|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 6:43 pm
 Pandora the Angry Banana Slug Name: Pandora the Angry Banana Slug Gender: Female Physical Description: 5 foot 6 Inches tall, eyes are black and attached to long stalks, bright yellow in color, oh…and I’m a ******** banana slug what the ******** do you think? I wear a long blue tube top…but it’s not slutty, so friggin back off, I have no arms! What the ******** am I supposed to do with straps? Don’t judge me! Jeez. Oh, and yes. I leave a slime trail. It’s clear and it doesn’t stink or whatever so DEAL WITH IT! I’m a slug! I’m not a ******** unicorn that poops rainbows! I’m a slug. I have slime. ******** off! Personality/Background: Yeah so I was all being a banana slug…like you do. And then a wizard went to throw me into his potion bucket. a*****e. So I slimed that fat b*****d’s hand and fell into some kind of growing potion and was suddenly 5 foot 6. So I did what any chick would do and beat that a*****e with a baseball bat. I dunno how I lifted it…since I don’t have arms…it’s homestarrunner rules ok? And I know about that because of some time/space distortion WHATEVER. I don’t have to explain myself. It’s like I have invisible arms and if you have a problem with that I’ll introduce you to Mr. Derpynoggin…IT’S WHAT I NAMED MY BAT, OMG GET A JOB! Powers/Abilities: I’m bigger than normal banana slugs, well obviously you douchebag. And I can move things like I have invisible arms, but I don’t have invisible arms because that would be retarded. I might have other powers since there was magic and s**t around when I got big. Dunno, I’ll figure it out so leave me alone I’M COMPLEX! Items I start with: Mr. Derpynoggin…allow me to introduce you ******** class="postcontent-align-right" style="text-align: right">
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 7:16 pm
Taggart the Violent Goblin Name: Taggart the Violent Goblin Gender: Male Physical Description: Taggart, a Goblin as he is, stands only about 2/3rds as tall as the average human, with a lanky frame that looks just right for being felled by the blades of low level adventurers. One might note that he has a rather unstable look in his eye, even by Goblin standards. The main aspect setting him apart from other such Goblins is his dashing dress sense. Sporting a crisp black tailcoat complete with shirt and tie, a proper topper, and sometimes even pants. Thankfully, being born of magic, the Goblin's only "junk" comes in the form of a large belt of assorted tools and a worn looking claw hammer. Personality/Background: Though Taggart may try to convince you into believing one of his many conflicting tales of how he became the most amazing and powerful being to ever walk the ground we stand upon, he actually started out life as most Goblins do, in service to a generic evil overlord of darkness and/or doom. Perhaps due to some user error in his magical summoning, Taggart was always the "special" Goblin. Whatever happened though, Taggart ended up abandoning his former master (To aforementioned masters relief) in order to pursue his modest goal of ruling over everything ever. As uncanny as his ability to think of fancy titles for himself is, he is fairly terrible at both accomplishing his goal, and even at finding a good reason why he set this goal in the first place. Powers/Abilities: Taggart is of the opinion that he is a super powered warrior infused with limitless magical power...... in reality he is a sociopath with a claw hammer. He has no potential for magic of any kind, but as a Goblin he holds a natural talent for building and tinkering with mechanical devices. Items You’re starting with: The Claw Hammer of Painful De-lifeing - Some say this weapon is magic, those people consist entirely of Taggart Tool of Belts - Belts of tools are for the common riff-raff, so Taggart decided to upgrade. Now it sounds both more powerful, and more stupid.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 8:41 pm
Arella the Animal-Taming Bucket Name: Arella
Gender: Lady
Physical Description: Arella... is a bucket. A metal bucket, to be precise (or a pail, if you'd prefer). A crack in her metal is used as a mouth, and at some point in time, someone glued some googly eyes above that, thus granting her the gift of sight. Whoever decided she could use some eyes also improvised arms in the form of two coat hangers, which have been haphazardly taped onto her sides.
Personality/Background: Arella is somewhat clueless, even for a bucket. Or, perhaps, she's completely out of her mind. Whatever the case, she spent much of her life communicating only through the mimicking of various animal sounds she heard whilst following around wild critters. Upon being found by a schizophrenic fellow, who mistook her clangety metal bits for the Holy Grail, she learned to speak English through his insane mutterings.
Unfortunately, these insane mutterings of things such as eternal life also led Arella to start believing that she has hidden abilities that she has not yet discovered. Which she doesn't. She's just a sentient bucket.
She also tends to think that she can hear animals talking to her, and she also is under the impression that she understands the sounds and body-language animals use. But don't be fooled; Arella literally knows nothing about animals, and her “animal facts” are more or less the result of insanity or compulsive lying. Despite this, animals seem to gravitate toward her, but perhaps this is solely because her buckety bits are always full of food.
