Welcome to Gaia! ::

Well, if you love God, you will want to give up your sinful lifestyle, but faith does have a major part with being a Christian. If you don't have faith, then whats the point of going through the motions of religion.

Now i consider your post an insult towards Lithanus. that guy is probably one of the most understanding human beings it has been my pleasure to meet on this site. he dosen't let personal bias cloud anything and actualy backs up what he believes. of course since you are under the delusion that there is no God. yuo will never accept the Word. and that saddens me.

sister, if you are going to sit in a christian guild remember not to insult the religion. now personaly i see nothign wrong with homosexuality. although that's probably because i'm bi. the only aspect of the lifestyle i don't like is the club/rave scene.

Thats ok, as for your appearance, the hair makes you look a little feminine, but I knew you were a guy. biggrin

Or rather you abandoned Him. God has always been with those that love Him, only those who reject God, does God reject. You have the choice to reject God, but you will receive the consequences. Life without God is hell, just so you know. If you want, I can show you how God has been with us, through even today.

What was your moment of utmost need?

Just because you didn't get a response from God doesn't mean He abandoned you. God answers all things in His time. Remember God is the one in charge, not us. He doesn't exist to satisfy our needs, but He does often anyways. He does answer those in need, but only if they trust in God. To those who cry out in pain for God, but only because they are in need and still have no intention of putting their faith in God, He often chooses not to interfere in their lives. He knows your heart, and knows when you are sincere, even when you do not. So if you cry out to Him, but do not trust Him, He'll treat you as you treat Him, by ignoring you. If you trusted God during that time you would have been patient for His help. It took years for God to help me out of my situation.

Now, if you feel like you knew Him then and He "abandoned" you, then it might be something entirely different. God has been known to test even the most faithful, Job is the best example of this. God sometimes allows bad things to happen, in order to help His people grow closer to Him. Perhaps, God allowed you to experience what you did because He wanted you to be able to relate to others who have gone through the same thing, and tell them your testimony of how you got through it. If you trust in God, He will never abandon you, He just might test you every now and then to help you grow. It is up to you whether or not to learn from the situation.

I know that God is with us today because of the personal experiences I had with Him. I was born into a Christ loving household, but with a father who had a lot of problems. I was taught about Christ and God, but didn't really Know God. My father held bible studies and knew a lot about the bible, but he allowed pride to cloud his vision and fell into a lot of sinful habits. Alcoholism wrecked his relationship between him and my mom, and me and my sister. My mom soon had to divorce him and being torn from us was one of the worst things he had to go through, because he did love us very much, but his addictions tore us apart from him. Not only that but cancer soon set in and his life was numbered after that. It gave him a lot of time to think, and he shared some of what he learned with me. I saw then how much he did love us and God, but I still saw all the pain he was going through, I even saw him die right in front of me. The whole time this was going on I was going through a lot of transitions in my life, new school, middle school, puberty, etc. Life was terrible then. The only thing that kept me going was church, and keep in mind I didn't go for the friends there, it was God. The kids I went to church with were jerks, but at least the teachers were God loving people. I learned a lot from those adults. I slowly learned that God was building me up that way. He let me know that He should be first priority in my life then. After a few years I received a few dreams/visions from God(they can be found in my journal). It was then I knew that He was a living God.

There are others that have testimonies that lead them to the same conclusion. Perhaps you'll have one yourself someday. I'm sorry to hear that you have also gone through tough times yourself, but God can help you out of them, if you trust Him to. I know from experience. If you want to Know God, I will do my best to answer your questions. There is much to be gained from a relationship with God I want you to see that.

God never promised to shelter us from pain and the consequences of sin. He sent Christ to make it bearable. God allows the consequences of sin because He gave us all the free will to do as we please, even sin. The Lord wants us to know the consequences of sin so that we may be disgusted with sin and desire to sin no more. God doesn't test you beyond what you can handle, unless you don't put your trust in Him. God helps us bare all things, if you trust Him. The reason why you feel pain, the reason why you can't stand it, its because you allowed the devil to break your spirit, and you turned from God. What happened to you may have been allowed by God, but it was the devil that made it happen. The book of Job points that out very well. Don't turn away from God just because things don't turn out the way you wanted them to. We all go through tough times, but what comes from them depends on you. You can give up and blame others, never change and spiral into oblivion, or you can strive to overcome the obstacles before you, realize your own weaknesses and change for the better. Just so you know, its never to late to change. I promise you, once you do, life starts to get better. Even if you encounter more pain and tough times, you'll at least have someone to help bare the pain, even when everyone else has left you. Don't let the devil take away your joy, break free of him and allow God to give you the joy you are missing out on.

You say you've never done anything to warrant a punishment like that? Something you must know to better understand the nature of God is he created all of creation for his glory alone. All of us are by no means deserving of his abounding grace. If he wanted to, he could send us all to Hell. Even still, he would be glorified. Painful experiences are common among us all. I don't know what you're going through, but blaming God will not accomplish a thing.
My life was a gaping abyss of nothingness, emptiness before I accepted Christ. To be shy enough that you cannot refrain from "freaking out" when someone says even a simple "hi" to you is pain. It was a prison within myself. Never able to express myself the slightest bit, never to make freinds, never to be remotely normal. I suffered from depression every day for years. The medicines wouldn't work. I was only growing further and further apart from humanity. I cried out in agony when I realized that I didn't know who I was, that I had nothing of worth to my name, that I am empty inside.
I went on a mission trip to Kenya, Africa last summer. There I saw poverty. I talked to a boy that said he couldn't go to church on Sunday because if he went, he couldn't eat that day. I saw a group of children at school that sat and watched as the others ate lunch because their parents couldn't afford to feed them.
And so I conclude that all experience pain. I still suffer from shyness, to a lesser extent, but this burden is with me to bring glory to God, that I may evangelize despite my weakness.
But perhaps I've been rambling. lol, forgive me.