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 Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:12 pm
silver-vixen-babydoll my secrets are.... i cry myself to sleep because i feel im not pretty enough to live i eat when im unhappy to the extent i feel sick i pretend to be sick a lot because i feel that no one knows i exsist i smile a lot so my friends won't worry even though im crying inside i know my family loves me.... but sometimes i begin to doubt im very sensitive... if people start yelling i burst out in tears my dad was mean.... i wished he would die and the next day he had a heart attack that made his heart burst i bottle up my emotions so much i randomly twitch i see my life so messed up i believe in fiction more that reality i was 2 cm away from ending it all... then my baby sister cried and i dropped the knife back into the sink i wish i could be a dancer i wish my friends wouldn't say their fat around me, because im almost twice their size  That's a lot to go through D:
Sometimes it's good to bottle it in, but sometimes it's even better to let it out. Even if it was to a random stranger or a close friend. Never doubt you're not loved, and work towards becoming a dancer. Small steps towards that is helpful.
If you need a random stranger to talk to, you could always PM me
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:13 pm
Secret: at one point I attempted suicide, but for some reason it didnt work so now I have oddly shaped scars on my wrists. going over my veins... but apparently the wound wasnt deep enough because the veins just keep on going XD. (no longer suicidal FYI.)
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:15 pm
Neceo Secret: at one point I attempted suicide, but for some reason it didnt work so now I have oddly shaped scars on my wrists. going over my veins... but apparently the wound wasnt deep enough because the veins just keep on going XD. (no longer suicidal FYI.)I'm glad you no longer are. heart And you're lucky you weren't successful whee
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:22 pm
sikh-91 Neceo Secret: at one point I attempted suicide, but for some reason it didnt work so now I have oddly shaped scars on my wrists. going over my veins... but apparently the wound wasnt deep enough because the veins just keep on going XD. (no longer suicidal FYI.)I'm glad you no longer are. heart And you're lucky you weren't successful whee  meh I have bad luck when it comes to dying. >_> Seriosuly. I have two knife wounds on my left hand, a large scar on the side of my chest from a biking accident where I skidded around 15 feet and riped the right side of my body open. (funny story) me: excuse me do you have the time? man: oh wh.OH MY GOD D: me: ehh biking accident, Anyway do you have the time? man: you need to get to a hospital D: me:...so you dont have the time? man: its 3:42 pm.... me: oh good. man: why? me: oh I just blacked out from blood loss, Just needed to make sure I wasnt out for long enough to get any permanent brain damage, Thank you for your time. man:where do you live ill take you home. me: oh just lantzville. man:...isnt that around a hour walk from here? me: ehh around 45 for me. but I take shortcuts. o: man: you need medical attention im taking you to the hospital. me: nah ill live. *limps off leaving a thin trail of blood* man:......crazy kid. XD I remember that conversation so well. He was working on his fence for some reason. o: But ya I am not sure I am like that. I tend to wander around while bleeding quite alot and not really think much of it. >_> The people around me spazzing out gets annoying though its like....ok your not the one with a hole in your chest why are you freaking out? >>
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:27 pm
silver-vixen-babydoll my secrets are.... i cry myself to sleep because i feel im not pretty enough to live i eat when im unhappy to the extent i feel sick i pretend to be sick a lot because i feel that no one knows i exsist i smile a lot so my friends won't worry even though im crying inside i know my family loves me.... but sometimes i begin to doubt im very sensitive... if people start yelling i burst out in tears my dad was mean.... i wished he would die and the next day he had a heart attack that made his heart burst i bottle up my emotions so much i randomly twitch i see my life so messed up i believe in fiction more that reality i was 2 cm away from ending it all... then my baby sister cried and i dropped the knife back into the sink, i realized it wasn't worth the pain i'd put people through i'm happier now that i found a true friend i could confide in... i wish i could be a dancer i wish my friends wouldn't say their fat around me, because im almost twice their size these are all secrets i had when i was growing up.... now they don't exsist anymore... im better... it seems i had a major case of depression... sweatdrop it didn't help any i had a very low self esteem because of bullies at school who made me believe all this stuff... if they are out there and they read this... guess what? YOU FAILED! im somebody... what are you? Well..... I don't deem myself honorable enough to be alive. But, compared to most, I'm a damn saint, so it balances out in the end. I eat when I'm obnoxiously bored.... Existence.... Well, don't know how to respond to that one. My relationship with my friends are also largely based on lies. But, not of sadness, but respect. I feel that way with Tabi. @.@ I'm far too insensitive. I randomly twitch regardless. I'm more entertained by fiction then reality. In reality, people's motives are crap and their actions are possible. It's the other way around in a work of fiction. Ne'er been close to the edge..... Saaaame! Though, at the same time..... I wish I could dance, but not to the extent to make a profession out of it. No comment.... @.@ Mayhaps I could collect the heads of these people?
