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 Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 4:38 pm
darkphoenix1247 rofl you haven't told them yet? I think this makes me glad how accepting my parents are 3nodding sweatdrop Mind you, never done any of that, so I don't know... xd blaugh (nah, they'd support me with whatever 3nodding biggrin ) Oh, I know my parents will support me, I just don't know how to tell them about it sweatdrop ...
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Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 4:46 pm
nathan_ngl darkphoenix1247 rofl you haven't told them yet? I think this makes me glad how accepting my parents are 3nodding sweatdrop Mind you, never done any of that, so I don't know... xd blaugh (nah, they'd support me with whatever 3nodding biggrin ) Oh, I know my parents will support me, I just don't know how to tell them about it sweatdrop ... personally, i think that if one is worried about the parents' opinion, for whatever reason, then one should not get married. you know you're parents love you. no matter how sure you may be, you cannot be totally certain that your prospective spouse does, or as much. the parents know best. unless, of course, they're absolutely psychotic, in which case one won't mind not speaking with them for the rest of one's life.
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Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 4:54 pm
ZonkotheSane nathan_ngl darkphoenix1247 rofl you haven't told them yet? I think this makes me glad how accepting my parents are 3nodding sweatdrop Mind you, never done any of that, so I don't know... xd blaugh (nah, they'd support me with whatever 3nodding biggrin ) Oh, I know my parents will support me, I just don't know how to tell them about it sweatdrop ... personally, i think that if one is worried about the parents' opinion, for whatever reason, then one should not get married. you know you're parents love you. no matter how sure you may be, you cannot be totally certain that your prospective spouse does, or as much. the parents know best. unless, of course, they're absolutely psychotic, in which case one won't mind not speaking with them for the rest of one's life. Hmmm... how about if you saw it like this: My dad thinks I still need time before I'm ready to marry or date (he thinks ideally, 18 is just fine). I'm just 17, and I don't know if he really wants me to be dating now. Honestly, I know he will support me, but what will I say? "oh dad, I'm getting married next sunday evening"? sweatdrop . I just don't know how to present it, because it's like... a huge issue sweatdrop I'm just not sure, okay? It's not like I'm afraid my parents wont like her. It's just that I'm unsure about how to present the most important thing in my life to them correctly. This isn't a small thing, OKAY? crying
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Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 5:17 pm
hey, calm down-it's okay.
If I recall, dating is fine within the Torah, as it lets you know if you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody. It's not as though you are getting married now and plenty of other people have dated earlier for the wrong reasons- you are dating later for the right ones! 3nodding
Just go up to them, ask to speak with them privately, and be very blunt: say something like, "mom, dad- I'm currently dating this girl, and I really care about her. ummm...I thought you should know?" xp
Whatever you do, they'll still love you, and will support you in your decision. 3nodding
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darkphoenix1247 Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 5:24 pm
nathan_ngl ZonkotheSane nathan_ngl darkphoenix1247 rofl you haven't told them yet? I think this makes me glad how accepting my parents are 3nodding sweatdrop Mind you, never done any of that, so I don't know... xd blaugh (nah, they'd support me with whatever 3nodding biggrin ) Oh, I know my parents will support me, I just don't know how to tell them about it sweatdrop ... personally, i think that if one is worried about the parents' opinion, for whatever reason, then one should not get married. you know you're parents love you. no matter how sure you may be, you cannot be totally certain that your prospective spouse does, or as much. the parents know best. unless, of course, they're absolutely psychotic, in which case one won't mind not speaking with them for the rest of one's life. Hmmm... how about if you saw it like this: My dad thinks I still need time before I'm ready to marry or date (he thinks ideally, 18 is just fine). I'm just 17, and I don't know if he really wants me to be dating now. Honestly, I know he will support me, but what will I say? "oh dad, I'm getting married next sunday evening"? sweatdrop . I just don't know how to present it, because it's like... a huge issue sweatdrop I'm just not sure, okay? It's not like I'm afraid my parents wont like her. It's just that I'm unsure about how to present the most important thing in my life to them correctly. This isn't a small thing, OKAY? crying so it may be the person is right, but not the time. personally, i don't see the need to rush, but even so. waiting a few years won't kill you. even if you have found the one for you.
