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 Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 7:02 pm
Kikue immediately felt uncomfortable. She knew he was only trying to help her feel better, but she felt worse. I'm not a cat! But...she was. It was in her! It had changed her body...how could she say any different?
But I'm not an animal...it doesn't matter if I have one in me...if it's a part of me. I can still think and feel things that no animal can. I am still human!
She planted her paw back over her muzzle, preventing him from stroking it again. "I -- I don't know," she whispered softly. Her ears lay back against her head. "...In Japan, cats are often crossed with people in media and stories to be cute. Of course it's never real... It feels like a play off of that; like a little joke someone played on me... I know it could have been worse but I..."
She let her paw slowly fall to her lap. She forced a sad smile. "I guess being anything is going to still feel...strange..." Such an obvious thing. But her mind felt muddled; she didn't want to react badly to him again and make him upset. What was she anymore? Cat? Human? I am...both... And what a revelation it was. Hadn't she been over this with herself already?
It gets harder every time... If Nita knows the truth then, one more time... And I... It'll be done... I'll be...
A cat. Walking on two legs, with the mind of a girl inside.
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Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 7:08 pm
Miller stoped strokeing her muzzle as she returned her paw frowning slightly, was he helping? Or was he makeing it worse? It wasn't apparent as she seemed over all to be upset, and he couldn't blame her for being so.
"Anime cat girls... yah I know a bit about that." He frowned recalling the trail and the boddies, "Much worse, but your alive still, and minus the paws and fur, your alot closer to human then what could have happened."
He smiled a bit, "Look on the bright side, your somewhat use to it? I don't even know how I'm going to deal with..." he couldn't begin to say it. His change? Transformation? This wasn't some cartoon or comic book fantasy novel. It would hurt and Kikue's cries already taught him that all to well.
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Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 7:17 pm
Her ears pricked up, but still continued to droop. She nodded solemnly, putting her paws into her lap. She bowed her head, thinking about that. "You are right... I've seen people here worse off than I am... I have to make myself remember that, but always after a new change...it's much harder to remember..."
Glancing up at him, a sympathetic and still sad smile spread across her features. "...No one ever really gets used to it, even if you know that it's coming... But..." Her expression became serious. "The first transformation is not too bad...it wasn't for me. It changes select, certain things...you don't really change significantly until the second time..."
Kikue reflected on her own words. Suddenly, she stood up from the bed onto her over-sized cat feet, hugging her arms around herself. She looked away from Miller, shutting her eyes tightly. "I'm sorry... I'm not really sure what I'm even saying right now..." The aching, throbbing pain was still with her -- even more so when standing up on her feet. And in the pit of her stomach, she felt hunger...like she had after the other changes. She could control it, but it put her more on edge.
She turned back to him, bowing low Japanese-style. She did not raise her eyes to him. "Thank you...for your help, Miller... I...I think I need to be alone for a little while...I don't feel very well..." Straightening slowly, she tilted her head, placing one paw on top of the other and forcing a smile. "I don't mind if you keep the yukata...please consider it a gift. For helping me."
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Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 7:29 pm
Miller leaned over trying to get a glimps of her face as she spoke looking down at her lap, "It makes sense, so long as you remember who you are though the transformation doesn't matter that much does it?" It was some what hard to be optimistic but he tried to do his best for her.
Miller returned the small smile, "Someday it'll be normal for you at least? I still have to see whats going to happen to my self..." I might not even live to see what I become. he shivered visibly at the thought and her mentions of the first change.
He looked up startled at her sudden blur of movements as she got up moving away from him. "No it's okay, you're making sense there's nothing wrong with what you just said..."
He got up slowly as she bowed and tilted his head nodding slowly. The smile felt fake but it seemed like she was okay so it shouldn't be a risk to leave her alone. "Thank you for the Yukata..." he started towards the door slowly opening it looking back, "If you ever need anything you can stop by my duplex..." With that he headed back to his own duplex.
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Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2006 8:08 pm
Kikue held her soft smile as Miller left. She waved before he was gone, softly adding, "Okay... Goodbye..." As the door closed behind him, Kikue counted silently to ten, then went to the door and locked it. Turning back around to her empty room, she buried her face in her hands, trying to stop the tears before the started. It was no use. She headed for the bathroom, to take a hot bath -- hoping it would take the edge off the pain in her changed muscles.
