|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Sun Oct 30, 2011 5:13 pm
Aila was certainly more than accustomed to both seeing and experience various degrees of wounds, but this offered no reassurance against reminding her own inabilities to defend the people around her. Izaya would likely note a subtle sharpening of her features and the slightest lowering of her brow. "I can assure you that every word was my own," she said curtly.
Though Izaya may have felt that he refuted her summarily enough, Aila would not grant him the satisfaction of letting the subject alone. "I'll be frank," she said, not bothering with the formality of rhetorically asking permission, "I don't care. Neither expectation nor necessity have anything to do with the fact that I favor your company and worry for your well-being. What I 'know' about friends impacts that in no way." It was not with perfect nonchalance that she said what she did, however; her tone carried a distinct air of reluctance and her features betrayed a minute embarrassment. This wasn't the sort of conversation she was accustomed to.
"What does Asch have to do with this?" she asked, genuinely confused by the sudden jump in subject matter. "What would he be jealous about? That's silly."
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Oct 30, 2011 5:41 pm
Jerome had no reason to knock on the door, it was his room after all, and after getting off shift. He was kinda just looking forward to getting back to his room, and chilling out.
The door opened very suddenly, and without warning. A man, looking Izaya's height, but with a larger build, covered in tattoo's with his dreadlocks pulled to one side, barely got two steps in the room before he looked up, and immediately paused.
... there was a chick in the room, sitting on Izaya's bed.
Jerome remain motionless, his half lidded eyes now showing that he looked particularly surprised.
and then he glanced over to Izaya, who had no shirt.
Jerome held a hand up "My bad bro. carry on."
He turned to walk out. a blue Pignite peering around the black man with a deep annoyed frown on his face.
"... Bit young don't you think?" Jerome asked after another pause as he turned to start back out again.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Oct 30, 2011 6:04 pm
'Favor his company'? She couldn't do that. No one he'd ever known in the history of his life had done that. Sure, it wasn't the same as 'liking' his company, but it was close enough for Izaya's discomfort. Even the following of girls he'd accumulated in high school as a sort of cult...they just needed someone to believe in. They didn't see him as someone to be friendly with.
The few crushes some had had on him had never lasted long. He'd made sure of that. He'd even ended up getting one girl expelled before her crush had faded. So what was this? It wasn't a crush. This was worse. It was harder to get rid off. It was infuriatingly persistent - just like Aila herself.
And what was with the worrying? What was there for her to worry about? As reading expressions and emotions was what Izaya did, the minute hint of embarrassment did not go unnoticed. His mouth became a thin line. "No, this is silly. We're not friends! We never were. We - " He whipped his head towards to door as Jerome opened it.
Glaring at his roommate, he realized what the scene must have looked like. "- We're nothing MORE than friends either!" he finished, raising his voice more so for the benefit of Jerome's hearing and comprehension than Aila's. "We're JUST TEAM MEMBERS."
With a roll of his eyes, Nakura turned his full attention back to Aila while Celty hovered silently behind him. "Why in the world do you worry about me? I don't worry about you. Is it because you think I'm too incompetent to look out for myself, even as a grown man? Whose company do you favor mine over? Over being alone? Wouldn't just anyone do, then?"
Izaya was fully aware these were destructive questions to be asking an uncertain, insecure individual. And Aila, given the way she had been acting at the party and the hints of embarrassment she was showing now, was leaving herself exposed to him. She was being vulnerable. That was what people did in the first step of testing the waters with friendship. Well, Izaya would have none of that. He was essentially ripping her vulnerable side to pieces and sending her back to shore, wanting to make sure he did it thoroughly enough that she would never want to try again.
After all the girl had been through with her mother, her brother, and Marco, he couldn't possibly understand what had made her even try this time. Especially not for someone like him.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Oct 30, 2011 6:49 pm
The stranger that entered - presumably Izaya's roommate - received little response from Aila apart from a slight befuddlement, the implications of his words missing her completely. The suddenly raised tone drew a slight flinch in surprise, but she duly dismissed it with the departure of the unfamiliar Rocket. Unfortunately Izaya's ensuing destructive questions, used against someone who had resolved her will enough to broach the subject in the first place, only served to strengthen that resolve, and that determination overcame any indication of embarrassment in her expression.