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Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 5:28 pm
darkphoenix1247 hey, calm down-it's okay.[/nobody's upset someone hurt his feelingsQuote: If I recall, dating is fine within the Torah, as it lets you know if you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody. It's not as though you are getting married now and plenty of other people have dated earlier for the wrong reasons- you are dating later for the right ones! 3nodding dating, ie, premarital relationship, isn't stressed at all. it's the marriage that gets alot of attention. and i mean alot. but before that, it's pretty much don't have sex. and a few other things, but that covers a whole lot. of course, it's all horribly more complex than just that..
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Posted: Mon Jun 12, 2006 8:32 pm
The last boy I dated was a non-practicing Jew. His mother was raised Jewish, and practiced until they moved to Arkansas. He was an okay boyfriend, but I never really had much boyfriend experience, so I always assumed boys would be boys when he'd do something stupid. Anyway, the last few months of our relationship, I stopped feeling the same about him due somewhat to the fact that he let his mother control his life. She was always hateful towards me, and I don't think she ever really liked the fact that I was trying to convert. She would always tell him I was stupid, and other such things. He would never stop her though, so he's just as bad as she is. But anywho, there aren't too many Jewish boys my age here, so I'm pretty much left with boys who are protestant and Catholic. I am okay with that, but I really want to marry a liberal Jew someday. I think that would be best.
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 1:23 am
oh, nathan, just do as i said wink you know, when we talked back then... 3nodding
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 1:46 am
tsshark oh, nathan, just do as i said wink you know, when we talked back then... 3nodding oh all the things i could say, all the things i could say rolleyes kinginsqeezels i totally agree with you people whom let their life be controled by other people or things is totally a turn off. :gasp: she said you were stupid! that is sooo not right :: gives you uber big huggle and a piece of cake:: you are so not stupid, I'm converting too. His mom sounds like this old lady that hates me ... you know what i just do with that old lady. I just think to myself "you know what when I convert and as I convert I'm going to be the most jewstatic jew ever you'll be like bleh." ... yea it sounds nice in my head. mrgreen Yea Collusion is just as bad as doing the crime. OH liberal jew ^.^ go to ohio. I heard that like a bunch of reformed (whom I would assume would be more Liberal than conservitive as the Reformed movement support alot of Liberal ideas) but yea alot live up in Cinncinatti or something. A book of mine told me. I'll see if i can backtrack myself and find out which book so I can sourse myself if I'm wrong. ninja I know you can't go to Ohio right now and all and such, but I'm just saying if you were interested in Ohio in the first place just didn't know which city.. yea.. ninja I'm just trying to help you. oooo i dated a protestant once, he was a complete a** to me. He didn't care that i wanted to be jewish but he didn't support it at all. He was evil . 4laugh well kingpinsqeezels you're awsome and stay awsome okay
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 4:54 am
nathan_ngl Hmmm... how about if you saw it like this: My dad thinks I still need time before I'm ready to marry or date (he thinks ideally, 18 is just fine). I'm just 17, and I don't know if he really wants me to be dating now. Honestly, I know he will support me, but what will I say? "oh dad, I'm getting married next sunday evening"? sweatdrop . I just don't know how to present it, because it's like... a huge issue sweatdrop I'm just not sure, okay? It's not like I'm afraid my parents wont like her. It's just that I'm unsure about how to present the most important thing in my life to them correctly. This isn't a small thing, OKAY? crying *le squish* I'm really happy for you, Nathan! If you don't mind my asking, how long have you two been seeing each other? Because if you're really that serious about it, I think she should meet your parents, and vice-versa. Zonko's right about your family's opinions. Much as we young people hate to admit it, your parents know you really well. I know that on the few occaisions where I didn't have my head stuck up my butt, my mom was right about the last boy that I dated. Not to mention that if you get along well with her family, it makes life a lot easier for you. My grampa taught me that one. My grandma didn't like him at all after their first couple of dates, but he went and made friends with her father, and the rest is history. 3nodding
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 5:22 am
DarkHalcyon I know that on the few occaisions where I didn't have my head stuck up my butt, my mom was right about the last boy that I dated.
