ButterBalls
Ah. You know Relay for Life sounds really familiar. What kind of work do they do again? I know you talk a lot about counseling and kids but do they do charity walks and runs? "Cause that sounds really, really familiar.
Since we don't frequently talk here I'll ask a lot of questions? Why did you guys break up originally? Why are you taking him back?
Relay for Life is put on by the Canadian Cancer Foundation. I'm pretty positive that it runs in the states too. Which is why it probably sounds familiar. Its a HUGE event, where you just walk all night. Its amazing. Actually, your equivalent might be Light the Night.
They work I do with the Cancer foundation, doesn't involve a lot of walks or runs. Mostly I just do camps and programming... Like taking my kids wakeboarding this weekend.
And now for the big one... I don't know why we broke up. He says its because he's away and he feels guilty knowing that I'm sitting here waiting for him. Which is a load, because I'm doing anything but waiting. But when we broke up, he said he needed space.
I don't know why I'm taking him back. When I'm with him, I feel SO good and everything feels so right... But when I go a week without him, I just doubt everything. If we talk in that week, then I'm ok, but most of the time we don't. He came back into town on Fri and came to see me... Even though it was hella late and he was tired. And everything was amazing... He even said he'd try and come out and meet my friends on Sat. Sat came, he called me and talked for a bit, promised he'd see me that night... I called him like, eight hours later and he was stunting, said he was sorry and he'd call me back... And that was the last time I spoke to him. Apparently I called him a lot last night, which I didn't realize because I was drunk, but he never answered his phone. I texted him today to apologize, tried calling... And nothing. So now I feel like Fri night was just a booty call.
I dunno. I need to learn to trust him, but I just don't know if I can. Its so complicated and messy. He says he wants to be with me, said he was going to come home to be with me for my birthday next weekend... Which is great that he's saying these things... But he's not doing anything to actually prove he wants to be with me. He can't even return a ******** call or text. I'm so frustrated and upset that I don't know what to do. My friend keeps telling me to ditch him, but she doesn't understand that it's a lot harder to ditch someone that you're emotionally attached to.
Wow, that was a long a** bitching session. I'm glad that you're doing well Butters. At least one of us is.
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