A.G.A. Chatter Box

[Sammirah]

Teeshann

i love everyone's halloween looks.

me too! blaugh  

[Sammirah]

Rachel Genova

A quote from my friend:

"SOMEDAYS. I just don't understand women. The other days they are just confusing"

Do you find this statement to be true? razz
At times, I agree. Even we don't know what we want. xp

sure, but i also find it to be true of many people regardless of gender. except for men xp  

[Sammirah]

Lilygwen

Sammirah

yeah, i've noticed as a hufflepuff that yellow is hard to match.

gaia_nitemareleft

There are few good yellow items in the rare item section, but since the prices of common EI's are too high up for me to get, I'm forced to make by with the stuff I have. The cash tree has been helpful so I've managed to get some gold from selling the free cash items but still, I wish there would be more color options on the gold shop items.

gaia_angelright

i've made a cute yellow and grey and orange hallowe'en avi, but i'm not quite ready to take this one off yet.

edit; i did get sick of the red and black, so here's the yellow one.  

[Camwen]

Sammirah

Rachel Genova

A quote from my friend:

"SOMEDAYS. I just don't understand women. The other days they are just confusing"

Do you find this statement to be true? razz
At times, I agree. Even we don't know what we want. xp

sure, but i also find it to be true of many people regardless of gender. except for men xp

I don't find this to be true. One thing I think can seem confusing is that women (not all but more so than men) are brought up to be more accommodating. We end up being less direct if we think something would involve hurting someone's feelings.

Take the example of a guy wanting to date a girl who is not interested in him. She, trying to let him down easy, might say something like "I'm just too busy right now to date anyone." The guy chooses to take this at face value and then is very surprised to see she is going out with someone else a week later. He decides women are flaky and don't know what they want - when the truth is she just wasn't in to him and was trying to be polite.

But the whole "women don't know what they want" is in my opinion a false stereotype.  

[Sammirah]

Camwen

Sammirah

Rachel Genova

A quote from my friend:

"SOMEDAYS. I just don't understand women. The other days they are just confusing"

Do you find this statement to be true? razz
At times, I agree. Even we don't know what we want. xp

sure, but i also find it to be true of many people regardless of gender. except for men xp

I don't find this to be true. One thing I think can seem confusing is that women (not all but more so than men) are brought up to be more accommodating. We end up being less direct if we think something would involve hurting someone's feelings.

Take the example of a guy wanting to date a girl who is not interested in him. She, trying to let him down easy, might say something like "I'm just too busy right now to date anyone." The guy chooses to take this at face value and then is very surprised to see she is going out with someone else a week later. He decides women are flaky and don't know what they want - when the truth is she just wasn't in to him and was trying to be polite.

But the whole "women don't know what they want" is in my opinion a false stereotype.

i agree that women tend to be less direct and men more so.  

[Camwen]

Sammirah

Camwen

Sammirah

Rachel Genova

A quote from my friend:

"SOMEDAYS. I just don't understand women. The other days they are just confusing"

Do you find this statement to be true? razz
At times, I agree. Even we don't know what we want. xp

sure, but i also find it to be true of many people regardless of gender. except for men xp

I don't find this to be true. One thing I think can seem confusing is that women (not all but more so than men) are brought up to be more accommodating. We end up being less direct if we think something would involve hurting someone's feelings.

Take the example of a guy wanting to date a girl who is not interested in him. She, trying to let him down easy, might say something like "I'm just too busy right now to date anyone." The guy chooses to take this at face value and then is very surprised to see she is going out with someone else a week later. He decides women are flaky and don't know what they want - when the truth is she just wasn't in to him and was trying to be polite.

But the whole "women don't know what they want" is in my opinion a false stereotype.

i agree that women tend to be less direct and men more so.

There's still a little bit of... a woman being direct = bitchy and a man being direct = confidant and assertive. Or at least that's the fear for some of us. But there are whole cultures where it's impolite to be direct. I think especially in the US we (in general) like to get to the point. In some Asian countries you have to circle around an issue as a rule. It's considered very rude if you skip all the social formalities.  

[Sammirah]

Camwen

Sammirah

Camwen

Sammirah

Rachel Genova

A quote from my friend:

"SOMEDAYS. I just don't understand women. The other days they are just confusing"

Do you find this statement to be true? razz
At times, I agree. Even we don't know what we want. xp

sure, but i also find it to be true of many people regardless of gender. except for men xp

I don't find this to be true. One thing I think can seem confusing is that women (not all but more so than men) are brought up to be more accommodating. We end up being less direct if we think something would involve hurting someone's feelings.

