no. "I can see you are determined; I just cannot bear the thought of losing you too"

Her grandfathers sorrowful face brought her to tears. She reached out and embraced him tightly. She did not want to cause him any more pain. This was misery. She didn't like the idea of leaving Nitoh alone, but she knew he was deeply rooted in the community and they would be there to support him if he ever needed it. Her roots though, were not so deep. She knew she would have to leave Dernd if she was ever going to grow and become strong enough to avenge her mother.

"I wont go unprepared. I will take the knowledge from my father and the other hunters with me." She looked into his eyes to assure him. "I'm sure I will find allies to aid me as well. It is not as if I will be completely on my own, or alone in the world."

Nitoh nodded in acceptance. She helped him back into the house and visited with the neighbors and friends. She had told some of the hunters her plans to continue the search for her mothers killer. They were overwhelmingly supportive and offered to help in any way they could. Her neighbor, and her fathers closest friend, had offered her one of his bows. She was relived to know that the community would also be here to support her if she need to come back. They did their best to set her up with the equipment and supplies needed for her journey.

The next morning the sun broke through the hazy sky and dawned a new chapter in Briinah's life. Going forward she knew she could no longer run from her duties. Her life was forever changed, again. She could not have expected she would be saying goodbye to another parent so soon. The path ahead of her was daunting. She didn't know how long it would take, or if she would die trying; but she knew she was determined enough to try. She would use all of her strength to bring an end to the cursed child that had unjustly taken her mother from her.

words: 1217 points: 4 prentice journal entry 5/3

The stone steps the before her climbed up and into the mountainside. The view was awe inspiring and it took the breath from her. She could feel the power of the mountain and it all made perfect sense why this was Zena's chosen spot for the capital. She knew somewhere near the top of these steps she would find the vast library. She hoped to find amidst the archives, clues or hints to something more. It's all she could hope for. There was no guarantee she would find anything aside from children's fairy tale stories.

Her quest was bleak but she climbed those steps. She did her best to ignore the ache in her legs so she could appreciate the architecture and small shops tucked into the side streets. She had never been to a city like this, buildings were packed and stacked on each other. The higher she climbed the more lavish and expensive the architecture became. She walked by a shop that was entirely dedicated women's gloves. The leather on one looked so soft she resisted the urge to go in there just to feel it. The others were made of exotic skins, detailed in intricate hand stitched designs, or dyed in colors she had never seen before. She dreamed of one day being able to afford the luxury of fine custom gloves.
She rubbed her hands together without thinking, her worn mitts were hand-me-downs from the neighbor girl back home. They were functional and not at all fancy. She tucked them under her scarf to hide them and warm her hands again.

She was initially turned off by Zena because of the cold, but she had endured harsh winters before. She could get used to it if it meant she could live under a view like this. She began to run out of breath and stopped to rest half way to the library. Briinah sat at the top of a set of stairs and looked down at where she had come. All the little roofs partially covered in snow. A few had plumes of smoke from the fireplace climbing into the clear air. It felt like she could see forever, she couldn't wait to see what it would look like from the top. After a few minutes rest, she continued her trek up the steps. By the time she reached the courtyard of the library her legs were screaming and she dropped herself onto one of the benches. She didn't even care that the seat was freezing cold, she couldn't feel her legs or her bum anyhow.

The building was enormous and looked like it was carved into the mountain itself. The outside was covered in intricate designs and facades. What looked like windows, however, were just carved to look that way. There were no actual windows, just stone.
She wiped the sweat from her forehead and took a few minutes to catch her breath. She watched the locals roaming the courtyard. Some of them looked to be studying books. Others were eating lunch and meeting with other people. It was a good place to just sit and be. She wished she could have shown her mother a place like this. She would have loved the view. She quickly reached up and pushed the tears out of her eyes. She had to take comfort that mother was resting now. No longer would she suffer from night terrors, she could be held by her father again in the embrace of Bergchi.

She stood up and dusted the snow from herself. Walking up to the door of the library felt like she was walking under a giant. Two statues of scholars greeted her on either side of the door. They were cold and uninviting. The door was open and she made her way to the desk. Briinah had expected to see a grizzled old librarian. She was surprised to see a prentice sitting behind the desk. They looked to be studying to become a scribe. They did not look up to greet her or meet her eye.

"Excuse me, where can I find the section for lore and legends?"

"..."

"I also need to find statements about beast attacks and accounts from mass attacks and disappearances..." She realized how absurd this must sound.

This at least got a rise from the receptionist. He lifted an eyebrow at her and presented a piece of paper to her. She approached to accept the pamphlet. It was the directory and the other side of the paper had a map of the library.
The boy simply eyed her wordlessly then looked back to what he was reading.

It was clear this person did not seek to be any further help to her. Briinah studied the small map nervously. The overwhelming size of the place and the fact she had never even been to a library before had her nerves fraying. She picked a spot near "histories" that she thought might contain what she was looking for but she honestly had no clue. She mostly wanted to walk away from the awkward tension building from the person behind the desk.

There were probably hundreds of people in the library, but it was so large it looked sparsely populated. It went back farther into the rock than she anticipated. The bookcases and sections were lit with magic lanterns. Made sense, fire lanterns in a room full of books was asking for trouble. She couldn't see how far back the wall was, everything was so dimly lit and everything had an eery blue hue. She couldn't read the directional signs sticking out of the stacks so she had to walk to them to read them. She felt completely in over her head. Pacing corridor after corridor it didn't take long for her to get lost. It was too dim to read her small map of the building and she was practically running to find an exit or anything familiar.

She could feel the panic rising, she was moving like she was being chased. She made a fast turn around one of the stacks and ran herself into a pillar. The sudden pain and shock dropped her to her knees. Briinah clutched her stinging forehead and small tears squeezed from her eyes. Her task felt impossibly difficult. She was underprepared and overwhelmed. Above all, she felt completely alone and felt she didn't have a friend in the world.

She eventually picked herself back up and found a dim lamp to read the map by. She felt too defeated to continue today, she told herself she would make another effort when she found some help or knew more about how to navigate the library. She didn't know how soon that would be, but she knew today she needed time to gather her bearings.