...And to face whatever was going to be looking back at her from the mirror.
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Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 10:57 am
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Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 10:58 am
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Posted: Mon Nov 27, 2006 3:54 pm
Roleplay ID ID #: 020 Started On: Sat Nov 25, 2006 2:13 pm Completed On: Sun Nov 26, 2006 12:30 am Characters: Kikue, MillerOriginal Link: Click. Synopsis: Kikue's second meeting with Miller. She receives a special present... Miller Milano Lay in his bed today idely toying with the braclet that had arrived just yesterday morning well before the little food fight fiasco. He wondered if Kikue would actually be willing to stop by his duplex like the note he had left her asked. It was a simple note simply saying to stop by and that he had a surprise for her. Still he wasn't sure if the girl would come.
She seemed pretty hurried to have him leave after all the trouble she had been through, perhapse she wanted to be left alone like Amaya's friend did. He shook his head though, he gave advice to Amaya to check on Alec and here he was with out the spine to do it him self for Kikue. He rolled over on his bed looking at the door debateing the thought of going to her duplex instead. Yamamoto Kikue Kikue stood outside the door, her paws shaking ever so slightly as she held the note that Miller had left. She might never have gotten it at all, if she hadn't been coming back from her first...mistake. Was it a mistake? Or should she be giving in? The memory of the dead rabbit at her feet, the one she had killed with her own claws and teeth, the one whose blood was dripping from her mouth and had stained her hair... She shook her head, forcing herself to regain some amount of control. She took a deep breath through her nose, her whiskers twitching. Couldn't think about it right now...she has washed herself up just fine, there was nothing wrong... Nothing wrong, except...To shut out her own thoughts, she knocked awkwardly on the door with a curled paw. Miller Milano Miller had started to roll the other way when the knock shook him out of his thoughts and caused him to jump out the bed. Why am I freaking out? It's proably just Kikue. He shook his head and started for the door checking through the peep hole to see the familure face of Kikue on the other side, he slipped the braclet back in the box sticking it in his pocket before opening the door with a smile.
"Heya, I see you got the note?" He moved back from the door waveing her in offering her a seat on his bed. "It took a little while to get your surprise but I hope you like it." Yamamoto Kikue "Yes, I..." Kikue started, her ears flicking after Miller had opened the door. The note was still clutched in her paw, somewhat crumpled now. But, 'your surprise'? Kikue didn't know what to say? "S-Surprise?" she repeated, momentarily confused. Was it her birthday? Had she forgotten? No...it had passed in the labs, in the dark group of weeks... Her birthday was long past now. She padded silently into the room, looking for all the world as out of place as was possible. She felt so nervous, afraid -- the memories of the events that had just passed only a day ago were like poison in her mind. She kept her eyes on Miller, but all she could think about was -- what if I hurt him? What if I do it and I don't even mean to?Kikue clamped down on emotions as best she could. No, that was stupid. Unless he did something provoking...something that startled her so much that she couldn't control herself...everything would be fine, because she had eaten and...everything would be fine. She shifted her weight from one paw the other, her tail lashing behind her. Miller Milano Miller smiled nodding to the girl, "Yes, a surprise to say thank you for the gift you gave me a few days back." He tried to remember the better parts of that meeting, but he was still ready to run for it if she got too carried away again. He didn't want to think about if he could actually out run her or not though.
"Close your eyes okay? And hold you your wrist for me." Once she did this he pulled the box out slipping it open again, carefully he took the silver braclet out wraping it gently around her wrist and clicking it togeather. "A thank you for the clothes and not kicking me out for showing up at your front door makeing a fool of my self." Yamamoto Kikue Kikue held out her hand obediently, closing her eyes. She tried to stammer out something about how he didn't have to repay her for the "present" -- in fact, she hadn't even thought of the yukata she had given him that day. It felt like it had been a long time ago already...but that one had been the most like a boy's that she had; and she'd bought it herself back home -- She felt the tiny addition slip onto her wrist. As she opened her eyes, she had to suck in a breath in surprise. "Oh..." she started, holding her wrist closer to herself. Against the fur, the silvery-blue bracelet stood out plainly...it seemed so normal, so pretty, even on her. Kikue looked up at Miller, flattered. She smiled warmly. "It's beautiful...thank you..." Miller Milano Miller smiled happily as Kikue admired the braclet. He had never been one to be good at shoping for gifts but this time he could safely say he got the right gift for her.