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 6:10 am
kingpinsqeezels The last boy I dated was a non-practicing Jew. His mother was raised Jewish, and practiced until they moved to Arkansas. He was an okay boyfriend, but I never really had much boyfriend experience, so I always assumed boys would be boys when he'd do something stupid. Anyway, the last few months of our relationship, I stopped feeling the same about him due somewhat to the fact that he let his mother control his life. She was always hateful towards me, and I don't think she ever really liked the fact that I was trying to convert. She would always tell him I was stupid, and other such things. He would never stop her though, so he's just as bad as she is. But anywho, there aren't too many Jewish boys my age here, so I'm pretty much left with boys who are protestant and Catholic. I am okay with that, but I really want to marry a liberal Jew someday. I think that would be best. thats how all mothers are. In their eyes, we're still their babies, and you "girls" are just taking that away from them. You gotta learn to deal with mothers. Maybe he didnt want to yell at his mother because he loved her. But With all due respect, she insulted you and said you were bad and such, and then you ended up running from the fight, and breakign with him. The fight was between you and his mother, your guys relationship shouldnt have been affected by it unless you wanted it to be.
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 8:29 am
Akhilles kingpinsqeezels The last boy I dated was a non-practicing Jew. His mother was raised Jewish, and practiced until they moved to Arkansas. He was an okay boyfriend, but I never really had much boyfriend experience, so I always assumed boys would be boys when he'd do something stupid. Anyway, the last few months of our relationship, I stopped feeling the same about him due somewhat to the fact that he let his mother control his life. She was always hateful towards me, and I don't think she ever really liked the fact that I was trying to convert. She would always tell him I was stupid, and other such things. He would never stop her though, so he's just as bad as she is. But anywho, there aren't too many Jewish boys my age here, so I'm pretty much left with boys who are protestant and Catholic. I am okay with that, but I really want to marry a liberal Jew someday. I think that would be best. thats how all mothers are. In their eyes, we're still their babies, and you "girls" are just taking that away from them. You gotta learn to deal with mothers. Maybe he didnt want to yell at his mother because he loved her. But With all due respect, she insulted you and said you were bad and such, and then you ended up running from the fight, and breakign with him. The fight was between you and his mother, your guys relationship shouldnt have been affected by it unless you wanted it to be. yea but to a certain point guys can't sit aside and just let that happen. I mean if my boyfriends mom was saying i was a whore and stuff i'd expect him to be at least like, "hey you can't talk you don't know her.." then say how like it's like good to not say anything mean or something. you gotta say something.
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 9:30 am
dark- I don't think they can quite visit each other in person.... sweatdrop
Nebraska is a tad far from Israel XD
But usually, mothers do end up being somewhat right about most relationships. 3nodding
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darkphoenix1247 Vice Captain
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Posted: Tue Jun 13, 2006 9:55 am
i have one thing to say to all the ppl who say "jewish guy/girls are not for me, even though im jewish." DATE AND MARRY JEWISH! keep the religon strong ppls! guys: if you marry a nonjew your kids wont be jewish. theres no such thing as a HALF JEW! sry peeps. GIRLS: jewish guys are sweeter belive me. they know how to treat you RIGHT! ba'emet. i mean it guys. they just DO! try jewish dating sites (if your 18+) look for jewish ppl in your schools, start a Jew club, or an Isreal Awearness club, meet jewish ppl. Join NCSY, uSY, NIFTY, or whatever, (WEST COAST NCSY WHOOT WHOOT!) its fun! belive me. after high school, spend a year here in Isreal, meet ppl, hey i was planning on going stright to NJ fpor college but let my "rents convince me to come to Isreal for a year, and now im getting married! if i hadnet come here that would have never happened! ^_^ so give jews a chance yah? click me
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