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Set #1 for the win! >:3

Recipe:

Prep time- 1 hour
Spell Casting Time- 1 minute

Servings- 1

Ingredients-
Toad spit
Sun dew
Miscellaneous
Hog warts
Shuppet

Directions-
First, take pinches of sun dew and add the most odorous substance you have to it. Then, mix it withershins and once it has become a smooth cream add a superfluous layer of toad spit along with hog warts. Wait 50 hours before having a Shuppet use the move Nightshade on it, turning it into a wisp. Once the wisp turns purple, recite the following incantation.

"Kukutar! Flamafar!
Oompa loompa impf!"

Spin around three times before continuing.

"Couch potato, lava lamp
Pafloovity flip~!"

Result:
And ta-da~! You wasted some of your life~! biggrin

Here's my first attempt. For it, I chose set #2.

Recipe:
First off, you will need a cauldron of at least 7-Quarts or larger in size. Pour in about a gallon of spezkaggerlating dooknickle and heat until boiling. Sprinkle a tablespoon of dehydrated fairy fart into the bubbling liquid and mix with a skeletal finger until it's florid in color. Add in a poisonous snake fang, two grams of a chopped toadstool, half a gryphon's egg that's began to sour, a cup of raw frozen dog food, and a Bear breeches leaf from Acantha's plant.

Mix the brew using a small bazzlesnout sapling, root and all. It's more effective if the tree is still screaming. You'll want to stir six times clockwise and two times counter-clockwise. Mixing this up could prove fatal so be careful.

While stirring, recite the following incantation three times:
"Mal'icka Shipoopi,
Acorteha Brimm!"

Result:
Imriel's "Necromantic Spazzlewazzle Truth Potion"™ which when poured over a corpse will bring them back from the dead temporarily to answer the questions they tried to avoid in life!

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Imriel's All-Purpose Ickies Repellent™ (Second Attempt, Set #3)

Required Equipment:
Small Cauldron
Silver Soup Spoon with Hallow Handle
Mortar and Pestle
Small Funnel
Empty Potion Bottle(s)

Ingredients:
1 Cup Crystallized Sludge
1 Part. Digested Elderberry
3 tablespoons Bat Boogies
1 Leek Stem
1 teaspoon Fairy Dust
1/2 lb. Pattalti Meat (Approx. 5 chunks)
2 grams Garlic

Recipe:
In your cauldron, pour in three cups of water and one cup of crystallized sludge and heat over a medium flame. Add in one partially digested elderberry cut out of the stomach of a small mammal. Let simmer. Crush and mix one leek stem and three tablespoons of bat boogies in your mortar and pestle. Sprinkle a teaspoon of fairy dust over the mix and let set for five minutes. During your wait, take out the silver soup spoon and remove the tip, revealing the hollowed handle. Using a small funnel, pour the mix from your mortar and pestle into the hollow end of the spoon and reseal.

Return to your cauldron. By now it should be just about ready. Pull out the small kabob with pattalti chunks and add the meat in the cauldron one at a time. Do not exceed five chunks as the flesh of the pattalti beast is quite potent. Toss in two grams of garlic.

Now you must use the soup spoon with the mix in the handle. This 'special' spoon will pull the odor out of the brew which is important if you don't want your protected area to smell of rotted zombie tongues.

While mixing with the special spoon, recite the following:

"Hodgepodge's kiss and Sebastendum's toes,
Bless this brew to end all my woes!"

Now list everything that you would like this potion to repell. Neighbors? Trolls? Goblins? Insects? Stray dogs? Gnarffles? It will even work on thread trolls, beggers and politicians that can see Russia from their house. When done, recite the incantation once more.

"Hodgepodge's kiss and Sebastendum's toes,
Bless this brew to end all my woes!"

Shake your toosh a few times and if done right, a small puff of blue smoke will flow up from the brew. That is how you know the potion is complete. Now you can pour the liquid into the potion bottles you have. Each potion will protect a one-mile radius and last for a week. There's nothing that Imriel's All-Purpose Ickies Repellent™ cannot repel!