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:30 pm
Divine_Malevolence silver-vixen-babydoll my secrets are.... i cry myself to sleep because i feel im not pretty enough to live i eat when im unhappy to the extent i feel sick i pretend to be sick a lot because i feel that no one knows i exsist i smile a lot so my friends won't worry even though im crying inside i know my family loves me.... but sometimes i begin to doubt im very sensitive... if people start yelling i burst out in tears my dad was mean.... i wished he would die and the next day he had a heart attack that made his heart burst i bottle up my emotions so much i randomly twitch i see my life so messed up i believe in fiction more that reality i was 2 cm away from ending it all... then my baby sister cried and i dropped the knife back into the sink, i realized it wasn't worth the pain i'd put people through i'm happier now that i found a true friend i could confide in... i wish i could be a dancer i wish my friends wouldn't say their fat around me, because im almost twice their size these are all secrets i had when i was growing up.... now they don't exsist anymore... im better... it seems i had a major case of depression... sweatdrop it didn't help any i had a very low self esteem because of bullies at school who made me believe all this stuff... if they are out there and they read this... guess what? YOU FAILED! im somebody... what are you? Well..... I don't deem myself honorable enough to be alive. But, compared to most, I'm a damn saint, so it balances out in the end. I eat when I'm obnoxiously bored.... Existence.... Well, don't know how to respond to that one. My relationship with my friends are also largely based on lies. But, not of sadness, but respect. I feel that way with Tabi. @.@ I'm far too insensitive. I randomly twitch regardless. I'm more entertained by fiction then reality. In reality, people's motives are crap and their actions are possible. It's the other way around in a work of fiction. Ne'er been close to the edge..... Mayhaps I could collect the heads of these people? O_o Exchange tabi with the name of someone else and..... .... ... Are you sure we arent related? >_>
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 2:32 pm
Neceo sikh-91 Neceo Secret: at one point I attempted suicide, but for some reason it didnt work so now I have oddly shaped scars on my wrists. going over my veins... but apparently the wound wasnt deep enough because the veins just keep on going XD. (no longer suicidal FYI.)I'm glad you no longer are. heart And you're lucky you weren't successful whee meh I have bad luck when it comes to dying. >_> Seriosuly. I have two knife wounds on my left hand, a large scar on the side of my chest from a biking accident where I skidded around 15 feet and riped the right side of my body open. (funny story) me: excuse me do you have the time? man: oh wh.OH MY GOD D: me: ehh biking accident, Anyway do you have the time? man: you need to get to a hospital D: me:...so you dont have the time? man: its 3:42 pm.... me: oh good. man: why? me: oh I just blacked out from blood loss, Just needed to make sure I wasnt out for long enough to get any permanent brain damage, Thank you for your time. man:where do you live ill take you home. me: oh just lantzville. man:...isnt that around a hour walk from here? me: ehh around 45 for me. but I take shortcuts. o: man: you need medical attention im taking you to the hospital. me: nah ill live. *limps off leaving a thin trail of blood* man:......crazy kid. XD I remember that conversation so well. He was working on his fence for some reason. o: But ya I am not sure I am like that. I tend to wander around while bleeding quite alot and not really think much of it. >_> The people around me spazzing out gets annoying though its like....ok your not the one with a hole in your chest why are you freaking out? >> OUCH D: The only frequent things that happen to me is paper cuts. *though, I haven't had it yet... *touch wood!* emo I suck at opening envolopes, it's not even a joke. XD In my exam, I went to turn the paper and blood just started dripping on my exam paper, and the people who are meant to watch you so you don't cheat went to me and said, you have blood on your paper, and I was like D: Nooo... but we sorted it out :') Lmao - you crazy kid wink
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 10:01 pm
Secret: One of my (female) friends said I wouldn't be too sad if she died because I barely know her.
