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crayons 4 the color blind Vice Captain
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 Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 10:09 pm
 Amelia snorted and laughed, although she wasn't laughing at him. Just the idea of setting her dad up with someone seamed... absurd and impossible. "Max, how in the world do you plan on us accomplishing that? I think Dad would laugh in my face then make me run laps for hours if I even suggested that to him." yeah cause her dad was training her in the family ways of the body guard. Her and Max play wrestled all the time, although to the onlooker it usually seemed they were trying to rip each other's head off as they randomly changed from one animal to another as they tried to one up each other.
She thought about it for a moment... "Who do you have in mind? I don't know of anyone that would interest dad?"
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Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 10:18 pm
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______________________________
Well apparently the plan had seduced her even if it was sort of crazy!
"It's a big world, there's bound to be a few people out there that he'd really like." Max saw the couch and immediately plopped down on it. This would require some thinking.
"First things first, what's your Dad's type? We need looks, and personality the whole shebang."
Max clicked his tongue.
"He's your dad so....does he go after, nice girls, tough girls, bimbos..., or brats with big racks...which I don't think personality is the right answer. Then we need to think of species that are off limits...number on is demon, no demon chicks."
______________________________
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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crayons 4 the color blind Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 10:25 pm
Amelia sighed and shrugged. Well obviously he had liked their mother, he had two kids with her and stayed with her for quiet a long time. If it wouldn't have been for the whole trying to kill her thing they would have stayed together too.
"Damsels in distress. Dad can't help it, he's an honor type guy. And she would have to be essentially nice and not too much drama, although dad can handle a lot." yeah she knew from experience, she had put her dad literally through hell when she was a teenager. She did anything she could to make him mad, it was the original reason she dated Max, which he knew. "Hmm... can't be a demon... well that rules out all of the vampire world if we are looking for a dame in distress." she said with a joke, female vampires were just naturally cocky.
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Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 10:36 pm
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"David, David, David, who knew he liked to play hero?" For some reason that struck Max in a, sexual sort of way. Why because Max was a boy and he knew things only boys could. If David liked to be a hero, chances are he liked to be "the man" in bed..and Max was thinking about this in purely heterosexual terms.
"Damn those female vampires for being so damn independent. Umm.." Max wracked is brain. " A pretty werewolf has never done the world wrong. A fairy or nymph might be a nice twist."
Max hummed.
"You know what. I don't think the species matters all that much. What we need, is someone going through a lot of s**t right now. Someone who's have relationship problems, has just been cheated on, has a terrible history with men...someone who really just hates their life right now. David's a cool headed attractive man who just so happens to have a soft spot for girls in distress....I say we look for a girl with a terrible life, or who at least isn't happy and set them up."
Max nodded his head in self assurance.
"David wants a damsel, and we'll get him a girl that needs a hero."
______________________________
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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crayons 4 the color blind Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 10:42 pm
Amelia nodded, although she would prefer her dad with a female, she would secretly be looking for guys as well. Although Max didn't know about her fathers bisexualness.
It wasn't that she had anything against gays, it was just weird having two... guys... like... a guy dating her dad was just weird!!
"Now to find a girl like that." she said with a shrug then added "An immortal, like that."
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Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 10:59 pm
rex rgis inter bestia
a king among the beasts ╔══════════════════════════════════╗
X"How is he?"
"This is not good. He's been through at least twelve cartons of Rocky Road ice cream and Danny's been on four Starbucks runs."
"Oh man."
"No, it's worse. He's been watching Toddlers in Tiaras for like..I don't even know how long and the s**t he's saying is ridiculous."
"What should we do?"
"What can we do? The guy's hit rock bottom all of a sudden."
"Stupid vampires, ******** with boss!"
"Calm down Davide, everyone knows vampires aren't very smart, we can't blame them for their stupidity."
Though the culmination of gossiping werewolves was exciting, the real action was circling the versipellis watching Kathy Griffen in the giant living room.
"KATHY! I know the gays are supposed to like you but, you're just not funny." Raffaele shoved a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth...then started to cry, again.
"Why aren't you funny Kathy? Wh-whhhaaaayyyyyyyyyyy!?" That then turned into, "Why doesn't he love me? I just wanna-be flomerenddddddddd!" Ice cream blocked the clarity of the wail.
"Forget it Raff, move on. The guy's an a*****e."
Raffaele looked over at the werewolf trying to hello. The versipellis' lip quivered. "But I should apologize for calling Veronica a b***h. He loves her! And if anyone called Hunter a b***h in front of me it'd make me feel sa---aaaaaaaaaaaadddddddah!!!!!!!!!!"
"How much wine have you had?"
"Just some more."
"This had got to stop. You can do better."
"But I don't want better!.....Whahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!" There was no soothing the pain or the emotional trauma it seemed.
The werewolves left the room a minute later and Raffaele was once again left to his own devices.
He wanted, no needed, really gay music. Lady Gaga was gay but she just wasn't going to cut it today. He needed ultra gay music, music that would make homophobes cry!
So that they could feel Raffaele's pain.......
