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 Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2005 12:35 am
Nehru antonio_baka_guy *bounces small rocks off Nehru's hat* whee yeah i couldn't tell earlier if it rained or if my kitty went potty and it ran off my hat gonk
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2005 5:16 am
I saw it on tv Akilla. It was amazing. I'm glad you got to see it.
The Celtics I hear made the playoffs. That is a feat in and of itself.
Oh Akilla are you going to Anime Boston? I'll be there all three days so help me. Lucky me I get my daughter, my sis, and two of her friends to take with me. But I will have fun and meet lots of people.
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2005 4:27 pm
My friend might be pregnant, but she wants to wait until next month to use the test she's going to be getting on Saturday, to see if her period is going to come. She mentioned that she'd been spotting, which is why she really suspects pregnancy. Should she be taking the test sooner? I told her that she probably should, but was that good advice? (Not that she ever really heeds it. blaugh )
Also, is there anything else she should be doing right now? Before the time passes?
_______________________________
(Now entering the bad side of it)
She's trying to miscarry the baby. She refuses to get an abortion, because she feels that it is murder, but she just doesn't seem to grasp that what she's trying to do is the same thing. She wants to get rid of it out of fear of her parents and of her church. Mostly the priest, she says.
I told her that she should probably get the telling her parents part over with (because they're not near as bad as she makes them sound) especially because on Monday she outright lied to her mom about not being a virgin. If she waits any longer, their anger will just be worse.
I know you all will have good advice like you always do, and I'm going to print out the posts and give them to her tomorrow.
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2005 4:53 pm
She needs to wait on the pregnancy test, especially if she is young and doesn't come by cash easily and has like ONE.
Regardless of what First Response claims the best time to test is AFTER your missed period.
Now about the trying to miscarry thing. Does she realize just how HARD it is to do that. Sure some women slip in the kitchen and Miscarry but there are FAR FAR FAAAAAAARRRR more women who lug TVs and older children and groceries around. Women who kickbox and horse back ride and ALL that stuff and never ever so much as NEARLY INDICATE a miscarriage (I'm not recommending any pregnant woman be all reckless but I'm just saying). Actually INDUCING a miscarriage is difficult.
Furthermore if she doesn't believe in abortion she's just going to harm herself and the baby she's gonna probably end up having anyway in the end through all this trying to force a miscarriage bull crap.
It's not medically sound and it's not emotionally sound. It seems to me that her personal values are a bit messed up, though I myself am pro-choice, I don't know many against abortion that would think self induced miscarriage (ahem...abortion) is fine and dandy.
She really needs to see a counselor or maybe even a religious counselor outside her church. I recommend the methodist church, they are generally very very accepting and open to people in general.
And finally, you're right. Her parents they're just going to be more mad at her when they realize she's lying. I mean she's already kneck deep there's not much more they can do to her to make it any worse. Because it's already going to happen, they're gonna find out if she eventually is pregnant, and if not they'll probably find out that she isn't a virgin anyway and then they're not only going to be disappointed they're going to be betrayed and angry.
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2005 10:24 pm
Maybe you should explain to her that even if she did miscarry - she would still need medical attention. Her parents would still find out and she would still have to deal with that.
Your friend sounds like she is scared and in denial. The best advice I can give is to strongly encourage her to go and talk to someone, perhaps within a church group as Nopen suggested, or to a free counsellor at your health center or youth group. These services are protected by the privacy act, they are free- she shouldn't even have to leave her name. She can't ignore this potential pregnancy- or hold out a terrible hope for a miscarriage - for very long. Sooner or later she will need to decide what to do and the sooner she does the sooner she can seek support and help. I hope it all turns out for the best, but please tell her that a spontaneous miscarriage is a dreadful experience not to be wished on anyone.
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Posted: Thu Apr 14, 2005 11:14 pm
Another thing to add here, is that miscarriage is very painful at times...I have also been through that...I was very sick for months...she needs to be aware that miscarriage is not good for you physically, and emotionally...
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 5:26 am
Now another one of my friends thinks she might be pregnant. The Sunday before last, she had unprotected sex during her period. For the past week or so, she's been eating an enormous amount of candy, something that is uncharacteristic of her dieting habits. She thinks it's some sort of pregnancy craving. And she's going to get a test this weekend.
Do you all think she is?
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 5:46 am
The chances of getting pregnant while having your period is extremely rare, so I don't think so. I think she is stressing herself into craving candy.