Which is not true, on both parts. I hope there's not something wrong with her. sweatdrop
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Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2009 11:54 pm
sikh-91 Neceo sikh-91 Neceo Secret: at one point I attempted suicide, but for some reason it didnt work so now I have oddly shaped scars on my wrists. going over my veins... but apparently the wound wasnt deep enough because the veins just keep on going XD. (no longer suicidal FYI.)I'm glad you no longer are. heart And you're lucky you weren't successful whee meh I have bad luck when it comes to dying. >_> Seriosuly. I have two knife wounds on my left hand, a large scar on the side of my chest from a biking accident where I skidded around 15 feet and riped the right side of my body open. (funny story) me: excuse me do you have the time? man: oh wh.OH MY GOD D: me: ehh biking accident, Anyway do you have the time? man: you need to get to a hospital D: me:...so you dont have the time? man: its 3:42 pm.... me: oh good. man: why? me: oh I just blacked out from blood loss, Just needed to make sure I wasnt out for long enough to get any permanent brain damage, Thank you for your time. man:where do you live ill take you home. me: oh just lantzville. man:...isnt that around a hour walk from here? me: ehh around 45 for me. but I take shortcuts. o: man: you need medical attention im taking you to the hospital. me: nah ill live. *limps off leaving a thin trail of blood* man:......crazy kid. XD I remember that conversation so well. He was working on his fence for some reason. o: But ya I am not sure I am like that. I tend to wander around while bleeding quite alot and not really think much of it. >_> The people around me spazzing out gets annoying though its like....ok your not the one with a hole in your chest why are you freaking out? >> OUCH D: The only frequent things that happen to me is paper cuts. *though, I haven't had it yet... *touch wood!* emo I suck at opening envolopes, it's not even a joke. XD In my exam, I went to turn the paper and blood just started dripping on my exam paper, and the people who are meant to watch you so you don't cheat went to me and said, you have blood on your paper, and I was like D: Nooo... but we sorted it out :') Lmao - you crazy kid wink meh it happens to much to be an event. Its like "oh my god im dying!" *lives*, "Oh my god im dying again D:" *lives*, ....."im dying again.....whats with my luck" *lives*, "oh look....im dying......mmm I wonder whats for dinner" *lives* Ive been thrown into a fire, stabbed, shot at, thrown off a cliff, got sick to the point I was vomiting everywhere, at one point was homeless and living in the streets of a crime filled area, Several biking accidents, Fell off a bridge, Gang beaten, etc. I could go on all day but I think I made my point. having a near death experience kinda loses its fun after a few times... Then you just kind of develop a "well I know what dying feels like..." thing and kind of lose a fear of death. Which results in being able to be around dead/dying people or be dying yourself and look at it casually. IN my experiences anyway. :3 Also. D: Those envelopes are evil. >>; I agree with ya there. sweatdrop
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 3:37 am
Neceo sikh-91 Neceo sikh-91 Neceo Secret: at one point I attempted suicide, but for some reason it didnt work so now I have oddly shaped scars on my wrists. going over my veins... but apparently the wound wasnt deep enough because the veins just keep on going XD. (no longer suicidal FYI.)I'm glad you no longer are. heart And you're lucky you weren't successful whee meh I have bad luck when it comes to dying. >_> Seriosuly. I have two knife wounds on my left hand, a large scar on the side of my chest from a biking accident where I skidded around 15 feet and riped the right side of my body open. (funny story) me: excuse me do you have the time? man: oh wh.OH MY GOD D: me: ehh biking accident, Anyway do you have the time? man: you need to get to a hospital D: me:...so you dont