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Edelsteine

PostPosted: Fri Mar 04, 2011 5:53 pm


themis' expression is one of vague concern, like "This can only end poorly..."

EDIT:
like so, isolated
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 04, 2011 10:32 pm


HEY GUYS COLIN WOULD LIKE HIS BUDDY PLEASE ;-;

He needs a jogging partner. Liek whoa.

Syrie

Garbage Paladin

14,840 Points
  • Unfortunate Abductee 175
  • Married 100
  • Perfect Attendance 400

Syrie

Garbage Paladin

14,840 Points
  • Unfortunate Abductee 175
  • Married 100
  • Perfect Attendance 400
PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2011 11:30 pm


DOUBLE POST IS LIKE DOUBLE RAINBOW. WORLD ENDING.

Of course, right before bed I think of a few things:

Why is he at Hillworth? Was he accidentally terrorizing everyone (faculty included) until they shipped him off? Did he accidentally break a few bones while attempting to maybe join in atheletics? A bit of history on why/how he made it to the boy's reformatory school would probably go a long way. (Colin got in lots of fights until he was expelled~ :9 ) Did someone pull his braid? Try cutting it? Was that something that contributed to his actions that got him moved to Hillworth?

Please add "Thor" to his nicknames - also do understand that Colin, being a Star Trek and comic nerd, will probably try to force/coerce Bjorn into a cape and some headwings [a la Thor].

What about his dad? WE LOVE TO BE NOSEY. DID HE DIE? TELL US OH GOD PLEASE. No, really. I want more background on Bjorn son of Guild and I'm not the only one!

Does he prefer blonds? Okay this one is a joke, but I cannot help myself.

When it comes to shopping for clothes/school uniforms... how does he get them adjusted? Have them tailor made, or just altered to fit/match the dress code? You mention (and we can SEE) that he is MASSIVE - it's not easy to shop for several reasons...(which leads me to my next question) how does he cope with the world not meant for someone so braw and bonny? Like, if he needs shaving cream or a pack of gum or whatever - does he suffer himself to go scaring the DC locals (I'm thinking yes) or would he ask a friend to perhaps pick up a few things for him -- or a combo? (likely).

Re: Underpants - PICS OR IT DIDNT HAPPEN

Name of the Gym he goes to - or does he make-due with school facilities? Does he have a personal trainer/assistant/idk whatever (I know he'd need a spotter for some of the weight-training) -? Tell us moooooar~ >9

...and now that it's nearly midnight where I am, I can finally freaking get my body to sleep. If I think of more, I will blather at you...rather, if I get my brain back, will do so.
PostPosted: Sat May 21, 2011 3:11 pm


Syrie



I'LL GET RIGHT ON THAT


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EVEN THE UNDERPANTS

Edelsteine


Edelsteine

PostPosted: Sat May 21, 2011 4:01 pm


prodding up some booonafide research on this here subject of school policies and expulsions....

Quote:

Statement of Student Behavior
The ------- School District believes that our schools should provide an environment conducive to learning the basic values and standards incorporated in the community. These include the development of self‐discipline and individual responsibilities fundamental to a
democratic society.

Because irresponsible behavior and violations of good conduct can substantially disrupt or interfere with that kind of learning environment, it is necessary to establish and enforce consistent disciplinary regulations and procedures.

Conduct is closely related to learning. An effective instructional program requires a safe and orderly school environment and the efficacy of the educational program is, in part, reflected in the behavior of students and employees. Consequences are viewed as the school’s efforts to maintain the safety and welfare of all students in the school environment rather than as punitive deterrents.

Conduct Progression Levels
The --------- School District has approved a Discipline Policy that categorizes offenses into levels of seriousness. However, the administration reserves the right to determine the seriousness of each individual incident and place it in the appropriate level. It is further
stipulated that any of the levels could lead to a detention, suspension, or recommendation by the principal for permanent expulsion should that action be deemed necessary.