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 6:52 am
When my boss had a miscarriage she had to have a C-section. I'm not sure exactly why, but it was very traumatizing for her. Your friend really shouldn't try for that. It can lead to problems down the road. She's having a heck of a time trying to have a baby now. It's not that she didn't want the first one. It's just she's having a hard time conceiving again.
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 1:01 pm
Burnt Glitter When my boss had a miscarriage she had to have a C-section. I'm not sure exactly why, but it was very traumatizing for her. Your friend really shouldn't try for that. It can lead to problems down the road. She's having a heck of a time trying to have a baby now. It's not that she didn't want the first one. It's just she's having a hard time conceiving again. Yeah, I told her that what she's trying to do can have that effect. Though she does want children in the future, being unable to conceive when she actually wants to didn't seem to phase her when I mentioned it because all she cares about is not being pregnant now. On the bright side: After I showed her the three posts that were up this morning, she is worrying a bit more about the safety of the baby. She's (thankfully) given up the notion of trying to purposefully miscarry it. She was even wondering if having her horseback riding lesson this afternoon was safe. I'm glad everyone's advice talked some sense into her! Oh, and she said she might stop by the GPG this evening! heart (Note: Since the two friends will probably be mentioned until they find out whether they're pregnant or not, I feel I should give their names to avoid confusion. Or... any names, at least. And in respect of their privacy, I will make two up: let's call the first Violet and the second Fiona. [I am such a Snicket fan])
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 2:23 pm
Well I hope your friends are alright (and I continued horse riding until I was 5 months pregnant!! - admittedly I also fell off once, which shook me up a bit, but all was fine!)
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 2:57 pm
Freaskrus I saw it on tv Akilla. It was amazing. I'm glad you got to see it. The Celtics I hear made the playoffs. That is a feat in and of itself. Oh Akilla are you going to Anime Boston? I'll be there all three days so help me. Lucky me I get my daughter, my sis, and two of her friends to take with me. But I will have fun and meet lots of people. Yup the Celtics clinched a playoff spot, good for them.. since Antoine came back to Boston things have looked up. I don't know if I'll go to Anime Boston, a couple of my friends are really into Anime so they're bugging me about comming along. Maybe I'll consider it because Gaia will be there I think.
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 5:33 pm
Well, every time I hear from a girl or see a thread about "Am I pregnant?" There's really nothing that we can do. We could give "Oh that sounds like she's pregnant" or "Actually a lot of the common first trimester pregnancy signs can be attributed to almost anything."
Over the counter pregnancy test. Only way to know, only way to get peace of mind. Either purchase a couple or go to the local planned parenthood. And WAIT till AFTER the period is supposed to have started.
Horseriding is often strongly advised against on most of the baby sites I've been to. The chance of falling being the biggest risk.
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 5:36 pm
Hey y'all.... This Léa... or as LadyElla64 called me, "Violet." I am extremly grateful for your help... but i do have extra questions. I am a disciplined equestrian. Equitation is not a hobby for me, it's a sport and pretty much my life, moods, and whatnots revolve around it. So, IF I am pregnant, when should I stop riding? Will trotting, jumping, or cross country harm him/her? I did have a rough riding session today because I'm getting ready for a show on Sunday and I was mainly on the cross country course. I diddn't fall or anything, but there was a lot of trotting and jouncing about. It might seem like a tiny fear for the rest of you, but like I said, horses are pretty much my life, and if anything, IF I am pregnant, it'll be the hugest I might have to give up. And i need to when, why, and, most importantly, how long I'll be out of the saddle. There are also other questions I have, but I can't seem to remember them at the moment.
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Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 8:07 pm
Well, you really have to weigh it. Which is more important? Do you want to take the risks? Taken from various pregnancy sites. True, you'll always hear of stories of where women have done [insert random activity here] and the baby turned out fine. Sometimes we don't know about it. But I wouldn't recommend it. Most places won't even take you riding, or let you ride (I don't know how it works for you or whatever) if you are pregnant. Even professionals and experts have accidents. Quote: Horseback Riding: Riding a horse involves a lot of jolts and quick movements, which can really hurt you and your baby. There is also a risk of falling, which you want to avoid. Horseback riding will be something you can enjoy after your baby is born.Quote: Downhill skiing, water skiing, horseback riding: All of these activities put you at risk of falling with significant impact, which could injure you or your baby. While they may be fine early in pregnancy, talk to your doctor before doing any of these sports in your second or third trimester. Cross-country skiing is less risky, especially if you're experienced. Frankly, you should worry about other things than horseback riding. Also, you need to find out if you are pregnant before stressing yourself out. I had to give up some things being pregnant and I would do it again in a heartbeat.
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