|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Thu Mar 18, 2010 7:29 pm
Others might have judged her for her lack of control and her blood lost. Others might have condemned her to a fate of solitude, hate and fear due to the danger she presented. Shyam was not of sound mind (not really) and for better or worse he saw nothing in her that would cause him to judge or think less of her.
Shew as his silver angel, and she possessed more beauty in heart and mind and body than he'd ever thought possible. He was certain and without a doubt taht it was SHE he had fallen from grace for. Surely the mare that the gods had tried ot hide form him had to be Amaya. . . . He couldn't remember exactly why and how things happened, but he knew there was on he loved more than grace and the gods will. . .
This ebony mare was it.
In reality, Shyam was mistaken. . . but right now, he knew nothing more than the silver eyed angel Amaya. She was the grace he had forfeited, the sanity he had lost, and the hope he was denied. If she wished to battle than so be it. . . .
So long as he was with her, that was all that mattered.
As Amaya warred wit hherself and let him loose, Shyam was quick to snap his newly wounded wing back to his side. Three wings was better than none at all. "Surely, dearest, you might take aim for something more sustaining?" He would have offered his leg but the mare had begun her charge. . . As she drew near the stallion leapt up, two wings flapping as he tried to get up and away.
An air battle would do better, and at least avoid her charges that could do so much damage. But instead, she pulled away and crashed in to a tree.
Oh bother! "Amaya!" Brows knitting, the stallion dropped back to the ground, attempting to get closer so he might assess any damage done. He didn't want to get TOO close lest drive her mad with blood lust. . .and yet. . . he didn't want to stay away lest she hurt herself.
Drat it all. He didn't want to hurt her and yet she was wounding herself! Not fair.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Mar 18, 2010 8:19 pm
Fury.
Every part of her at this moment was raw, blind fury. It was hard to tell herself from the beast at this particular moment, as everything within was a frenzy of chaotic feelings, emotions and instincts. One of them made her body raise its head and let out a primal cry of anger, though honestly, Amaya could not say which part of her held that control.
They felt him come near. Heard him speak, though they knew not what he said. Trying to fight back enough of her control to wrest a 'Stay away!' from her mouth only resulted in a garbled growl that held no meaning, eyes shutting tightly against the onslaught within. Amaya could feel herself slipping once again, the strength slipping through her grasp like water, felt the beast start to salivate again at the smell of his blood, closer.
'Iie.'
Another brutal cry tore from the masked mare's jaws as her back legs propelled her forward once again, this time meeting the tree headfirst, barely missing her horn as one side of her head bashed into the blunt wood.
Bang!
The sound of metal meeting wood was a harsh sound, but even less was the feeling of pain... Amaya felt nothing, at this moment, except rage and despair. There would be no death tonight, unless it was her own. Too much had been lost too soon. It was Shyam's right to live, as willing as he seemed to be to forefeit that at the moment- Amaya would not accept his sacrifice.
And so it was with this newfound resolve that her weight surged forward to crash her weight once more against the immobile tree trunk.
Bang!
Again.
Bang!
And again.
Bang!
And again.
CRACK!
One final cry split the air as a small shard of the thin, imprinted metal of the mare's mask flew from the impact, the other, mostly intact portion tumbling from her face- scratched, dented, and bloodied- to fall uselessly upon the ground at her hooves. Unsteady on her feet, she stumbled, dizzy from the impacts as her wings sought to balance her, but failed as her front knees gave before her weight.
It was a moment before she was aware of herself again, but when her eyes did come into focus, they were a glimmering sheen of silver, wet with tears that she was shamed to admit were there. Lowering her head so that the curled silver forelocks hid her scarred face, and prevented his gaze from seeking her out, Amaya did not attempt to move from her position, though a slight shaking of her shoulders might have given away that she was herself again.
"Sumimasen..." she whispered in a weak voice, unable- or rather, unwilling to lift her head to face him.
"Shyam... forgive me..."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 4:35 am
It was a rather terrible thing to watch. Though not much actually phased the stallion, he found with curiosity that he cared less to see someone like Amaya bash herself in to trees and tear herself to pieces. There was something not at all right about it and as she continued to thrash like a maniac, all he could do was stand by and witness.