The following Misconduct / Response Structure includes three [3] levels, Level I, Level II, Level III, representing a continuum of misbehaviors, based on the seriousness of the act and the frequency of the occurrence. It is imperative students understand that persistent violations at any and all levels of misconduct will result in more serious consequences.
Incidents of misbehavior will not be viewed in isolation. Prior infractions will be considered when disciplinary decisions are made by the administration.


Quote:
LEVEL III

Refers to acts whose frequency or seriousness disrupt the learning climate of the school or acts directed against persons or property that pose a threat to the health, safety or welfare of others in the school. These acts require administrative action that could result in the immediate removal of the student from school as well as the possible intervention of law enforcement authorities.


    Examples [but not limited to]:
  • Aggravated Assault / Battery
  • Arson or attempted arson
  • Bomb threat or threatening phone calls
  • Continuation of or extreme Level II misconduct
  • Disorderly Conduct
  • Extortion or attempted extortion
  • Fighting
  • Illegal use of technology
  • Lighted or ignited objects
  • Ethnic, racial slurs, intimidation
  • Other violations of federal, state, or local laws
  • Possession, sale or use of firecrackers, cherry bombs, or other fireworks
  • Possession / Sale of stolen property
  • Possession / Use / Transfer of weapons
  • Reckless driving or speeding on school property
  • Terroristic threats
  • Third offense truancy
  • Transfer / Sale / Possession / Purchase / Procurement / Distribution / Use or under the influence of unauthorized substances [e.g. drugs, alcohol or drug paraphernalia]
  • Unauthorized or improper use of school facilities / Equipment / Property / Lockers
  • Unauthorized use of fire alarm or equipment



Fighting
Fighting using physical means to settle a disagreement is not acceptable. Any physical confrontation that may result in school disciplinary action by the administration may also result in the involvement of local law enforcement as well as a severe fine involving the
magistrate or juvenile court system.

Fighting among students on school property or while being transported on
buses does not reflect the respect for other persons and property expected of students. Students engaged in fighting will be subject to DISCIPLINARY procedures according to School Board Policy 234.00. The following actions will be taken in cases of student fights:


  • Students will be examined by the school nurse for evidence of injury.
  • Parents/guardians will be notified.
  • Outside law enforcement agencies will be notified and violators will be subject to a fine in accordance with a disorderly conduct citation.
  • Students will be suspended out of school for three (3) to ten (10) days with an informal hearing within five (5) days for a suspension over three (3) days.
  • Students found to be in violation in civil and criminal court shall be expelled for at least one full school year unless the Superintendent of Schools recommends otherwise.


Addendum Act 35 –
Ordinary citizens can employ physical depend upon the legal standard of reasonable cause to believe (RCTB). RCTB hereafter as the average person, possessed of normal powers of observation and rational thought, would reasonably infer that a person is, has or is about to commit the act in question based upon that person’s behavior. Besides RCTB, one must also consider what the time frame is in regard to the act in question. Anyone can use physical force to prevent or terminate (P/T):

1. The use of physical force against citizen (self-defense) or another, unless:
a. citizen provoked the incident with the intent of injuring the person or a third party;
b. citizen provoked the incident and the other person defends himself, unless citizen clearly communicates withdrawal and is pursued to continue the fight; or
c. citizen is engaged in an unlawful fight by mutual agreement (two people “step outside to settle things”)

2. SELF DEFENSE: The right to defend one's self with as much force as required to ensure safety. The critical elements to keep in mind are:
a. the defense must be necessary – no other way out,
b. the force used must be reasonable under the circumstances.
The defense must be necessary. In order for the defense to be necessary, citizen must be protecting from:
• Imminent harm by unlawful physical assault. If the harm is not imminent, you do not have the right to use force.
• Sexual assault.
• Unlawful detention.
• citizen must be in danger at the present time and not threatened with some future harm.
• citizen may not retaliate for some past harm or attempted harm.