Take the example of a guy wanting to date a girl who is not interested in him. She, trying to let him down easy, might say something like "I'm just too busy right now to date anyone." The guy chooses to take this at face value and then is very surprised to see she is going out with someone else a week later. He decides women are flaky and don't know what they want - when the truth is she just wasn't in to him and was trying to be polite.

But the whole "women don't know what they want" is in my opinion a false stereotype.

i agree that women tend to be less direct and men more so.

There's still a little bit of... a woman being direct = bitchy and a man being direct = confidant and assertive. Or at least that's the fear for some of us. But there are whole cultures where it's impolite to be direct. I think especially in the US we (in general) like to get to the point. In some Asian countries you have to circle around an issue as a rule. It's considered very rude if you skip all the social formalities.

it's like that in bhutan, for sure. everyone is expected to beat around the bush if they want something or have something critical or negative to say, and i would say it applies even moreso to women. having been here for almost 2 years i just don't give a darn any more about protocol. i won't be rude, but i am very direct, and if someone gives me a useless or too vague reply, i will call them on it.  

[humble_gypsy_traveller]

Camwen

Sammirah

Rachel Genova

A quote from my friend:

"SOMEDAYS. I just don't understand women. The other days they are just confusing"

Do you find this statement to be true? razz
At times, I agree. Even we don't know what we want. xp

sure, but i also find it to be true of many people regardless of gender. except for men xp

I don't find this to be true. One thing I think can seem confusing is that women (not all but more so than men) are brought up to be more accommodating. We end up being less direct if we think something would involve hurting someone's feelings.

Take the example of a guy wanting to date a girl who is not interested in him. She, trying to let him down easy, might say something like "I'm just too busy right now to date anyone." The guy chooses to take this at face value and then is very surprised to see she is going out with someone else a week later. He decides women are flaky and don't know what they want - when the truth is she just wasn't in to him and was trying to be polite.

But the whole "women don't know what they want" is in my opinion a false stereotype.

Most of the women I've encountered intimately use that "let'em down gently" thing, instead of being more direct...that's what I see as the problem...I don't know about other men...but I highly believe that women do know what they want. It's just that most (I know I'm gonna get a slap for this) choose to use the run around approach.  

[humble_gypsy_traveller]

Sammirah

Camwen

Sammirah

Camwen

Sammirah

Rachel Genova

A quote from my friend:

"SOMEDAYS. I just don't understand women. The other days they are just confusing"

Do you find this statement to be true? razz
At times, I agree. Even we don't know what we want. xp

sure, but i also find it to be true of many people regardless of gender. except for men xp

I don't find this to be true. One thing I think can seem confusing is that women (not all but more so than men) are brought up to be more accommodating. We end up being less direct if we think something would involve hurting someone's feelings.

Take the example of a guy wanting to date a girl who is not interested in him. She, trying to let him down easy, might say something like "I'm just too busy right now to date anyone." The guy chooses to take this at face value and then is very surprised to see she is going out with someone else a week later. He decides women are flaky and don't know what they want - when the truth is she just wasn't in to him and was trying to be polite.

But the whole "women don't know what they want" is in my opinion a false stereotype.

i agree that women tend to be less direct and men more so.

There's still a little bit of... a woman being direct = bitchy and a man being direct = confidant and assertive. Or at least that's the fear for some of us. But there are whole cultures where it's impolite to be direct. I think especially in the US we (in general) like to get to the point. In some Asian countries you have to circle around an issue as a rule. It's considered very rude if you skip all the social formalities.

it's like that in bhutan, for sure. everyone is expected to beat around the bush if they want something or have something critical or negative to say, and i would say it applies even moreso to women. having been here for almost 2 years i just don't give a darn any more about protocol. i won't be rude, but i am very direct, and if someone gives me a useless or too vague reply, i will call them on it.

I like your style sammy...I'm that way too...may it help or hurt...just get it across straight.  

[Camwen]

humble_gypsy_traveller

Most of the women I've encountered intimately use that "let'em down gently" thing, instead of being more direct...that's what I see as the problem...I don't know about other men...but I highly believe that women do know what they want. It's just that most (I know I'm gonna get a slap for this) choose to use the run around approach.

I have to laugh a little though because honestly.. how different is it from when a girl wait's forever for that phone call from the guy who said "I'll call you" when he has no intention of ever calling.

