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 Posted: Thu Dec 01, 2005 8:58 pm
Dark_Lady_Jade I'd go back to 7th and 8th grade (I went to a different school for each grade) and stop everyone from making my life miserable. I don't want to go into details, but I'll just say that I was treated horribly by almost all the students in both schools I went to. I'd have been more outspoken, and I probably would have punched a few more people in 7th grade. In 8th grade, I'd go back and definitely crack some heads. No one would bother me or treat me like dirt and maybe then I wouldn't be so messed up in the head. Even today, I get ticked off just thinking about everything and how crappy I ended up being. I mentally kick myself everyday for not beating all those punks when I had the chance.
Ah... Middle School... mother ******** bitches made my life hell. smile It's funny, they'd hurt my feelings everyday, cause I let them. They threw rocks at me [10 points if you can hit her in the head], called me white [how original], ran by and punched me in the stomach because I was with the boy one of them wanted....
I just didn't fit in. There were tables of 4 and tables of 6 in the cafeteria. I was "friends" with 4 girls... or so I thought. They would sit at a 4 person table purposly, so I couldn't sit with them... So I always sat at the table next to them by myself.
Sitting with the black girls? Pssssh! Out of the question.
The "popular" girls liked me, but they were to fake, and I was to honest and real for them... and their boyfriends didn't like me... oh woe.
My other "friends" had different lunches... I was a sad girl in middle school. 3nodding
I think it reflects on how 'mean' and 'violent' I am now. I don't take anyones s**t.
But the thing about middle school that effected me the most was the ability to appreciate friends... Since I never really had them in middle school, I was able to grasp on to a few really special people.
For a negative turn... middle school ******** me up. I started hiding my emotions. I stopped crying. It was weird. When people ******** me over, I gave them more chances, and disreguarded it... maybe for the friendship thing... but just recently I pushed all those people out of my life.
So negative.. positive... negative... and ending in positive I believe.
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Posted: Sat Dec 03, 2005 6:50 am
Passion_Dragon Kaenai Passion_Dragon Kaenai
girl, i think i know that dude! lol!
seriously, i wouldn't have married my ex. i probably wouldn't have spoken to him at all. he wasn't horrible or anything, we just weren't ready.
[ eek
xd
I have so many "JLB" stories in my main account's journal. (I use initials of people I know, never names.) But that would be funny if you knew him.
Are you saying that if you could do it all again, you wouldn't have married him...? I'm confused. xp ] that's exactly what i mean. like i said, he wasn't a horrible person, but we weren't ready, and i know so many things would have turned out differently if we hadn't been going out, so instead of even talking to him, i would just keep going about my business. [Ah, ok. 3nodding Are you still married to him? neutral ]
yes, but mainly because neither of us could afford the court fees. we've been separated for years, though. happily, we should be drawing that chapter (epic) to a close by the summer. *crosses fingers*
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Posted: Sat Dec 03, 2005 6:53 am
Dark_Lady_Jade I'd go back to 7th and 8th grade (I went to a different school for each grade) and stop everyone from making my life miserable. I don't want to go into details, but I'll just say that I was treated horribly by almost all the students in both schools I went to. I'd have been more outspoken, and I probably would have punched a few more people in 7th grade. In 8th grade, I'd go back and definitely crack some heads. No one would bother me or treat me like dirt and maybe then I wouldn't be so messed up in the head. Even today, I get ticked off just thinking about everything and how crappy I ended up being. I mentally kick myself everyday for not beating all those punks when I had the chance.
girl, i feel ya on that. my drama started about the 2nd grade - i was 2 years younger than everyone, and that made it real easy for other kids to jump on me whenever they felt like talkin' sh** or whatever. and there really wasn't much i could do because i was so small. that went on until about 11th grade, and by then i was already all messed up, so it was pretty much too late.
to make a long story short, i still don't deal well with groups of people larger than 2 or 3, and i'm usually medicated when i do.
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Posted: Sat Dec 03, 2005 1:50 pm
Hmm, I'm not sure.
I guess I wouldnt do anything diffrently. Everything that has happened in my life happened for a reason and I wouldnt want to alter that.
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[P][I][N][K] [H][A][Z][E]
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Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 4:59 am
Pink Haze Hmm, I'm not sure.
I guess I wouldnt do anything diffrently. Everything that has happened in my life happened for a reason and I wouldnt want to alter that. [I kind of agree with that "everything happens for a reason" philosophy...but I still wish that I could, in a way, go back and do some things differently. How do I know that doing so wouldn't screw up the rest of my life, though?? I guess I don't, and that's the funny thing about "shoulda coulda woulda's." xp ]
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