He shrugged his shoulders as casually as he could trying not to seem overly excited that she was so happy with the gift. "I wanted to get you something nice as a thank you... you didn't have to give me anything or help me but you still did even after all the stuff you had to go through right then..." His voice trailed off with a hint of a blush at the whole situation. Yamamoto Kikue Kikue's smiled broadened. "But you helped me too, even though the whole situation was probably scary for you as well..." Kikue held her uplifted arm to herself, feeling for the first time -- in a long time -- pretty. Just for the briefest moment in time... Kikue blinked carefully, really noticing Miller then...he hadn't changed. He hadn't changed yet? She felt some relief at this, that he should still be clinging to his humanity, yet...she knew the dangers people had talked about if you stopped the serums... "Miller...how long have you been on the Island, now?" Her voice had a tone of worry to it, even as she held her wrist to herself, plainly in love with his gift. Somehow the stones made her think of her mother... Miller Milano Miller shrugged again, "You can't even begin to imagine how scarry it was to see you stop moveing and lay that still only to have you knock me over. I'm just glad your still your self even after that."
He blinked at the some what random question, "A little over three weeks now. I've started to get used to it here now really." He smiled still though watching her admire the bracelet it amused him somewhat reminding him of a cat eyeing a shiney ball and pawing at it yet she was far from a small cat. She was a girl, not much younger then him. Yamamoto Kikue Kikue hung her head a little, remembering how she had pounced him without asking questions. The instincts after a change pushed her to the breaking point... She tried to hold off an apology, knowing he would probably dismiss it, because she had said she was sorry for that so many, many times now... She could only nod her head, not really being able to imagine what it must have been like to be watching her through the change. The strangest part was still her feet...she was taller now. Somehow her large, changed feet had pushed her upwards. It made the world an even stranger place. Blowing out a breath through her teeth, she laid her ears back against her head. Three weeks...when did I first change? I can't even remember...but it felt like it happened so fast... I have to check my records, I can probably create a loose timetable about when these things happen... "I was worried that...you would be changed already..." She curled her tail around one of her legs idly. Turning her attention back to her bracelet, she held her wrist aloft in the air a little, so she could admire it again. The light catching on it was indeed mesmerizing, but she didn't know why. To wear something so normal felt freeing. She had never worn jewelry. But she liked it. Miller Milano Miller knew alot less about the transformation stages, he hadn't even realized how long it had been since he had arrived. Thom had said it would happen 'eventually' but how soon would it be? And hadn't he seen Shenzi at the food fight? She looked diffrent, was he suaposed to change along with her? Was this normal?
He looked up at Kikue again blinking, "That I had changed? It's going to happen... eventually... but does it matter if were still our selves afterwards?" He had yet to learn of the side effects and the fact that one lost part of them selves to the changes in some cases. Yamamoto Kikue "Well...I...well, things happen, with the changes..." A pained look crossed Kikue's face. She had no idea what to say. What could she possible say to him that would explain everything? And yet at the same time, she didn't want to explain all of it -- because it hurt, to hear it. Being on the outside, not knowing...only watching...she had been there before, and been afraid, wondering when it was going to happen to her. She bit back a sardonic laugh. Now look at me..."It happened not long after I came here...a few weeks, like you..." She frowned, coming closer and putting her heavy, large paw on his shoulder. "If I remember rightly, it's probably not far away for you...but I'm glad that you're still okay, right now..." She pulled away then, knowing he might not like the close contact after their first meeting. Thankfully she was somewhat distracted, turning the bracelet over her wrist with two aptly placed claws. Mother...the colors. Make me think of you.Miller Milano Miller frowned he didn't want to talk about changes, he was afraid of it repulsed by it and knew he had no way to stop it. He looked up slowly with a sad smile as she moved away and mentioned how she was glad for him. "Your the first person who made being human still sound decent... every one else seems so spiteful about it acting like its wrong for me to be like this still."