3. GOOD SAMARITAN: The defense of others. Persons have the right to defend someone who in turn has the legal right to defend themselves but for some reason they cannot or will not defend themselves. If subject person has made a reasonable mistake of fact, subject might still be able to plead defense of others, but not always. The use of non-physical de-escalation skills while law enforcement personnel are on the way is the wisest choice. Be a good witness.

4. EXCESSIVE FORCE, violator can be charged with a crime. If law enforcement has probable cause to believe subject person used excessive force, subject will be placed under arrest even if the initial self-defense is permitted
PostPosted: Sun May 22, 2011 12:00 pm


I was wandering around this forum with the intent to crit BUT I CAN'T REALLY DO IT. Reading this profile made me smile, lol. I really like Bjorn!

Um, I'd find it interesting to know if he's faced any sort of challenges because of the way he lives. He's a big guy and a C student, do people take advantage of him a lot because they think they can manipulate him? Or at least try to? Maybe they're too intimidated to try lol. xD He's a really straightforward guy, how does he react to people who aren't up front about their motives and such? Does he notice?

~ not really a crit lol

ANYWAY THIS GUY IS SWELL ;'D

Mundane Egg


Syrie

Garbage Paladin

14,840 Points
  • Unfortunate Abductee 175
  • Married 100
  • Perfect Attendance 400
PostPosted: Sun May 22, 2011 5:54 pm


Colin will protect his friend as much as possible, but he's pretty gullible himself...so I see this being really 'interesting' BAHAHAHA
PostPosted: Tue May 31, 2011 1:35 pm


Why is he at Hillworth?
Words: 1,451



The Superintendent pinched the bridge of her nose just north of the bridge of her spectacles. The motion shifted, moving her fingers beneath the nose pads to relieve the plum-colored pressure marks there. “We have the statements here from the local department, as well as a few affidavits from Bronson & Bronson associates regarding the trial. What we don’t have, other than the official paperwork, is your side of the story, Mr. Guildson.”

He could feel Annbjørg tense next to him, her knuckles were white on the top of her little handbag. It was awkward standing behind the little folding table, a little folding meeting chair unused but there behind his calves. It was like sitting at a plastic, girl’s tea table. He hated how so many American schools equated cheap and functional with professional or authoritative. The school board meeting room felt like a manila envelope turned into a town hall. It smelled like a filing cabinet too, which didn’t help. “Do you want the whole story? Everyone else only asks what matters in court. ”

Anna interrupted from his side, defending him, “He has answered many questions already to the police. It is there on the paper.”

His hand dwarfed her shoulder, but stood pale against the black of her suit blazer. He felt a little pale. He wanted to graduate school and make her proud, even if it wasn’t really necessary to get into a trades guild.

“We do. It is true, in many ways, that this is all a formality. But I’d like to try to help you, Mr. Guildson. If your side of the events corroborates with those of the students who came forward to support you in the hall, maybe something can be done.”

Something? Something like what? He and Mama had sat down over the student handbook and Code of Conduct, puzzling out the ramifications of what had happened. He was going to be expelled, no matter the circumstances, so what else could be done that would be helpful? “Do you mind if I’m not behind this table? It is …small.”

Superintendent Haynes mouth softened to a smile, her hand lifted and waved that he could come forward into the no-man’s-land that gulfed between the Board of Directors and the seating provided for the community.

“I was at my locker, eating a snack. It was after 10:15, because class had let out. The warning bell hadn’t rung yet. It was probably 10:18, then. There’s some boys not far down from my locker. They are part of the marching band. I have class with David Styers fourth period, for Chemistry. He and I tease that ‘C is for chemistry’, but he’s nice and helps me try to understand how to balance the chemicals. He hasn’t gotten along with Tyler since 6th grade, but I don’t know why. I think they just don’t like each other as people. Tyler has strong friends; they’re all on the track team. He’s been bullying David more and more since the first of this month. I told David to report it to the councilor, and he did. The school has done nothing. Mrs. Earnesly just told David to ‘avoid Tyler and avoid the situation’. How are you supposed to avoid someone in the halls? When they come looking for you? He was pushing David into his locker, and no one was doing anything. I think some people ran to get a teacher, but David’s nose had hit the side of the locker by then, it was bleeding. They were trying to stuff him in. If no one else was going to stop them, if they didn’t know to stop themselves, then I could. So I picked Tyler and Mark Gran up by their shirts. They aren’t too heavy for playing track.”