Powers/Abilities: Arella is surprisingly adept at taming animals, but she can't really do anything else. She's hardly even a proper bucket. If she focuses hard enough, though, she's capable of actually carrying things.
Items You’re starting with: An assortment of foods and treats used to feed the various animals she tames.
Also, an extra roll of tape and a bottle of glue in case her arms or eyes start to fall off.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 12:56 pm
Name: Detective Misterson (totally not Martin the Covert Pirate) Gender: scurvy dog...erm...lad Physical Description:  <--- That. (Martin is basically wearing clothes over his pirate gear. He's actually wearing two hats and two coats, one pirate and one not. He has a peg leg...but has a shoe smaller than his real leg shoe to compensate. He's also wearing some kind of weird metal mitten thing over his hook hand, hiding it poorly. Not to mention the horrible fake mustache & beard with the glasses.) "Yar....Ya really think I should describe meself? I be a pirate....erm...me be a private investigator. Detective Misterson be me name. No way me could possible be a pirate. That's ridiculous. Me like fish, fruits, and the ocean. Not because pirates on the ocean....no no, me just like the salty water smell."Personality/Background"Me was once the proud pirate Derpbeard! Erm....me once caught and arrested Derpbeard. He totally didn't escape from the brig and on the run from the law. Me likes long walks off the plank...erm...long walks on the beach and picture shows. Except for Orlando Bloom...that dog ain't no pirate...I would know..because me arrested plenty, yeh."*he slams his foot down and a wooden thunk is heard. Totally not a peg leg in that small boot* Powers/Abilities"Me be the best plunderer on the seven seas! ...erm....me be good at accounting. Me also a good cartographer...from reading books, yar. Me also good with directions. Thar be Super North, Hyper West, Dixie South, and Red East. Me also be good at persuadin'. Comes with the job, yar."Items You’re Starting With:"Yo-ho! erm...Yo ho is the name of me trusty sidearm. Me can shoot with the best of 'em. Me be a astoundin' swashbuckler. Me trusty sword Derpblade...which me confiscated from Derpbeard..."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 2:14 pm
The Land of Platinum Clover is a strange and interesting place. It is a country of many varied people and creatures. Sometimes these beings get along, and sometimes they don’t. There are many kingdoms throughout the Land of Platinum Clover. At the heart of the country is the capitol, The City of Animus, which was founded by animal people, but is the most diverse kingdom of all. Whenever something major happens in the country, the leaders of all kingdoms will converge in Animus. The central building which houses the royal family of Animus is the Clover Citadel. This beautiful platinum building is striking and impressive as it towers over the kingdom. Today, Animus’s leaders, Holden the Dancing Wolf and Kohaku the Sweet-Smelling Ocelot have called all available citizens of Platinum Clover to meet in the main square of Animus for an important announcement. Large screens loom around the square to enlarge the images of Holden and Kohaku, similar screens have been placed in the squares of other kingdoms, so that even citizens who were unable to make the journey to Animus may hear the announcement. Holden shifts from foot to foot, as he is always in a state of dancing. At the moment, his movements look a bit nervous. His delightful smelling wife, the Ocelot Kohaku pats his shoulder trying to re-assure him. It seems to work, though it’s difficult to feel nervous around a lovely Ocelot who currently smells like freshly cut roses.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 8:06 am
*Martin the Cover Pirate is walking around Animus' city streets, totally not trying the blow his cover...in public....in the nation's capital...yeah. He notices the screens appear* "Yar....what be this? Did they find that Derpbeard finally? Ye scruvy dogs forgot that I'm already on the case." *"Detective Misterson" as he calls himself now, is so relaxed for some reason that he's starting to believe his own cover story. His peg leg wobbles in the small boot placed over it. He strokes his real beard under his fake beard out of curiosity as he waits for the announcement.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 3:48 pm
Pandora slimed her way over a crowded sidewalk, making that sidewalk her b***h. Citizens either shot her angry looks or avoided her gaze as she crawled her way to the main square. A few people stood between her and a rather good screen viewing spot. She prodded them aggressively, though not mortally with an aluminum bat. The bat had the words "Mr. Derpynoggin" scrawled in angry red paint on the side.
"Oh my ******** Jeff! Move the hell out of my way you wads! Quit hogging all the good spots. Jeeeeeeeeeff...this better not be a waste of my freaking time. Frig...friggidty frig frig...."
She boredly prods a small robot as she waits for the announcement to happen. The robot looks like it wishes it had a self-destruct button.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
![[Kold]'s avatar](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/5c/8d/6fc324e7168d5c_flip.png?t=1501360374_6.00_01)