As she pulled away though he frowned a bit, it felt like she was afraid of him now rather then concerned for him. "Is... there something wrong?" Yamamoto Kikue The news was strange to Kikue. So, it seemed apparent now that other people only felt Miller's humanity was something to throw back in his face. What was the point of that? People do stupid things when they're in situations out of their control... She twitched her whiskers, a bitter taste in her mouth. People always reacted stupidly when they felt the pressure of someone else in control. Interesting. Noting his question, she quickly attempted to dispel any ill feeling he might have. "Oh...n-no...nothing's wrong...I was just..." She looked at the bracelet again. "...Thinking about my mother..." Miller Milano Miller though some what depressed thinking about how others viewed him couldn't help but find a bit of amussment in the whisker twitching that Kikue was doing. It was well, cute. Even if it was a bit odd to see a girl twitching whiskers on her own nose.
"Family... I wonder what mine think... up and running away only to completely disappear, I left everything. What few friends I have my family. And all it gets me is a one way ticket to a living nightmare on a tropical island..." he frowned turning to Kikue, "But I don't mean to say your a bad thing here! I'm glad to have met some of the people here like you!" Yamamoto Kikue Kikue was surprised to hear Miller talk of his family. Most people that she had met so far avoided the topic. She knew very little about most peoples' pasts...considering she knew very few people on the Island in the first place. It came with the territory of constantly hiding out in one's room. "You...ran away?" She tilted her head, her ears flicking upwards. This was new. It reminded her of Fiona... Kikue swallowed the lump in her throat. Better not to think about that. Kikue wasn't sure if it would be polite to ask, simply, 'Why did you leave your family?'. In the end, she had done the same thing...although she had an inkling that her reasons were probably very different from Miller's... Miller Milano Miller nodded quietly, "In a way yes... I was always a slacker, I didn't care about apeaseing society. I didn't care about school and being politically correct I spoke my mind and did what I want. They wanted me to go to collage so I moved out to an apartment on campus for some collage in Penslvina but a few days latter I was up and gone to the Carabieans on a vacation." He sighed sadly.
"I left because I felt like I didn't fit, so I just sorta just left..." Yamamoto Kikue Kikue's eyes widened. Now here was something she had never expected to hear. The idea of leaving everything because of being 'forced' to go to university had never even hit her as an option. University was something she had aspired to; had worked for. Cram school for exams and entrance tests was standard fare for Kikue's once-upon-a-time schedule. She had trouble grasping the concept of being forced into higher education at all. "...You didn't want to go to university?" she questioned, confused. Not that she wasn't aware there were many people who simply loathed school. But university -- hating it, dreading it? Dreading the entrance exams, probably, but to not want to go at all was simply alien to her. "How did you get the money to go on a vacation that ended up being this Island?" Her question was more thoughtful than accusing. She tilted her head again. People never stopped surprising her. Miller Milano Miller laughed some what at her surprise. "Nope, didn't want to, I wanted to travel, to see the world and along the way learn things that might be usefull in life. I mean really, who gives half a rats a** as to what X equals in half of those math problems any way?"
He nodded at her second question, this was the part that he wasn't proud of by a long shot. "I took the collage money... and spent it on my vacation... and when I ran out I needed a job. Well in the Caribbeans people can easily disappear especially when they pick up a flier about medical testing for feral labs to get cash." Yamamoto Kikue As a matter of fact, Kikue found "X equals" to be one of the more interesting things in life, besides her music. She raised an eyebrow at his easy dismissal of the university curriculum. There was a bit of a faint smirk to her expression, but she let him continue. She wasn't one to initiate debates on purpose. She found it all to be quite amusing, really. The catch about Feral Labs made her ears droop. "...So...it was a medical promotion. And you were already fairly close to the Island, being where you were -- at least, we're somewhere in those waters, I think." She frowned. The labs would have to be careful about netting tourists, or anyone that might be noticed if they went missing...but random locals, and people who were already trying to disappear? Prime targets, no doubt. She sighed heavily. "The scope of this project is huge..." Miller Milano Miller raised an eyebrow as she seemed amused at his typical rantings on the lack of faith he had in the school system. Most people normally told him to shut up and do the work and that it would help him some day. Being stuck on an island knowing how to find X in a math problem truely did not help at all.
