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 Posted: Sun Aug 25, 2013 1:32 am
She did not consider her days with him a test of patience or endurance. That would make it seem as if she was there for reasons that had nothing to do with how she felt or how he felt, for that matter. Rather, she was stayed with him because she felt that he needed her to. He, with his general dissatisfaction with the world and, more importantly, with himself, and she, with her belief in the simple elegance of the world, in both brutality and beauty, made a quiet pair. He grumbled and complained, and she listened, offering soft comments often contrary to his own, but with no expectation that he abandon his opinions for his. She let him exert force with his words and yielded in a way that spoke more of allowance than submission.
And on the third day, she was given a token of their days. She did not laugh or smile; she never made light of him when he meant his words the most. She considered her words for a while, staring off into the dusk as the light of the day bled away, no ants and bats bothering them then, despite what he had to say. "Do you really think life so terrible? Or is it simply difficult to be reminded that it is fragile?"
"Killing him might signify strength, or it might signify weakness." She looked at him with her pale eyes. "Accepting terrible things doesn't make anything better, it simply means that one teaches oneself to care less about these terrible things."
She softened then, "By deciding to endure this terrible life, as you see it, you have changed nothing at all. You still walk around with guilt weighing you down, it has merely taken on a different form."Ruriska Oh Nose... I'm not really sure what I just wrote, I have rewritten all the stuff Last Night says so many times as quickly as I could manage and now I'm not quite sure if it's at all coherent.
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Posted: Mon Aug 26, 2013 2:07 am
Nose made a sound of irritation. “No matter what mindset I allow myself, whether I hold guilt or not, I am changing nothing. Mercy will still do what he does. If I try to interfere, it will only make it worse. Acceptance does not mean I care less; only that I have resigned myself to seeing and watching and allowing it to just be.” He stared at her solemnly, “I don’t find it difficult to be reminded of such things. I feel it every day, how terrible this world can be. But my feelings are inconsequential.” Amorpheous I'm a bit like that right now, just 'ADLHSAAKEYBOARDGOWHATAREYOUSAYING?'
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Posted: Mon Aug 26, 2013 10:27 am
Eve never felt irritation in response to Nose, much less expressed anything akin to it; that was his domain, one that she did not begrudge him since he carried such a large burden already, to let him express discomfort at her did not burden her at all. She returned his gaze calmly, "It is true that you have not changed your son's situation, and likely cannot except, as you say, kill him, though perhaps it is because you are too close that what you say and do means nothing to him."
"Regardless, it is not his situation that can be changed, but yours. In the past have you not already lived in state of acceptance? Though you did not see it quite in the same way, was it not inevitable to once again witness his violence?" She fell silent for a moment before continuing, voice gentle. She would never ask him to believe, but she would ask him to listen. "Your guilt, unfounded for not even the best of fathers could prevent violence in their child if they were born with it, remains unchanged, except now, if you choose to truly accept his violence, you must live with the additional guilt that you now accept it more truly than you ever have before."
"So in essence, you will have changed nothing and everything for the only life you are truly capable of changing." Though she could not imagine his sadness for she lived mostly unfettered in life, she still felt a type of sorrow for him.Ruriska Haha, I'm just letting Last Night say whatever comes to mind. I just attempt to edit my brain vomit for coherency.
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Posted: Fri Aug 30, 2013 12:49 am
Amorpheous I'm not sure if I'm managing the coherency part. xD I think we've met requirements btw, so we can try breed them whenever now! 8D The buck dropped his head to the earth, closed his eyes and sighed. They could talk in circles forever. Guilt or no guilt, in the end, what was the difference? "I can’t simply let it go. I’m not capable of that. It’s easy to say, ‘it isn't your fault’ and you can know that it’s the truth but emotions aren't swayed by logic. And you, why do you even care? What are you getting out of my problems?"
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Posted: Fri Aug 30, 2013 9:44 am
"You are right that emotions are swayed very little by logic." She paused, settling her head on the ground next to his lowered head. "It is not guilt that is not yours that is necessarily what saddens me, for that is the way of life, to take responsibility and to experience tragedy, but that you let it define you so."
She smiled soft for a brief moment before sobering once more, "How much of you is drawn into your son's fatal gravity and how much are you separate from something that, in the end, is out of your control and fault?"
"As for me. Your sadness has, in some ways, become mine, just like the crane's pain became yours. Though I don't feel responsible for it and it is not mine to feel, I feel perhaps that you need to be reminded that guilt does not steal one's beauty of spirit that you are a kin unto yourself."Ruriska Ahhh, he's coherent. I'm going back and realizing that there are things that I wish she had said a little different because some things don't accurately express her opinions. It's close, but a little off. Like her bit on terrible things, that's not quite how she's sees it. We can continue though until a natural end (which can probably be pretty soon, within the next 1-3/4 posts)? This rp has made me realize how much I enjoy playing her and her personality and now I kind of want to ascend her (though still focusing on Ember).
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Posted: Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:28 pm
"We all can't be like you," he said bitterly. Nose was jealous. She stood apart from the pain in the world and yet still seemed to understand it better than he did. Amorpheous She'll make a really lovely Legendary. <3
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Posted: Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:51 pm
"The Swamp would hardly be a place worth living in if we were all the same," she said evenly. She meant it too. She was comfortable and content with her place in the Swamp, a kin wholly unto herself answering only the calls that she created for herself and creating meaning in a place where it would be easy to claim there was none, but that did not signify a place higher or better than any other. "Beauty and life come in many forms, in passion, in serenity, in sorrow, in pain, and even in guilt. All these forms, however, should end as all things must end. As the living, we should savor these fleeting pleasures for these unique kindnesses and cruelties are finite, while life in its infinite beauties is eternal."
"The Swamp was not made for us to all be the same. You and I, we are both here to bring something different to our world, something equally beautiful."Ruriska ♥ Ahhh, so many plans. I'm going to start the blessing rp~ Jun's going to be blessing them with Cue!
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Posted: Sun Sep 01, 2013 10:53 pm
It was hard to him to take in what she was trying to say. To him, she seemed like an idealist. His own nature was negative and his continued to whisper to him about how ridiculous it was to think he or Mercy really brought anything beautiful the world. But he could see how she did and so he was silent. "Well," he said after a time, "should we go to sleep now?" Nose was, to be quite honest, tired of trying to understand himself.
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Posted: Sun Sep 01, 2013 11:45 pm
If he were to say that she seemed idealistic, she would disagree and say that she was a realist. All kin and all things were capable of beauty because all kin had different concepts of what beauty was. She accepted them all because it was not her way to fight the nature of anyone else, to make them fit in accordance to her own.
She let him have his silence and though she could not hear his thoughts, she could imagine his point of view quite clearly now. Despite this, she too was silent because there were times to express her views and there were times to let him think for himself. When he suggested they go to sleep, she agreed easily and simply closed her eyes in response. She did not need to tell him that regardless of whether or not he understood himself, she would never force him to change, only try to alleviate his suffering. It was with his voice fading away in her ears that she drifted off to sleep at his side, quiet and unmovable as she ever was.
Ruriska I think we could end it here, or one more post if Nose has something to say/get out of his system as Last Night sleeps beside him.
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