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Kira-fightingdreamer Crew
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 Posted: Sat Sep 26, 2009 7:43 pm
Sigh, I haven't been on in a while but I'm glad that everyone is still posting in here.
Boldie, I'm sorry about the patch ): I wish it'd work longer for you, without.. the odd side effects but... yeah. *doesn't really know what to say*
Ailsa, I KNOW THIS WAS LIKE.. SIX DAYS AGO BUT. I had.. to comment.. on the poptart thing. They really should stock them over there just.. because.. poptarts are epic making store managers.. happy. >_> But anyway. I'm struggling, slightly, to figure out what's happening, though part of that may be because we've never had a private talk. But I really want to let you know that I'm sending a lot of my thoughts and prayers towards you, because I want you to at least find a stable ground in your life where days go by with you sinking down. Depression just, isn't a fun thing.
For anyone. ):
As to everyone else.. I really hope you all are doing okay, or at least feeling a little better inside.
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Posted: Sun Sep 27, 2009 2:46 pm
bittersweet and evocative Firstly, everyone should go and check out this youtube video, because finally some awareness of CRPS/RSD is coming onto national television. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbHgzWCAB2w It's the latest episode of House that is about to be released.
Now, onto your message Boldie. (My sister helped me to make my avi, and it's not so black-orientated for once!) I think the hardest thing is that I am tired so much that I find it hard to get the strength up to do anything. But I'm working on it. On Monday I have an appointment with my psychologist, so I may talk to her then. After our last appointment, I'm really not looking forward to going, but I have to, so I'm just going to try and not think about it until then. I feel sick whenever I think about going, but thankfully I've got a busy weekend ahead of me. It's the school ball tomorrow night, and my friend Effie is coming as my "date" because she goes to a different school, and we wanted to spend our last ball together. And, low and behold, I'm wearing a dress. I don't wear dresses. Ever.
Anyway, Boldie, I know you're worried about me, so I'm going to keep trying, ok? I'm off to a concert now, so I'll give you a PM when I get back/tomorrow morning. I've been emailing Madralyn this week, but I'm hoping we will be able to arrange another video chat some time soon. It's different being able to speak to someone face to face, you know? But I'm sorry for being so down all the time at the moment - I know I don't make great company. xx Ailsa xx
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bittersweet and evocative
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Posted: Sun Sep 27, 2009 7:06 pm
Boldie, I was just searching the net and came upon that preview. It's really exciting that it might actually raise more awareness for people like Madralyn and myself!! Anyway, I'm exhausted from the ball so I'm off for some down time. Oh, as8b, I got your letter today!! I'm just about to read it!!!!
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Posted: Tue Sep 29, 2009 7:32 am
Hey you guys sorry I haven't been able to do much on here.
I have two major tests this month (SAT and ACT)
then in november i have the SAT II subject tests (math and history)
So gaia is going to be very little right now. sorry. Then on top of that all next month I start appling to three collleges, and as of now I started applying to my first school. so four college applications.
Anywho,
AWW man, i missed house ! i hope it has a rerun!!
I hope everyone is doing really well! Sorry I don't have much to say, just really hecktic.
Hopefully by midnovember I'll be able to be backfull force on here.
But i'll be on ocassionally.
alrighy. talk to you all later,
I hope your pain is not as strong as it was yesterday.
Sincerely,
as8b
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Posted: Thu Oct 01, 2009 2:27 pm
AS8B, Madralyn knows about you, I'm assuming (hoping) since you're there every day just about. lol j/k I hope to see you soon, but, if I don't, I *DO wish you the best in your studies and SAT's.
Ailsa.... I'm here for you girl... I've just been trying to deal with my own chronic pain, that I'm afraid, I've been doing the least I can right now online. I'm sorry about that. It's not that life has gotten me down, it's just I can hardly walk again, and it's very tiring for me to do stand/sit/lay down.
Madralyn, I need to talk to you in private, and it's just a matter of me writing it, so please be expecting it either in email, or in a PM. It's not bad or anything, so please don't think that.