Imriel's All-Purpose Laxative™
____ 1/2 tsp -- sun dew
____ 4 Tbs -- toad spit
____ 1 -- eye of pafloovity
____ 3 lbs -- rotten kukutar meat
____ 1/2 cup -- diluted nightshade leaves

1 Heat cauldron to 850 degrees F. In a microwavable safe bowl, mix together 3 lbs of rotten kukuta meat with 4 tbs of toad spit, and heat in microwave for 2 hours. (Microwave times may vary- See your microwave instructions for details!)
2 Whilst the kukuta meat and toad spit are heating, place a solar teaspoon in morning sunlight and wait for approx. 30 minutes for 1/2 of sun dew to develop.
3 Once the concoction is ready, mix in the 1/2 tsp of sun dew and pour into cauldron. In a separate bowl, mix together 1 eye of pafloovity (preferably still able to see), and 1/2 cup of diluted nightshade leaves. Heat in microwave for 15 minutes.
4 Empty the contents of the second bowl into the cauldron and allow the ingredients to merge together. Let the cauldron to simmer for approx. 2 days.
5 At the end of the second day, chant the following incantation to magically fuse the remaining ingredients into one:

withershins & pufflebutts
malahala doo
superfluous sassy lips
shakalaka boo
babybooty pinches & odorous gnome shoes
will o' the wisp in a pigglywiggly's stew

6 Once the incantation is said and done, the potion should be ready to cool and serve.

Recipe:
(Gather carefully and don't expose to water, pound all ingredients to dust as fine as powered fairy wings (the flour, not actual powered fairy wings. don't be cruel))

- 4 1/3 Cups of Love (As in the incense kind)
- A Scruple of Roasted Withershins
- Words of Whispering Grass
- Heart of Nightshade
- 2 Fingers of Dead Man's Fingers (The moss kind, not the human flesh kind)
- 3 Pinches of Powered Feather Stems


Incantation:
(Before incantation, be sure to have piles of fabric near, (i.e. clothes, blankets, towels...), stand over said piles and have them pre-soaked in cold well water)

Where once odorous ties be many
Where once the kukutar were a plenty
Superfluous life had become by stench of lust
Torn in twain the relationship turns to rust

Pafloovity Plu
Turn the heart that's true
Mafloovity Floo
Become rain and sun dew

Then Wisp and a flash!
All reverts back to ash!
No more toad spit and canker's rash

Now sink into arms most soft, love requited

Result:
(Not always guaranteed, be sure to hang up said fabrics and dry)

While often speculate that this is a love spell, it actually is something quite different. This spell is actually laundry detergent. Which can kind of make sense, since any blanket or article of clothing will be blessed with irresistible soft fluffiness and slight static electricity that could make anyone fall in love with 100% cotton fabric. The perfect thing to make snuggling with blankets the most soft, clean, and pleasing.
Enjoy.

Imriel's Cure for the Common Cod

Recipe: Using the stem of an odorous nightshade, stir two pinches of sun dew gathered in the first hour of dawn and a wisp of toad spit, to taste, in an off-white porcelain bowl. Turn bowl withershins and whisper this incantation:

"Pafloovity! If that kukutar thinks he can top my cod, I'll eat my hat!"

Look left and right in a suspicious fashion with a smug grin on your face before massaging cod with the concoction. Grill and serve.

Warning: Most common side effect is hat eating.

Here's my spell using Set One:

Recipe:
On the night of a full moon, go into a misty bog and, without falling into a patch of quicksand, harvest at least one cup of toad spit. Gloves are a suggested accessory, but that is, of course, the spellcaster's preference. Bring water to a boil in a half gallon cauldron placed over an open fire, then slowly add the spit one drop at a time until the liquid turns a nice neon green color. After the color changes, add one tablespoon of nightshade powder and leave the mixture to simmer for about fifteen minutes.

When you see a wisp of purple smoke rising from the cauldron, remove it immediately, or risk being drenched by a truly odorous concoction. (As a side note, most of the M-chan brand of spells have a tendency to to explode if done improperly, so please take preventative measures beforehand in case of emergencies.) Once taken from the heat, add two pinches of sugar and a dash of kukatar fur (from the tail end of the kukatar, of course). Pour into a glass phial and take with you when performing the incantation.

Incantation:
To be recited while walking withershins around the intended target. Attempting to do so, however, is perhaps the most difficult part of performing the spell as said target may (A) Run Away, (B) Hide or (C) Push you down a steep hill.

Oh pafloovity and sun dew
My heart always belongs to you
And soon, just wait and see
You will give your heart to me!
(You may insert evil cackling at this point, although it can be excluded if you feel it is superfluous.)


Result:
One Phial of M-chan's Super Infatuation Potion! Guaranteed to make your desired person fall in love with you for a whole half hour! We do not take any responsibility if said person decides to take out a restraining order on you after the time limit is up.