He was prepared for the onslaught to continue, if need be, and was still just as ready to offer her his blood. It was obvious she needed it. It was quite apparent that she had been neglecting herself and her eating habits. . . . Strange, really, but it would be discussed presently.
For now, though, with brows knit in concern the chained stallion could only watch. Whoever won the outcome of this fight, he saw neither as a monster or demon. All he saw was facets of Amaya, one in the same. . . One just less pleasant than the other. But perhaps if that side could be assuaged early on. . . perhaps her blood lust wouldn't be so cruel.
His ragged tail swished lightly in concern as Amaya fell forward, her mask broken and her face exposed. She hid it from him, and even as she trembled, she apologized. Truly, she gave him far too much credit. Had she killed him (his ego allowed him to dismiss such a thought that it WOULD hve come to that) but had she. . . the world would have hailed her an angel as his soul was condemned to hell. There was no apologizing over him much less a gnarled wing.
Stepping forward, he approached. Leaning over, he gently nuzzled her shoulder and the base of her lowered neck, wings half-spread protectively over her lest someone or something dare interrupt.
Thankfully, for the most part, all of her thrashing and snarling had scared off any beast that might lurk by.
"Hush now. . . There is no apology necessary and I will not forgive you for there is NOTHING to forgive." He stated firmly, though not unkind. His crimson gaze lingered on her shaking form, though he refused to move away.
Not this time, thank you very much.
"Are you quite all right, angel-mine?" He asked softly, looking over her body for any wounds or bruises he (or the tree) might have caused. He nuzzled her lightly again, hoping to reassure her that all was well and nothing had changed due to the out burst. He was still there, alive and well, and she had nothing to regret.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 11:22 am
She felt him come near, nuzzling the base of her neck, felt his warm breath and heartfelt words as he told her there was nothing to forgive, as if the entire incident were not directly her fault- a pretty lie, but one she knew to be completely untrue.
Nothing to forgive..?
How could he say this? How could he so easily dismiss her fault in all this- perhaps it might have been different had she not known that this might happen, but the fault would still be there- and she had known, just selfishly chosen to ignore the possibility. His blood was on her wings, her face- oh god, it was even still in her mouth. She resisted the urge to gag, swallowing heavily instead and turning silver hues, still hidden beneath a veil of damp forelocks, towards his own eyes.
"How... can you say that?" was the trembling, disbelieving whisper that fell from her lips, a single tear dotting the ebon' fur of her exposed face, beneath her eye. She hoped that he could not see the scars that lay hidden under the shield of her silver and onyx-streaked mane- not a token of shame for their aesthetic value, but shame in what they represented, of what part of her she had meant to leave behind when she donned that mask. Never once had she removed it in the presence of another- though, it did seem fitting for Shyam to be the first to see, no matter how she scorned the idea.
His dismissal, though... truly ill-placed and misinformed.
"Do you not realize that I knew this was a possibility?" she forced out through frozen lips- as though her body itself was against the idea of revealing enough to him to withdraw his acceptance. "That... I selfishly remained with you on my own whims, knowing full well that this could be the outcome?" her voice broke here, and her gaze tore itself away from his with the weight of her own recrimination. 'Angel.' There was that word again. It was laughable, that he would dare to call her that even after her... outburst, seen the savagery that her other half possessed. The endearment both warmed and broke her heart.
"I couldn't... I couldn't leave you." She swallowed heavily again, wincing at the coppery taste of blood that still coated her tongue. "I was too weak."
He would never know how much that term haunted her now, being too weak to tear herself from his side, even to protect him; to suppress her feral instincts, to fight back against the beast when it emerged.
It didn't matter. It didn't matter, because... when all was said and done, the only way she could truly protect anyone was to stay away from them. He might not condone the idea, but... for his own safety... Amaya had resolved to leave him to his own.
No matter how that thought might have hurt.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 19, 2010 4:15 pm
His pierced ears pricked forward as he listened to the mare shivering and stunned beneath him. She was covered in blood, his blood, and a small part of him couldn't help but be pleased. That was fitting and as it should be. . . Thus far, he mused, they couldn't seem to stay apart without someone getting hurt.... But he'd give up all of it if it meant a sliver of her happiness.
