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Free climbing – Does he do this in one of those ‘recreational centres’ where they have padding and stuffs incase you ever fall? Or does he go out into the wild surrounds of Destiny City to find surfaces for climbing?

Also, has he ever fallen? surprised

Those questions are more for interest sake rather than things you might need to add into your form, other than that I can’t pick at anything else on for Valerius.

found fathers and mothers
Should be founding fathers and mothers?

I can’t seem to find anything wrong with Glaucus either.

Your detail is astonishing and commendable!

You say that Val finds it easy to ignore rumors about him as though it happens often because he is weird, but he doesn't really strike me as all that weird, to be completely honest, lol. The only thing I could see people talking about is his habit of hoarding things.

Other than that, I think he looks good! And even that's not all that major biggrin

Return Crit for my Senshi?

Okay, I’ll start with Val and work from there. Apparently, I’m going very, very in depth here!

Overall, I don’t really get a good picture of this guy. I don’t feel like this is someone I could know, especially because a few of his traits feel kind of random. Characters (and people) don’t tend to sprout random traits, so you want to watch out for that.

As far as his virtues go, Resourceful is all well and good, but it doesn’t feel like a defined trait. You definitely have the resourceful bit in there, but I also see determined, creativity and critical. You have a bunch of virtues all packed into one, so perhaps you want to trim it down a little. As it stands, I find myself wondering if he’s a park ranger or something, because for a eighteen-year-old boy, he seems to know an awful lot and have his s**t together. Was he a boy scout? Was his mother a nurse? Where did he get all this knowledge, and way does he feel so inclined to have it if it’s considered ‘useless’?

Self-confidence seems alright, for the most part. The only part that bothered me was the end, where you added on that bit about the ability to make other characters feel better. I’d just be careful making a blanket statement like that, because in RP, you can’t just make characters feel more confident, it’s really up to the other player. XD You can change the wording to imply as such, or cut it out completely, because I think it’s a decent value without that bit added in. (Same thing with Enduring, it also ends with the same sort of blanket statement.)

Now, Generous on its own is a fine virtue, but it seems randomly thrown together to me. I don’t get the bit about his laptop and video games, and the homework, for that matter. Why not? If he’s so generous and able to help people with their problems, why does he let those less intelligent than him suffer? (If that’s not what you meant, it sounds a little harsh, heh.) However, the biggest problem I have with generosity is the fact that he’s a klepto. If he feels the need to take things that aren’t his and hoard them, why on earth is he giving things away? To be honest, I’m not even sure if that’s really kelptomania, if he’s just hoarding and not stealing, so you want to make sure you define it to be whatever it was you want. Either way, I can’t see that sort of flaw lending itself to generosity, at least they way they're written. They clash. Would it drive him crazy to give away things if he’s been hoarding them?

If you’re worried about have four virtues, you certainly have some from Resourceful you could make virtues all of their own (creative, observant, determined).

I like his flaws of Blunt and Assertive, however, I’m finding Gullible to be clashing with what you’ve written down in his virtues. So far, you’ve portrayed him as one smart cookie. This seems completely random. It doesn’t fit in with the rest of his character. You’ve mentioned that he can tell when people take advantage of his generosity, but how can he tell if he’s so gullible he’ll walk into the girls’ bathroom? If he’s so stubborn about doing things his way, why does he trust other people so easily? You've weakened the flaw by adding in the good memory, but I’m not sure you want to (or meant to) do that. It’s okay for him to have weaknesses, it will make him feel more real! :] I think what you need to do is decide in what direction you want to go, gullible or not, so you can decide in which direction you’d like to proceed.

Hobbies, I’m doing these now so I can see how they reflect his personality. While I can see free-solo climbing (boy, what a hobby!), I’m sort of confused by Scrabble. This is the only mention of word love I could find in his profile. None of his traits have anything to do with words, so I just find it a bit odd and, my choice word of the day, random. I like how melon carving incorporates a little taste of his history! That’s the sort of thing that makes a character feel real. It makes me want to know more about him, what happened in the kitchen, which is really good. Leaving me asking for more, haha. (Like a little appetizer!)

I love his hairstyle, omg. <3

SO all this being said, I definitely do not think you have a bad character. I feel like you tried to go in two different directions at once and ended up with a little of both instead of one complete character. You have some good flaws and virtues, but they don’t seem to be one cohesive unit. I might suggest writing up a history for this fellow, that’s my personal method for putting together traits that seems to fit together.

Now! On to Glaucus!