Both men and women like to avoid confrontation. Most people I know don't like to hurt people's feelings on purpose. For some this means vague politeness and for others avoidance. And both men and women are guilty of ignoring the writing on the wall and continue hoping they still have a chance.  

[Sammirah]

Camwen

humble_gypsy_traveller

Most of the women I've encountered intimately use that "let'em down gently" thing, instead of being more direct...that's what I see as the problem...I don't know about other men...but I highly believe that women do know what they want. It's just that most (I know I'm gonna get a slap for this) choose to use the run around approach.

I have to laugh a little though because honestly.. how different is it from when a girl wait's forever for that phone call from the guy who said "I'll call you" when he has no intention of ever calling.

Both men and women like to avoid confrontation. Most people I know don't like to hurt people's feelings on purpose. For some this means vague politeness and for others avoidance. And both men and women are guilty of ignoring the writing on the wall and continue hoping they still have a chance.

i gotta say, i think cam's nailed it.  

[Sammirah]

hey, i was thinking it would be cool to have a place to discuss news and current events type things. do you think it would be better to just give each topic its own thread in the main forum, or have one news thread, or have a news subforum? the only thing about the last option is that the subforums tend to see a little less traffic, so i'm think about one of the other two...  

[humble_gypsy_traveller]

Camwen

humble_gypsy_traveller

Most of the women I've encountered intimately use that "let'em down gently" thing, instead of being more direct...that's what I see as the problem...I don't know about other men...but I highly believe that women do know what they want. It's just that most (I know I'm gonna get a slap for this) choose to use the run around approach.

I have to laugh a little though because honestly.. how different is it from when a girl wait's forever for that phone call from the guy who said "I'll call you" when he has no intention of ever calling.

Both men and women like to avoid confrontation. Most people I know don't like to hurt people's feelings on purpose. For some this means vague politeness and for others avoidance. And both men and women are guilty of ignoring the writing on the wall and continue hoping they still have a chance.

Okay, I will have to back down on my opinion...some guys are bad for that too. Personally, I find myself being polite and indirect to mostly those I don't know well. Except when they're being horrendously rude I would tell them where to go no matter if I've just met them or not...that's just the way I am. Does it make me bad to tell it like it is most of the time? I would say no...but then again, some people would see me as rude...oh well.  

[Camwen]

Sammirah

hey, i was thinking it would be cool to have a place to discuss news and current events type things. do you think it would be better to just give each topic its own thread in the main forum, or have one news thread, or have a news subforum? the only thing about the last option is that the subforums tend to see a little less traffic, so i'm think about one of the other two...

Not sure exactly what would be best for this. Normally this chatterbox thread could serve that purpose since we can talk about anything here. But...

In my mind there there are two reasons for needing a separate thread for news/current events; first would be if you're worried that the topic at hand would get too lost with other stuff before you're done wanting to discuss it, and second because those subjects often lead to political discussion and things can get more heated than we want for the chatterbox.

Let me ask you this - when you say news and current events, give an example of what you have in mind?

If we want a separate thread for real in-depth discussion of world events/politics then I would say a separate thread here in the main forum would be best. One thread should be fine. A thread for each separate topic would get to be too messy.  

[Camwen]

humble_gypsy_traveller

Okay, I will have to back down on my opinion...some guys are bad for that too. Personally, I find myself being polite and indirect to mostly those I don't know well. Except when they're being horrendously rude I would tell them where to go no matter if I've just met them or not...that's just the way I am. Does it make me bad to tell it like it is most of the time? I would say no...but then again, some people would see me as rude...oh well.

You don't seem rude at all. I don't know.. maybe you come across differently online than face to face but honestly you strike me as someone who is kind and tolerant and opinionated in a good way. If someone is being horrendously rude to you then of course it's natural to react to that in a um... "direct" way. lol

Here's how I see it (you probably notice I'm quite opinionated myself lol ): If someone's need to "say it like it is" completely overrides what's appropriate for the situation then there is a problem. For example, if you are at someone's wedding and you think the bride's father is a big jerk. Are you going to tell him that to his face in front of everyone? Or will you bite your tongue so the couple can have their nice day.

There's a difference between being honest when someone asks for your opinion and just blurting out things that might be hurtful for no reason.

This applies to people who are able to understand social norms of course. Someone with certain types of autism or other mental/emotional issues might struggle more with what is appropriate or not appropriate in a given social setting.