Still standing beside her, allowing his nose to brush up against her every now and then, the stall gave a low chuckle, bemused. "I can't say I'm surprised you knew, considering you told me to run right before it overwhelmed you. . . Truly, dear, I think you need to explore your options when it comes to blood letting. You may be doing this to yourself, you know. . . " It wasn't chastisement, it was more of an observation as he thought out loud.
"I can also say there is nothing to forgive because it is truth," he spoke a bit more fiercely, red eyes serious with no jest or bemusement behind the expression. "I think it was good of you to stay and would be most foolish for you to leave," he added, just as firmly. Snorting lightly, he gave a shake of his head.
"If you were alone and lusted for blood, you might have been provoked by something smaller or much more innocent. Furthermore, any other creature out there might not stand half a chance against you. I can take a blood letting and beating. . . If ripping something to shreds is something you fear, than I hope for your sake you stay close. Because I would much rather face you than something you'd really guilt about eating." And that was that.
To Shyam, it was settled, there was no argument and if she didn't see his logic than she was both stubborn and foolish. And while he wouldn't think any less of her he was going to make sure that should she need to drink blood it would be his.
A part of Shyam was very pleased by the knowledge that she hadn't desired to leave. It would be less pleasant to rise in the morning and not see the shine of silver armor or mane; he hadn't found company he enjoyed this much since his fall and not wanted to eat. No one was permitted to harm her, even himself, and that was as it should be.
"If you left I'd have to follow so wouldn't it be easier to just . . . stay?"
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Mar 21, 2010 12:26 am
It was hard to comprehend his words through the thick haze of self-hatred and contempt for the beast she had become, laying eyes upon the tattered pelt she so adored. The words themselves, when their meaning finally penetrated her doubt and misgivings, were even harder to accept. The fact that he was absolving her of what she felt was well-placed blame was astonishing enough- but then he spoke that forbidden word.
'Stay.'
He had made it sound as if it were a simple statement of a solution with the most convenience, but Amaya could almost hear the undertone of imploring beneath it all. Why? Would she be fooling herself to think that perhaps, he had come to care for her as much as she for him? Why would he ask her to stay, after unveiling her darkest secret, after almost becoming a victim of her darker side's bloodlust?
He had said he would follow.
The mere words brought renewed tears to her eyes, eyelids shutting slowly as the moisture fell onto the sleek fur of her cheeks. What had she done to deserve his dedication? Even now, at her lowest, he seemed to care only for her best interests, and despite her better judgement, Amaya wanted so badly to accept. The mere thought of leaving him seemed to tear what was left of her battered heart in two, but the alternative was simply unthinkable.
Oh, she had managed to regain control of herself this time without any serious harm to him or herself, but what about the next time? And with him so unwilling to fight back, too gentle and kind to her to even contemplate causing her harm, even to defend himself... she couldn't bear the thought of causing him any further pain. He was right, though, in a way... had she attacked a child instead, she might never have been able to live with what she was... but as unethical as it seemed, the possibility of losing Shyam to the same danger was equally as terrifying.
She loved him.
The revelation was startling to her as much as it was heartbreaking. Oh no... she was never supposed to fall in love, it was too dangerous, too much of a risk- but the point of no return had already passed, so to speak. A part of her wasn't really surprised at all- he was such a creature of magnificence, despite his darkness; gentle despite the aura of strength and danger that he emanated, if only to her. Protective to the extreme, but still possessing a softness and warmth that she had yet to see in another soul. Another part of her was frightened beyond belief- there was no way he could feel the same, especially after witnessing what he had, knowing that she had a demon counterpart- and yet still, still persisted in calling her 'angel'.
Slowly, painfully, she lifted her head, allowing the soft wavy forelocks to fall away from her heavily scarred face, the deep marks a mask all their own that she longed to be able to discard as easily as her steel armor. She held her breath, face contorting into an expression of pain and longing, silver hues meeting his even as they watered again with shameful tears.
"Why?"