....For everyone else, I love you guys, but I'm fighting a losing battle daily. Please give me a chance to recover. All the prayers I can get would be a great gift for me, right about now....Thanks !
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Posted: Thu Oct 01, 2009 10:48 pm
Boldie, I wish I could be that friend who will say everything will get better undoubtedly and that everything will be ok, but I'm not. What I can say is that you are an amazing friend and an amazing person. A losing battle you say? Well, let's hold hands and go through it together ok? If we must lose, we can lose side by side. And prayers are the least I can give you.
as8b - good luck for all your tests! I sent off a letter for you early this week, so it should arrive (hopefully) quite soon. Maybe it will bring some interest into your study filled days? >< lol
Love to you all. I'm off to hang out with my friend, and do something about dinner. I think we're making pizza...I think. Oh, I saw the House episode involving CRPS, and although it lasted for around, ummm 11 minutes, it was still cool that it go mentioned!
Oh, and just a quick note to explain my absence. I'm having a bad time with doctors right now, so I've been making myself scarce. I'll post more later, if I get around to it. xx
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bittersweet and evocative
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A_Wolf_Drowning_In_Blood Crew
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Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 5:03 pm
Don't you two worry, boldie and Ailsa! We ALL know that there is a life outside of the virtual world! And that some people live in it.
Now, shall we listen to my rants and ramblings? I think so. (Haha!!!)
As you know, I have a shop on Gaia. For weeks now I have been meaning to draw a wolf for a customer, and I have done EXACTLY 20 pictures, but none make me proud D: so I don't know WAHT in the world I am going to do! And my list will be longer, oh, but I have a PM, probably about the banner I ordered. So, be looking for another post shortly!
-- Love to EVERYONE!
~Wolf
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Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 5:55 pm
Here is that list of complains...
1. As you all know, I live on A LOT of land. Well, recently I was walking through the woods, when I smell smoke. I go towards the Fort some friends and I made, and see strangers playing with fire in MY WOODS. Now, I didn't know if the people were old drunks, or stupid kids. So, just to be safe (In case they were crazy dangerous drunks) I let loose my dogs. (They don't like bad things. I guess they can sense I don't like things, too) They all ran up the rocks and started to growl, basically "herding" the intruders. I hear screams, and find it's some stupid kiddies. So, I walk on up and call off the dogs and confront them. I AM PISSED. I tell them to NEVER come back and tresspass, OR start a Fire ON SOMEBODY ELSE'S LAND. I let them go, just because they were young (About 12 or 13) and I myself am a Pyro.
2. By Birthday is coming up in a month and It is planning time! (For my party, that is) So, that means CLEANING. and lots of it! So, I need to get my basment cleared out, my room, living room, clear off (And keep clear) the dining room table, vaccum constantly, dust constantly, and keep the Kitchen straightened up! But I'm afraid that by the end of the day I don't have much eneregy left to do all of this. Even though my boyfriend has agreed to help, it's still a lot to be done.
3. Tis' the Season! And that means the seasons are changing. Which also means that my asthma just loves to act up... humph.
4. At school, in the Gym, there was a little Garder Snake! The teacher called on me to go and fetch her some paper to sweep it outside. I argued, saying that I could simply clamp it from around it's head, preventeing harm, and leaaving him outside. Oh, but no! She got some paper herself and SWEPT it out the door! The poor thing! If the scales are rubbed wrong, serious pain and damage could be done! I was aggravated! I am expierienced enough to know how to handle snakes! Geez... So after school I went out to find it. The little snakey was under a bush a ways into the woods. Poor little guy! I took him home where nobody can bother him.
5. On the bright side, I have a friend of mine coming over tomorrow! (a fellow Emo) WUV HER! Anyway, We are thinking of decorating MINI pumpkins! (80 cents at Safeway) And baking Chocolate Cupcakes, with Chocolate Icing, and Halloween sprinkles and little cupcake holder/cup things! YAY! And of course, watch PLENTY of Movies, and my favorite, BOARD GAMES! WHOOP!