He moved over to the ihome on the table across from him, crying the whole journey and clicked the song on the itouch.
Oh, and it was gay.
"Where have all the good men gone and where are all the gods ?"
"Oh Bonnie, I feel you, more than you knoooooowww-ho hooooo!"
And so, the crying versipellis, sang along.
"Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed!" With that Raffaele collapsed onto the couch.
"Late at night I toss and I turn and I dream of what I need---ahhhhaha! I need a hero!"
This was just not a good day. Now that all the werewolves were crowding in the doorway to watch their master, it had just gotten worse.
"I'm holding out for at hero 'till the end of the night. He's gotta be strong and he's gotta be fast and he's got to be larger than life.....larger than life!"
Raffaele sobbed for a few seconds before whining to disco sensation Bonnie Taylor.
"Bonnnniiiiiiieeeeee! Where's my hero Bonnie!? I need a hero...and more wine! Davide, more wine!"
╚══════════════════════════════════╝He's my evil shadow dove
My black Palamito
Can't break him like a diamond skull
I can't seem to do so
Can't just rob him out like the
Mob used to do so
Like memories of porno and tear stains
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2010 11:10 pm
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"Yeah..." Max took the time to think. "You check your friends...and I'll check mine. I mean, there's gotta be someone going through a rough patch right now...and if we don't know someone we'll have to go on the internet and sniff them out or something."
Alright plan!
______________________________
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 9:21 pm
Amelia tilted her head to the side, thinking. Most of her friends were demons, and much too young for her father... like... the equivalent of 18-20, where her dad was like... the equivalent of... well he was really old compared to everyone. Like... he didn't even know how old he was but he could remember s**t from waaaayyyy back in time...
But what was secretly going through her mind was Raffaele's predicament. It was almost too perfect and she knew her dad must have at least noticed the man, especially with the rough time he was having. Raffaele was prime pickings for David. "You know... I think dad may have beat us to it.." she said with a grin and looked at Max.
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crayons 4 the color blind Vice Captain
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 9:25 pm
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Well Max hadn't expected that one.
"Wait, David, has been talking to a girl?" He sounded shocked. David didn't talk to girls! Well he did, but not those sort of girls, the ones he was sexually interested in!
"Who?" Max asked quickly very interested all of a sudden.
______________________________
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 9:32 pm
Amelia shrugged looking at him teasingly. Would she tell? Maybe. But she always loved to play these games with Max. "Just a person, he met them recently actually. He hasn't been talking much though, too much going on."
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crayons 4 the color blind Vice Captain
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 9:38 pm
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Fine, she wanted to play games, Max could play games too.
"Oh, okay, fine." He crossed his arms and leaned back into the couch the picture of relaxation.
"But, just so you know, if I don't get a name, we're not having sex for at least three weeks....I probably won't even go down on you...and I won't make that baby kitten purring noise I make when you scratch behind my ears....And don't lie, we both know you love that kitten noise."
______________________________
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 10:03 pm
Amelia pouted, the perfect picture of an upset girlfriend. But of course they both knew neither would give up that easily nor had any of their games ever ended after just one round. Besides, this was almost a form of foreplay in itself. "But Max, I don't even know if he said his name." she said in a worried voice although her eyes betrayed her mischief. "My memory seems to be a bit fuzzy." she said, placing a finger on her chin in mock concentration
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crayons 4 the color blind Vice Captain
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 10:22 pm
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Wait one second.
"Excuse me...but you said, his name. You said David may not have mentioned, his, name."
Max was alert now! He leaned towards Amelia, eyes squinting as they turned a hard emerald. "Excuse me? Um, Lucy, you've got some explaining to do."
Hell yes she did! But Max knew she wouldn't give up that easy! So how to get it out of her? He'd have to bribe her...and he knew just how.
"If you let me in on this I might just be willing to role play in bed. You know I'm very against this but I know you've secretly been wanting me to put on a spiked dog collar. I also know I look very cute in a sexy santa costume as well as a naughty bunny outfit...yes I have tried on both garments. I am willing to sexually please you through these very tempting means if you tell me what the ******** is going on....and who, more importantly who David will be getting it on with."
______________________________
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 10:43 pm
Amelia's lip twitched in a smirk when Max caught her slip, then her eyebrows raised when Max told her his offer. Well, wasn't that tempting? Actually it was quiet tempting and Amelia would have taken him up on his offer right away if she knew he would have enjoyed himself as much as she would But, he really wasn't into the whole degrading costumes.... but.... She smiled and walked over to him, perching lightly on his lap and nuzzling up to his ear to speak in a whisper "How about I wear the costume and you just have to play along with my little fantasy." she offered, kind of like an in between point.
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crayons 4 the color blind Vice Captain
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Troubled Monster Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2010 10:49 pm
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"Fine, deal. Now tell me woman." He barked narrowing his eyes at her playfully.
Max wanted to know dammit! He was nosy and curious and this was sort of a big deal because figuring out David was a favorite pass time of the whole freaken world!
______________________________
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