She needed to know, needed to understand... to make sure that he understood what he was asking of her. More than anything, she wanted a reason to remain at his side without needing to feel guilty- that it was not simply her own selfish desire to be near him that kept her from putting his safety above all else.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Mar 25, 2010 9:31 pm
Shyam was a great lover of many things. He had always had a giving heart and had always been passionate about many things both before and after his fall from grace. It was because of his great desire to find love that he had tricked Nimue in to believing she was his soul-mate; he had believed she would come to realize that they were meant to be lovers. . . and unfortunately made her miserable in the process. He had loved Nimue even more than the gods and spirits themselves. . . .
At least that's what he had believed. Though he knew they were never meant to be, that her heart belonged to another, Shyam had tried to get her affection. He'd been young then, foolish, and foolishly blinded by beauty. Upon his death the gods cast him from heaven and cursed him to a new life. . . a life of sin. Hell lapped at his heels and his memories twisted, torn and tattered; he knew not of Nimue, nor of the angel he had died for. He remembered little of those times and yet he yearned more than ever to find the angel he remembered falling for.
Unfortunately, he pegged Amaya as the one he had loved in heaven, despite it not being true. On the other paw, Amaya had always been the one. Had he but waited and let his passions and desires simmer, he might have realized that it wasn't Nimue he was slated for. . . .but the silver and ebony alicorn before him. Life surely had a funny way of working, for instead of finding peace and grace with Shyam the angel, she was fit now with Shyam the demon.
The crimson gazed angeni knew of his crimes. He knew he was a killer, a murderer, and upon his demise he would be cast in to hell. He killed for pleasure, had seduced many just to corrupt them, and devoured souls he had once walked in heaven with. He was a b*****d and completely undeserving of the unikalona before him. . . .
And yet, he knew there was something different about her, something he hadn't found in any of the soquili he'd be previously. Shyam was no fool about the ways of the world, and while originally he had thought perhaps it was merely lust that spoke to him, with time he found it was smething much more delicate and much more strong. She had saved him countless times and tolerated him despite his wretched ways. She had saved him even after he had faced near defeat after murdering mother and child. . . .
What she saw in him, he knew not, but she had yet to leave.
And that was exactly what Shyam wanted. If she left him he would seek her out and take her back, by force if necessary. When she hurt, the compassionate soul he opened only for her hurt. . . To see her broken and in tears before him, no. . . that wasn't right in the least. Angels weren't meant to cry, after all.
Lowering his head as she looked up at him, questioning why, the stallion said nothing for a moment. He leaned over, gently pressing his nose softly against her own as he stared down in to those silver pools. "Because you are my angel. . . and I will not permit you to leave. Because I refuse to share you, because I love you." It was easy to say because he meant it. While he was often a deceiver of many, for once his tongue spoke truth. . . .
Wings twitching slightly, the stallion closed his eyes and stated, "I am a cruel individual. It is both in my nature and part of my sin. . . . I am undeserving of your grace, and yet here you are. Even if you lust for blood, even if you have shadow amidst your soul. . . you are only goodness and light to me. You changed everything, Amaya-angel. . . . and I will not lose you so soon."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Mar 25, 2010 10:30 pm
Her tears didn't come in loud, gasping sobs or wracking cries- but soft, controlled gasps as her eyes finally shed the tears that she had been trying so valiantly to hold back; for much longer than just this day. Perhaps it was the presence of her mask that had helped to seal away her ability to cry- the last time she had shed tears was the night of her shame, when she had acquired her scars. Here now, with Shyam... there were no masks, no illusions, and no holding back what she truly was.
He had seen her darkest side, stood face-to-face with the ugly beast that wore her face and denied her heart, and yet... 'I love you.'
There were no words. Nothing she could possibly say would express the love and adoration that she felt for him at this moment, when he glimpsed the most vulnerable side of her and sought only to soothe her hurts, to coax her into remaining at his side. It was all she had ever wanted, ever dreamed of, and had always known she could never have. For as much as she yearned and dreamed and longed for a prince that could wake her from her nightmarish sleep, it was an impossibility- a beautiful dream, but a dream nonetheless.