"I worry about you because I don't want to see you injured," she countered, a subtle shift in her intonation seeming to allude to the painful marks on Izaya's body. "I could care less if you do the same for me." Though his previous actions - such as bringing her to the infirmary after fainting from exhaustion - were a subtle indication otherwise. "I prefer your company over being alone, certainly. Though I would think that leaving off the prepositional phrase would imply over anyone, as was my intent." Her words adopted a mildly aggressive tone, a similar element stealing into her eyes.
"I've made my decision," she said firmly, though in truth it wasn't a conscious decision that had been made as much as it was a nagging feeling to which she had ceded. "Whether or not you reciprocate is of little concern."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 10:18 am
Well, that backfired pretty badly.
At her remark about him being injured, Izaya looked up from his scrape and folded his hands calmly in his lap as Aila's were in hers. "What does it matter what you want to see? This job is hazardous enough that it's expected for one to receive injuries of some kind or another. I'm sure there are plenty of Rockets around here who think you're an idiot for going through so many sleepless nights overworking yourself, but it doesn't matter what they think, does it? You're going to do it anyway, and there's nothing they can do to stop you."
He got up and stuck his hands in his back pockets, pacing his side of the room in front of his bed. "You're not serious. You and I are constantly bickering. We never see eye to eye. Hahaha..." he chuckled bitterly, putting one of his hands to his face to rub his tired eyes.
"...you must have worse problems than I thought if you prefer my company over anyone else's. This makes you almost no different from those girls I used to 'collect' by shifting their faith to me from their abusive families and boyfriends. That's it, isn't it? Is it your twisted past that's made you warped enough to care for me?"
With another weary smile, he leaned back, tilting his head at her in a sidelong glance. "So you came here solely to tell me that you're determined to be my 'friend' no matter what I think? Isn't that a little one-sided? It's like an un-requited crush. I thought you were above such things, Aila-chan. This is just childish." Nevermind that his own love for humans was pretty much unilateral.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 11:30 am
"It matters in the event that I have the capacity to prevent said injury," she said. "Would you really prefer being wounded over having someone look out for your well-being? You were preaching about 'using' people just a moment ago."
The laughter was met with a perfectly level expression, "You of all people should be aware of just how often I jest." Perhaps this was out-of-character for her, even more so than if she were merely jesting, but that was not a concern to her - nor was it a concern if he continued to insist that she was fooling around. At some point he would be left with no other explanation than that she was being completely serious. "Returning to the subject of things I find interesting, then," she segued, "I find it interesting to speak with you. I find it interesting that we have such different perspectives, and I find it interesting to debate those perspectives. I enjoy it. Is that really such a stretch to comprehend?"
A vaguely amused sound responded to his evaluation. "You're just set on finding some kind of excuse, aren't you? I don't know what you want me to say," a slight shrug and a nonchalant tone, "if it makes you feel better to blame my childhood, then go right ahead. Though it's a bit rude to call someone 'twisted' for as little as enjoying another's company."
A thoughtful hum and the mildest smile, "Perhaps it is childish, but I believe you told me once that I should look after my own interests more. Now that I've decided to be selfish, you've decided it's inconvenient and want to contradict yourself, hm? If we're discussing who's being childish, I would say we're even." Her smile took on a slightly sanguine quality.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 12:03 pm
What was it with this woman and turning his words against him? He was used to doing that to others, but to have it done to himself wasn't near as enjoyable. She was so young and obediant, too. Since when did she learn to feed people their own medicine?
"There are some things you can't prevent. Shizu-chan, for example," Izaya spat, as if the name were a curse word. It was peculiar to hear with a suffix of endearment attached to the end. "You should know this better than most. Besides, I've had experience with him. You he might have killed without even realizing it. He's reckless and stupid that way."
Hence why he had had to get the ex-bartender away from the party and out into the setting of the city night. Whether it was his pokemon's strength or his own, Shizuo never seemed to know how to excersize control. His rage was too overpowering, so he just gave in to it. What a moron. Why he had decided to take on a job as a bodyguard for Izumi was beyond Izaya, except maybe that the man really had learned to reign in his temper a bit. Still, the informant hadn't been about to risk his other teammates to test that theory. It wasn't for the sake of their well-being, of course, but rather the possibility that he could have suffered some pretty unpleasant consequences for allowing them to be Shizuo's victims.
"Eh..." He turned back to the headache at hand. Yes, he enjoyed a good argument every now and then, especially with Aila. She brought up very good points, and often ended up besting him when he least expected it. There wasn't much he could say to that, since he had fun too. "Arguements aren't all a friendship consists of," he settled with finally, going to find a hoodie shirt. It was getting cold and he didn't like the looks Aila kept giving him when she saw his injuries.
