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SilverStarrSapphire Vice Captain
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 Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 8:44 pm
Rayan barreled into the table and fell over it... bringing the table with and crashing on top of him. He was now in a lot of pain, if the groaning didn't give it away.
Then the sounds of brulees woke him up to the fact that he was still in enemy territory! Rayan jumped to his feet and lifted the table above his head with a sudden spurge of superhuman strength (or perhaps it was the fact that the table was small and light), and threw it at Annabel.
"I am DeWok! Ewok was my father... and yours!" Rayan pointed back at Damien dramatically. "Dun dun DUN!!"
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Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 9:25 pm
Pulling herself onto her knees, Anna gasped and threw her hands into the air in astonishment. "Look! It's moving!" she breathed. "It's alive. It's alive... It's alive, it's moving, it's alive, it's alive, it's alive, it's alive, IT'S ALIVE!"
Not realizing that she had lost her only bottle of Amarone somewhere along the lines, Annabel clasped her hands over her mouth and stared at Damien with wide eyes as he spoke. "Aunt Jemimah?" she whispered fearfully--
But was cut off as a large form was suddenly launched over her head! The woman blinked a few times in shock before realizing she was under attack (again) and scrambled behind the Captain. She peered horrifically out from behind the human sheild to look at the acusing Ewok. "No!" she cried, "No! That's not true! That's impossible!"
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Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2009 7:29 pm
"Master Jemimaaaeih to you I am!" Damien yelled while throwing his arms up and he could almost feel the spotlight land on him dramatically.
"The Force!" He pointed to a chair and flicked his hand towards Rayan. To Damien's surprise nothing happened! "Noooooo!" He cried in horror, "Ewok has stolen my powers!"
"Then... The Brute Force!" Damien kicks a chair, aiming it towards Rayan.
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Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2009 9:52 pm
"Anything is possible, because I am your FATHER!" Rayan screamed as she pointed at Anna, before tossing his head back and cackling like an evil witch. But he leaned to far back and lost his balance, and he fell back onto the floor.
A cry from Damien had Rayan forgetting his own pain before scrambling to his feet, wobbling as he attempted to gain a sense of balance, before shouting "I STOLEN IT!!!"
Looking at the chair that was now sliding across the floor towards him, Rayan bent over backwards... Matrix-style, slowly with his arms flailing wildly to his side. The chair hit him in the crotch, sending him falling backwards again. A whimper escaped his mouth as he curled over to cup his groin. "Mommy..."
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SilverStarrSapphire Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Mar 12, 2009 10:52 pm
Mouth agape, Anna stared at Rayan in mute horror. "No! That can't be!" she cried in mortification as she fell to her hands and knees. "I don't want to be the product of child-rape!"
A war cry from the Captain adverted the distressed Lieutenant's attention. "Strong with the force you are, young padawan." she said in awe as the chair collided with the Ewok. "Ha!" she yelled as Rayan fell to the ground before looking up at Damien excitedly. "You've found his weakness! Quickly, while his defenses are down!"
The woman crawled feebly over to the fallen man and began to fish through his pockets. "Aha!" Annabel shouted triumphantly, waving Rayan's wallet in the air. "I've obtained his battle plans!"
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 6:49 pm
Damien gasped in horror. "Raya was raped?!" Before he could hear an answer, Anna was crawling over to her 'father'.
The man gasped when hearing Anna's claim "Noooooo~!" He crawled over also and tried to look at what was in this battle plan. Glancing at Rayan...
"Steal his armor!" the captain cried and pulled down Rayan's pants and somehow (probably using the powers of Brute Force) tugged the article of clothing from the other man's body. "We've got the goods! Retreat men! and Anna!"
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SilverStarrSapphire Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 10:14 pm
Rayan continued to lie on the floor in a daze, before he realized his 'daughter' had crawled over to him. He opened his arms to embrace her, except she reached into his pants... and pulled out his wallet. Damn.
"Nooo, not the planes!!!" he shouted, trying to sit up but falling back down again. His head hurt, his groin hurt, his hand hurt, his mouth hurt, his legs were cold... Rayan looked down and realized that his pants were gone. He was wearing a pair of bright pink boxers with a white rose on it. "Rose? Why are you sitting on me?!!"
...Rayan needed more beer.
Reaching around the floor with his hand, he finally found a bottle and brought it to his lips, gulping down the contents. Wait, this didn't taste like beer... he looked at the bottle. "Who brought the girly wine? Beer is a man's drink!!!" He threw the wine bottle at the wall.
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Posted: Thu Mar 19, 2009 11:29 pm
Annabel was as excited as a child in a candy store for no apparent reason. "Aye-aye, sir!" she obeyed with a salute before scuttling behind the nearest chair to dismantle the 'battle plans'.
She pulled out several slips of paper with addresses and promptly tossed them over her shoulder. "C'est tres droooole..." she muttered. The woman smirked as she came across something like a corny membership card. "He's a spy!" she called to Damien, waving the card around. "And he works for..." she squinted to read the name, which was quite difficult in her current state. "Vir...Vi... Viagra?"
It took Anna several long minutes to realize that the bottle that hit the wall was once her wine. "English kin-ni-git!" she shouted at Rayan while pulling her upper body onto the seat of the chair. "Wine is-is-is for refined persons like... Not you silly little englishman!"
"Besides," Anna countered, throwing an accusing finger in Rayan's direction with a challenging gleam in her eye. "What man keeps Victoria's secret in his pants, hmmm???? Unless..." The woman eye's widened as she thought the unthinkable. "Unless you're not a man!"
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