“Practicing track, or participating on the track team, Mr. Guildson.”

“Ah, practicing track. “ He ducked his head sheepishly a moment, and waited for her to clear her throat for him to continue, “Mark was yelling some, nothing polite. Tyler said if I didn’t mind my own business, I would be sorry. He can still kick held off the ground, but it didn’t hurt too badly. I dropped them both, since they were paying attention to me and not David. But I was wrong. Tyler stood up and threw the locker door closed on David I think it was just to make some point. He was mostly out, but it made a bad sound, and David’s hand was caught in it. There was no reason for that, except being mean. I got angry, he was just not giving up on hurting David. So I grabbed him and put him against the wall. I really just meant to knock the air out of him, to hold him still so that he couldn’t get away before the teacher got there. “

“Mr. Gatter’s report said he arrived with you holding Tyler against the wall above the lockers, Tyler was crying. “

“The lawyers that brought us papers last week said he had lots of broken bones.”

“Nine broken ribs and a punctured lung is a lot for just hitting a cement wall. And a fractured scapula.”

“The Judge Magistrate ordered me to talk with the School Nurse. She said chest bones are really easy to break, like in CPR. She said I threw him too hard, and held him too hard against the wall. She said I shouldn’t give anyone CPR. “

“That is probably sound advice, Mr. Guildson. “ She sighed, “The accounts from students in the hall support your being a defender to David Styers. Regardless, you’re a powerful young man and in gross need of learning the limits of that strength in relation to your peers. I believe the charges of unnecessary force still stand, as well as charges of Level III violations of the Code of Conduct: Disorderly Conduct, Fighting and the civilian misdemeanor of simple battery. You will be expelled from North Hills School District as of Monday, and may not apply to the district to attend until at least one year from the termination of this school year. “

He could hear his mother’s knuckles creak on her bag.

“That being the case, “Dr. Haynes shuffled the papers in front of her into a single, neat stack. “I’d still like to extend a letter of recommendation to you. It may not be much, but it could prove useful in applying to another school with this on your record. Battery charges especially act as a red letter, but explanations as to the nature of the offense, and your role as ….white knight…could be helpful. You need to realize, Mr. Guildson, your own strength and that fighting is never the answer. If you want to help in the future, I suggest just interposing yourself between the aggressor and victim, and then nothing further. Let the authorities take care of the rest. “

Björn nodded mutely, taking the cue to return to his seat. There was little more to the meeting, some papers he and mama had to sign. There was nothing else worth paying attention to until they passed out through the double doors to the municipal hallway. David was standing there, his older sister not too far off with the car keys. His poor hand was wrapped with gauze, stiffened with an air brace. “Björn…”

“Hallo, David. You’re going to need a new lab partner.”

The maimed hand moved forward, and caught his own monstrous paw, “No, It’s too close to summer to bother. But…thank you. I can’t play the trumpet for a few months, but I’ll be okay. Whatever s**t they tell you, thank you, Björn. No one else was doing a thing. “

“Maybe you can write with your other hand. I have to apply to some other school. “

Mama patted his back, “There may be a private school somewhere that will accept someone with a record. We’ll have to look. There’s a few military prep schools, maybe some correctional schools. Nothing near here, so I think we’ll have to move. “

“You still have my email, don’t you?” David looked doubtful. Björn had never used the email, even when they exchanged them at the start of the year as lab partners.

“Ja. If there’s a lab where I end up, I’ll write you. “

“Yeah…hey, really do that, okay?”