"Yup, a plain little flier, I called them they asked a few questions and next thing I knew I was on a helicopter being whisked away to what promised to be a rather easy job with good pay and a tropical life style." He shrugged, "Forget about the project the island for a bit I hate thinking about it. We should go do something, swimming or the entertainment room. It beast moaping about in here doesn't it?" Really it was his way of changing the subject from his mistakes, his short comings and his over all bitter outlook on the whole situation that was bound to come up. Yamamoto Kikue Kikue blinked at the sudden topic change. She kept her thoughts to herself, but mulled over the Labs' ideas about how snare people and bring them into the project. If they were as far as Tokyo, they could -- and probably were -- just about anywhere. Wasn't money an issue for these people? No...it can't be...whatever is fueling this project financially doesn't seem to have any end in sight...they just keep going, and who knows how much even one serum costs. It must be a huge amount of money...Kikue scratched the back of her neck, the sharp claws finally serving some purpose in that regard. The fur over her body was so thick that she needed them, now. "...Well, I...I don't do very well outside..." She gave him a bit of a sheepish smile, choosing not to elaborate. Even getting to his duplex had meant going out into the tropical heat for the briefest of moments, which was painful. Miller Milano Miller tilted his head slightly wondering why Kikue didn't do well outside, perhaps it was all the fur that caused the problem? "Is it the heat that's a problem? Theres a river not too far from here that I went swimming in a few days ago that feels great in weather like todays." Yamamoto Kikue Kikue sighed. "Yes...it's the heat...I can't stay out very long at all...it's why I have to keep my duplex so cold...even more now because of..." She gestured silently at the fur that now covered every inch of her body. Forcing a smile, she tried not to think how much she hated the feeling of panting once it was too much to bear. The overheating made her do it without thinking. Miller Milano Miller gave her a sympathetic nod, he couldn't even begin to imagine how awful it would be to wander the island constantly being overcome by the heat. "Like I said we could always go swimming and I'm sure theres a way we can turn the AC up in the entertainment room... I think..." He frowned trying to sort out a way that Kikue could at least have some sort of fun on the island. Yamamoto Kikue "I find that most other people tend to get uncomfortable with the level of cold that I need..." She gave a nervous laugh, remembering Zach's shivering the first and only time that he had come into her duplex. Placing her paws on top of each other, she bowed Japanese-style to Miller, in thanks mostly for his concern. "It's all right...I find there are things for me to do in my duplex...but I don't know what will happen with my last change...I suppose they'll have to find some way to make snow." The forced smile on her face was easy to see through, but she could find no other way to lighten the mood. She rarely ever left her room, as much as it would drive the cat in her crazy. Once she stepped outside, even the cat would rather go back in. And then just become restless again. Miller Milano Miller shrugged, "It wasn't that bad when I was at your place." He smiled sadly trying to go along with her joke about the snow but he knew it was her way of trying to deal with it all. Once more he could only sit back and feel pity for the girl. "Well it's getting close to winter right now? Maybe the island will start to cool down some?" Yamamoto Kikue Kikue put a paw on her bracelet, smiling as if to herself. "It might..." She knew it wouldn't. They were on a tropical island; the most this place would get was most likely heavy rain. But the thought of being stuck in some exhibit, just to be able to be at peace with this animal that was her now...it made her feel sick. Would they stick her in a huge room with snow and rocks and high places, so that she wouldn't go insane? And throw in small animals every now and then? Gods it made her feel ill. But where could she go? She wanted high, open places...cold places...but there were none... She had ventured out long enough to kill a rabbit. At least then she could forget, even when she was panting and eating the thing. Maybe if it had been some at that lived in the heat... What a ridiculous thought. She licked one of her paws, because it distracted her. Even though it was embarrassing to do it. There was nothing else for it. Miller Milano Miller sat quietly now as Kikue seemed to withdraw in to her self again. She always seemed friendly towards him yet at moments like this he felt as though she was a million miles away hiding her self from him and her thoughts.