I understand three out of four of his virtues. However, I fail to see where gentle fits in. I can’t actually tell what you’re trying to describe. We go from gentle to serious, which are definitely two very different traits. You express his patience and honor, as well as some others. You’re trying to stuff a lot of things into one trait, and I’m not sure if gentle is the one you’re looking for. Perhaps if you changed it to chivalrous, the combination would make more sense? You certainly express his chivalry a lot, perhaps it’d be more suited to his overall personality.

On the note of chivalry, you mention a lot of the Cavaliers meaning chivalry and so on, and so forth. While you mention this is Glaucus’ own brand of Cavalier, I suggest you consider how Hector feels about that kind of thing. Wouldn’t that be a bit like mutiny, especially with such stubborn-ness? Just some food for thought.

As far as flaws go, I’m under the impression physical flaws generally aren’t accepted as flaws. (On a side note, some find the lack of color useful when it comes to seeing motion. I do not believe colorblindness actually impairs sight.) However, you can cut that out and still have a fine flaw, if you decide to.

However, I’m a bit concerned with flaws and virtues clashing again. You explain his disillusionment leads to bouts of despondence, but doesn’t this conflict with his undaunted virtue? If failure doesn’t bother him, why does the failure of his ideas? Why doesn’t he stubbornly try to persevere or make it work? Especially if his next flaw is single-minded, and he believes he can do anything he can set his mind to? I find it very odd he’d abandon things when his ideals fail if you’ve written him to be so solid and confident that he’s never shaken.

I’m not sure about sensitve, either. The way it’s written, it doesn’t sound that detrimental to him or to others. If he alters to make them happy, they are happy and he’s avoiding conflict. If he’s susceptible to being used, go ahead and let him be. It feels like this flaw is very guarded, which makes it hard to see it as an actual flaw. It has a lot of potential, and I think I know what you're going for, so maybe it just needs to be reworded a little? :]

Now, for his hobbies. I feel like they’re falling into that random trap again. Reading his personality, I didn’t get an ‘immature’ side of him at all, so I can’t see how the bagpipe fits in at all. I’m also not sure if it’s even a hobby if he’s not allowed to play anymore? I also have a very difficult time seeing this guy break the law, where you’ve portrayed him as so chivalrous. If he sees everyone as black or white, right or wrong, how does he justify breaking the law himself? If he’s meant to be a role-model and an upstanding citizen, how does it work? I’m not sure how breaking the law is any better than womanizing or smoking or drinking, to be honest. It’s equally as undesirable in a gentleman, I’d believe.

You mention his rebellion, but actually, I find his rebellion being the gentleman, since this is not how Hector seems to want to run his Cavaliers (judging on what’s written in his journal). Glaucus is the rebel simply by being who he is, so tagging and bombing is sort of like…fitting in with the rest of the unruly mob, if that makes sense. I’m trying really hard to see how it makes sense with the rest of his character, but…I just am having a very hard time understanding why such a noble guy would go out and destroy public property.

Finally, I really like Ares as a hobby, haha. Now, I really see how this one fits into his personality! It’s very cute, and I’d love to see what Ares thought of being someone’s hobby.

All that said, I feel like I get a much clearer image of who Glaucus is. Your traits are much more cohesive, despite some confliction, and I think I understand who he’s supposed to be. My final bit is on the ‘why me’ bit.

Remember, you’re basically trying to sell yourself. It’s like a resume, haha! Why would Dylan/Alexandros want Val to host one of his cavaliers?

That aside, I’m not sure polar opposites is a wise choice. Think about putting two very different people in the same head. That could very easily lead someone to going crazy. While I’m not implying these guys need to be the same people, they do need to share some qualities so their personalities can mesh, I think, because they are going to be the same person eventually, right? You don’t want to end up with a third person at the very end. I think it’s a good idea to balance out one flaw on either side, but I don’t think changing who they are completely is a good idea, either. I think you just want to keep in mind how much the character would actually change it you take away all their flaws and just leave them with a pile of virtues, because that is sort of what it feels like, with the exception of one flaw.

All in all? I think you’ve got a great start, you’ve obviously thought about this a whole lot and gone out of your way to give him some very unique aspects! I love it when you add little tidbits about their lives, it makes them seem really realistic. I like the idea of Glaucus as a little bit of a rebel from the rest of the cavaliers, I think that’s pretty cute. (Also, I love his prospective relationship with Ares.)

If you want to talk about it or something, I’m happy to clarify anything I’ve said if it seems unclear. I hope this helps! Good luck with your quest! :]