He looked over sharply from his tiny closet when she emitted a sound of what seemed to be amusement. "Hmph. I'm a twisted person. If someone enjoys my company, isn't it natural that I assume they're the same?" He burried his face back among his hangers and clothing, feeling strangely flustered.
Grabbing his hoodie shirt, he slipped it over his head and strode back over to the chair in front of Aila. "This isn't being selfish. This is the opposite! Yes, I said to look after your own interests. What are you doing instead? Concerning yourself with mine, which are none of your business. What's with that smile?" he asked, his own expression verging on the uncomfortable. He liked her smile, but he never thought it would bother him so much.
"If you want someone to look after, why don't you go pester your partner? He's your age, so I'm sure you can have much more interesting conversations. Particularly now that you've met what seems to be an old crush of his," Izaya finished, crossing his arms as he looked away. "I'm sure her seeing him in a dress was absoultely traumutizing for him."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 12:56 pm
"Perhaps not everything is within my power to prevent," she ceded, "but that doesn't mean I can't try, and it doesn't mean I can't take measures so that I can prevent it if it happens again in the future." Such as pointedly carrying pokemon with her capable of inflicting sleep or paralysis. "Aside from that, if you're going to insist that you can take care of yourself, I would kindly request that you not imply that I can't do the same. I haven't earned my place from sitting in a safe little office every day." There were, of course, circumstances where she had been unable to prevent her own injury - just as there were circumstances where she would be unable to prevent that of others. This was a fact of life, though, and she felt that obvious; in fact it seemed almost puzzling that he would try to use such a fact to refute her.
She agreed with a single nod, "Of course. Though arguments aren't the only interactions we have, if I recall." His insistence in aiding her when she was worn out from fatigue, his various efforts to bring her to relax and enjoy herself, his offers to assist her with her work - he'd done more for her than she for him. Whether he was conveniently forgetting these instances or simply chose not to consider them, they were still there.
"Have you ever considered the possibility that you're not as twisted as you keep saying?" she commented. "You have a different perspective of the world, and you take entertainment from different things from most. This makes you twisted? I've seen no evidence of that." And she had not. He was a bit of a glutton for punishment, perhaps, and was far more willing to risk his safety than most would be comfortable with, but none of these things equated to his evaluation of himself.
"If being selfish is pursuing what one wants for oneself without caring for the opinions of others, I would say this fits that definition well enough," she replied, shrugging. At mention of her smile, her expression instinctively sobered, though traces remained in her features, lingering particularly in her eyes.
"No matter how many times you bring up Asch, he will continue to not have anything to do with this conversation," she warned. "I am speaking to you, not to him and not about him." A certain earnestness found its way into her countenance, "I recruited you because I wanted you here. Obviously it has not been without some frustration on my part, but ultimately I like that you're here. You're not going to convince me that I'm mistaken in this."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 4:17 pm
"...I think we've both proven to each other that we're each just as capable of making our own messes as we are of cleaning them up," he said after a time. "You work a lot, you knock yourself out, you rest, you work some more. I poke at people, I get demoted, I behave, I poke at people again. Those are our cycles.There's nothing either of us can do to change either one of them, so why bother trying? That's how we live."
Choosing to ignore her mention of 'other interactions', all of which, as far as he had been concerned, were failures, the man glared at Aila. She seemed trying to see good in him or something. Well, that wasn't going to work; he was sure of it. He was absolutely amoral and self-serving down to the very core, just as he felt all humans were and should have been.
"Well, 'twisted' is a subjective term. I certainly don't attempt self-mutilation or anything like that, but we're criminals. Even criminals know better than to make friends with criminals." He was probably going around in circles with his argument now, knowing Aila could easily come up with something in reply, but he wasn't just about to take this lying down. Metaphorically speaking.
"..." This teenager was beginning to get on Izaya's nerves. Not that he would ever openly admit it of course. "Scratch that. Assuming you're still obediently taking mental notes and following my advice, don't be selfish. Just look out for your own self-interest. You know, strictly as in 'excessive regard for one's personal advantage'. You obviously don't know what's good for you, so your desires can't possibly contribute to your own self-interest. In fact, I'd say they're getting to be downright pernicious."
