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 Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2011 3:08 pm
He didn't say anything in response to her reasoning, instead he dropped his gaze to the ground, head following as he seemed to try and avoid the topic. In truth it was because he wasn't proud of the way he overreacted. He didn't mean to be so rude to her, he hadn't meant to yell but he couldn't control himself, his head was still so muddled and he felt like he was slowly loosing his grip on what he believed was his reality.
Was this what it felt like to go insane?
He shook his head as she started to talk to him and slowly raised his head up, frowning. Frowns weren't like him they looked odd on his bright features. "They're just glowing bugs, what's so cool about them?" He asked her stepping forward watching as they flitted away from him with every step forward they took. "They don't seem to care for me..." He didn't know if he should feel hurt about the fact but they kept shying away from him.
"Maybe I'm not the male you think I am," that was the only reason he could think of and it just slipped from his lips.
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Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2011 3:16 pm
"They...are my friends." Lucie watched the fireflies shying away from the pink lion with a steadily sinking heart. Had they asked her to bring him just so they could confirm that he was no longer the lion they had once known? Already she could feel the sting of tears at her eyes and she took a step forwards, as if to reason with them.
"They...I'm sorry...I don't understand. I promise you, Mimi...ugh, Jua, they told me to bring you. They knew who you were a moment ago and...I just..." She trailed helplessly and gave him a pained look. His words cut deep and she realised, quite suddenly, that he was right. The accident had changed him. It truly had. And if the fireflies no longer recognised him then...that meant he really was not the lion she had grown up with. But no! No! She couldn't think like that! This was him. He was in there somewhere, hidden with his memories.
But how to bring them back to the surface? She did not know.
"What am I supposed to do?" She whispered. "You are my friend and...and yet you are not."
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Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2011 3:34 pm
"If I was the 'Mimi' you say I am then I was your friend but as Jua, a male who knows little to nothing about you," he paused to suck in a breath, "a male who doesn't remember you or your firefly friends, I am not." He shook his head sadly. He didn't want to say it. He didn't want to hurt her but there was no easy way to do that. "I can try to be your friend but I do not think it will be the same," he sighed. "I'm sorry."
He hung his head low, golden eyes studying the fireflies as they danced away from him. "We change as we grow Lucie, I am not the lion you once knew and I don't think I'll ever be him. Whatever happened to me changed me and I am sorry that it hurts you but I cannot be who I am not, even if I used to be that male," his words were sincere because he did care and a part of him kept telling him that the icy blue female was important to him but his head kept disagreeing.
He didn't like that so many people kept trying to tell him who he once was and who he should be. He needed to figure it out on his own. "If I lost my memories then you can only hope that by some miracle I retrieve them but for now, please accept that I am not you Mimi. I am different and that will not change." He stepped toward her uncertainly. "It's not like there's some magical cure for this."
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Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2011 4:08 pm
She put on a brave face, but she felt as if she were dying inside. He had been her friend. Her only, most dearest friend in the whole wide world. She had never asked for much but even having the company of one friend had been taken from her. Perhaps she should have sought out others, and she did have friends in the loose sense of the word. But...they were not Mimi and...he...he was dead.
"I think...you will be happier away from those who knew you as Mimi." It hurt her to say it but perhaps it was true. It brought him pain and confusion and it hurt her, too, to realise that old Mimi was never coming back. She cared for him but he had no memory of her care and she had to face facts.
He was not going to remember. Not the fireflies. Not her. Nor anything they had shared.
"I'm certain you will become a better lion than you once were. You will find yourself again and...and that person may not be like the one I knew. In fact, I am certain of it."
He had changed and left her behind and she could not ever hope to catch up. He spoke of change, but strangely, Lucie felt as if she were in a void where she stayed the same and everything else changed and became something new. Perhaps the problem was not in Jua, but in herself. Perhaps she was too caught up in her childish games to be able to see it. Perhaps she always would be.
"I believed in magic once." She whispered, mostly to herself. But not any more, were the silent words that followed that statement.
"I...I guess this is goodbye then." She took a small step back, hoping her expression was doing well to mask the grief that she felt in her heart. "Goodbye...Jua."
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Posted: Tue Mar 22, 2011 11:10 am
While she tried to show that his words did not hurt her he could tell that she was pained. It was obvious to him because of their last meeting and he knew that this one was no easier on either of them. They both were suffering but in different ways. If only he had known what she had meant to him before his accident. If only he knew that she was a part of him and that he had loved her but now, now he was a different individual one who was growing based off of the experiences presenting themselves to him now. He could never be the male she wanted him to be.
That was the past, he wasn't even sure who he was in the present. Change was the only thing he seemed to understand.
"I am sorry, I know that I have said it over and over again but I digress," he shook his head as he took a step back. "One day, I do hope that we could be friends," he said carefully aware that his words could easily destroy the small comfort that had wrapped around them.
"I believe you're really saying goodbye, Mimi but never the less...Goodbye Lucie," he turned and ran. He couldn't handle it anymore. He needed to get away.
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Posted: Sun Apr 03, 2011 9:43 am
She closed her eyes to hide her pain, to keep herself from seeing him as he fled from her. From her and the fireflies. And, creeping up beside her, came the soft-footed Laec. The cub moved close, leaned against her hind leg and made a sad little sound.
"Goodbye...why did you say goodbye?"
Lucie whirled around, wrapping her arms around the cub as if he were her own child, and hugged him close, sobbing into his fur. The cub - who was a relation of some description - simply stood and let the female cry into his fur. Around them, the fireflies fluttered quietly, some touching down to rest upon the grieving lioness.
/fin.
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