|
|
What are your thoughts on critiquing? |
YES!!! |
|
48% |
[ 47 ] |
Eh... |
|
49% |
[ 48 ] |
NO!!! |
|
2% |
[ 2 ] |
|
Total Votes : 97 |
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:12 am
Izzy had stayed in the same position, listening for anyone comeing up behind her. And that was exactly how the "person" attacked her. She had heard him as he approached and she shifted her weight to her right foot. As soon as he was close enough, she spun around, extemding her left leg to trip the thing, wich it did, and as she turned she snapped her knife out and had it pointing straight at it neck. "don't move or you'll have a knive in the back of you neck." she hissed. At first glance no one would ever expect she was capable of fighting, or threataning someone. But there she was, pointing a knife at this things neck. "what did you do to them?" she hissed again. He laughed and replied casualy, "your family? I killed them." Her grip tightend on the knife and out of pure rage she drove the knife into the back of his neck, and kicked him in the ribs. She didn't want to believe it, but she had to. Her second family was gone. If you've ever lost your family, double that pain, and that would be what Izzy was going through then.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:26 am
Ryn was running across rooftops, heading in the direction he had last seen the Elf going, searching for him, and the girls who had gone with him. He thought he could smell a purifier in that direction, and he had to make up for his earlier mistake in letting the other go. As he neared the edge of the town, he smelt blood, and from the scent of it, it was the Purifiers.
"At least someone got it....",He said quietly, still running, his claws clacking.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:31 am
Nendir stayed perched in the tree for a good part of an hour after Izzy disposed of the monster. He would have loved to know why the thing had killed her family, and to know if anymore creatures like him would be coming for Izzy as well, but the opportunity for being able to answer these questions was long gone. He didn't blame Izzy for taking vengeance, he in fact encouraged it. Her anger would outweigh the hurt she was sure to be feeling, and if not, she would at least not be saddened all of the time.
"Izzy, are you still in the mood to acquire your bow?" Maybe she had it in her to be a defender, he wasn't sure. But one thing he was positive abut was he couldn't leave Izzy here, it would be irresponsible to just leave her to possibly be slaughtered. He just hoped she had at some point thought of the same thing. But if not, he was going to throw the idea out there. "We should probably head to your home and grab some essentials, you can object all you like, but I'm not leaving you here."
He jumped from the tree and began to head toward the town once more. "Lead the way, I have no idea where you live." He smiled at her, not too much, but enough to show that he cared.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:47 am
Izzt nodded, retrieved her pocket knife and caught up to Nendir, slowing to his pace once she was slightly ahead of him. She weaved through the town, and shortly arrived at her house. It wasn't far, probably only a mile and a half. She walked up the short pathway that led to the door, and reached out to turn the doornob and open the door, but she stopped. She didn't want to see her family dead, but if she was to retreive her possetions, she'd have to. Izzy took a deep breath and opened the door, stopping again. Her body went rigid. Her foster parents and her brother were tossed into a bloody pile in the corner of the room and the floor was lined with thier blood.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:49 am
((I'm still oh so lost. xDD Everyone's paragraphs are so long (well most) and I know they have nothing to do with me so I don't read them. >>; Need..someone..unoccupied..xD))
Kimiko took another bite out of her apple as she leaned on a nearby wall and slid down into a sitting position. Watching the humans passing by, some gave her questioning looks. Ones that said, "What is this little girl doing all by herself in the middle of the streets? Where are her parents? What is that sword doing strapped on her? Isn't she just a little girl? She shouldn't be playing with weapons.."
She smiled in return whenever a stranger looked at her with that same weird glance each time. Sighing, she closed her eyes and tried to block out all the noises around her.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 11:50 am
((Reese is available.)) He watched from the doorway as Izzy mourned her parents. It wasn't that he was a cold hearted person, but he had no ties to these people, other then their adopted daughter and sister.
Without a word he walked past Izzy and into the dimly lit room. The smell of death clung to his lungs like a thick molasses as he advanced on the three bodies thrown into the center of the room in a messy heap.
Dead Mortals always smelled the worst, but he had grown less accustomed to it over the years because as his abilities and fighting skill increased in power, there were less deaths that surrounded him.
"You'll have time to linger on this later. Get your things." He could feel the pull of Her High Majesty upon him. Why had she sent him to rescue this human girl, what was her special purpose, and when was he going to get to go home. "Hurry, before we run out of time Izzy." In just a few moments a portal would open, and no doubt land him back in Chicago, the only question was whether Izzy would join him or not.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:01 pm
Izzy nodded, and ran up the stairs up to her room. Her backpack was in her closet, and she quickly filled it with spare clothes, and her bow and arrows. She slipped the house key out of her pocket, and stepped over to her dresser. She opened her jewelry box and carefully pulled out a silver chain. As she walked back down to the main entry way, she slipped her key onto the chain and put it on. It would be the only thing she kept to remind herself of her familes.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:04 pm
Ryn had followed the scent of the dead Purifier out into the forest, and found its body.
"Certainly dead...", Ryn said, investigating the body, and finding its throat cut. Sniffing the air, he managed to catch the scent of the being who had killed it, heading into town, which meant its killer had headed that way. Sighing he pushed himself to a stand, and began heading back to the town, following the scent.