He reached out slowly to place a hand on top the one she still kept in her lap, while she licked at the other, "Is there anything I can do to help at all with it?" He knew he couldn't make it snow, or the heat go away, but there had to be something right? Yamamoto Kikue Kikue stopped with her tongue mostly out of her mouth. She stopped cleaning herself to smile again. "It's okay," she said softly, with that smile. "I don't think there's anything. If I just try to listen to these instincts that I have and not try to argue with what I need now, I can get through the day..." Almost. But the cat, it wanted out. It wanted to look out over things...high places, cold places, mountain places. Staying inside was cold enough, but there was nothing to look out over. Nothing to breathe... She shook herself. She kept falling into the thoughts. The smile was forced again. "Thank you for the present... I'll probably just go back to my room... Maybe, one day, you can come over again and watch some of the things I brought with me..." Miller Milano Miller found the look on Kikue's face with her tongue half out as she stoped to smile amuseing not in a rude way but it just made him smile for some reason. "Well so long as what ever you do makes you happy and feel good then thats okay I would guess."
For a breif moment she almost seemed happy yet as always a forced smile filled her face. "I'd like that sometime... yes." He wished she didn't have to go, it got lonely sometimes in the duplex, it got lonely period on the island sometimes. Perhapse he should take up random wandering so he might bump in to people like Newt again. "Any complaints if I walk back with you? I have nothing to do really and killing time with out a computer is a pain." Yamamoto Kikue Kikue laughed a little, finding the comment about the computer funny. She had one, but almost only did work on it...work for the database, or other things she called 'work' but knew they had no meaning. "Okay...that is fine..." Her ears instinctively went back against her skull, knowing the heat was out there. She stood up, crossing her paws, she was ready to go back to where it was cold. Miller Milano Miller made a face as she laughed, he was a dork and proud of it to a point. Computers were meant to aid in work and then double in entertainment in his eyes. He reached in to the fridge grabing two sodas stuffing one in to his shorts large pockets heading for the door. "Shall we be off then?" Yamamoto Kikue Kikue bowed again, and then she nodded. She wasn't sure if he remembered where he duplex was, although the note he had left proved otherwise. She approached the door, opening it, even though part of her said it might not be polite to go ahead. She started out into the heat, her nose wrinkling at the heavy air. Miller Milano Miller didn't mind who went first, if anything in his mind it was the ladies first but then again she seemed traditional to her heratige and might have said other wise.
Still today was a day even Miller was displeased with, muggy and damp but still very warm and hot, the kind of day that sweating only made things worse. "Blah, I don't even want to be outside now..." he opened the soda at once taking a quick sip wondering just how cold it would be in the next few minutes. Yamamoto Kikue Kikue nodded her head dully, her ears crumpled against her head. The air was nothing short of disgusting. She headed for her duplex immediately, Miller's note still scrunched in one of her paws. Inside...inside...inside... She wanted to say something polite, like he didn't have to take her back, but her mind was bent on merely getting there first. Miller Milano Miller followed just as quickly, he hadn't even noticed that his soda was empty now in his attempts to cool off in the disgusting weather. No matter how uncomfortably cold Kikue's room would be for Miller it had to top this weather. Yamamoto Kikue Kikue led the way back to her duplex. It wasn't too far, but it made her conscious again of how many people were on the Island so far. And how many more would come? Did they really have the facilities to accommodate a never-ending stream of subjects? Surely the Island could only be so big... But what about the people who were done their serums...would they kill them once they were done with them? She shuddered, even in the heat. The thought made her skin crawl. She tried to shake it off, and stood at her duplex door, fumbling with her key in her large paws. The door was always locked. She didn't trust to keep it open, especially when she was away...but even when she was inside. It wasn't safe. Miller Milano Miller ran a shoulder across his face trying to clear the sweat from his face. He watched the duplexes roll by, how many of these people would he meet? How many would he never see? He could only wonder.
When they arrived at Kikue's duplex he reached over slowly tapping her shoulder holding out his other hand having long since dropped the can a while back. He wasn't sure how to ask to help her though. Here let me give you a hand, she would probably hate me for that comment... Yamamoto Kikue Kikue was, in fact, grateful for his help, even though she often preferred to do things on her own. Her paws just weren't cooperating and she was getting frustrated -- something she rarely ever was. She placed the key into one of Miller's hands, stepping back a little so that he could get to the doorknob. She said nothing, simply because she did not want to acknowledge what she was doing -- or rather, not doing. It had been a task to write by hand anymore, much less open her door. It was a revelation she was trying to ignore. Miller Milano With out a word due to respect Miller took the key in to his hand giveing Kikue's own hand a gentle squeeze. He turned back to the door slipping it in clicking the door open to be greeted by a freshing cold breeze.