But now, beneath his gentle touch and loving words... it had all come true.
"Shyam..." his name was almost a whimper through her tears, her nose seeking his face to brush her tear-damp face against his. "Shyam... I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." his name and her apologies were a soft mantra beneath the quiet gasps that were her heartfelt cries, knowing that he had already dismissed her pleads for forgiveness, but needing to express them anyway... for what he was giving her, for what he was subjecting himself to, and for the hurt that she had, and undoubtedly would still inflict upon him in due time. The demon half of her was still a part of her- one that she reluctantly conceeded that she could not ever rid herself of- and it would always pose a threat to those closest to her.
His acceptance meant more than he would ever know.
There was no way that she could leave him. For as much as it would put him in danger, she knew she could not live away from his side, knowing what she knew now. He spoke of his cruelty, his sin... but she could see nothing of the darkness he spoke of, even if she knew it was a part of him as well. Amaya knew what had happened that fateful night that she fell from the sky with him, though she was lacking some of the details, and despite her own moral center, she could not fault him for it. He was still her protector, her other half... and what kind of friend- or lover- would she be if she could not accept the entirety of him, as he had accepted her so readily?
She knew he had a good, kind, gentle heart, and that was enough.
"You say I am your angel... but you have been my guardian angel more readily than I ever could have anticipated." Swallowing her tears, and looking up at him through a veil of glimmering moisture and silver forelocks, she offered a smile, not the likes of which she had ever been able to wear since the days of her early childhood.
Years ago, Amaya had been happy among the unconditional love and devotion of her mother, and the tender affection her older brother had showered her with... but since her aniki's abandonment and the donning of her mask, happiness had become a thing of the past. A fond memory to look back upon, but nothing more.
Now, though... she felt the edges of her mouth curving upwards and curving even the corners of her eyes in a large, radiant smile, even as the tears continued to fall. "Aishiteru," she whispered, perhaps more for her own benefit than his, since he would not understand- she had simply always desired to hear her own voice say those words to another and not be rebuked for them. "I love you," she said again, this time in words he could understand, pressing her bared forehead to his in a tender gesture of affection as the whispered phrase fell from her lips again and again. "I love you... I love you..."
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Apr 07, 2010 8:56 am
Shyam wasn't entirely sure how he thought Amaya might respond. He could easily give away his love, and often did to lead mares and stallions astray. Strangely though, to Amaya these words weren't just lip-service. Oh no, this time his words were completely sincere and something he wanted to tell her. She truly was his angel, the one he fell from grace for. . .
While he understood his feelings and blossoming affections it never really occurred to him that she might feel the same. Certainly they were friends, kin in a way. He was outcast from society and she forced in to self-isolation due to her 'demon'. He was a demon, and she an angel with a taste for blood and loss of control. An odd pair, honestly, but with much in common. Strange how they came together. . . . but even the spirits had moments of mercy and kindness.
His ears pricked as Amaya responded with love of her own. It took the striped male a moment to understand her words. She . . . . felt the same? Of course the stallion tried to understand that many mares thought they loved him only to have him break their hearts; it was never love, never true or pure or beautiful. And yet, when Amaya spoke it Shyam couldn't help but feel his own heart flutter (a reminder that he actually HAD one) and his own features couldn't resist sparking in to a grin. There was no deviousness, no callousness or secret amusement. No. . . his smile, like hers, was pure and simple. A reminder of times past a moment where there were no tricks, no deception, no shadow.
Amaya could truly draw out the best in him, a sliver of his old self, of the goodness he once possessed.
She loved him. And somehow that was the most lovely song he'd ever heard. Never had someone said it back in such fondness; never had someone made it sound so wonderful. Truly, more and more, he knew that Amaya was the one. . . . "You realize you give me a new purpose. You're the one I've looked for all these years. . . . If I were to die now, if the spirits were to rip me from you side and cast me in to hell. . . I would go willingly. For a lifetime with you, no matter how short, I'll gladly suffer my sins in an eternity of hell." Yes. . . Because of her, she had lifted the burden of death. He had never been afraid to die, but now that he knew her. . . . even death had no grip on him.
For his heart would always, forever, be hers.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