Recipe:
Make a Hodgepodge pot from spreading a thin amount around the inside of a pot and letting it dry, layer by layer. When done, place over 20 glow sticks and one rabid hamster (in a cage for safety precautions). If the pot begins to melt, add some chunks of potatoes into the hamster cage. You will need a bat boogie's amount of radioactive green sludge to stabalize the mixture. While the sludge simmers over the glow-stick fire, mash a handful of elderberries with sunny yellow socks that have been washed. Transfer all the fresh elderberry juice with the socks into the hodgepodge pot. Just take the sock, let it soak up the juice and then wring it out over the mixture.After that, add some leek stems but sure to hollow out the leek stems before dumping it into the mixture. Take away the glow sticks and hamster and recite the incantation. While reciting, do a silly little rain dance and spin around 7 1/2 times. The mixture should be crystallized if you've followed the correct instructions!

Incantation:
Shout it, Pattalti!
Sebastendum mistakes with Pattali!
He tastes just like Macoroni!

Result:
A year's supply of Insta-brand Insta-water

(( To re-activate the insta-water, add water over a small piece of crystal mixture. ))

My entry, sorry if there is mistakes in grammar (ish French so English sometimes is strange XD)

Recipe :
Must be done during a new moon night.
In a big cauldron make boil the leek stem in sludge during 20 minutes.
During this time, prepare the elderberries with some honey and put it in the freezer during 20 minutes too.
Take some butter, flour and eggs to make a puff pastry.
When the leek stem are ready dig a hollow in and put the cristallized hodgepodge (elderberries and honey) on.

Then chop the stem in chunks and put it in the pastry with some custard.
Put it in the fridge during one hour.

When times come before sunrise cast the spell on.

Recite the incantation :
"Bat boogies and magical cure
Sebastendum and gold in pure
pirlimpinpin and pattalti
Enchanted this pastry".

Result :
A pastry you need to eat before making some mischief, it will give you big chance of success.

Recipe -
First - get about a gallon of sour buttermilk. Enter the woods at midnight, and in the heart of it, find a raw red and white toadstool, While there you will also want to gather a juniper sapling for flavor, and a fairy fart for a florid aroma.
Return to your kitchen and in a five ounce copper pot with an alder-wood handle
Stir it clockwise and repeat the incantation.
"Acantha, Acorthea Shipoopi stew!"
Until the mixture turns a livid shade of sky blue scarlet. (You'll be sure to know it when you see it)

Successful mixture will produce
"Uncle Flatumeir's potion of preventative for pontification" - a potion to give to your mother in law next time she comes with helpful advice. Side effects may include a strong aroma of lima beans and cabbage and ear farts.

A delicious treat with spell set #3~!


Recipe:

On a crescent-moon night, peel a leek stem with your hands behind your back. (This is most important - peeling it with your hands in front of you will result in the spell misfiring, most likely turning you or someone you love into a small apple for two hours.) Take the peel and throw it over your left shoulder, then walk away.

Prepare a concoction of elderberries (75%) and candy corn (25%), mashed into a paste. Be very careful with your proportions! Place this hodgepodge in front of a cave, and, making sure that you have the peeled leek stem, wait until the bats return from their nightly hunting trip. Bats are strongly attracted to candy corn, as any true trick-or-treat enthusiast knows. Wait until the bats land in and consume the paste. Provided you have followed the recipe properly, the elderberries in the paste will make the bats woozy, enough to counter the hyperactive effect of the candy corn. You should easily be able to capture a bat or two and use the leek stem to scrape out their little noses.

With bat boogies now in hand (or on the stick, as we assume and certainly hope you prefer), you may return to your cauldron. Throw the stick and the bat boogies in, and add three cups of apple cider. (Not hard apple cider, please, or the potion may catch fire.) Add two pinches of sebastendum (a humane alternative to the traditional eye of newt, etc. - the modern witch must be eco-conscious, after all!) and then funnel in a small amount of your own breath, blown through a hollow straw. (We prefer the variety that comes with a cheeky paper umbrella. Crazy straws are not recommended.)

Allow the resulting sludge to reduce for half an hour. When chunks begin to form, dance counter-clockwise around the cauldron precisely three and four-eighths times. Yell "Hey! Hey! Hey!" twice in succession before turning your back to the concoction. Toss in a handful of crystallized pattalti (the modern witch's choice in the absence of bird spittle and cat footfall), then wait until you hear a strange belching sound.


Incantation: Once you hear the sound, do not, I repeat, DO NOT turn around. Simply close your eyes and say the incantation in a clear, firm voice: "Pardon me, good sir, but your manners are appalling! And the smell, dear gods, have you NO decency?!"