He stepped aside holding the key out to Kikue again allowing her to go first figuring she needed to get out of the heat before him. Yamamoto Kikue Kikue gave him a grateful smile, accepting the key back again. "Thank you," she said, although her voice was but above a whisper. She slipped inside, the cold blast of air like a refreshing breeze to her. Once her paws were inside, she took a deep breath, her nostrils flaring. Good. This was good. Immediately, armed with the human part of her mind, she clamped down on the inevitable surge of instinct that someone was invading her territory by passing the threshold of her door. It was always like this, always fighting to even get people inside where she might be able to socialize with them. Turning on her heel, she faced Miller, being very careful to keep control over her instincts...which were far from happy. She forced a fragile smile. "You're...you're welcome to stay...I was planning on taking a nap after visiting but...I could probably stay awake a while longer..." Kikue paused there, knowing she'd have to at least mention what was going on in her head at the same time. "Only...it's important to tell you that my animal is very territorial...which is why it is hard for me to invite people to my duplex...the cat part feels like it's being invaded upon...so I do my best to control that." All she stared at the floor while she said this, trying not to seem threatening ( as much as it was possible ). Everything was so complicated. Miller Milano Miller smiled and shrugged his shoulders, "Least I could do really..." he turned to start following her in but was stopped as she suddenly turned to face him.
He stood still as she explained it all too him, he realized now why she always seemed so shy around him. She was afraid of what happened when she changed repeating again, only it would be far much worse then last time if it happened.
Very slowly he reached out his hands shaking very gently as he questioned if this was a good idea. Slowly he placed his hands on her shoulders looking at her. "I... trust you Kikue... your not a bad person... the cat or you, both of you are welcome in my home if it makes things easier for us to visit. I'll even turn on the AC for you if you let me know your coming." Yamamoto Kikue Kikue stared. She felt awash with emotion again, something she had always been able to control, only to break down on this island and loser her grip. But this...she didn't know what to say. She was rooted to the spot, looking at Miller's unchanged face -- oh but it would change, soon, and that was an even more depressing thought -- but for right now, it was the same as before. And saying these things... Tears welled up in her eyes. She couldn't stop herself. She wanted to be in control; she wanted to not let the cat take over when someone startled her into it. Like when she had changed... She reached out, putting her now strong arms around him, hugging him. She stuffed her face in the crook of his neck and tried not to get too upset. Miller was nice. Nice like Nita. People like that made her resolve come back to her...made her think she could still do this. He thinks I'm not a bad person, even after what I did during the change. I know I couldn't stop it...but that doesn't mean it was okay...She was thankful that he had even the courage to say all of it to her, even if he didn't for some reason believe it. It sounded good. That was really all that mattered. "Thank you...I'm sorry..." Miller Milano Miller continued to stand there watching Kikue, it was the eyes that where most human he decided. No matter what they did the people on this island peoples eyes still held a sense of intelligence that no animal could amount too.
He almost stumbled as she pressed against him, and now crying, slowly he wraped his own arms around her now gently strokeing her hair, "You don't have to be sorry, they do... the ones who did this to you... too us to any one on this island." Yamamoto Kikue That had just about done it. Kikue took one of her paws and placed it over her face, fairly breaking down sobbing at hearing those words. Who should be sorry? Who should be sorry for all of this? Her? Her father, for breaking her hand in the first place? The labs...? She could always stay calm, could always intelligently give an answer, but not like this. Not after killing a rabbit and gorging on it, not after going to see a friend and thinking about all of these things. She didn't know who was supposed to be sorry. Just that, she was. Sorry. Sorry for not being in control...why, when she couldn't be? Her crying was something between animal and human. She pressed the pads of her paw harder onto her face, like it might mask some of it. Oh gods. Oh gods. What was she doing here? Miller Milano Miller made quite hushing sounds strokeing her hair still holding on to her. She seemed so frail at that moment, a girl turning in to something so powerful that she could easily swat him aside and yet she was falling apart it seemed in his arms.
