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He didn't know what else to say and wasn't entirely sure he could speak past the lump in his throat anyway and so Bereck eloquently said; "Mmmh," and wound his fingers into the material of Alina's shirt, the tension in his bony frame ebbing slightly. It was alright. He loved her. She loved him. Aleck was... well not happy but not preventing them. The kisses were good, as was the embrace. A little more tension unwound; his fingers relaxed and he stroked her arm. His fears had not come to pass... at least not the ones about Aleck.

"We'll make it work. We'll make time, this time. I won't let go again; I need you." He did, for all the reasons he had poured out to her. He was still afraid, still in pain, still couldn't sleep properly, still couldn't imagine adapting to life here.... But he had Berath, he had Aleck and - amazingly - he had her. With the three of them in his life what did he have to complain about?

"Yes, I know." He also knew that words, however well meant, were not enough to hold everything together... but they would both be trying; he just had to believe that they had managed to learn from their mistakes.

Bereck gave a soft sigh, relaxed a little more along with the quiet sound. A moment later however he made a rather more discontented noise and shifted slightly as his side started to twinge, warning of worse pain if he didn't alter his position. The pain remained, but at least stopped threatening to flare up.

"I think he might like that; it's worth asking him," Bereck added slowly after a brief silence. "Give it a few days perhaps though?... Mmh, I like the hugs idea too." He didn't like that he needed so much support but he was glad that it was there, that there was somebody he could confide fears in now.

"I need to get out of here," Bereck murmured quietly after a moment more. "I've been in here too long, months in this bed without even standing. Having the firelizards has helped but I want to be able to do things." He wanted to see Berath, to be able to touch her again. He wanted to see the sky and feel a breeze, if this sharding muggy climate had any to offer. Speaking of offers, other healers had offered to take him out in a wheeled chair since Becka. He had refused. He wondered whether he should confide that in Alina, and what she would say if he did.

"Mmh." Bereck shifted uncomfortably again, but this time the discomfort wasn't physical. "They've got weyrs built properly again have they? I suppose that was what that feast was all about wasn't it?... Well I'll have to lay claim to one sooner or later." He turned his face away from the nuzzling a bit, eyes downcast. "I highly doubt I could walk any distance at all even with a cane, and support." The idea of being out of here did appeal though... but if he still couldn't walk then he still couldn't take care of himself. He was sure Alina would be willing but he didn't want her to have to be, especially so soon after reconciling.

"...So I'll have to start work on that," Bereck went on, trying to shake himself out of being so pathetically self-pitying. He looked back at Alina and tried to smile. "One step at a time, quite literally. It won't be so bad... if you'll help me?" Aleck had already offered that, and he had accepted; he didn't like the idea of showing that much weakness to his son, but it was weaker still not to try and he knew Aleck would be hurt if he shut him out.

Bereck grimaced and nodded. "No chairs; I think that might kill whatever pride I've got left." The rest of what she said was... well it was a platitude but he didn't mind so much from her and it was sort of comforting, and it wasn't as if she was promising that he'd be totally fine like some people had. Closing his eyes Bereck lent into her again and kissed the corner of her mouth briefly. "Thank you."

Bereck may have melted a little bit when she kissed him. Just a little. "Mmmmm, I needed that," he murmured, resting his brow on hers. "I wouldn't leave you 'Lina. It's worth fighting for this." More quietly he added; "For you."

Why hadn't he fought harder twenty years ago?... Well he supposed there wasn't much point asking himself that now; simply chewing over old literature didn't allow you to advance in any field. He could perhaps think about it more at a later date - if he knew why perhaps he could avoid the same pitfalls again more easily - but right now he didn't want to weigh himself down with any extra regrets or sadness. She was here now, and that was what mattered most.

"So, we should come to an agreement on something." Bereck gave Alina a gentle squeeze and a small but genuine smile tugged at his lips and crinkled his eyes. "Would this be our new anniversary, or do we use the old one? The third option I suppose is to use both, and have two."

Bereck quirked a bigger smile as Alina bumped her nose against him. As she spoke his expression morphed into a thoughtful frown. "I'm not sure exactly, I've rather lost track of the days in here.... Must be four and a bit months though I suppose? Testing both would be best; scientific rigour is important." His tones were entirely serious, but it was probably obvious that he was being silly. Mainly. It really did sound like a good idea to celebrate both, at least at first....

Oh lovely.

He could have done without that.

Bereck groaned. "About four months until our previous anniversary date. That makes it about two until my nameday." Bereck flopped back against the pillows a bit more. "Fifty percent of the sum of the first nine prime numbers," he muttered under his breath, but not so quietly that he wouldn't be heard; he had devoted some time to thinking that one up and wasn't going to let his effort pass unnoticed.

Bereck let a short little breath out through his nose; a sound of wry amusement. "I think I spent about half an hour debating how to obliquely reference my age, or impending age. If I have to be fifty I might as well watch people trying to work out how old I said I was.... Thank you." He smiled a little at Alina, because he believed her even if he still dreaded the date. "I'm sure I shall get used to it; I can remember I wasn't especially thrilled to turn forty. Or thirty. I think twenty was the last decade I was even remotely excited about, and I seem to remember I was more preoccupied with some project or other at the time than with no longer being a teenager."

Age wasn't all that important, and pinning so much significance on a single day was frankly ridiculous - it wasn't as though he abruptly aged for forty to fifty when the date arrived - but it was ingrained in culture and unfortunately ingrained in him too. Once you reached twenty five or so who wanted to be physically any older?

Bereck returned the brief kiss, and as their lips pressed together an important point occurred to him; he had a woman draped all over him, and it wasn't exactly private here. Luckily he had a flitt for that.

Scalpel blinked an sat up, extracting himself from the faire-heap as he got a mental nudge. Guard? Well, alright. After a yawn and a stretch the blue launched himself into the air and fluttered off to find a perch from where he could spot anyone approaching the bed.

"You're right," Bereck agreed with a small shrug, "I actually forgot and didn't notice until a couple of days later, whereupon I lamented being thirty and extremely sleep deprived. Still, that was a long time ago now. As for the rest," he twitched a momentary smile, "I must confess I do, not that I often drink a lot these days. Always seems to be too much to do to take a evening off, to end up sleeping more than intended and not as sharp as I could be when I do wake up." He was going to need to find more time off now; maybe there would be time for indulging in more than a glass of wine once in a blue moon as well. He had no intention of getting regularly drunk, or ever so drunk that he ended up seriously hungover... but he had enjoyed sharing a bottle with Alina back then, and being a little sillier than usual.