Result: Provided that you followed the steps above precisely, the resulting small sludge-golem will happily venture out on Hallowe'en and trick-or-treat with you (if you desire twice the candy) or FOR you (if you'd rather stay home and relax).

If you did not follow the steps, the little rascal will most likely toilet-paper and egg your entire neighborhood. Whoops! In the event of a misfire of this nature, might I recommend my very own "Clean-Up Golem" spell preparation? biggrin

Sir?

Where are you going, sir?

D:

Wooo~ :'3


Recipe:
Using a medium pot over high heat, mix together 3 large bat boogies and 3-5 chunks of marble cheese. (MUST be marble! No other cheese will work!) Bring to boil, then take the resulting sludge off heat and let cool for two hours. Walk around the pot at least three times while waiting and make sure to remember to say, 'OMG Ewwwwww~'.
Next, make a hodgepodge of 1 leek stem, a handful of elderberries and 2 cups milk. Make sure to recite the Monty Python elderberries joke while doing so. (You're mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries!) Add sludge and mix well.

Sprinkle with crystallized pineapple, do a little dance and say the following incantation:

Hollow, full, heavy, light.
Pray to the gods that this spell is done right.
Pattalti rem nix tridenum.
Sebastendum oriallay cionum!

Result:
1 quart 'OMG So Shineee Pala Shampoo'

Are you currently suffering from unwanted shipoopi in your outdoor toadstool or garden pond? Has the same unfortunate plague stricken other areas of your residence? Well fear not! With this simple spell that even the most inept of individuals can perform (or bribe someone to perform for them *winkwink*) you too can declog even the most stubborn of waste.

Recipe:
First, mix in about a gallon of raw sewage, the nastier the better.
(Why, pray tell, would you want to mix such an ingredient in with an already clogged area? If you must ask such a question it is obvious you are not a professional in the making :< Clearly, in this area of magic, two wrongs somehow make a right.)
With the concoction brewing, quickly toss in a nut from the acorteha tree and an entire acantha plant (make sure to get all the roots!).
This should turn everything a very sickly green. Quickly grab a sapling (prepared beforehand to have no more than 6 leaves left on it) and stir vigorously.

While dancing like an idiot GREAT WIZARD/WITCH around the infected area, chant the following incantation and then push the mighty handle of flush.

Incantation:
Ra ra shish ka ra!
Florid fluid goes a whirlin'
Boom shacka lacka, Boom shacka lacka
KADOOOOOOOSH!!!!

Result:
Imriel's Rare and Elusive Toilet Declogger
For those epic clogs that the more generic products won't touch!

BUT WAIT. THERE'S MORE!
Order your ingredients now and receive a free bottle of sour fairy farts. We promise these are -much- more effective in all your flatulance needs than any other more tame fairy product.

Set #1 Imriel's spell for summoning the perfect accent.

Great for spies!

Amuse your friends!

You will need to gather a large pot to place the ingredients in, as you place each within warm the pot with a low heat. Have a fire extinguisher on hand as in some rare instances the mixture tends to react violently.

One ounce of toad spit, must be obtained from a willing toad. How one gathers said spit is of course up to them; it is recommended that you read Quibbley's Romancing the Toad and Guide to Toad Kissing if your having trouble with gathering. Since the most common methods of gaining willing toad spit can mix the caster's spit with that of the toad's it is suggested you gather a superfluous amount if possible as one never can have too much toad spit.

You will also need three droplets dew, not just any dew but dew collected at high noon from an odorous plant. The sun makes a very special ingredient known as sun dew. Keep in mind when choosing what sort of plant to collect from that the more odorous the better.

Next add a pinch of sawdust created with sand paper that first had been run over your tongue.

The last ingredient to be added is deadly nightshade you will need five leaves that should be crushed. The intended summoner of the accent should crush them with their teeth being sure to mix in a good amount of spittle into the paste. Because of the nature of the ingredient please remember spit and not swallow.

Use a wooden spoon to stir the concoction five times withershins, it's best to do this half past the hour; which hour is not important.

Once the ingredients are mixed there will be 'paf!' sound and gravity may become distorted for up to five minutes. This side effect known as pafloovity is mostly harmless. (Note that Imriel is not liable for unfortunate side effects that may occur in 5% of cases).

After the pafloovity passes a wisp of blue will appear before the summoner, you must command it in a strong voice: "Kuktar! Salxite, verimous!"

The wisp will then shoot forward into the summoner's mouth, and for the next day they will be able to create any accent they wish with just a thought.

Use for fun or profit!