Slowly he took the paw that she tried to cover her face with smiling sadly, he leaned over very slowly and gave her a very brief kiss on the forehead. "It'll be okay, I promise." he whispered quietly. So long as we both don't loose our selves.. he added on in his own mind. Yamamoto Kikue She was startled, certainly, but a bit far too gone to register anything accurately. She merely looked out over his shoulder, thinking of her father, thinking of what was probably the only time he had ever kissed her -- after her mother had died. He had never been all right after that. Never. He had been...altered... She pushed the thoughts away. She pulled her head back so that she could rightly see Miller's face. He was a lot like Nita. Her ears drooping, she gave the side of Miller's face a big cat-lick, which she had almost done to Nita once before. Kikue remembered it. She graciously released her hold on Miller, bowing low before him as was her custom. 'The spirit in me thanks the spirit in you.'"Thank you...for...for being my friend." Kikue straightened, holding up her wrist that was wearing the bracelet. "And for the present." She smiled softly. Miller Milano Miller continued to hold her stroking gently at her hair, the sudden cat kiss though was a bit unexpected but welcomed none the less in an odd sort of way.
He returned the bow the best he could straighting up with a smile. "You're welcome, for both." He smiled again realizing for once she was genuinely smile with happiness. "I'm glad to see your happy now." Yamamoto Kikue She laughed. "I could usually keep myself happy...in some way...ever since the last change it's been very hard...but I like to see you." It was true. She smiled again, this one just as genuine. "I hope your animal isn't a cold-weather one..." But as soon as she said it, she almost hoped that it might be. Then someone could be in her room with her and not feel the cold as much. How selfish, though, to even think it. She didn't elaborate any farther. "Do you mind if I come to see you again soon..." Kikue asked. Miller Milano "I never was good at entertaining my self with out a computer or some one to bother with what some would call insane rambleings." He smiled, "I like seeing you too, especially when your happy like now. He shrugged, "Even if it's not I can always order a hoodie to wear when I come to visit."
He shook his head, "I don't mind at all." With that he waved goodbye heading back to his own duplex sipping on the other coke he brought with him. Maybe there were people here who he could be good friends with.
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Posted: Mon Nov 27, 2006 4:32 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 02, 2006 11:57 am
[reserved for RP info tag]
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Posted: Sat Dec 02, 2006 12:04 pm
It was noon now, and after a night of restless sleep and twisted dreams Miller finally got some good news in the form of a note left on his door from Kikue. All it said was that she wanted him over for tea and a movie or two. None of which Miller would complain about after his most recent night sleep, he frowned wishing he had more painkillers from the Halloween party, he felt like he must have fallen out of his bed and hit a few bones during the night. His body felt sore for some reason. He shrugged it off and headed out the door with out another thought about it.
A few minutes latter he arrived at Kikue's duplex and gave the door a small knock, "Hello? Kikue?"
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Posted: Sat Dec 02, 2006 12:11 pm
Kikue was making the finally touches on what she hoped would be an acceptable table. After calling the labs, she had gotten a few extra things to make it just right... The table was low, a custom from home, and draped with a cloth. On its surface she had placed a tiny steaming pot, with handle-less ceramic cups and a pitcher. This was her tea table as it had always been; customs brought from both England and home. She liked to mix the two.
The knock sent the butterflies zooming around in her stomach. It was the first time she'd ever invited anyone over. What if her instincts took control? What if she couldn't keep herself in check once someone was inside again? I have to...just stay calm...I can do it...I can control it...
She pressed down the front of her yukata. She'd had a hole sewn in the back for her large, fluffy tail. It still felt strange.
Padding to the door, she put a paw on the knob and pulled it open tentatively. Peeking her head through the crack, she saw that it was Miller...he was a little later than she'd expected, but she hadn't exactly been ready on time. I hope I don't fall asleep...this is always the time when I nap...
"Hello," she said, smiling a little. Wow this was awkward. Please don't let the instincts do it again...please...
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Posted: Sat Dec 02, 2006 12:18 pm
Miller fidgeted slightly on the door step waiting for Kikue to come to the door, what really only took a few seconds felt more like forever for Miller. It didn't occur to him that the butterflies in his stomach could mean something more then just being nervous.
As the door cracked open he felt a little better but his stomach still continued to flip about and his bones still ached from unseen bruises that didn't seem to exist. He smiled any way though as Kikue opened the door, "Hello Kikue..." he paused, what else was there to say? Awkward much.
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