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 Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 3:45 am
"I ain't sure I can talk t' her yet. I mean, w' did talk some, but . . ." The boy shook his head. "I know it ain't me fault what happened, but I cannae stop feelin' like it is. How can I talk t' her when I cannae e'en really understand it meself?"
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 3:56 am
The man frowned, eyes wandering around the room as he thought. "It's either talk to her, or let things continue on as they are. Seeing the look she gives you and not understanding it, not knowing what she's thinking doesn't seem like something you would want to continue. You don't have to talk about what you don't understand right now." He looked to Rory, concern in his eyes. "Unless you think you'd rather just end it with Lee. That's..." he sighed, "that's the easiest solution if you really don't think it's something you can work out. Lee said she wanted to stay with you, but do you want to stay with her after everything that's happened?" Lee would hate him if she heard him right now, but it wasn't as if he was trying to break them up. He just wanted them both to be happiest, whatever that meant.
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:04 am
"Nae," Rory said, almost shouted. He sighed shaking his head, running a hand through his hair. "Nae, I donnae want t' leave her. It ain't tha' I wanna keep all this from her. She's th' first person I told what Lydia had done. I just feel . . . I dunno. Like a victim, maybe? It's stupid 'cause I'm partly t' blame fae lettin' th' situation get created. I guess part o' me doesnae want all o' this, th' tainted feelin' an' bein' unclean, I donnae want Lee t' start feelin' like tha', too. Yet, at th' same time, I know I'll ne'er get better wi'out her help. I just need somethin', I guess, t' bridge how I feel now an' how I wanna feel when I start talkin' more wi' her on it. I donnae know it tha' e'en makes sense." He pulled his bare feet up into the chair, hugging his knees, and rested his forehead down against his kneecaps. His body shook slightly with the tears he thought had all been shed. "I just want t' stop feelin' so scared."
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:19 am
"It makes sense..." Mr. Katan said quietly, watching the boy for a moment before looking down, allowing him some kind of privacy, as slight as it was. He knew nothing he could say would make it better, but he couldn't help but want to say something. "Everything you're feeling is completely justified, don't think that it's not. You have nothing to feel ashamed of, though." Was ashamed the right word? "Nothing to feel guilty for. But I know that won't change anything. Perhaps all you need is time..." He shut his mouth, figuring he wasn't helping. Letting the boy cry, Mr. Katan sat back in his chair, closing his eyes as he thought.
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:31 am
Eventually, Rory managed to get himself back under control, sniffling and wiping at his face with his t-shirt. "I'm sorry." He looked up at Mr. Katan, colorless irises even more apparent with his sob-reddened eyes. "I know it weren't me fault an' I know eventually I'm gonna feel tha' way, too. Reet now, I feel so hollow. Feels like somethin' got taken from me an' I ain't e'er gonna get it back. I wanna be a good man fae your daughter. I just . . . I think I need help."
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:36 am
Mr. Katan just smiled warmly at the boy, not wanting him to have to apologize. "What kind of help? Help from whom?"
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:37 am
Rory shrugged. "These sorta thin's donnae happen in didikai society. I thought outsiders had doctors an' such t' show people how t' feel better after they been hurt."
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:43 am
Mr. Katan smiled softly and nodded, happy he could finally be of some use. "I'll find someone for you. You can start whenever you'd like. How long do you think you'd need to have sessions with them? I imagine it can't be fixed in a day or two." Was Rory just going to leave Farstep every appointment he had with the doctor and come back as if nothing had happened? This wasn't exactly something one would want everyone knowing about.
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:47 am
"I dunno. I guess I should talk t' one o' them an' see what they say," Rory answered, shrugging. "If I hae t' gae a lot, then I'll make arrangements." Translation: he'd talk to his parents and Keagan. "Fae now, I just want t' know tha' after all tha' . . . tha' I'm still normal. Need t' be checked out by a physical doctor an' then one o' them mental ones."
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:53 am
Mr. Katan nodded. "The physical doctor you can see today, if you'd like. The mental one, however... I'll see if I can make you an appointment for tomorrow." With enough of a bribe, surely they could fit Rory into their schedule.
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 9:33 pm
"That'll do, then," Rory said, nodding. "Physical stuff is most important reet now." He unfolded himself from the chair and got up. "I'll gae tell Lee."
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 9:42 pm
Mr. Katan nodded a bit, sitting back in his chair as the boy stood. "Anything you need, just ask." Really, he couldn't do much for the boy that didn't involve payment of some kind.
Lee sat on the steps, letting Ki Du wander around the entrance while she waited. Her mother hadn't bothered to talk to her, and she didn't feel like being around the woman much anyway. So she waited, secretly desperate to know what Rory and her father were talking about, but controlling herself enough not to just walk in and listen. Rory hadn't wanted to talk to her, he'd wanted to talk to her father, and she needed to keep her nose out of it...
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 9:46 pm
Rory came out of the man's study and noticed Lee sitting on the steps. Giving a soft smile he walked over and sat down next to her. "Your da agreed t' take me t' a doctor today t' hae me checked out. Um, I donnae really remember much o' this morn wi' Lydia an' tha' includes protection. I donna think she used it wi' me. I just want t' make sure she didnae gi' me anythin'." He looked at her sidelong. "Your da's gonna get one o' them doctors tha' works wi' th' mind t' check me out t'morrow, too."
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 9:58 pm
Lee smiled weakly at the boy as he sat next to her, keeping herself from blurting out, "What'd ya talk about?" Luckily for her, Lee wasn't thinking about pregnancy after she heard Rory was going to the doctor, only focusing on possible STDs Lydia may have given him... and he, in turn, might give to her... Nodding, Lee wrapped her arm around his, letting her head rest on his shoulder. She supposed she'd just sleep while he was gone. She didn't exactly feel like doing anything else. "You're not gonna stay in that room tonight, are you?"
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Posted: Sat Oct 10, 2009 10:10 pm
Rory shook his head. "Your da said I could stay wi' you. I'll sleep on th' floor till th' results come back." He moved so he could rest his head against hers, watching the puppy snooze at the bottom of the steps. "I'm sorry about all this. It ain't exactly how I saw wor vacation at your parents gaen."
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