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A_Wolf_Drowning_In_Blood Crew
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Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 6:59 pm
OKay Missy.... You got me.... (Now what I'm about to say, please take it the "right" way, ok?) But... What has this got to do with this forum? lol Other than your asthma, I'm sorry about that. lol ... and maybe you should proofread your posts BEFORE you press the submit button. Silly girl....... You have a heart of gold-poor snakey. I hope he does well on your land. The teacher was probably just concerned you didn't get hurt, thereby, having some sort of "law suit" on their hands, you know what I mean? That's why she did it. *sigh..........Btw, I posted in your new thread. Congrats to you "L". 
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Posted: Fri Oct 02, 2009 11:43 pm
Hey, I really need to distract myself so I thought I'd post here. I'm losing it. This "battle" that Boldie and I have been talking about. It's a horrible battle and it's got me beat. I give up. If even the doctors don't know what to do and they've resorted to blaming me for my conditions, then what other choice to I have? I've prayed. I've been praying a lot, but nothing has happened. I used to believe that there was a purpose for going through all this, but that belief died a few weeks ago, and it's like I only just got that memo now. But I don't know what to do. Madralyn, Boldie, Wolf, as8b, and everyone else (I'm sorry if I didn't name you!), I'm spent. The image I've included in this post is for two reasons. Firstly, to let you know that I'm always here if you need help, but also because it's a symbol of the fact I've run out of 5c pieces. I've run out of spoons. But the biggest one is this. I've run out of hope
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bittersweet and evocative
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A_Wolf_Drowning_In_Blood Crew
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Posted: Sat Oct 03, 2009 9:05 am
Oopsy, boldie! I guess I kinda thought I should've posted that extreme post here, because I failed to mention that all of that (And even more) is putting SOOO much stress on me! Espicially that cleaning... ew. I guess that since nothing much has been bothering me (pain-wise), I have nothing to post here, but Support, Hope, Love, and plenty of it!!!
Ailsa:: Don't give up! I know it must seem that you are failing, but you are trying! Just think, if you quit, how will that impact the rest of the world? Your family and friends? I know you might think, "Oh, but they might be glad that I'm gone so they don't have to bother with me." But, then again, I'm sure they will grieve and wish you still had hope inside you! They want you to be a fighter. I know it. We all want you to be a Fighter. You can do it!
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Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 1:45 pm
Wolf, the fact you posted my exact thought of "They won't have to bother with me any longer" is slightly chilling. Can you secretly read minds?! Anyway, I'm still around, which I guess is a good thing, although at the moment that thought tends to make me feel worse than better. Appointments have been keeping me insanely busy, and then there's all the homework on top of that. xx love you all xx
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bittersweet and evocative
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A_Wolf_Drowning_In_Blood Crew
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Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 3:23 pm
Ailsa, no I am not a mind reader! Haha! But I do think my friend is phsycic... (Can't spell today!!!) ANYWAY!!!
-- I only had that thought because I am who I am (emo)
I think that way a lot and I know that after my pro's and cons, I figure that my pros of living weigh out the cons.
Nothing much else can be said, since I still (even after my homework) have to make dinner (TACO SALAD!!! YUM YUM!!!) and go to the pet store... all the dogs, fish, and the lizard need food. Plus I think I will be stopping by the saddlery to buy a new bridle for Doragon. (My black Stallion) Oh, and then I have to CLEAN the Fish tank... oh gosh. COLLECT THOSE SPOONS! (and dollars, haha)
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Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 5:17 pm
Look up the song, Wake Up by Arcade Fire.
I think you would like it very much!
wolf - hello! =) how are you, sorry i haven't said much to you.
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Posted: Thu Oct 08, 2009 1:18 pm
Holy Cow, peoples! (Sorry for the '80s reference but I needed a good exclamation)
It means so much that you keep this thread going and help each other out. I have been absent due to the flu on top of another bacterial infection. It's been a rough few weeks health wise as my girls got the flu too but we are definitely on the mend and I'm hoping to spend more time with you all soon.
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