A groan at the deflection of the topic of Asch. Oh well, it'd been worth a try. "...Just as mysterious and self-destructive as ever," he murmured, gazing at the young lady in front of him. "I'm not saying that I'm ungrateful for your recruiting me, Aila. I just hope you know what you're getting yourself into."
Izaya fixed her with a serious experssion as he said this, legs crossed as all signs of his previous theatrics vanished for a rare moment. "I'm still hoping you're not as invested in me as you claim to be, because I have this horrible habit of stabbing people in the back and letting them down when they are in the greatest need. Especially if it's to my benefit. That's my game, my hobby - to watch them crash and burn as their faith in me is torn asunder and thrown back in their faces." A cold, wicked smile tainted the corners of his mouth as he said this, recalling the past lives he'd ruined. "Do what you like. I can't stop you. Just remember - I gave you fair warning, which is more than I give most."
Getting up, he headed for the door and propped it open, indicating he felt their discussion was over. He didn't really look like he had the energy to refute her arguments or refuse her declaration any longer. "Only because you've been such a loyal client of mine for so many years. This is the extent of whatever preferential treatment I've given you since I've known you outside of Team Rocket. Otherwise...I love you just as much as I love any other human." He offered her a tender, yet somehow guarded grin.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 5:20 pm
"I certainly hope you're not aiming to be demoted again," she said, a visibly perturbed, if not fleeting, frown responding to his words. "Though honestly, if you're presented with a means to eliminate, or at least lessen, the physical pain from your cycle, I'm not sure why you would choose otherwise.
"In any place where a group of people are forced to live with one another, criminals or not, both conflict and friendships will be formed." Or that was what the psychology manuals had implied and what her personal experience and observations seemed to support. "I'm sure there are others besides myself who would call you a friend, whether you return the sentiment or not."
A faint smirk, "Uprooting the seed you planted yourself? If you think my conclusion has been reached solely out of obedience to your words, you would be incorrect - same as you would be if you assume I would completely turn around my perspective merely because you've told me to. Though to be frank, your rationale is a bit hard to sell; unless you miraculously succeeded in tricking me into harm, I'm not sure how calling you a friend would harm me." She was suspicious by nature, after all, even when showing trust.
A brief nod served as assurance that she had indeed considered what she was getting herself into. She was at least passingly familiar with Izaya and his usual behaviors as well as a number of his philosophies - as he told them, at any rate. She was aware that there was likely some risk involved in granting him any level of trust, but she'd already been left with no choice but to trust him when a single misstep on his part could have ruined everything she'd built up. But, even knowing the consequences, he had not taken such a misstep. That alone spoke for his trustworthiness, even if only in whispers.
The cruel grin was met with an expression that was perfectly docile, lips drawn ever so slightly into the faintest of fond smiles; it was a warm, gentle expression that she rarely, if ever, wore. "Well, I'll thank you for the warning, then, if they're so rare," she stood and approached the open door, "and I'll apologize for interrupting you." She bowed her head in farewell and departed the room, moving with as professional and even a stride as she had arrived.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2011 9:19 pm
"Maybe not aiming to; at least not any more than you aim to knock yourself out through work, but I'll admit I did come pretty close when I dragged Asch into the bathroom," he admitted. "Also, I have no reason to believe you could lessen or eliminate anything from my cycle anymore than I could from yours. Put yourself in my shoes, ask yourself the same question, and maybe you'll figure out the answer."
Though he could have happily exchanged witty banter with the girl all day, continuing to joke and tease as he had been for most of their conversation, but Izaya's patience was starting to wear thin and he didn't want Aila to know it. He hadn't meant to 'uproot the seed' he'd planted, but it hadn't quite grown into the idea he'd expected it to and now it was beginning to be a nuisance. When she mentioned others besides herself who would call him a friend, he almost grimaced when faces came to mind. She was right. Again.
Ever heard of reverse psychology? he asked mentally as Aila mentioned how his 'rationale was a bit hard to sell'. He still wasn't entirely sure what the girl's intentions were behind wanting to be his friend and outright declaring it to him, but he certainly didn't intend to make it easy for her. At the very least, he took it as a dare to make her come to rethink her decision. People being close to him was bothersome. He still needed that thick steel wall around his heart and hell if he was going to feel guilty that some girl wanted to sit outside its gates.
The docile, faint, fond smile remained with Grunt Nakura even as he closed the door behind her. He had nothing more to say.
As Aila began to walk away from the room, however, she might have heard the sound of glass shattering and the dull thud of a fist hitting a wall through the dorm room door that had just shut after her.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
