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 Posted: Mon May 25, 2015 12:19 pm
When the stallion declined the invitation to eat, Mihr could wait no longer. She was absolutely, positively ravenous -- her earlier meal had been disrupted, and she'd already been hungry before her own foolish kill. Funny, really, that the spirits seemed determined to give her venison.. . .not that she minded in the least. Without hesitating, she began feasting upon the kill, savoring the tender meat, gorging enough to satisfy her empty belly without becoming overly full.
Oh, she wanted to eat the whole thing. Part of her knew it to be foolish not to -- who knew when she might next eat again? But, with her wing damaged, and her body in less than prime condition, she didn't want to weigh herself down. There were still beasts out there. Just because she had Darius with her did not mean she was safe.
Thankfully, though, having a good meal seemed to help her mood immensely. She felt better, felt stronger, and was relieved that she had some more time on her side. Every day was a battle, a fight. . . but right now, for one bright shining moment, everything felt as if it would be all right. In fact, for the briefest of seconds, Mihr actually felt good. Happy. Content. And that was . . . . terrifying, really. As soon as she let her guard down it would all be over. . . something would attack, or she'd forget about her bloodlust.
Still, right now . . .she was okay, and that was something, no matter how temporary.
Purple ears flicked as the stallion questioned on why she received such treatment. The mare herself knew she was not as frightening as others out there, and she certainly was no walker. But . . . perhaps she should let him know. It would only be fair, after all. Lifting her head, Mihr gave a small shrug. "I am covered in blood that will not come off. I am an angeni that spills blood upon their lands to live I have no power to bless them, I have no way to protect them from the real monsters. I have . . . hunted familiars thinking them prey and I . . . " she hesitated, hating to confess it, but needing to, more than ever. "I sometimes lose it. If I feel cornered, or am starving, the monster in me does come out. I am a monster, Darius. . truly." She needed the stranger to see it, needed him to know of its truth.
Why couldn't he see it?
Why couldn't he believe?
"It's why I must be alone. It's why I . . . I can't come with you." There was bitterness in her words, for the mare had been shocked and surprised by the stallions generous offer. To go to some herd, to get help with her wing, to have safety while she healed. . .it was something Mihr wanted more than anything else in the world. Her heart ached for a place to belong, a place to be accepted, but . . . . it would be a risk. What if she felt threatened or cornered or lashed out in a need to feed? What would happen if she lost herself to that darkness that lurked within her heart?
"It . . it is too kind of you to offer, really. But I could not put you or your family at risk. You've done so much already, I . . . I won't burden you much longer. Truly. I will be all right." And he, and his herd, would be safe.
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Posted: Sun Jun 14, 2015 9:34 am
If there was one thing Darius excelled in...was listening.
He was not the smartest of soquili, nor was he a brilliant fighter or even knowledgeable in anything worthy of praise and recognition. However, when he was serious about something he had an ability to truly think about every word which reached his ears; and his heart pitched into to truly take every syllable to his core; emotional and moral. He had stared at Mihr as she confessed all the hints she'd previously dropped as to why she thought so darkly of herself...why she had given herself the title of monster in her books.
Darius glanced only momentarily at the meal she had at her hooves, satisfied she'd at least eaten enough to get some of her strength back and aid her body in the extensive healing process that was soon to come.
Dipping his head he rose from his laying position, not coming any closer and not retreating; he took a moment with shadowed eyes to think about a reply...even though he knew in his heart the point he was ready to make. He inhaled, and let out his breath slowly.
"You're not a monster!" He snapped, loudly but not aggressively. "I refuse to believe it to be true, Mihr." His head lifted, eyes locking onto her own with a resolute fire behind them; glowing seemingly a little brighter than before. "A real monster would not want to protect anything, they wouldn't care. They wouldn't make up excused to why they are a monster - they would brag about it...and that's not how you're talking." If only he could make her see what he could see before him.
A mare misunderstood.
A mare who was not like the masses, and in times of great evil lumped in a category un-befitting her soul.
"You don't have to live this way...the way you've been living. Surviving is not a crime!" Darius let out a shuddered breath, a thought he'd had as a foal ready for death with no one in the world to call his own until that fateful day. "A monster would want to come back to my home, to continue a warpath of destruction...They wouldn't sound sad about it like you do! Mihr....come back with me. At my side you will never be in a corner, and I will make sure you never go hungry...so please. My family can take care of themselves, you would not be able to enter the herd lands if you are truly evil with the wards in place; their holy light would drive you off. Mihr....try. If you cannot enter I will accept it...but I will not stop until you try or strike me down; you chose."
He folded his ears back, every word resonating from the depths of his soul. Not a syllable a lie as he continued to keep his full attention on the blood spattered angeni before him. "If you cannot enter, then I will stay with you till I deem you completely healed. Its okay to be greedy, once in a while." Especially for her, for in his eyes she had been so selfless to thrust herself into solitude to keep harm from others. "No one truly wants to be alone..."
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Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2015 1:49 pm
Mihr couldn't fight it anymore. To watch the dark stallion rise, to see him so valiantly argue that she was no monster, to come to her defense when he knew so little about her. . . It was so kind of the stranger, and his resolve was clear. She could keep arguing, keep fighting, but the purple horned mare was tired. She didn't want to keep fighting anything -- be it fight for food, fight for life, or even fight Darius over a label. They would have to agree to disagree, but she would accept this stallions help . . . even if it did go against her nature. She'd just have to be careful about it, and keep herself a bit aloof.
While she doubted she'd be accepted, she simply could not keep fighting with the kind stallion. He seemed to want so desperately to believe in her, to believe in the goodness within... Maybe she could indulge him. Hell, who was she fooling, by agreeing she was indulging herself. Perhaps it was foolish to give herself hope, but . . . it was hard to doubt when another was trying so hard to keep the faith. This glowing eyed stallion almost made her want to believe in her own goodness. . . but the blood on her body, and he pain in her wing, would keep her grounded.
She wouldn't trust this herd of his, just as she wouldn't trust herself. But it was a place to go, and a place to heal. Mihr didn't want to let this stallion down, to break his heart or his hope, so she would take his offer. Having fed she felt better in control of herself, and was more certain she wouldn't fall to aggression anytime soon. It was clear Darius was no threat, so she would . . . concede. She knew not where his herd might be, and she feared the judgment that would surely come about, but . . .for now . . . maybe . . . she could pretend that everything was all right.
". . . you are so kind, Darius. Your belief in me almost has me believing it myself," she confessed, a small smile -- quite foreign but quite sad -- crossing her features. Still, the expression faded as quickly as it arrived, even as she dipped her head. "I . . .I will take you up on your offer, then. We can go to your herdlands and we will see what comes of it." Her anxiety peaked as soon as she gave her word, but she wouldn't fight him. He was too kind, and for once, it would be good to lay down her defenses, at least for a time.
"Just know now that I can't promise to stay, even for the duration of my healing. I will leave if I think it best for your family. . . I . . . I just don't want you upset if I disappear." Strange really -- why should Mihr care what a stranger thought or felt? Still, this Darius had been nothing short of a hero, some dark knight come down, and she did not wish to cause him pain. Not when he put so much faith in her, and had offered her kindnesses previously unknown.
"I will do my best, though, not to disappoint."
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