“You’ll be the only friend I’ll have at some new place. “ But if we have to move, you’ll be miles and miles away.

“I’ll write you. Get to a library or something occasionally this summer and read them. Let me know where you end up.”


Edelsteine


Edelsteine

PostPosted: Tue May 31, 2011 7:58 pm


Syrie

What about his dad? WE LOVE TO BE NOSEY. DID HE DIE? TELL US OH GOD PLEASE. No, really. I want more background on Bjorn son of Guild and I'm not the only one!


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 01, 2011 1:23 am


Syrie

When it comes to shopping for clothes/school uniforms... how does he get them adjusted? Have them tailor made, or just altered to fit/match the dress code? You mention (and we can SEE) that he is MASSIVE - it's not easy to shop for several reasons...


He gets mail catalogs (many such companies now have online sites, but he prefers to peruse the catalogs and then place orders by phone.)
Specific examples of this are:
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Site Here
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Site Here
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Big & Tall Portal


Syrie
(which leads me to my next question) how does he cope with the world not meant for someone so braw and bonny? Like, if he needs shaving cream or a pack of gum or whatever - does he suffer himself to go scaring the DC locals (I'm thinking yes) or would he ask a friend to perhaps pick up a few things for him -- or a combo? (likely).

He's not shy about interacting with other human beings at all. He likes general attention and admiration, and when it comes to the rest of life he's learned that communication is the key to getting the ball rolling. Being a performance artist, which is what the old-time demonstrations are all about, takes a lot of setting things up: negotiating contracts, handshaking, and time spent organizing with other entertainers. DJ's and announcers, mostly. It's when he's forced into blatantly too-small occasions that he feels awkward and out of place.

But in the case of most retail stores with living needs, there is an aspect of design called 'butt-touch' room. I kid you not, there's research that aisles need to be wide enough that a customer can take a few steps back in consideration/thought about products/purchases....all because if their butt touches a display table behind them it will interrupt their thought and they will be a percentage chance less likely to make their purchase. This being the case, Drug stores, department stores and grocery stores all have wide walk spaces to allow 1-2 people enough room to do this without running into each other. This means in normal stores there's enough room for Bjorn to meander about without being a bull in the china shop.

A long story made short - general life is manageable and not embarrassing. It's the 'recreational' activities where large people are rarely taken into account. As a Flaw, it's a problem because it is so frequent for nearly any and general recreation. Most Bicycles are only made for people weighing 250 lbs or less, as with most weight training equipment that isn't free weights. Any mass-seating with arms (planes, trains, automobiles) are meant for people with bodies wholly beneath the 40-45" width mark.

But the question is how he DEALS with it, and as its been mentioned, he doesn't usually bother. He'll politely bow most of the time. If someone's persistent, he'll try to explain how he doesn't fit, how it will make an inconvenient situation where the staff can't cope and managers get awkward, and how other customers will be staring at the ridiculous scene if something gets broken. If the persistent party still doesn't get it, they'd have to be a good friend for him to agree to go along, otherwise they're obviously not considerate of others and he'll try to polite excuse himself altogether from dealing with such a self-absorbed person.

Edelsteine


Akina Tokuwa

PostPosted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 3:12 pm


The first two virtues read as pretty similar. If they were combined under the same heading, I probably wouldn't notice. It seems like the first one is ACCEPTING and the second is RELIABLE, but I think this could be sharpened in revision and made a touch clearer. This is just a general note though.

The third flaw sounds too much like a virtue right now. I'd go in and focus on his fixation on people leads to alienation, or something else negative. Right now, it talks mostly about how attentive he is to people he likes cast in a positive light. When you revise, make sure it brings out the negative aspect more clearly.

His flaws are a little external right now. I'd consider adding in a really, significant core character flaw to help round him out. Being an average student who is a bit bigger than society is used to and can be a suffocating friend is a little too surface-level. What is his tragic flaw? What is that one thing about him that really brings him down and disrupts his life? Is there a reason he is so strangely fixated on becoming a massively strong boy, even at just 16? I think that is an aspect of Bjorn that is missing from the current profile.

