|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 5:33 pm
Pffftt! Hehehe, good to know that I'm not the only one with a crazy director. There are thousands of examples, I don't know which ones to cite. Hahaha! Lets see, he threw pencils at the the mellophones who were missing notes, he hops up and down spontaneously, makes the trumpets drop in the middle of class...right in the middle! Oh! Today:
"This *thrusts one finger upward* means one note up. This *thrusts one finger downward* means one note up. Okay? Okay! Play. *Waits and then thrusts finger up* We move up a note. *He nods* Thrusts one finger up and one down. eek *He suddenly looks confused* Stop! Stop! What are you doing? *Thrusts one finger up* This means one OCTAVE up. *Thrusts one finger down* This means one OCTAVE down. So this *up and down fingers* means first note of the lower octave of the first scale. I don't like repeating myself *Glares at us scream * trumpets 3nodding blaugh He's crazy.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 7:18 pm
Heh.
I don't really know ONE thing that my director does that's funny but he always goes off on tangents during band/music class and it's really funny.
Anyone else have a director that mkaes corny jokes?
"I thought I'd get the band in shape so I ordered "Pilates of the Carribean" but when I got the score I was dissapointed that it said "Pirates."
"Scott, play out more."
"I am, sir. It says solo."
"Yeah, you're playing SO LOW that we can't hear ya!"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 8:19 pm
Well...our band director once wanted to "knock on wood" as the old adage goes, and yelled, "GIMME SOME WOOD" once to the band...and our whole low brass section went perverted and started laughing. Also, she was trying to avoid saying the word "butt", so she attempted to spell it out every time. Within 5 minutes, she had said crap, which is considerably worse than butt, and then said butt when we told her that she shouldn't say crap. Our director is a crazy nazi band director. We all want to kill her. Most of the time, anyway.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 8:48 pm
During section rehearsals, we kept doing the wrong fingering for Bb (on a sax, there's about 5 diff ways) Mr. C. kept telling us to do one particular fingering and by the second time of doing it wrong he yelled "You're either going to learn the sax by the time you get out of here or DIE!!" "NO, THE TOP TWO KEYS ARE DEATH!!!" (very odd comming from him)
He has a urm... turkey-like chin, and last year this kid kept yelliing out 'BIIIRRRDD' and making gobbling noises when the BD was talking. He never acctually said anything to him, so we don't know if it is due to hearing loss or if he was just ignoring him. He also threw random stuff at him when the bd wasn't looking.
He also makes corny jokes that arn't funny....
No one really likes him, and he is kind of old and always talks about girl's skirts too 'short'... (-whispers- he's kinda weird...)
Did I mention his name was Mr. Cummings? Nicknames galore for the gutter-thinking people.... sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jan 24, 2005 8:58 pm
My director made the mistake a few years ago of telling us to "put a little oomph into it" when we played a piece. The trombones(read: Union of Pervs) interpreted this in their own little way, and one of them put up their hands to ask "Mrs. Montgomery do YOU put a little oomph into it?"
To which she responded, "Yes. Always."
Needless to say the trombones began giggling incessantly.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 12:37 am
My band teacher is in his mid-twenties, so he hangs out with us sometimes. The night before our championship competition, the saxophone section leader threw a huge party, and the band director came. He ended up getting into a conversation with us that (inevitably) led to something sexual. There was an awkward silence, and then my band director looks at the ground and says, "You know, it's kind of dark out, so I can't see the line, but I think we just crossed it. Oh, there it is! Way back there!" ... Eh, maybe you had to be there. He's just randomly funny, though, because he's like one of us.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 12:39 am
JazzieWolf Did I mention his name was Mr. Cummings? Nicknames galore for the gutter-thinking people.... sweatdrop My percussionist friend's last name is Cummings. People call him "Cummer the Drummer". xp
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 5:26 am
*My friend empties their spit though the spit vlave, green spit comes out*
"You've gotta stop eatin' that green food!"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 12:09 pm
We were in vocal class...our bd is also the vocal teacher. This guy was doing a presentaion on the musical 'Anything Goes'.
Now, I'm a pastor's kid (yes, that is relevant to the story), and I do, of course, attend Church. My whole class knew this, as did my teacher. In the musical there's a character (I'm sorry, I can't remember her name...it was a while ago...) and she's also a pastor's kid, or something of the like. But she sings in night clubs and stuff. So, my teacher, during the middle of the presentation, (after he had introduced her character) says, "Christina, there's hope for you!" I was like"...." The class started laughing at her, and she realized what she had said, and tried to make up for it. This resulted in her digging a deeper hole for herself. It was quite funny, though.
That and she's always making fun of the guys in my section. Being the only girl, I get a little slack sweatdrop . She calls them all idiots most of the time...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 12:27 pm
Our director...he has a talent for one-liners let me tell you. gonk
"Shall we reproduce? Let's try!"
I think he was talking about our ability to play well on a consistant basis. sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 2:04 pm
We were playing "Pirates" today, and Coffman said, "It's B flat, trumpets! This *fingers B flat* is as different from this *fingers B natural* as this *holds up index finger with the back of his hand facing us* is from... well anyway..." And trailed off.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 2:09 pm
There are so many things our bd says, that it's very hard to remember...
Last marching season we were practicing on a field next to a busy road. So while S was talking to us, some idiot in a car drove past and screamed "YOU SUCK!". And so without thinking, S said over the longranger, "SO DOES YOUR MOTHER!".
In middle school he was very prone to screaming "sunk in a ditch!" as a form of cursing and whenever a kid messed up he'd call them a piece of meat. ^^
Last year the concert band (which is the lower of the two bands) was warming up on some type of chorale. Well, as usual, no one was really paying attention so they played the song in a Bb instead of a Eb. S was used to this so instead of getting really pissed off, he gave this really happy look and said in a high voice "Now boys and girls, Mr. Key Signature says that was wrong."
I'm sure I'll think of something really funny later, but for now I'm out. ^^
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 6:36 pm
Number_09 During "The Great Locomotive Chase:" Mr. B - Sam, did you pick a note? Sam: Yeah... Mr. B - What note did you pick? *Sam holds up fingerings* Mr. B - Now, did you PLAY that note? Sam: No... <_< >_> LOL We played that too...... The french horns were going to pick a note and Mr. Dunham said `okay, everyone, measure (insert measure name here)` So, we started there, and when we were playing and we all braced ourselves for the pick a note, all the horns played the exact same note! BD just kind of cut us off and sat there. He said`okay, from the top' and we all just burst out laughing
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 6:50 pm
During practice...this isn't that funny but...he got so pissed at the quints. Jones said loudly over the loudspeaker "S**T UP AND GET IN LINE!" He DID play tuba in college... ninja
But here's the funny one: Just yesterday the second row of clarinets in my concert band class kept giggling and they wouldn't shut up, especially this one girl...and I sit right in front of Jones to the side, so his anger was directed over me...he's scary when he's mad... sweatdrop gonk ...and the girl keeps backtalking to him and Jones keeps snapping his fingers going "No, *snap* nah uh,*snap*I don't think so*snap*no,*nah uh,*snap* no way!" He was seriously pissed but our entire class got a little bit of laugh out of Jones' "Oh-no-you-didn't"-style. xd xd
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 8:08 pm
when I was in 8th grade, our new band teacher Mr. Switzer, told us all of the uses for a breath mint (ie: deoderant).
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