As he walked, his claws clacking against the cement, humans shying to the opposite side of the street from him, he tried to figure out who the Purifiers killer might have been. The scent he had was not distinctive, and seemed human, which gave him little clue as to what the beings reason to kill it was. He sighed, and continued onwards.
((Just noting here, that I'm not actually at the house yet, just walking through the town, heading in that direction))
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:08 pm
The minute she consented to following him the portal opened. All they had to do was step through and he was positive it would land them right outside his condo.
While she was upstairs he had quickly laid the bodies out in a row, their arms crossed over their chests and their bodies covered in a large blanket he had found on the couch. There was no way he would leave her family in a rotting heap without some sort of formal prayer and send off into the afterlife.
The portal made no sound behind him, and as he looked at Izzy, a new and feeling washed over him, perhaps sympathy. "Don't be afraid. You can go first, it's just like walking through a doorway."
He spoke in a soft and caring voice, one she had not heard yet, and he didn't know how she would respond. "I don't hurt your kind..you can trust me Izzy." In his culture, when you took someone under your wing, and became dedicated to them, they were to be given your last name, but he doubted Izzy was ready for that, and he would respect her in every way possible.
He stepped to the right and gestured with his hand for her to step through. This was an adventure within and adventure. From the looks of things he had gained a new ally now all she needed was time to allow herself to mourn.
((Unless Izzy says otherwise, we might be gone before you get there. The more the merrier though. ))
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:19 pm
She eyed the portal, not sure of what to make of it, but Nendir hadn't hurt her in anyway, and he showed no intension of doing so. Once again Izzy took a deep breath. And entered the portal. She steped out, and had no idea where she was, it looked so much different from her small town.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:29 pm
((Its ok... If I'm not there in time, I'll find out you left, and it will allow me a great adventure trying to find you tow biggrin ))
Ryn had finally found the source of the scent, but he smelt more blood. This time it was human. He wrinkled his nose in disgust, as he sprinted for the door, hoping that whoever it was, was not another purifier. His wings spread slightly, enveloping him to protect him from attack if the person inside was a foe. He knocked the door of the house open, and glanced in.
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:32 pm
[[Very, very confused here. By 'the purifier's' do you mean me or some other purifier, Sauron, because to the best of my knowledge my character never had anything to do with Izzy other than be nearby and say something about her, and is still on her way to have a nice little massacre. And the character Izzy killed is a he.]]
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:34 pm
((Umm.... From that I meant the one that Izzy Had killed razz Cause that would be the only one that was dead on the body, and I never said he, she or anything about what that purifier was I don't think... razz ))
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:39 pm
A wave of relief washed over him when she entered the portal with hardly any hesitation. He didn't know if it was because she trusted him, or because she desperately needed to get away from the gruesome scene that lay before them. He watched as her slender frame disappeared through the portal t the city. Chances were she had never been there, and would be surprised at what she would find. But she would be invisible until the portal closed completely, that's what made portal traveling so convenient. Nendir took one more look around the home, spotting a family picture on a nearby table. He broke the glass and removed the photo, stuffing it in the breast of his robes. He would keep it for her, until she was ready to forgive the past and move on with her future, until she could gaze upon it without shedding one sad tear. The Elf was just about to step through the portal himself, when he felt the pull of someone with the intent on coming to the house. It was familiar, the demon from before, the one who had seemed to be an ally, but instead seemed more treacherous than the Purifier. But there was no time to waste, every second that passed, the portal grew that much smaller. He stepped through the portal, leaving the gruesome scene behind, and he pushed it from his memory, but still, even now, he felt the tug, the demon was getting closer, but the portal was almost closed. "Welcome to my home.." he said softly, placing a gentle hand on Izzy's shoulder. He let his hand fall and walked across the street. The concrete steps hard under his thin soled shoes as he unlocked his front door. "You don't have to put your things away just yet, if your not up to it. Your bedrooms down here to the left, it has a private bathroom. My rooms upstairs." he pointed to a painted white door on the second floor. "I'm going to meditate. Make yourself at home." He patted her on the shoulder, and made his way upstairs. ((Here is Nendirs Condo first floor: [x]))
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2007 12:52 pm
Ryn got through the door just in time to see the Elven Portal close, and swore loudly when he saw the three dead humans. "Their poor souls.... I wonder... Was it the Elf, or was it the dead Purifier who killed these three?",Ryn whispered quietly. He moved slowly through the building, exploring it until he found a small picture in another room, which showed four people in it. He thought he recognized the girl, and was sure that the three downstairs were part of the family. Ryn sighed, putting the picture back, and stepping outside, sad that he had failed again, and been unable to catch the Elf in time to go where he had gone. He climbed up the outside of the building, and stood on the rooftop, trying to catch a whiff of the scent of the Elf, to find out where he had gone. He failed miserably, and ended up spreading his wings, taking to the sky, and flying away from the town which was slowly coming apart at the seams, heading for the nearest inhabited place, hoping to find the Elf there.
((Yah the nearest place is not Chicago.... Its just a way to go about at random searching... And finding more places to possibly get into fights biggrin ))
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|