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 Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 12:48 am
The coon was rather surprised by Val's words. Was he really that transparent? This was one of those moments that Vlad would rather had lied than told the truth. I mean, how can you tell someone you barely know that they are attractive? That and how do you tell someone thathates themself that and make then believe it? The coon sighed and looked at Val. "Feelings...I think that is vhat is bothering me..." He blinked at him once before lowering his head. "Things that really only add to the problem...they do not help"
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 1:09 am
Something was bothering Vlad, that much the angel was sure of, but he could only assume it was linked to Ramos. But whatever it was, he was also hiding something. Nodding, he smiled and shrugged. Best to take it at face value, he supposed. "Sometimes feelings just seem to get in the way, make decisions more difficult," he sighed. His eyes went flat. "Let me know if you find a way to lose them. They only cause trouble."
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 1:14 am
Vlad sighed and shook his head. "I don't know if I vant to get rid of them though Val. Feelings are human...they are living. I don't vant to be a monster..." He sighed and shook his head over and over. "I feel like I sink further into the hole everyday...everytime I hide behind that mask."
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 1:31 am
Val closed his eyes and smiled darkly. But I am...and I still feel. He opened his eyes and looked down at the floor. "Then let go..." he said quietly. He looked up at Vlad. "Change yourself and stop hiding in the dark. But don't worry, even if you can't, that won't make you a monster." He smiled again in the same way, looking away again. "You and I seem to have different goals in mind," he mused.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 8:22 pm
"Perhaps...but...vill that really help me? vill releasing all the pain, hurt, anger...help me?" He sighed and looked ot Val. "I'm scared of vhat will happen...if I really let go...Feelings...arn't something I am use to Val...and...mine keep getting stronger.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 8:59 pm
Val took a deep breath, forcing himself to stop thinking of himself, but he still did not look at the coon. "I suppose it depends on you, as everyone is different. And the only way to know is to try." He shrugged almost nonchalantly. "If you are worried what will happen... you don't have to be in public to let your feelings go, right?"
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 9:06 pm
"no...i don't...you are correct there." He turned to look at Val, his eyes hard, but melting quickly. "You would hate me...if I let my feelings go, Val..." He reached out with a hand, his clawed fingers resting on Val's metal claw.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 9:27 pm
To his credit, Val realized how delicate the situation was, but for Vlad it was important to let go his feelings. Unfortunately, the angel found himself staring into the neat little hole he had dug for himself. Either the coon wanted to fight as his words seemed to have suggested, or just the opposite, which for Val could be just as bad or worse. "I rarely find occasion to hate people, Vlad," he said gently, looking down at both sets of claws together. "What is it you intend to do?"
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 9:44 pm
"This.." He leaned forward slightly, close enough to lighlty press his lips to the side of Val's mouth. He sighed and pulled away slowly, he was ashamed, embarassed even as he looked away from the angel. "I'm sorry..." He sighed and started to rise form the couch.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 10:00 pm
Val sat frozen for a moment, not responding beyond shock-widened eyes until Vlad began to get up. His fingers found his face where he had been kissed and his eyes slid shut. "It would have been so much easier if you had wanted to hit me..." he murmured, leaning forward to cradle his head in his hand.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 10:05 pm
The coon was standing now. His head turend to look at the window f he room rather than Val. "I couldn't hit you...I'm sorry..." He touched his own lips, his body shaking. He was angery at himself, he shouldn't have done that, things had just gotten so much harder. "i...." he moved to the window, sitting on the sill, starring out into the backyard.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 10:26 pm
Val looked up and watched the coon stand next to the window and realized how awful what he had said sounded. He sighed and rose to his feet, then joined Vlad by the window. "No... I'm sorry, that came out wrong. Or at least...you couldn't have taken it any other way." He sighed again and frowned down at his hands. "For the longest time, I just wanted to put my past behind me and try to live a normal life. But lately I've found that it's an impossible dream. I'm not like you. Remember those experiments I mentioned? What you see is not all that I am." He looked up at Vlad's eyes intently, whether he wanted to look at him or not. "You have a chance... You and Ramos could get used to people and live normally. I'm sure of it. But me..." He trailed off and shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest. He looked out the window but saw something else entirely. Someone. As he saw it, Nyoko had been his last chance. He had seemed like the one person with the most open mind... and he had failed miserably.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 10:41 pm
Vlad sighed and forced himself to look at Val. "Val...I don't care abot your past...and I do not care what has happened to you. There is nothing that you could have done that is any worse than the things i was forced to commit." He sighed and shook his head, looking back out the window. "even if you were the monster that I was...I could not judge you.."
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 10:56 pm
Ny said the same thing, Val thought bitterly, at least about not caring about his past. "But I was...and still am." He sighed and shook his head slightly. People never really listened, but what could he expect? What had he wanted to happen? He had no idea. Clearing his throat, he pulled back from the window and said, "I should go. You um, keep trying. You'll do fine. I'll have Asalind come by in a couple days. He's a naga...wears a red vest and keeps his hair in a long braid." Suddenly leaving, quickly, seemed his safest bet. And he hated it.
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Posted: Sun Apr 09, 2006 10:59 pm
Vlad turned his head to look at the other, his hand reaching out to grab for the angel's arm. That hand, that clawed hand that was so similar yet so different from Val's. "Don't...running away from what you are will not help things Val..." He held the other's arm tight, those blood staind claws catching the dim light of the room. "Show me....show me this monster you are..."
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