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 Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 1:39 pm
But there wasn't anything behind his eyes - just a hollow, eerie calm.
"...I don't remember saying that," he said dreamily, blinking twice. "...Besides, if I don't let him help me, the voices will only come back. I don't like the voices."
His tail drooped over the edge of the bed, the end swaying to and fro.
There was a weird silence in the room - moreso than normal. To keen ears, the hum of the fridge was dominant. Something was missing.
The hands of his pocketwatch had stilled. It hadn't been wound today.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 1:53 pm
Emerwyn's animal ears twitched, annoyed by the sudden silence. She didn't know what caused the silence, or what had filled it before.
Is this another one of his personalities? she mused. No, no... they wouldn't be speaking as Julian... Everything she thought about brought her full circle to one, terrifying conclusion.
This was Julian - and Cheshire had broken him.
She gave up her endless search in his eyes. She almost gave up entirely.
She didn't tell him to fight the other voices on his own. She didn't tell him to believe in his own strength. She didn't tell him that Cheshire was wrong, that Julian was his own person.
Emerwyn had lost her own strength.
This boy was so lost, trapped, within his own mind. What could she do to help him? She remembered what she'd said to Ian - "I'm so helpless..." She felt that way now. She wanted so to help him...
As the tears fell rapidly down her face, she recited:
"What happened to the boy?
He's gone away.
If only I'd met him
If only he'd stayed...."
Her voice grew softer.
"Oh, where is the boy?
I wish I could find
A key to open up
The door to inside
So that he may know
...I am still here."
The words were slightly altered, and not due to forgetfulness.
"Oh, boy, if you hear me
Please, let me know
Call out my name." These words were spoken louder.
Then, her voice fell again, subdued by tears.
In a barely audible whisper, she concluded:
"I wish I could reach him.
I wish I knew how.
But it seems it's with him
That the battle lies now."
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:06 pm
Julian listened dimly, only a slight confusion crossing his face.
"...Why are you crying....?" It was very soft and quiet. His ears trained on her poem as she recited, gaze softening.
He felt so...strange. Hazy. SOMETHING wasn't right, but he wasn't sure what. It was so...quiet....
Somewhere in the back of his mind, he realized what was missing.
Gently...very gently...he reached out to take Emerwyn's hand, guiding it up to rest it over...his heart?
...Or his pocketwatch?
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:11 pm
Emerwyn looked up as Julian softly guided her hand. She ran her fingers down the side of the pocketwatch, an inquisitive look on her face.
Then, something occured to her. This pocketwatch had stopped. But, it had been running, and not that long ago....
"Do you want me to... fix it?"
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:16 pm
Julian nodded very faintly, glad she understood.
"...Otherwise I might never be on time...." What was this supposed to mean?
In any case, it simply needed to be wound up - it wasn't broken. In fact, it was in beautiful shape.
"Seven turns."
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:21 pm
She complied, and taking the beautiful watch into both her hands, she delicately turned the mechanism seven times round.
She gently laid it back to rest against his chest, and sat back, listening to the ticking. The void was filled again, and Emerwyn was now aware of a new sound that meant Julian.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:29 pm
Julian shut his eyes, listening to the steady ticking.
"...Cheshire...." He took a deep breath, trying to steady his again-shaking tone. "...I can hear my watch. I have one, too. As long as I do...I...I can still be my own White Rabbit. I can...I can...guide myself."
Cheshire leered.
'Julian...I'm hurt. I did think you trusted me. And after I protected you from the Queen.... He stood, stretched, and prowled back into the darkness.
'...We will discuss this later on.'
With a little gasp, Julian opened his eyes, putting a hand to his head. But it WAS still Julian - unmistakable.
"...M-Miss Emerwyn...?" He looked at her sheepishly, rather embarrassed over the whole display.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:35 pm
Emerwyn breathed a sigh of relief as she heard Julian speak. The words he said to Cheshire... He was alright!
She smiled widely, and some tears fell loose and trickled down her cheeks.
"Julian - you frightened me so...." She looked at the watch. "But... what happened?"
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:40 pm
Cheeks turning a bit red, Julian grabbed a tissue for her and held it out shyly.
"...I...I'm not sure. I've gotten so used to hearing my watch...I guess it's like my second heartbeat." He glanced at his bleeding palm and winced.
"...I guess I need to hear it...or...."
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 2:56 pm
This is deep... very deep.
"A second heartbeat...."
Emerwyn was entranced by this.
She took the tissue from her with a small 'thank you,' and dabbed at her already drying tears. They had gotten to the point where almost all that was left was a sticky, salty residue. Like one gets after swimming in the ocean.
She saw him wince and followed his eyes down to his hand. "Here, let me see..."
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:02 pm
Gingerly, he held it out, showing her the little incisions. As he did, however, he licked his lips, thinking a bit.
"...Thanks."
It was timid, but heartfelt.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:14 pm
She pulled out a soft pocket handkerchief, one that matched the diamond patterns on her clothes. Ever so lightly, she dabbed the blood from the wound. Then, she folded the cloth and tied it around his hand.
"There," Emerwyn patted his hand. "That should stop the bloodflow a bit, and protect the open cut. It's quite sanitary..."
She fell silent for a moment. She didn't want to say anything. There wasn't really much else she could say. After all, if she should say anything about.... anything it could undo all that she - that Julian - had done.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:17 pm
He flexed his fingers a little, then smiled at Emerwyn.
...Now what? Had...had he scared her? He hoped not. Cheshire...well, that can't have been pleasant for her....
"...I'm...really sorry. For...you know." He blushed.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:20 pm
"No. Don't be. In fact... I'm sorry. I-I pushed you too hard... I-"
Emerwyn faltered.
"It's my fault. But..."
I'm glad that I did.
She hoped, in her eyes, he could tell that she was.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2005 3:23 pm
He stared into her eyes for a long moment...then cleared his throat, embarrassed, and offered a sincere smile.
"...Well, I'm just glad I didn't...scare you off." A feeble laugh.
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