have the time? man: its 3:42 pm.... me: oh good. man: why? me: oh I just blacked out from blood loss, Just needed to make sure I wasnt out for long enough to get any permanent brain damage, Thank you for your time. man:where do you live ill take you home. me: oh just lantzville. man:...isnt that around a hour walk from here? me: ehh around 45 for me. but I take shortcuts. o: man: you need medical attention im taking you to the hospital. me: nah ill live. *limps off leaving a thin trail of blood* man:......crazy kid. XD I remember that conversation so well. He was working on his fence for some reason. o: But ya I am not sure I am like that. I tend to wander around while bleeding quite alot and not really think much of it. >_> The people around me spazzing out gets annoying though its like....ok your not the one with a hole in your chest why are you freaking out? >> OUCH D: The only frequent things that happen to me is paper cuts. *though, I haven't had it yet... *touch wood!* emo I suck at opening envolopes, it's not even a joke. XD In my exam, I went to turn the paper and blood just started dripping on my exam paper, and the people who are meant to watch you so you don't cheat went to me and said, you have blood on your paper, and I was like D: Nooo... but we sorted it out :') Lmao - you crazy kid wink meh it happens to much to be an event. Its like "oh my god im dying!" *lives*, "Oh my god im dying again D:" *lives*, ....."im dying again.....whats with my luck" *lives*, "oh look....im dying......mmm I wonder whats for dinner" *lives* Ive been thrown into a fire, stabbed, shot at, thrown off a cliff, got sick to the point I was vomiting everywhere, at one point was homeless and living in the streets of a crime filled area, Several biking accidents, Fell off a bridge, Gang beaten, etc. I could go on all day but I think I made my point. having a near death experience kinda loses its fun after a few times... Then you just kind of develop a "well I know what dying feels like..." thing and kind of lose a fear of death. Which results in being able to be around dead/dying people or be dying yourself and look at it casually. IN my experiences anyway. :3 Also. D: Those envelopes are evil. >>; I agree with ya there. sweatdrop You are one lucky person O_o And yes, envelopes = gonk
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 9:07 am
Secret: I'm not going to invite my friend over this weekend because last time she was available, her parents made her drive over (as opposed to them driving her), and I'm really not comfortable with that.
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 9:08 am
Kestin Sha Secret: I'm not going to invite my friend over this weekend because last time she was available, her parents made her drive over (as opposed to them driving her), and I'm really not comfortable with that.
(She's not the kind of person I can just say that to. Our quasi-friendship is built on superficial fun and games, not heavy seriousness.)Why not?
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 9:10 am
I'm not saying I'm opposed to her learning to drive, but I don't feel right providing her with a chance to practice on real roads with real people and real pressure. It's sort of a personal thing, I guess...maybe she's comfortable with it (sure didn't seem like that last time though), but I'm not.
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 9:10 am
Kestin Sha Secret: I'm not going to invite my friend over this weekend because last time she was available, her parents made her drive over (as opposed to them driving her), and I'm really not comfortable with that.Is she a bad driver? O_o
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Posted: Sat Oct 24, 2009 9:12 am
sikh-91 Kestin Sha Secret: I'm not going to invite my friend over this weekend because last time she was available, her parents made her drive over (as opposed to them driving her), and I'm really not comfortable with that.Is she a bad driver? O_o I wouldn't know, but see my above post.
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