I hope this helps!
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2011 11:28 am


well, gave it a go of trying to rewrite/revise/deepen...took long enough in trying to find what keeps the character simple (in line with Boxer from Animal Farm, and Daniel Keyes' Charlie Gordon) while trying to be flaws.

I'll put them here and see what people think? Further revision still likely needed. eek


Quote:


Virtues:
Accepting –
He’s gentle, and not generally critical of those around him. Björn figures everyone has a reason for what they’re doing, it’s a matter of whether or not it infringes on someone else’s basic freedoms. He’ll forgive others basic transgressions of dickery, preferring everyone move on without the need for drama.

Reliable –
Björn would rather be exercising or eating instead of the ego-jockeying and self-interest adventures most teens get up to. He's a simple guy with simple tastes, and because of his life goals (read: world competitions and Olympian sports) is a reliable person. He carries a day planner to write down things necessary to remember, and follows a regimen strictly for daily life(5 am - wakeup, 5:15 gym, 7:45 - showers, 8:15 homeroom....)

Prepared –
Since he’s used to keeping his own schedule, performing for people and small competitions, Björn has some spare savings at his age and a fair collection of random knowledge and objects to access at a moment’s notice. He collects practical, life knowledge. If you hang out with contractors at a dive and chat them up, you'll probably learn how to best change oil on a car, how to best paint a house interior, and how using a five gallon bucket of boiling water will clear a clogged toilet. He likes simple reading like magazines and almanacs, from which he's learned the proper way to set a table (Martha Stewart Living), or how to choose a barber (GQ magazine, Hint: Trust a man with scissors, not clippers). Magazines and short news clips, conversations with people at a burger joint...these are all things that don't take a lot of time or heavy focus to engage in. Like schoolwork, half-an-hour or less!

Between his duffel and his messenger bag, if you need money or something useful, or someone to do it, he’s a good guy to ask. Nail clippers? Done. A lighter? Done.

Flaws:
Dumb
He’s not the brightest bulb in the pack. He doesn’t assign effort towards schoolwork. A solid C student, he’s attentive in class but won’t do assignments that take any longer than a half hour. He believes in worldly, practical knowledge for himself. He appreciates those with wits and high learning, but he isn’t going to be convinced he should be joining their ranks. Other than powerlifting and strongman competitions, Björn aims to become a tradesman of some sort, like a carpenter or steelworker.

And Knows It
Bjorn ‘s mother and his family have never sugar-coated anything. He knows that he isn’t the smartest cookie. To try to make up for it, he tries never to make impulsive decisions and always looks to find second, or even third opinions. Or fourth…seventh… This isn’t just indecisiveness, Bjorn does *not* trust his own judgment. He’s either painfully slow about decisions, or he’ll defer to someone he has come to respect. Defending friends and family are the only exception to this, as response in ‘war’ has to be immediate. He’ll just expect that he’s going to have made a mistake somewhere in it and have to pay for it.

Obeisance
It’s medieval, but it works for him. It probably won’t work for others. When meeting and interacting with others, Bjorn actively makes assumptions based on ability and intelligence, and assigns people places in the kingdom in his head. Once a person has caste, it is hard to fall from grace or rise from mud. He thinks of himself as a warhorse or a sword, not even person, everyone else gets to be the knights, nobility, and peasantry. He will take orders from a noble if he has come to think of them as a friend and as his own lord or lady. As long as they take steps to never appear blackly evil, he won’t question it and will serve faithfully, as their judgment is better than his. It is not the horse or sword that chooses how it is best wielded.
Insofar as life in this state, he isn't innovative (and won't), he doesn't take the initiative to do more then is explicitly given in directions, and there is no 'give 110%'. He isn't smart enough and he expects he'd just mess something up.



Edelsteine


Akina Tokuwa

PostPosted: Thu Jun 23, 2011 10:10 am


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